I've lost my will for variety

PSEfreak · Apr 3, 2025

Maybe it's my age (50+)
Maybe it's a bit of financial instability
Maybe it's been this history of disappointments
Maybe its my high expectations (vis-a-vis services provided)

I have my own (very short List - 3 ) "go-to" girls and I'm finding it harder and harder to venture outside of this group. These 3 woman NEVER fail me, love them.
2 of the 3 are unavailable for the next 4-6 weeks and the 3rd is harder for me to book because of my schedule.
I made a decision this morning to be patient and wait. No searching for who's available, Indy or Agency. Nothing, I decided to wait for one of them.
I've no doubt I can find at least 1 other who would be amazing. Last week I even inquired on 2 well known SP and reached out about their availability, I just couldn't pull the trigger and book.

I'm wondering if anyone else feels like they are in a similar place as me?

lou67 · Apr 3, 2025

PSEfreak said:
Maybe it's my age (50+)
Maybe it's a bit of financial instability
Maybe it's been this history of disappointments
Maybe its my high expectations (vis-a-vis services provided)

I have my own (very short List - 3 ) "go-to" girls and I'm finding it harder and harder to venture outside of this group. These 3 woman NEVER fail me, love them.
2 of the 3 are unavailable for the next 4-6 weeks and the 3rd is harder for me to book because of my schedule.
I made a decision this morning to be patient and wait. No searching for who's available, Indy or Agency. Nothing, I decided to wait for one of them.
I've no doubt I can find at least 1 other who would be amazing. Last week I even inquired on 2 well known SP and reached out about their availability, I just couldn't pull the trigger and book.

I'm wondering if anyone else feels like they are in a similar place as me?

I am with you, since last September (+66 yrs and retired since 2 years) No more ambition to see anyone other than 1 person which has been my go to, since a year. When not available , I wait when she is and it coincides with my schedule we meet.
Like you, I have all the same excuses.. except financial depending on the SP. Not sure why, but when I look at all the agencies, and misc. Websites, nothing pops up to be interesting anymore.
Tired of having to check pictures of all the fake ones out their, and fake includes that it is her! but forgot to tell us it dates back like 20yrs

, and not a tattoo person, so eliminates 80% of the SP's

And having to search MERB for opinions on them.

Right now I am good, kind of miss in seeing other SP's and then again not. Life and time will tell.
You are not alone.

IamNY · Apr 3, 2025

Maybe it’s because there is no real variety anymore. Back in the Ganza/Devilish days all you had was variety. Now it’s very limited. I totally see your point about seeing 3 girls. When you venture outside of that comfort zone it’s a let down as of late.

DetectiveDavidMills · Apr 3, 2025

I get it.

Sometimes, we have phases like that.

Now, at the moment, it is the complete opposite for me. Yes, I have favorites here and there but I need variety because variety is the spice of life.

smartboy · Apr 3, 2025

I travel in my confort zone for 3/4 years post covid ( same 3/4 girls depending,, ) i'm hunting a little, but its becoming complicated and frustrating, imaging someone getting in this hobby with no experience, good luck buddy

Giselle Montreal · Apr 3, 2025

smartboy said:
imaging someone getting in this hobby with no experience, good luck buddy

I think for anyone, there's always a thrill when trying something new. I see so many clients that are new to the industry and they (we) have so much fun ; beginning in this demi-monde is quite exciting. But when you have seen sex workers for the last 20 years, after seeing so many beautiful girls, you realize your tastes have changed since your first escort, and that your maturity and experience makes you less impressionable.

When I see comments like yours, I can't help but ask if it's really the industry itself that changed so much and became less appealing with less talents and all, or yourself?

smartboy · Apr 3, 2025

Giselle Montreal said:
I think for anyone, there's always a thrill when trying something new. I see so many clients that are new to the industry and they (we) have so much fun ; beginning in this demi-monde is quite exciting. But when you have seen sex workers for the last 20 years, after seeing so many beautiful girls, you realize your tastes have changed since your first escort, and that your maturity and experience makes you less impressionable.

