Merry Christmas to everyone and Happy New Year. Best wishes to one and all. Peace, prosperity and love!
CA OUT!!!
CA OUT!!!
Merry Xmas everyone!
- Thread starter CockAsian69
- Start date
Joyeux Noël à Tout,
One Memorable Christmas
One memorable Christmas not so long ago
Santa did something that no one should know,
But all of the reindeer were standing about
And one of them blabbed so the story got out!
Of how a bit more than just Christmas cheer
Got into our dear old Santa that year!
According to Blitzen, (lead reindeer that Eve)
Santa was delivering at his usual speed,
They'd been going since nightfall and were making good time
When disaster struck at half past nine.
Santa entered a house at half nine or about
He entered it sober - but that's not how he came out!
As Santa was later heard to explain
The whole sorry event was on account of the pain -
He'd had in his head for most of the day -
That an aspirin had refused to make go away.
And his head was ready to explode by the time
His eyes alit upon that ruby port wine.
On a stool near the fireplace next to a mince pie
That bottle of port caught our Santa's eye.
And to clear up his headache he did what had to be done,
He poured out a glass full and downed it in one!
And after he'd emptied his sack of it's load
He decided he'd have just one more for the road!
It got later, and the reindeer outside in the street
Began to get restless and shuffle their feet.
Then Blitzen decided to investigate
Where Santa had gone and why the long wait.
Through the window he peeked - what a nasty surprise
There was Santa asleep next to the mince pies!
The bottle was empty, Santa snoring away
Blitzen knew that his job was to now save the day.
Whilst staying quite calm he told the other reindeer
That Santa was changing the roles 'round that year -
That the elves who were normally just there for the ride
Would now be allowed to deliver inside!
So off they all sped, they had time to make up
The elves rushed about not believing their luck.
What with so much to do, there was no time to think,
Whilst Santa sat dozing, dreamless from drink.
All went very smoothly and nobody saw
That it was elves and not Santa who came to the door!
Just before dawn they returned to the home
Where Santa was sleeping by the fire all alone.
Blitzen knocked on the window, Santa finally awoke
But once outside it was Blitzen who spoke.
"I did what you asked, Sir" he said with a wink,
"And the elves did a wonderful job don't you think?"
Santa was quick, in spite of his head
Which was throbbing again from the port, ruby red.
"Quite so, quite so," he repeated with cheer,
"I thought you should all get a chance this year
To show what you could do if an emergency arose-
I mean, if I fell ill or broke one of my toes!"
But much later on, once they were home
Santa waited 'til Blitzen was all on his own
And promised him solemnly that next time they were out
He'd drink only milk - of that there was no doubt.
Yes, it was much better, Blitzen agreed
If Santa was sober each Christmas Eve!
Perhaps you might wonder, now the story is done,
How is it that I know just what went on?
Well, I once met a reindeer up on the hill
And I invited him in from the frosty night chill.
And Blitzen was so cold that after a time
I offered him a big glass of ruby port wine!
Copyright; Catherine Grieshammer
Christmas Cheers,
Merlot
One Memorable Christmas
One memorable Christmas not so long ago
Santa did something that no one should know,
But all of the reindeer were standing about
And one of them blabbed so the story got out!
Of how a bit more than just Christmas cheer
Got into our dear old Santa that year!
According to Blitzen, (lead reindeer that Eve)
Santa was delivering at his usual speed,
They'd been going since nightfall and were making good time
When disaster struck at half past nine.
Santa entered a house at half nine or about
He entered it sober - but that's not how he came out!
As Santa was later heard to explain
The whole sorry event was on account of the pain -
He'd had in his head for most of the day -
That an aspirin had refused to make go away.
And his head was ready to explode by the time
His eyes alit upon that ruby port wine.
On a stool near the fireplace next to a mince pie
That bottle of port caught our Santa's eye.
And to clear up his headache he did what had to be done,
He poured out a glass full and downed it in one!
And after he'd emptied his sack of it's load
He decided he'd have just one more for the road!
It got later, and the reindeer outside in the street
Began to get restless and shuffle their feet.
Then Blitzen decided to investigate
Where Santa had gone and why the long wait.
Through the window he peeked - what a nasty surprise
There was Santa asleep next to the mince pies!
The bottle was empty, Santa snoring away
Blitzen knew that his job was to now save the day.
Whilst staying quite calm he told the other reindeer
That Santa was changing the roles 'round that year -
That the elves who were normally just there for the ride
Would now be allowed to deliver inside!
So off they all sped, they had time to make up
The elves rushed about not believing their luck.
What with so much to do, there was no time to think,
Whilst Santa sat dozing, dreamless from drink.
All went very smoothly and nobody saw
That it was elves and not Santa who came to the door!
Just before dawn they returned to the home
Where Santa was sleeping by the fire all alone.
Blitzen knocked on the window, Santa finally awoke
But once outside it was Blitzen who spoke.
"I did what you asked, Sir" he said with a wink,
"And the elves did a wonderful job don't you think?"
Santa was quick, in spite of his head
Which was throbbing again from the port, ruby red.
"Quite so, quite so," he repeated with cheer,
"I thought you should all get a chance this year
To show what you could do if an emergency arose-
I mean, if I fell ill or broke one of my toes!"
But much later on, once they were home
Santa waited 'til Blitzen was all on his own
And promised him solemnly that next time they were out
He'd drink only milk - of that there was no doubt.
Yes, it was much better, Blitzen agreed
If Santa was sober each Christmas Eve!
Perhaps you might wonder, now the story is done,
How is it that I know just what went on?
Well, I once met a reindeer up on the hill
And I invited him in from the frosty night chill.
And Blitzen was so cold that after a time
I offered him a big glass of ruby port wine!
Copyright; Catherine Grieshammer
Christmas Cheers,
Merlot
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