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Involved with SP outside of "work"

malboro_man

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Feb 24, 2005
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First of all, please don't flame me. I am just here to blow off some steam.

You know what they say, "don't mix business with pleasure".

Four months ago, I began seeing a SP. We found that we have alot in common despite the age difference (almost 20). At her own volition, she divulged her real name (first and last), her contact info (phone and email). We began seeing each other outside of "work". We really clicked. I don't think that was an act on her part.

I began to fall for her, not just on a physically level. I have not seen any other SPs for a few months now and other women don't excite me any more. It could be infatuation or the real thing. I haven't felt like this for someone in a long time.

It's much easier banging a SP and do the "wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am" routine. That's the reason I rarely see a SP more than twice. But, this case is different. She made me feel special. I don't know if she does this to all her johns, but she said I am her favorite. I believe her (or want to) otherwise she would not have divulged such personal info.

I don't know how she feels about me besides a "f**kfriend".

The more I see her, the more it hurts me (I can't sleep, I can't eat, I can't concentrate at work, and the emotional pain is literally gut wrenching), but I can't stop. I want to be more than a "f**kfriend" but it seems unlikely she'll stop being a SP in the near future. It bothers me other johns are f**king her. On a rational level, I know I need to stop seeing her. It just hurts too much.

To really forget her, I tried something that I haven't in a while. I tried being with another SP last night, but I just couldn't consummate the act. I know on some level, I have to let go, but I just can't.

I am sorry for sounding pathetic but I needed to blow off some steam.
 

montreal_monk01

A monk on the loose ;p
Jan 10, 2006
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Malboro_man,

Please don't feel bad about this. It's natural that you felt for her.
I would suggest you set that straight with her: tell her your deep feelings, what you want and what you don't and see if that fits with her.
Who knows...she's probably waiting that you straight the records straight.
I know it's not easy but the job has to be done: it happened to me -> I had a 2 years affair with an sp. After the 2 years, she wanted the relationship to go one layer upper. The upper layer did not suit me, so I had to cut with that relationship. It was tough to proceed with the halt of such fun and passionate relationship...but I was not interested to turn it into a more formal/serious relationship. Good luck and the best to you!
 

malboro_man

Active Member
Feb 24, 2005
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Kepler said:
If you're not paying her at all (not lending her money, not shopping with her, not paying her bills) then it's probably not an act.

If you are paying, then...

No, I am not paying her. But, I think she's treating me as a "f**kfriend".
 

Joe.t

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Jun 20, 2003
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malboro_man said:
First of all, please don't flame me. I am just here to blow off some steam.

You know what they say, "don't mix business with pleasure".

Four months ago, I began seeing a SP. We found that we have alot in common despite the age difference (almost 20). At her own volition, she divulged her real name (first and last), her contact info (phone and email). We began seeing each other outside of "work". We really clicked. I don't think that was an act on her part.

I began to fall for her, not just on a physically level. I have not seen any other SPs for a few months now and other women don't excite me any more. It could be infatuation or the real thing. I haven't felt like this for someone in a long time.

It's much easier banging a SP and do the "wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am" routine. That's the reason I rarely see a SP more than twice. But, this case is different. She made me feel special. I don't know if she does this to all her johns, but she said I am her favorite. I believe her (or want to) otherwise she would not have divulged such personal info.

I don't know how she feels about me besides a "f**kfriend".

The more I see her, the more it hurts me (I can't sleep, I can't eat, I can't concentrate at work, and the emotional pain is literally gut wrenching), but I can't stop. I want to be more than a "f**kfriend" but it seems unlikely she'll stop being a SP in the near future. It bothers me other johns are f**king her. On a rational level, I know I need to stop seeing her. It just hurts too much.

To really forget her, I tried something that I haven't in a while. I tried being with another SP last night, but I just couldn't consummate the act. I know on some level, I have to let go, but I just can't.

I am sorry for sounding pathetic but I needed to blow off some steam.

I highly recommend the goddess Dhalia for your cures.:p
 

malboro_man

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Feb 24, 2005
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montreal_monk01 said:
Malboro_man,

Please don't feel bad about this. It's natural that you felt for her.
I would suggest you set that straight with her: tell her your deep feelings, what you want and what you don't and see if that fits with her.