When I see comments like yours, I can't help but ask if it's really the industry itself that changed so much and became less appealing with less talents and all, or yourself?

That's an interesting breakdown—and honestly, pretty accurate in terms of how the landscape has shifted over time. You're touching on something real: the motivations behind escorting can be incredibly varied, and each type brings a different energy to the experience.

Pay for addiction – Sadly, that's always been part of the scene. It's usually a darker side that nobody really benefits from, including the client.
Short-term money need – Totally. Some are in it for a quick fix—rent, school, family stuff—and it’s just a temporary hustle.
The ones who choose it, thrive in it, and enjoy the human connection – This is the rare and fascinating group. The ones who treat it as a craft or a calling, who connect with people, make serious money, and have control over their experience.
Instagram generation / Vegas-style – Yeah… this is a whole other vibe. All surface, little depth. High fees, low connection. For some clients, that’s fine—it’s a transaction. But for those who crave chemistry or conversation, it can be super disappointing.

It’s almost like the world split into “GFE” and “OnlyFans spillover,” with totally different values.

What made you bring this up—something you noticed recently, or just reflecting on the shift?

Valentina · Apr 3, 2025

smartboy said:
The ones who choose it, thrive in it, and enjoy the human connection – This is the rare and fascinating group. The ones who treat it as a craft or a calling, who connect with people, make serious money, and have control over their experience.

Correct. Ties in with the quick money aspect. It’s sad and saturates the market that’s already filled with ladies, some great ones even get overlooked . You clearly see that these women don’t care at all!

smartboy said:
Instagram generation / Vegas-style – Yeah… this is a whole other vibe. All surface, little depth. High fees, low connection. For some clients, that’s fine—it’s a transaction. But for those who crave chemistry or conversation, it can be super disappointing.

I keep seeing this lately on merb and it’s really disheartening. I do OF and also offer services and it’s never like this. I don’t do it for clout or wtv. I started out doing OF and then got into the SP world and was amazed by it!

smartboy said:
It’s almost like the world split into “GFE” and “OnlyFans spillover,” with totally different values.

Again, doing OF has nothing to do with the quality of service you offer. Lots of us make naughty movies! It’s just sifting through the SPs nowadays. It’s super over saturated.

Valentina · Apr 3, 2025

RYANvsEVERYBODY said:
It’s just a numbers game. After enough encounters with agencies, independent, LL… you start figuring it out. Patterns emerge, instincts kick in. It’s not about luck, it’s about volume… and learning what not to repeat.

Spot on bean boy!

Halloween Mike · Apr 3, 2025

I will use the term "regular" loosely as i only see a total of 6 women a year, but i have "regulars" wich i go back to for as long as they remain in the industry. Yet its part of the fun to have new experience and maybe discover one more i will want to go back to. I try to go about 50-50 every years. I see 3 or so women i saw before, and 3 i never saw. Then if i end up seeing one or 2 more, it can be either way. That said its not set in stone. I saw 4 women in 2023 and 5 in 2024 (one was at 700$ tough...wich can explain), so i didn't even reach my "usual" of 6. Depend on finances, current "craving" and so on.

There was a period where i was really into retro video game purchase, and i spent a lot. Right now im so not into it... Granted i bough most of what i wanted already (i had goals, systems in specific and i wanted specific games) but i kinda realized lately i won't even be able to play all i bough before i die even if i live to 90 (wich is unlikely lol) and thats not counting new games coming up. So i kinda put that aside. Even thinking on selling my highest values one that i think i don't really need that much (Parasite Eve 2, Dino Crisis 2 etc, the value is around 150-160$ each)

Past few years i spent a lot at Comiccon as well, but now that i met (and took pics with) specific celebrities, im good, i don't need to meet them again if they come back. So more the years will pass, less i am to spend more than likely. And i have a limit. Like last year they had Robert Englund. Love the guy in Freddy but it was just too expensive for photos and autograph, so i simply passed. Unless they manage to have Emeraude Toubia, now for her i would break the bank in autographs and photos no matter the price lol. But i digress.

