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Thread: Frivolous Posts Thread

  1. #1
    Psychiatric help, 5 cents
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    Frivolous Posts Thread

    HEY, you missed your bus? Lost your comb? Well it's time to post it in the "Frivolous Posts Thread!"
    Read a story in the paper and think that everyone needs to know, well post the link here.
    Obits & dog humps cat stories are most welcome.
    Little old lady crossing street finds a million dollar lottery ticket only to be hit by truck stories. No link or story to inane. Feel free to contribute.
    Last edited by mrten; 03-20-2007 at 10:26 AM.
    I pulled into Nazareth, I was feelin' about half past dead...

  2. #2
    Ok, I just found this link that I think fits well in this thread. Although I'm pretty damn sure that the female board members will not find the subject matter to be 'frivolous', I certainly found the letter itself to be funny!

    http://static.scribd.com/docs/24cxgzsz26k1n.swf

    If for some reason the link does not work, let me know and I will post the text of the letter here instead.
    And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

  3. #3

    Thumbs up

    Quote Originally Posted by Techman
    Ok, I just found this link that I think fits well in this thread. Although I'm pretty damn sure that the female board members will not find the subject matter to be 'frivolous', I certainly found the letter itself to be funny!

    http://static.scribd.com/docs/24cxgzsz26k1n.swf

    If for some reason the link does not work, let me know and I will post the text of the letter here instead.
    Of course the link doesn't work... at least not for me..!!

  4. #4
    Here it is...unfortunately the formatting was lost during the copy/paste operation but it is still readable.


    AN OPEN LETTER TO
    MR. JAMES THATCHER,
    BRAND MANAGER,
    PROCTER & GAMBLE.
    Dear Mr. Thatcher,
    I have been a loyal user of your Always maxi pads for over 20 years, and I appreciate many of their
    features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback
    riding or salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts.
    But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart
    enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel
    each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.
    Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from "the curse"? I'm guessing you
    haven't. Well, my "time of the month" is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces
    violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be transformed
    into what my husband likes to call "an inbred hillbilly with knife skills." Isn't the human body amazing?
    As brand manager in the feminine-hygiene division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what
    exactly happens during your customers' monthly visits from Aunt Flo. Therefore, you must know about the
    bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-
    control behavior. You surely realize it's a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend
    Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because
    he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy! The point is, sir, you of all
    people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in capri pants. This brings me to the
    reason for my letter.
    Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my
    uterus, I opened an Always maxi pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: "Have
    a Happy Period."
    Are you fucking kidding me?
    What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness- actual smiling,
    laughing happiness is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit
    pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak girl, there will never be
    anything "happy" about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlza and lock yourself
    in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreens armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy
    plan to end your life in a blaze of glory. For the love of God, pull your head out, man. If you just have to
    slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually
    pertinent, like "Put down the Hammer" or "Vehicular Manslaughter Is Wrong"? Or are you just picking on us?
    Sir, please inform your accounting department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in
    monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss
    your Flexi-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bullshit. And that's a promise I
    will keep.
    Always.
    Best,
    Wendi Aarons
    Austin, TX
    And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

  5. #5
    Registered User
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    Hope they gave her a free 6-month's supply for her troubles.

  6. #6
    I have found the funniest thing in the world. Go to youtube or google video and do a search on Mr. Methane. I can't stop laughing.

    A guy farting "Flight of the Bumblebee" (really). Is that frivolous enough for this thread?

  7. #7
    Psychiatric help, 5 cents
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
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    384

    Reasonable?

    Sugar-shack flap

    The issue of reasonable accommodation is again making headlines -- this time at a sugar shack south of Montreal.
    On March 11, a group of 260 muslims held a private party at l'Erabliere-Sous-Bois, in Mont-St-Gregoire.
    At one point, the muslims held a prayer on the dance floor.
    Some non-muslims were asked to leave the room during the prayer.
    They refused and cancelled their outing.
    A coalition representing Quebec sugar-shack restaurateurs is also upset the sugar shack's owner served the muslims pork-free pea soup and beans. Video http://montreal.ctv.ca/cfcf/video_popup?news_id=11056
    I pulled into Nazareth, I was feelin' about half past dead...

  8. #8
    I am me, too!
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    If only I knew...
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    Serving pork-free soup and beans to Muslim is no problem, it's the owner's choice and the Muslim's choice. Problem is some now exclusively serve pork-free stuff, no matter what, in order to appeal to Muslims. Now, that's not ok. A sugar shack is typically Canadian and pork is a big part of Canadian culture. A sugar shack without "oreilles de criss", pork roast, ham, beans with lard, pea soup with lard, isn't a Canadian sugar shack anymore. I expect to see those when I visit a sugar shack. A place who decide to stop including these will loose my clientele. I have no interet in eating chicken nugget at a sugar shack, as one is doing. These should loose the title "sugar shack/cabane à sucre" since they no longer respect the tradition.

