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Getting a pm asking details from someone who has NO post at all !

P. Gabriel

Active Member
Apr 19, 2005
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I got a pm asking details and questioning between 2 different massage places. Since I never heard of this nickname, I tried to see his posts in his profile to have an idea of who I was about to answer and unless I'm doing wrong, the guy has never posted. At least, this is the answer I got.

I found this pretty weird and didn't answer back. Is it me or you would do the same ?
 

Sol Tee Nutz

Well-Known Member
Apr 29, 2012
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Look behind you.
I have had a couple of these, just ignore.
 

Merlot

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Nov 13, 2008
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Hello sir,

I found this pretty weird and didn't answer back. Is it me or you would do the same ?

There are over 68,000 members. How tough would it be to keep the board functioning if we all posted just once a month?

For me I don't see why you wouldn't provide an answer. If your problem is safety for her the odds are probably the same with those who do post. Some members who were long time posters were people with questionable or unsafe practices. I would give a general answer without giving the kind details that might impose improper expectations on the lady no matter if I knew the guy or not.

Cheers,

Merlot
 

jacep

Active Member
Mar 28, 2005
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i ignor them but not only masage place but any quesion partcular to any lady i scene. sory for those peopel with 0 posts. even if they have low post count, i look at wat histry was used for postd before i reply.

i did get a few asking me abut recent revus or aditional info sometimes wat i consider to be prvate that i mite not provide in revu. depending on question, i will evaluate it before reply but 0 post for me genraly automaticly means no rply from me... sory.

i allso sometimes get pm from some handel saying their lady that i scene in pass. unless there is some information not in my revu or the handel wasnt use to set up apointment, i am genraly careful.
 

wolfie7

Bemused...
Nov 12, 2005
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Depends right? To each MERBite his own preferences.

Personally, if you have no review history, I ignore. If you do, and I like your reviews and MERB personality, I share. If I've actually met you in real life and like you, which up until a month ago was only one person, and after VIP-1 thanks to Iggy, is now more, I will share in earnest. But even then, only so much, per feedback earlier this year and my own quirks - I do leave out a few details and keep those only for myself. I can be a selfish bastard. :D

Otherwise, those PMs are weird. Like random people trying to friend you on Facebook or LinkedIn. :confused: Ummmmm, no. If you don't contribute to the community, you don't deserve any additional information beyond what's publicly posted. :nono:

(And hahaha, I want to point out I'm not a hypocrite as a longtime MERB lurker. I felt/feel the same way as a sender of PMs.)
 

hungry101

Well-Known Member
Oct 29, 2007
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When I get a PM it is usually from someone that I have exchanged info with in the past. I am always willing to help others as I would wish to be helped. I also like to help get newbies started so that they do not get taken. I do check their posting history and the types of posts they make and the last time they were active. I don't have a problem with newbies as much as I have a problem with long time lurkers that do not contibute. The worst kind is the guy that has been around several years and has 25-50 posts and they are all questions.

Recently I had recieved suspicious PMs. I either ignore them or turn them into the MOD. I recived one PM from someone posing as an SP trying to lure me to meet them. I had a hunch who it was. I turned the post in and the imposter was banned. Now, all suspicous posts are ignored and if you have no history I will not reply.
 

P. Gabriel

Active Member
Apr 19, 2005
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Actually, the reason I started this thread is because the question was from someone who is a member since many years and has 0 posts.

I don't review often but always answer the ones I read and contribute.
 

Doggyluver

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Jan 28, 2004
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I get these PM's on occasion and will check to see if the individual is a reviewer or a lurker. In the latter case I delete and ignore. When I started on the board I was slapped around by members for not contributing, I learned and began to post reviews. The newbies or non reviewers on the board have to learn the same thing.
 

jacep

Active Member
Mar 28, 2005
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i just wantd to ad wat i write above & that is if person has allots of posts but allmost no revues or revues simlar to had great time with lady without any details, i genraly ignore those as well so it isnt just neubies. i will evaluate person asking me questin b4 replying or deleting.
 

neverbored

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Aug 17, 2003
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Getting PM's is one thing... being asked basic info: where is she, how much did you pay, WHAT’S HER NUMBER... seriously? How about you F%$#*&@ scroll onto page 1 or better yet? I mean, why would you even want to wait for my slow ass to answer?

The reality is there will always be a minority of reliable people that post on a regular / semi-regular basis... and lurkers that will benefit from it. And when I say post, I mean actual valued information. As others have previously mentioned, there are so many members that just post to increment their post count without ever really contributing, that probably annoys me more than an actual SHILL.

I much prefer to see it stay this way instead of seeing the threads get polluted to no end. I've been using all sorts of forums (not all SP related) and some try to encourage users to introduce themselves, enforce a posting quota and all sorts of mechanisms to encourage postings... all it does is create a crap load of air.

If someone doesn't want to post... who cares... it would probably be crap anyways. And since all they do is lurk and benefit from regular posters what extra value will they actually provide by just acknowledging what we already know? Should they actually TOFT and report it... 90% will be a shill, and the actual 10% will sometimes be taken seriously... at least until someone with board creds actually confirms… sorry for the vent.