There was a time when i was less into meeting but lately i am "feeling it" more. So with me it seem to go with my "mood". I also try to go with 2 meetings per trip, and have at least one a "sure value" , that way i am not really going back home "disapointed" if one of them was not great.

talkinghead · Apr 3, 2025

Giselle Montreal said:
I think for anyone, there's always a thrill when trying something new. I see so many clients that are new to the industry and they (we) have so much fun ; beginning in this demi-monde is quite exciting. But when you have seen sex workers for the last 20 years, after seeing so many beautiful girls, you realize your tastes have changed since your first escort, and that your maturity and experience makes you less impressionable.

When I see comments like yours, I can't help but ask if it's really the industry itself that changed so much and became less appealing with less talents and all, or yourself?

This is off topic but I can't even imagine how different my path would have been if I'd started at the top with you or one of the other great Indies in Montreal. Your new-to-the-business clients are damn lucky. I don't regret my path (and it was a different world when I started, before the internet, etc), but I also remember the first time I booked two hours with an indy. It was a game changer and showed me what fun the hobby can be!

urquell · Apr 3, 2025

From my standpoint the scene here in Montreal has become less and less appealing, with service generally going down, and prices and senses of entitlement shooting up. Of course there are ladies out there offering pleasant personalities and good service, but they seem to be harder to find, and from what I'm hearing many guys don't want to gamble on an unknown quantity when they're paying the current rates. The general feeling is that if you have people that you like to see and whose company you enjoy then why take an expensive chance on a complete unknown? Makes perfect sense. Some guys only want to gamble down market for that very reason. Of course, every guy also has a sense of curiousity and adventure, better developed in some than in others, and that never really goes away, but I think as people get older and more experienced (and possibly more cynical and jaded) that some of that sense of boyish wonder gives way to the practicalities involved. It's both sensible and mature, while at the same time being a little sad. Sometimes, the reason is even simpler. Sometimes it's just timing and phase in our lives during which the impulses wax and wane due to factors which may or may not have anything to do with the hobby. Some guys literally say "wait 3 months until you change your mind". People are strange and everybody's different, so maybe it's just a monger crap shoot. lol. Anyway, at the end of the day it doesn't really matter what the reasons are. You do whatever it is that makes you comfortable and happy. There really isn't a wrong answer in that sense.

Gazoo64 · Apr 3, 2025

I feel the same as @PSEfreak and @urquell .

I have a couple of favourites that I repeat with. I see them regularly, we have good chemistry, we know what each one likes, we have nice discussions as well, etc, so the whole experience is pleasant.

When I first started, I was seeing quite a few agency SPs, so I enjoyed the variety and meeting different ladies. Over time, the chemistry and familiarity became important for me. It takes time to build that relationship and over time, we became comfortable with each other (I know I did).

Sometimes these ladies also reach out to me when planning their week to inform me of their availabilities, so it is easier to plan appointments. I know how hard it can be to book some popular agency SPs, so it’s possible that I don’t have the time and patience for that anymore (checking schedule, texting for availabilities, schedules don’t align, etc).

Occasionally I’ll book a new lady that I never saw before just to make a change, or when the ones I see regularly are not available. I had some decent experiences, but for me, not as good as with the regulars that I see.

Anyway, to each their own. I guess there’s pros and cons with each approach and we all have different priorities and preferences.

T'storm · Apr 4, 2025

I echo what most of you guys are saying, I'm in the same position. I have been seeing the same lady for years now and we know what we like and don't like. Yes, I have tried different ladies to make a change, like redheads, tall, short(petite), spinners, Asian, black and I find that I do not get the same service as my ATF.

