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After 10 years of membership, they show you the secret handshake.

I don’t know why they still bother to put speed limits signs all over the city ... there’s no way you drive faster than 30kmh without wrecking your fuckin car

Those fucking « évitons le gaspillage » stickers on packages at the grocery store. Bitch, don’t sell your 125 gr steak 27,54$ and lower it to a normal price and we will évite le gaspillage you fucktards !

Just discovered that the devil started a company called BuffBunny bodysuit to fuck with my mind.

Nah ... it’s not the way it works ...wives will suspect a gay lover and think you go there just to shower with guys. You can’t never win ...

Michelle Gunn in a few weeks

Bonne Swing-Valentin !

Ces 2 là devraient faire une interview ensemble à Pour une fois ... me semble leur voir la face :)

I saw a restaurant that offers special discounts. Bring your wife : 15% off Bring your girlfriend : 25% off Bring both : Free

Yes keep our borders secure but ... CBSA is a joke. They can’t detain immigrants because their Laval prison is not safe enough ... also, they only track people between monday to friday from 9am to 3pm ... So basically, if you are about to be deported, stay hidden until 3 pm on weekdays and you...

Woe nice shoes ! Wanna fuck?

Kangaroos.

I love it like « I would reincarnate into a women’s locker room bench »

J’ai entendu la vieille chanson « Coeur de loup » aujourd’hui à l’épicerie. J’avais jamais vraiment écouté attentivement les paroles ... finalement, c’est juste plein de belles paroles pour dire qu’il aime fourrer des filles pis pas les rappeler...

My biggest load spilling out

Candy version of the Grinch genitals

Alone. Then you’ll head straight to marde-a-lago?

I was around 8 or 9 years old and the door bell rang. I opened the door and a lady wearing a long fur coat and lots of make up was at the door and looking at me like « wooo WTF is that kid doing here ». My mom took over the situation and it turns out that she abviously rang at the wring door...

Until spring preferably

Ok... but i’ll still have 2 hot dogs, a medium fries and a sprite to go please.