So I took this girl out on our 3rd date& she wore stockings/ladies& gents,need advice
Ok, so my friend sets me up with a french-quebecer girl that he works with. She's about 28. I'm 30. We exchange emails, she likes my pic, I love her pic (she's a hottie), and we meet on our first date. Everything goes well, she's a little shy, but I handle the conversation and make her feel rather comfortable. made her laugh ALOT!!!!!!!!
Then, on our second date, I take her out for drinks and dancing, and only then do I realise that although this girl is a hottie (girl next door type), she seems a little desperate (like as if she's really looking for a boyfriend). So although we have a good time, I get a little turned off by this realisation. she seems to be too perfect almost!
Please note, that I haven't seriously dated anyone since my vicious break-up 4 years ago, so I may be the proverbial "damaged goods" (I was engaged to a girl who had been unfaithfull for the entire 5 year duration of our relationship, hence I was devastated when i find out...at the end. ........................................and at that I found out from other sources (ie: her 2 best friends)/ my coward of a fiancee didn't have the guts to tell me...anyways that's another story). So the take-home message is that I am not sure if I am ready for a boyfriend-girlfriend committment. I just want to get laid with a non-SP on a regular basis, and be friends at the same time (movies, resto, etc...).
Anyways, this girl I took out seems ready for a committment although she did not say it per se.
Anyways, I don't contact her for a week because I was really busy. She then sends me an email saying "well i guess you are not interested in me, it's too bad, we had a great time and i liked you, you're a gentleman, good-looking, kind, etc.....i'm sorry it didn't work out"
yadayadyadayadaa...OK already!! relax!
So I contact her telling her I was busy, and why she's breaking up with me already LOL . She laughs and feels a little embarassed.
please note that during the 1st two dates, she wore pants.
So I take her out for lunch yesterday. She meets me at my workplace and we hop in my car to go to a resto. She looks hot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Little schoolgirl mini-skirt with leather calf-high boots, wearing black nylon..... (she still does not know i am a nylonlover....or should I say THE nylonlover!!!). I get an instant erection. Now I officially want her sexually.
I always open the car door for her, and by the time I walk over to the driver side, she is already leaning over and pushing my door open, even though she knows the doors are automatic and i can unlock it with my remote.....anyways she's sweet like that!!
I hop in, and she slides back into her seat, and what do I see?????????? I see her stocking top!!!!!!. She was fukking wearing stockings on a lunch date..!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. At this point I tell her she looks really sexy today, and she replies with "I knew we were meeting today so i got dressed for you".
I had a full-on piping hot erection.....
Our lunch was good, and I will see her again this week. At this point, I know 100% sure that she's dying to kiss me (has been since date 2), and now I saw all of this sex appeal that she threw on me yesterday (please note that she was engaged last year and it broke off).
I want a fukk friend, but I don't want to hurt her feelings. I was so sure that she wanted a boyfriend, but now I'm not sure what she wants
I need your advice on this matter............
just relax and enjoy the friendship. That way if it turn intimate you have a solid base built as friends. it will be easier to continue an intimate, friendship based relationship than a half relationship that turns awkward once it becomes intimate. if you want to be girlfriend boyfriend with her than just be her friend. don't lead her on in hopes of getting her nylons off. that would result in that only happening a time or two before things fall apart. take time, be her friend, enjoy each others company before pushing for intimicy. then when it happens you'll be comfortable with each other and it can keep happening time and time again.
Thebiggest thing is not leading her on if you want something different than she is looking for. Talk with her and see what she wants and talk about what you ar elooking for. You can always just take it slow and see how things develop. Maybe in a few weeks you do decide that you want someting serious with her, etc.
You gotta keep in mind thaht your friend set you up so if you fuck this one over then you look bad in his/her eyes as well....
or.... send her to me....
Love means never having to negotiate for tea-bagging or tcimas. (barebackblowjobtocomeinmouthandswallow).
Talk to her.............Let her know, that you may not be ready for a relationship just yet, but, you want to take it slow with her and that you like her, she waht she has to say and tak eit from there.
