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I bid you all farewell...

General Gonad

Enlightened pervert
Dec 31, 2005
3,463
6
0
It has been quite a journey for me. I have met some real sweethearts and some very nice people through this "hobby." I also enjoyed the insights of many posters in various threads.

But now the time has come to say goodbye. I always hate saying goodbye but there is little choice for me. I have gotten too involved and I need to take a step back from Merb and the "hobby."

Someone on this board sent me a nice email message yesterday. I will not reveal who it is to anyone but one thing this person wrote struck a real chord with me:

"...it seems to me that you need to face the future resolutely and honestly, and decide how you want to live your life going forward. Who and what are really important to you? Who will remember you once you have gone?

...You seem like such a decent guy, but perhaps it's time to take stock of things. If after taking stock you can return to the hobby with realistic expectations then that's great. But the hobby can too easily be both an addiction and an excuse for not facing up to the challenges of life. "

The hobby for me has by and large been more of an escapism. I can blame my wife for denying me sex but ultimately I acted out of pure selfishness. This isn't necessarily a bad thing. I had certain needs that were not being met and chief among them wasn't sex, but the need to communicate my deepest fears in life. I needed to escape or at least attempt to escape.

I so desperately needed someone to listen to me, knowing full well that once the encounter is over, it's back to reality. My reality isn't fun - that much I know - but it is whatever it is. I have to "take stock and face the challenges of my life."

I don't regret what I did because I needed to cope with something that is extremely difficult to cope with. But I now recognize that this lifestyle isn't doing me any lasting good - not on a mental level or physical level.

I never really wanted to admit this to myself but it is the truth. It takes a certain attitude to be a permanent hobbyist and I just do not have it. I get too involved and when you start caring deeply and thinking about the ladies you meet, it's a sign that you're not cut out for this.

I think the hardest thing for me is that I do not want to meet someone special just for two hours, two days, two months or two years. I want to live with someone special and grow old together. I want to love that person with all my heart and give her everything I got. I think I have that someone special in my wife and now I hope we can try to make it work. We both deserve to be happy.

I also need to spend more time with the people that mean the world to me - i.e., my family and close friends. There is nothing in this world like family and close friends and I am blessed to have them in my life. I want to spend more time with them.

Finally, let me wish each and every one of you a long, happy and most of all healthy life. Try not to take anything or anyone for granted.

To my gems - Samy, Karma, Gia, Emely and Catherine - please remember that I will be praying for you and thinking of you. Nothing will make me happier than knowing you have found true and lasting happiness in your lives. I would love to see you all one day but I am not going to pay for this privilege.;)

To Stripper Lover, I'm just glad we met. You may be cynical on the outside but I know you've got a heart of gold.;) Take care my friend and please give Celine a big kiss from me. Let her know that it would be my honor to take her out for dinner one day.

To Doc, EB, Regnad, btyger, Daringly, Anik, and too many others to all list here, please take good care of yourselves. Yes, even you Special K, I wish you all the best.

God bless,

GG
 
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mrten

Psychiatric help, 5 cents
Mar 22, 2005
377
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General

Farewell General, more power to you.
 

redstorm

Member
Jan 23, 2004
146
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16
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Good Luck To Your Future Endeavours

Hello,

It was a pleasure to have met you and sat with you for dinner two weeks ago. Sorry we didn't get a chance to talk more. Thank you for your insights in the past few months, I was glad to come back.

I hope all the best to you and your future.

Redstorm
 

eastender

New Member
Jun 6, 2005
1,911
0
0
All the best

All the best GG.Apply the same energy to your search.
 

Robin

New Member
Mar 11, 2003
313
1
0
US
www.sexwork.com
Good Luck GG! I hope you have no regrets about your short but intense hobbying life. If your future lifestyle has room for an occasional trip to the cookie jar, you can come back as General Boomerang. ;)
 

Rex Kramer

New Member
Nov 28, 2004
927
0
0
US
best of luck to you, GG

It has been a pleasure of meeting you on this board and best of luck as you move forward. I think we all appreciate all the contributions you have made to the board for the time you have been with us. I am not too surprised that you are bidding us farewell, but just wished that it did not come so soon.

The general is in charge of his destiny and may the general win this war even though he may lose a few battles along the way!

--Rex
 

Techman

The Grim Reaper
Dec 23, 2004
4,199
0
0
All the best GG

I hope you find the same happiness you wish for everyone else and more.
You have friends here and if you ever need someone to talk to you know where to come. Take good care General Gonad, you will be missed.

Techman
 

bond_james_bond

New Member
Apr 24, 2005
1,024
0
0
Good luck General Gonad! Glad you enjoyed your time hobbying, but even more glad that you decided to quit and get things together with your wife.
 

breadman

Mr. Big
Jan 2, 2004
1,125
0
36
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General Gonad said:
It has been quite a journey for me.

I have gotten too involved and I need to take a step back from Merb and the "hobby."

