I woke up from an interesting dream this morning. There was this woman dressed in a loose but pretty long white gown, telling me she is ‘the girl next door’ and she wanted to fulfill my every and all wild desires, however I want them. “Wow”, I said in my dream, “my prayer to Zeus has been answered.” Hmmm…problem! The trouble is I have no idea what she looks like, both now and in my dream. Everything about her is blurred. She is, in essence, as vague as the term she used, ‘the girl next door’. Even now, I still wonder, how much ‘the girl next door look' is ‘the girl next door’? Is she beautiful, pretty, plain looking, an ugly duckling or what? I wonder….So goes the vagueness of this often used term, ‘the girl next door’.
No only that, the term ‘the girl next door’ is so very ambiguous in its meanings. When I was a teenager, ‘the girl next door’ to my right was a drop dead gorgeous blonde by the name of Laura. She could easily be the nation’s beauty queen. I swear I would climb the highest mountain, swim across the largest ocean, and duel with the most evil of the evil ogres so I can have her in my arms. She was the reason I wished I could be 10 years older overnight then. So she would not treat me like a kid brother but a boyfriend instead.
Interesting enough, ‘the girl next door’ to my left was an ugly duckling called Karen. No offense to her as we got along just fine. But I swear her pit bull dog looked much better than her. On a scale of 1 to 10, a lot of people would have given her a zero.
I can still remember ‘the girl next door’ to my front was a so so looking redhead by the name of Kelly. A lot of people would say she was a ‘plain Jane’. I imagine if I were married to her, I probably would have a very uneventful family life. May be here and there we would have some domestic arguments over the kids, house chores, and what not. But by and large, nothing to brag about.
There was also ‘the girl next door’ to my back, a long legged pretty looking brunette with all curves at the right place. Her name was Suzie. A lot of people would say she looked like a model but by no means as beautiful as my drop dead gorgeous blonde. She was the youngest of all these girls and we really liked each other. However, my heart was stolen by the beauty queen Laura.
So which ‘the girl next door’ is my dream referring to? I wonder…. To make the story short, now we know the term ‘the girl next door’ is not only vague but ambiguous as well. I have to ask which “the girl next door’ can I refer to. It is Laura or Karen or Kelly or Suzie or Who?
The bottom line is, the term ‘the girl next door’ when being used alone is not meaningful at all. I need to know which ‘the girl next door’ I can refer to. Otherwise, I might as well toss the term ‘the girl next door’ or ‘the girl next door look’ in the trash can. Certainly, I wish my dream date was ‘the girl next door’ by the name of Laura, as I still have a very vivid memory of how drop dead gorgeous she was.
So to all the lovely ladies out there, if you want to date this romantic professor and you claim to be ‘the girl next door’, please send me at least some full length pictures with accurate measurements. Of course, appropriate credits will given to the bare all pictures and videos!!! LORL (laughing out really loud)!!!
From 9998 miles away