EastWind · Apr 12, 2025

LonelyFans and the other social media crap "killed" this hobby.

That is why you don't see the variety.

masterfreak · Apr 13, 2025

Très dangereux de rencontrer des nouvelles qui n'ont pas de review
Cet aspect du hobby c'est mort et enterré
Par contre en lisant les expériences de mes amis merbistes moi je trouve qu'il y a beaucoup de variété
Je manque de temps pour rencontrer celle qui m'intéresse

sweetlivia · Apr 14, 2025

I don’t know if a point of view from an SP is allowed here. As an escort, I do wish for regulars as well. You do run into the financial risk of disappointments that it is not met with expectations. It could be a bad analogy but you think that a 4-plus star restaurant that would cost over 100$ brings joy but it does not. And eating the average place brings me comfort food and there is the nostalgy of the first time. We always remember our first time, like you remember your first encounter and it fit like a glove. And I’ve been to a regular so often that she knows my order already. Food brings me joy, bad expectations sometimes enrage me for loosing time and money.

All this to say is that escorts do enjoy regulars too more than you believe. It’s that respectful and gentle client who treats you right that his wishes are fulfilled and it feels more than transactional. It’s a human connection and caring. It’s more than just leaving, it’s the sense of leaving someone and it has changed his sense of fulfillment and at this precise moment, that it touches me too.

lou67 · Tuesday at 7:55 AM

sweetlivia said:
I don’t know if a point of view from an SP is allowed here. As an escort, I do wish for regulars as well. You do run into the financial risk of disappointments that it is not met with expectations. It could be a bad analogy but you think that a 4-plus star restaurant that would cost over 100$ brings joy but it does not. And eating the average place brings me comfort food and there is the nostalgy of the first time. We always remember our first time, like you remember your first encounter and it fit like a glove. And I’ve been to a regular so often that she knows my order already. Food brings me joy, bad expectations sometimes enrage me for loosing time and money.

All this to say is that escorts do enjoy regulars too more than you believe. It’s that respectful and gentle client who treats you right that his wishes are fulfilled and it feels more than transactional. It’s a human connection and caring. It’s more than just leaving, it’s the sense of leaving someone and it has changed his sense of fulfillment and at this precise moment, that it touches me too.

I think it is a little off topic, the thread is about losing our mojo at the present time, for various reasons, that are to each his own reasons why.
But we all agree, regulars are more fun, and we appreciate the encounter much more, and safer than looking for a new SP, without the disappointment that comes with this, generally speaking !
My 2 cents on this topic.

NB: In no way I disapprove of your intervention.

sweetlivia · Tuesday at 12:52 PM

Yes, let’s talk about Mojo.

Maybe and it is only maybe, there is a certain stage in life where men just really want to settle (not relationship wise) and have that emotional comfort and sex is an add-on not a must-have. Men are in searched to be valued all their lives. Different stages in our lives, we move on what we need to feel valued for. Much like a podcast, I just listened to, we win and lose friends as we have different needs and it is ok.

I reconnected with a friend who, younger, would fuck anything, even a tree if he had to. He even to the point of having the intense swinging lifestyle. But now, he just enjoys the one-partner life and it is so unlike him. When asked, “He did all of it”, he said. There’s no search for the next wave. It does not mean that he has less sex drive, he just wants the meaningful sex with this one loved one.

Maybe the next one feels not as new anymore. For some, it’s like losing the fascinated kids within us and we have the feeling of I-have-seen-this experience and it’s not new, just different.

Lans · Saturday at 3:59 PM

I have similar experience to some of you guys. used to be 50% repeat 50% new girls. Now I'm mostly repeating. I'm still interested in variety. But dont know who to see. The Montreal market is hit or miss right now.
So this year, I'm doing something different. I'm spending less in Montreal and planning a trip to Europe. Hitting Amsterdam's red light first. Then' germany's FKK. It's gonna be a fun experience and i'm really excited about it. Most of my new girls for this year will be over there lol.

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