I dont want to get too personal...but it seems the two statements summarize what many go thru in this business.

Ive seen it happen many times before...mainly with those living near what we in the hobby call "mecca". Im going to assume GG either lives in Montreal or frequents the city. The hobby is no longer a hobby when your devoting most of your free time to it.

You have to be able to seperate your personal life from the hobby..and that's only possible if you stay far enough away from it (month's at a time) so you dont get drawn too far in. Anytime i see a poster hit 1,000 posts in under 6 month's I have to wonder if he's jumped in too quickly.

My advice to GG...get out while you still can. The risk isnt worth it.
 

godddess_harmonia

New Member
Feb 25, 2006
21
0
0
Montreal
Farewell... on the board

Haven't known you for too long, but long enough to know that you are a decent man who stands up for what you believe in. It's not an easy mission, but I hope you find what you are looking for.

And who knows, we might bump into each other on the streets of Montreal without recognising each other.

"It's a small world after all."

Harmony xox
 
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Lion Heart

Missing in action...
Jan 5, 2005
900
2
0
I'll just say "au revoir", dear General.

I may be wrong, but considering that your previous official "retirement" for the same basic reasons lasted about 2 weeks, something tell me you're going to be back soon.

Everybody has his motivations to go into the hobby and to get out. In your case, these motivations seem to be the same, e.g. your wife. From your posts and our PM exchanges, I think you're way to impulsive and passionate to really stay put, unless you really can turn it around with your wife. This may be the hardest path, but it can also be the most rewarding if you are made for each other.

Whatever path you'll choose, I wish you to find the happiness and inner peace you're seeking.

Lion Heart
 

Lee STONE

Member
Mar 11, 2005
209
1
18
Mtl.
GG

I know we have never met in person, and was hoping that this summer we would have..I just want to thk you for being here on this board..

I enjoyed reading your posts, you also brought among us many very interesting topics, which I have found very interesting and helped me gain a lot of insight...thank you..

I will miss you on here as will many others....and thks for all those great compliments..it really meant a lot...

I wish you all the best in HEALTH and Happiness.....

Take care my friend..


Lee STONE
 

The Wizard of Oz

1006 yrs old and retiring
Dec 19, 2005
171
0
0
Bye Bye!

Good luck GG!
It's been a pleasure!
And have fun!
:)
 

Canadian Joe 652

I do all my own stunts
May 31, 2005
633
0
0
in between airport lounges
Take Care

Take care, have fun and I hope you find what you are looking for.

CJ
 

naughtylady

New Member
Nov 9, 2003
2,079
2
0
57
montreal
I wish you all the best.

We have had some good discussions and debates. I was very happy to meet you at Celine's dinner. You did make some friends here, and I am 1 of them.

Ronnie,
Naughtylady
 

skywalker

Member
Feb 20, 2005
125
0
16
Time to move on

General Gonad said:
...
I have gotten too involved and I need to take a step back from Merb and the "hobby."
...
I never really wanted to admit this to myself but it is the truth. It takes a certain attitude to be a permanent hobbyist and I just do not have it. I get too involved and when you start caring deeply and thinking about the ladies you meet, it's a sign that you're not cut out for this.

....
GG

Couldn't have said it better myself. It is time to move on.

Happy retirement!
 

General Gonad

Enlightened pervert
Dec 31, 2005
3,463
6
0
Thank you for your kind words

Good morning,

I wanted to take the time to thank all of you for your kind words, including you Mod5.;) It will be equally tough not to share my thoughts and insights with this board on a daily basis. There are so many people here that appreciate scratching beneath the surface. Please keep the level of exchanges up to the highest standards.

As far as your reviews go, I highly recommend that you write them from the heart and not only the mind. Two of my favorite reviewers have always been Lion Heart and Lee Stone precisely because they have passion for the women they see and it emanates in their writings.;)

Now, many of you are convinced that my leaving the hobby will be short-lived. Well, I will not argue that the temptation will always be there and I cannot promise that I will never be back. Undoubtedly, there will be many moments of weakness in my attempt to disengage.

But the old Socratic dictum - "Know Thyself" - applies to each and every one of us. Right now I recognize that I am not in the right state of mind or physical shape to continue hobbying. More importantly, I know what I want out of life and hopefully I can achieve it with the person that I am currently sharing my life with. We all need to be true to ourselves - the rest is irrelevant.

By nature I am very passionate about life. When I put my mind to something, nothing stops me. Persistence is one quality that I have always had and my illness only reinforced it. No matter what, I need to persevere.

I would like to take this energy into my next project of life - writing a movie screenplay. I love writing and I want to write something inspirational.

So stay tuned fellow Merbites and have a great summer. I will stop by from time to time to say hello. Also, some of you can still reach me on my hotmail account.

All the best,

GG

P.S. Lion Heart & Lee Stone, I passed up an opportunity to see Samy later on this week. Either I am insane or I am really ready for a long break.;)
 
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