    I agree 100% Muslim should be able to experience a version of sugar shack adapted to them but, they must realize it's not 100% the same without the "culinary" experience. In this case, Muslim aren't to blame, they just asked. The peoples to blame are the ones who agreed and went overboard by adapting a menu for everybody instead of only for the ones asking.

    What's also totally unacceptable, one way or another, is the owner who accepted to clear a room, where other peoples were already, in order to allow Muslims to pray. The peoples who were already there were playing music and having fun when they were asked to stop playing music and wait outside in order to allow the Muslims to pray. In this case, the Muslims should have only gather in a part of the room and pray while other were still enjoying themself. Accomodations must go both way. In this case, Muslims should have accomodated themself of the peoples who were already there. Prayer is in the head so, music is not an issue. I have friends who are from a different religion and, even at the sugar shack, they pray in the middle of the crowd, with music playing and kids running around yelling, and peoples barely notice they're praying.

  9. #9
    proud infidel
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    Quote Originally Posted by mrten
    HEY, you missed your bus? Lost your comb? Well it's time to post it in the "Frivolous Posts Thread!"
    Read a story in the paper and think that everyone needs to know, well post the link here.
    Obits & dog humps cat stories are most welcome.
    Little old lady crossing street finds a million dollar lottery ticket only to be hit by truck stories. No link or story to inane. Feel free to contribute.
    One man's junk is another man's treasure
    fml

  10. #10
    A frivolous section on discussion boards is a necessity... and ... Sorry guys, just caught myself staring at Lilly Lombard's collar bone ...

  11. #11
    Amor est vitae essentia
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ziggy Montana
    just caught myself staring at Lilly Lombard's collar bone ...
    I got caught checking the Pair of Aces.
    She was up a stair to nowhere
    A room forever I'll remember
    She stared as though I should have known her
    Tell me what's your pain or pleasure
    Every little thing you find here
    Is simply for the thrill you're after
    Loneliness or hearts of fire
    I am here to serve all masters

  12. #12
    A sugar shack is typically Canadian and pork is a big part of Canadian culture. A sugar shack without "oreilles de criss", pork roast, ham, beans with lard, pea soup with lard, isn't a Canadian sugar shack anymore. I expect to see those when I visit a sugar shack.
    I gained 5 pounds just by reading that! Now I'm really hungry.
    And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

  13. #13
    Psychiatric help, 5 cents
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    Quote Originally Posted by orallover
    Friv. thread?
    Friv.thread on MERB?
    wow... I wonder who created this thread. 2 + 2 = 4, right? I think I can see a few things more clearly now
    Now if I could figure that one out
    I pulled into Nazareth, I was feelin' about half past dead...

  14. #14
    Quote Originally Posted by orallover
    5 pounds? well.. just imagine how you have to explain to people here about Vista and its security features.. that will make you lose that 5 pounds
    If I did that I'd probably lose about 20 pounds due to my head exploding!
    And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

  15. #15

    On becoming an elf

    Quote Originally Posted by mrten
    HEY, you missed your bus?
    That one time I missed the bus had consequences of tornado proportions. Moments before, as I was walking through the valley of darkness, it seemed I would remain mostly alone: I was coming to the realization that my individual liberation front would remain too weak to produce significant action. Surrounding Wei was never a strategic possibility because, at the time, no one had told me that I was supposed to rescue Zhao. Sure enough, I knew where to find rotten timbers though I couldn’t locate the beams on which the oppressive forces were sitting. Which bridges are worth burning? Still, in my head, Kafka’s sentence was beating down like summer rain: “From a certain point onward there is no longer any turning back. That is the point that must be reached.”

    A troubled mind will cause the legs to move slower and miss buses. The rage against the machine will bring out one’s dysfunctionality and primitive guerilla action will start countdown to one’s own demise. Been there, done that, to no avail.

    So I missed the bus and so did she (insert dramatic effect here), Patty, Patty with a purpose, Patty with all the answers, Patty the hip girl with the Green & Black flag, Patty no one can possibly out-left, my classmate with the shapely legs and high cheekbones who is minutes away from changing radically the previously scheduled course of action (i.e. catch the bus, daydream in class, catch the bus, eat, shit, wash, get stoned, sleep with headphones on) and become the best fuck of my life. College would have to take a short recess because this day was about to become one of extreme unrest. She said: “Free your mind, your ass will follow”. After that, sex became a liberating experience and became ONE with the fight.

    Thinking of the hobby now: when assessing our reasons to resort to sexworkers, we speak of many things. The reasons are often trivial, some reach deeper, it’s complicated. Misery loves company, I don’t know, something like that…

    Thinking if the hobby, expressed like a primal scream, wouldn’t perhaps be the coming out of a deeply buried rage for autonomy…

    Oh fuck this is deep! Pressure needs to be released, this is a hobby emergency! Time to book V…
    Last edited by z/m(Ret); 03-21-2007 at 05:18 PM.

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