Thanks for your comments, monk01.

The problem is that I think she thinks me more like a "f**kfriend". I don't know if she wants a serious relationship. Telling someone "I love you" when you know the other person does not reciprocate is something I cannot bring myself to do. The way I see it, we cannot be anything more than "f**kfriends".

I know this thing that we have has to end, but it's just so hard. I can't even bring myself to consummate the act with another SP last night. I thought seeing another SP would ease the pain. But, it didn't.

P.S., I started hobbying a few years ago because of a failed relationship. It really helped me ease my pain and forgot about the failed relationship. I was mentally and physically healthier and was very productive at work.
 

malboro_man

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Feb 24, 2005
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Joe.t said:
I highly recommend the goddess Dhalia for your cures.:p

I don't know. if I can't consummate the act with a hot 20 year old, I don't know who can.

I have not dealt with such emotional pain and turmoil in such a long time that I find this overwhelming.
 

Joe.t

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Jun 20, 2003
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malboro_man said:
I don't know. if I can't consummate the act with a hot 20 year old, I don't know who can.

I have not dealt with such emotional pain and turmoil in such a long time that I find this overwhelming.

This is what you should do trust me it is going to work, set up a appointment with a different hot babe, then about a half hour before she enters the room pop a viagra then down a couple shots of tequila and smoke one big fat giant joint(make sure it's the good stuff), this will surely make you horny as hell and put you in the mood and you will have one hell of a kick ass time with the sp, it will definitley make you forget about the other one, trust me on this one.:)
 
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Kepler

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May 17, 2006
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malboro_man said:
No, I am not paying her. But, I think she's treating me as a "f**kfriend".


Then just relax. Enjoy your time with her, and let things evolve naturally.

Don't tell her you love her. yet. Go out and do other things besides fucking. Go to a play, a museum, a pick nic, a movie. Talk about Angelina Jolie's latest adoption, about world hunger, about science and art and psychology.

Get to really know her, then get back to us in three or four months.
 

malboro_man

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Feb 24, 2005
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LeGuy said:
You passed my first test. You are no longer paying. Can you tell us why you are so sure she only see you as a "f**kfriends" ?

LG

LeGuy: I think she sees me as a "f**kfriend" because she says she's too young (~20) to have a real boyfriend. She just wants to have fun, according to her. Mind you, we have alot of fun together, but after a while, it's not enough for me. I have not clicked with someone like this in a long time.
 

malboro_man

Active Member
Feb 24, 2005
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Joe.t said:
This is what you should do trust me it is going to work, set up a appointment with a different hot babe....:)

Thanks for the advice, Joe.t. I'll certainly give that a try.
 

hobby11

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Jan 10, 2005
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tell her

to show you a photo of her pimp and trust me on this one, you ll be
out of the fantasy assez rapide merci

nb i bet you she lives somewhere in south shore...
trust me I know a lot...
 

malboro_man

Active Member
Feb 24, 2005
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LeGuy said:
Malboro_man,

What difference do you think it would make if you were dating instead of being "f**kfriend" ? In your answer there might very well be the reason why she just wants to be "f**kfriend".

LG

Initially, it started out with sex. But, as time progressed, I started to become attached/infatuated/in love with her (probably all of the above, but the exact proportion is unknown).

If I were just a "f**kfriend", I would not care if she bangs other guys. Now, I become jealous. I am willing to quit the hobby if she is willing to quit SPing.

I want something more than a "f**kfriend". I know it's bad for me, and I want to end it. But, it hurts me not to see her again, and it hurts me to see her! Like the song says, "can't live with her and can't live without her". No wonder a pair of best friends from my childhood divorced their wives and got together a la Brokeback Mountain.
 

malboro_man

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Feb 24, 2005
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newman1 said:
I appreciate your frankness and I urge not leave yourself to emptiness and routine of work...try having a trip and relax and think of find a genuine relationship....you are a very honest and sensitive person this is why you were able to emotionally get attached to her...
Good luck

Newman1: thanks for your comments and suggestions. Yeah, maybe you are right about me being charmed but her being immuned (except for the sex part because I know she likes doing it with me).
 

malboro_man

Active Member
Feb 24, 2005
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Joe.t said:
.... you will have one hell of a kick ass time with the sp, it will definitley make you forget about the other one, trust me on this one.:)

I took your advice (well, not the viagara, tequila and joint part; I don't do any of them). I had a SP over just now. I finished in 20-min (managed to get a shot on the goal) and asked her to leave. The reason was that I was suddenly overcome with a profound sense of sadness. I didn't know if I was going to break down.