Tell her you don't want to rush things.
To Nylon lover.
I read your first post and why not tell her the truth.
Explain about your relationship that broke up because of cheating yada yada.
That you are emotionally still scarred and not ready for a committed relationship now, but find her very sexy, sensuous, stimulating and attractive,
That seeing her in nylon stockings turned you on so you could not think of anything but how sexy she looked, since then.
and now you are stuck and don't know what to do.
tell her you have to be straight and honest with her, and not be a slime ball. etc.
and think you can have a relationship as"close" friends but cannot commit.
What does she think.
This way you have
1. set up that you are sensitive guy, and honest.
2. you have given her a reason for not wanting to rush into a comitted relationship.
3. you have told her you want to have sex with her.
4. if she has sex with you, she knows the guidlines you have set out.
5. if she does not have sex with you, then you can stay in touch and take the longer road, etc. that way you may have sex with her later. in order to be f** friends sometimes you need to be friends first.
just my .02
good luck with this hottie.
Last edited by spartacus; 12-09-2004 at 03:52 AM.
Compassionate honesty is always the best way to handle this.Don't make her pay for your bad experience, it is not her fault.
Originally Posted by spartacus
Man, I totally agree with you on that one!
Nylon, if you start bulshitting, from one time you see her to the next and so on, you'll have to remember what bullshit you used and, when she catches you (and she will...) you will loose it all.
After all, you're a normal guy, you find her hot and you are attracted to her, it's all normal. No harm in saying. If she want to wait, she'll tell you and you can both take your time. if she's game, you're a lucky bastard! If she's not game yet, you'll be a lucky bastard later!
I think that you are screwed if you want a fu** friend. Since she knows your friend, if you are honest then she is going to tell your friend and you may get dirty looks from both her and your friend. If she did not know your friend then you might be in a different situation.
I would not make much of her sexy apparal. She just wants to get you by your b***. Since she already got three dates with you, she knows that you "kinda like her".
Women look at men differently when they are in their 30's, so be prepared for "strange stares" from both your friend and her, if you choose to be honest.
Fuck friends and bad reaction from buddies?
I never had "strange looks" from any friends because a female friend became a fuck friend. I don't know why Nylon would get in trouble? If his friends would look at him strange, maybe they're not much friends so he'll find out soon enough!
Originally Posted by spartacus
Totally down with Spartacus...be open and honest, if it's meant to be, it'll happen
talk talk TALK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
One of the biggest reasons for relationship failure is " lack of communication ".
I don't think she wants a bad relationship any more than you do. She is obviously letting you know that she is willing to go to the next level.
Now is the time to be clear in your priorities.
Speak with her about what SHE is looking for; both short and long term, and see if there is common ground.
"I just want to be friends" is a real cop out and INSULT. Be able to always put the shoe on the other foot.
If she is honest, she will definitely let you know what is or isn't acceptable in her world.
This is not about: looking good or bad in your friends eyes-F***ing-etc.
This is about honesty-integrity and commitment.
Dude don't be a wuss!
This communication crap is just that CRAP!
Keep the tension (as in sexual) high! Notice how after u did not call for a week... she contacted you. Tell her nothing, keep her guessing. If u must talk about your relationships, just tell her that you are into dating for now and see what develops. If she tries to kiss you, kiss momentarily and then push her back, tell her she is moving too fast... always control the pace. Be cool and in control...
See her no more than once or twice a week and keep the dates short and sweet. Make it seem that she needs to work hard to get and keep your attention. This will drive her crazy...
Also, one other thing, tell her that from now on she must only wear nylons when she sees you... no more pants.
Keep the tension high and she will be whatever you want her to be... and love it too.
My assessment was a worst case assessment. Since I don't know who was the friend that introduced her to Nylonlover (male, female, family friend, friend from the work place etc.). Also, given that she is 28 and it is easy for a woman to find a fu** friend, I had a reason to believe that she is looking for something more than just a fu** friend.
Originally Posted by metoo4
to Nylon Lover
So what happened?
don't leave us hanging here in suspense!