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I've had people line up for my fat ass on numerous occasions... because that's their thing. It's their jam. Please don't "yuck" other peoples' "yum".

Moobs just aren't my thing at all.

I'm just really into my avocado toast and 12 dollar lattes.

Thanks to a tip from an anonymous reader, here is my official new favourite band:

It really depends on a million different factors like where I have ads, or have refreshed my "online now", season, day of the week etc. There can really be dozens in a day or zero.

I don't calculate the percentage in order to keep sane. I respond to the vast majority of inquiries (everyone but the 4am "dispo?" guys). Yes, it's a red flag, but I tell myself that I'm a politician so I answer the question I wanted to be asked instead of the one I was actually asked. It...

Anatomically, you can see that a penis in an an asshole will directly rub against some of the same structures as it would in a vagina, it will also indirectly stimulate others. Shockingly, this can cause the sensation of pleasure, and even orgasms. When I've encountered lengthy dicks, I prefer...

Why do so many clients either not read my posted rates or not click through to my website where rates are posted and then text asking about rates?

I would like to be able to call myself a dick slapper, as a side hustle

Yeah, I think a condom is a difficult thing to "forget" but it's super easy to just try your luck while the lady is otherwise distracted. I've seen it happen and so I check every dick that heads in that direction either with my eyes or my fingers.