She's young and hot but I am not sure if I feel better or not (after being with the SP). I didn't really want her. It's like when you have no appetite but you're forced to eat at a dinner invitation out of respect for the host.

Nonetheless, I appreciate the support from this group. This part of my life is something no one knows about.
 

malboro_man

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Feb 24, 2005
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traveller_76 said:
Just a girl's advice, but you might consider speaking honestly with the lady you've fallen for--you might find that she'll have something to say ;)

t76

t76: Thank you kindly for your advice. Has this ever happened to you? I mean, falling for a client in your line of work?
 

nacho

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There's nothing wrong with having feelings for another person. What she does really doesn't define who she is. But it may be tough to forge a long term relationship knowing how she earns or earned her living if it turned exclusive. I do understand your feelings, I've been there. It takes a strong and very self confidant man to love an SP while she works in the hobby. But I think the kicker here about her feelings for you is the fact you aren't paying for it. So go with that, and go to the movies, dinners and just spend some quality time out of bed. Friends with benefits sometimes turns into wonderful relationships. best of luck
 

Big Daddy

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Mar 16, 2003
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Malboro Man,

I don't think that you should tell her how you feel. I am pretty sure that she must know how you feel because many SPs read this board anyway.

My suggestion is that you have a nice thing going, so keep it going. Most SPs like the freedom that their profession brings. If she wants to settle down then she will tell you that. At 20, I don't think she wants to settle. Since she told you that all she wants is to enjoy life, you should take it a its face value.
 

malboro_man

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Feb 24, 2005
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LeGuy said:
She would have to trade many freedoms for you. If you love her because she is independent, how would you react if she would totally depend on you?

I would not mind her being dependent on me.

LeGuy said:
I know she is much younger than you are but I have a question. Did you share plans together? For instance she might want to start a business, go to school, etc. What are yours?

I plan on retiring (early) in ten years. She has plans in the medical profession.

LeGuy said:
Maybe this girl gave you a wonderful gift, she made you realize you are ready for a steady relationship. She might not be the "one", but the one before :D

LG

It's hard to admit but you have a point.
 

malboro_man

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Feb 24, 2005
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Big Daddy said:
Malboro Man,

I don't think that you should tell her how you feel. I am pretty sure that she must know how you feel because many SPs read this board anyway.

I agree with you. I saw her today, and we did the nasty thing (2X) before she started "working". It was the greatest thing. We came together which is rare for either of us with a different person. I think that's why we clicked (on a sexual level).

I mentioned about the two SPs I saw on the weekend (one of which I can even consummate the act, and the other I didn't even want to do despite her beauty; I didn't tell her about this part). She did not seem jealous at all and got all excited and wondered if they were hot. She said she was not jealous at all and meant it.

I give up....we have this "thing" going on and that's it.

Big Daddy said:
My suggestion is that you have a nice thing going, so keep it going. Most SPs like the freedom that their profession brings. If she wants to settle down then she will tell you that. At 20, I don't think she wants to settle. Since she told you that all she wants is to enjoy life, you should take it a its face value.

You're right, Big Daddy. Maybe I should just accept things they are or not see her but back to the dilemma in which either way it hurts me.
 

Big Daddy

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malboro_man said:
Maybe I should just accept things they are or not see her but back to the dilemma in which either way it hurts me.

Learn to deal with the hurting part. Life is all about small moments of pleasure. If you were to prolong them thinking that these moments will last for a long time then you are in for some real misery. One day it will all end and that will hurt even more. The only thing you can do is to prepare yourself for the occasion and in the mean time enjoy the small encounters.
 
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