Back on the topic of careless PMs, I think there are plenty of newbies that probably have very limited forum experience and just don’t get the required etiquette from the get-go. They might not even know what stickies are. They don’t always deserve to be burnt at the stake for it… even though it really can be annoying and when the flaming starts, it really is a waste (no matter how cruelly entertaining it can be at times) and once they do get it, they get trigger happy and can’t wait to bust the next newbie == more polluted threads.

I think the best solution would be to keep improving the stickies. Lots of good info in this thread: BEFORE YOU POST , however a little dated. Our reflex should be to simply re-direct them to the right place… and eventually they would get it.

There might even be a vBulletin plugin that could force new users to read through the stickies before they have access to posts. Or not be allowed to PM before a given probation or # of quality posts ? Perhaps a system like reddit by using an upvote/downvote system on posts that will reflect on the OP's (Original Poster) reputation score. The more quality posts; the greater the rep (example: Ajax Helpful Answer module)? Why not some kind of reward system for people that actually TOFT? Why not redeem that into a lottery ? … or even free access to a lawyer? lol

In conclusion, I think merb is still very well organized. The community is thriving and there really is only a handful amount of crap members and we're pretty good at keeping things clean by alerting MODs when needed. As for those newbies… if there was a way to educate them before we bash them, perhaps it would encourage them to become quality contributors instead of feeling unwelcomed?

Just my 2 cents.
 

Doggyluver

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PM's from members with 0 or almost no posts ?

Call me suspicious but over the past few weeks I have received a number of PM's asking about my experiences with various SP's. I have always been more than generous answering PM's but for those of you who have NEVER contributed to the board I will not reply, your messages are deleted. I would be curious to know if other members are also receiving these types of messages as well and if so, what is your policy with them. I sometimes wonder if there are members of the LE out there trolling for info :confused:
 

jacep

Active Member
Mar 28, 2005
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like i sayd for me, i evaluasion all pm & if i recognize poster from get together, i will normaly reply. if person has low post count, no revues, & member for long time, i ignore/delete. if person has 0 posts, i delete alltogether. if person is new & has low post count but has a few revues, i will consider replying. allso if question is beter in revu tread (normaly they ask me abut experience with lady i revued), i will genraly ignore as well.

some peopel ignore my pm as well & even wen i met them in get together & i post revues & share toghts so i feel i am not obligated to rply to any/all pm & even poster with hi post count mite not be answerd.

get pms like was multihour rate discount or hourly rate x hours? did you get cim? sorry but those pms if not in my revu are beter ask in revu tread 4 me or others to answeer (unless masage place wich i understand y it isnt ask in revu tread)
 

smuler

Active Member
Mar 18, 2005
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I ignore them

I look at their history, to determine if an answer is worth my time

Best Regards

Smuler
 

rumpleforeskiin

It's a whole new ballgame
Jan 20, 2007
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I never reply without first reviewing the poster's history.

If he's a new member, I'll sometimes give him the benefit of the doubt, depending on the tone of his message.

If he's a long time member who has not contributed to the board, I'll ignore and delete.

If he's a contributing member, I'll take a look at his posting history to determine if he's someone with whom I want to share information about someone I like. That said, I almost never share explicit information with someone whom I do not know personally.
 

Doggyluver

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Thanks for the input, I thought perhaps I was being a little harsh on new members but am glad some of you took the time to respond and have the same opinion.
 

Merlot

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Nov 13, 2008
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Hello gentlemen,

I don't see how having zero posts invalidates anyone as a legit member. Are we saying that despite having nearly 70,000 members only 200 to 300 members who post count. So 99% of members want to be private and keep their hobbying as much off of the radar as possible. I respect that. A better argument is whether all those who make the effort to post honest reviews should go the extra mile for those who choose not to contribute when they already have access to what we write. That's a very valid viewpoint in my opinion. But then, I would question all those who are making a big habit of hoarding/hiding information while being involved with this buddy to buddy backdoor stream of information.

For a very short time it seemed I was one of the few who had the new contact info on a very desirable lady many acted very anxious to meet. I didn't look at post counts or reputation. They were all legit guys so they all got what they asked for. That's the way I see it.

If he's a long time member who has not contributed to the board, I'll ignore and delete.

I'm far more comfortable helping a newbie who needs it than helping a long time poster with many posts who refuses to review openly and uses info as some kind of leverage.

Cheers,

Merlot
 

Atlante 007

Member
Aug 30, 2010
268
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South shore of Montreal
I agree with that vision, I never thought about verifying the history of the member who is asking about certain SP. I was answering kindly except for weidr questions. From now on, I will check before giving any infos...
 

chowzilla

Well-Known Member
Aug 10, 2011
1,065
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I received a couple PMs as well. I even replied to a first timer. I totally forgot the concept of this board being exclusive and I agree. I realize now that we all invested a lot into this hobby, why would we give our "valuable" feedback to a "scavenger" when they can easily do their own research like we all have done to get to where we are. As for me now... I won't reply anymore. Ty for making this thread
 

frenchie

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Aug 8, 2003
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What about helping the guy out and perhaps encourage them to participate with reviews. Some guys are just shy about reviews and just need an invitation to participate.
 
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