What if Your daughter became a Pornstar/Escort?

[YouVantOption]

Laurence Fishburne's Daughter -- Porn Star
http://www.tmz.com/2010/07/30/laurence-fishburne-daughter-porn-star-xxx-montana-vivid/

Daddy Laurence must be so proud. How would members here react to a family member doing a porn tape? Announcing or discovering they are in the sex trade?

 

[albacore]

The TMZ comments say it all. Morpheus doesn't look pleased ...

 

[YouVantOption]

The TMZ comments say it all. Morpheus doesn't look pleased ...

Her celebrity hero is someone who released a tape of herself being pissed on (one of the Kardashian no-talents, they are now pimping out their 12 year-old scion) to promote her 'reality' show. How sad is that? I don't know who Morpheus is but this has got to tear her father's guts out.

So, again, for all who profess the sex trade is good and normal - what would you think if your daughter, sister, mother did a sex tape or became an escort? For the escorts, have you told your father? I'm thinking that a lot of what is held here as a philosophy fails in real life, perhaps not all of the time.

There is an Intelligence Squared debate on the morality of the sex trade (I think it is called 'be it resolved: it is wrong to pay for sex') I'd like to see. I'm all for legalization of the sex trade to drive the pimps and organized crime scum out of it, and honestly while I sure wouldn't enjoy seeing a relative suck a 10" dick, I do like watching porn, and that hottie is somebody's sister and daughter. The morality around this is judeo-christian, and it is time to get over archaic mores and move on. The human body is a thing of beauty, we all have one, and we pretty much all fuck (six billion pieces of proof to be believed).

So - how would you feel. Clearly, I hold a duplicitous view on the matter, which i can't resolve.

 

[shijak]

I don't know who Morpheus is but this has got to tear her father's guts out.

Morpheus is probably Lawrence Fishburne's best-known film character from the MATRIX trilogy of films (I"m surprised I even had to explain that)

 

[hungry101]

This is a great thread. I too believe that there is nothing wrong with prostitution and that it should be legal everywhere. I would like to add one dimension. I would be ashamed to go public with the information that I occasionally procure the services of said prostitutes. Actually, in real life I am quite vocal about my feelings about the legalization of prostitution (as well as drugs etc.) but I always stop short of saying that I visit SPs. I am not proud of this addiction of mine. I do go on web sites like this and other sexual web sites and I applaud the merits of prostitution under one of several assumed names. BTW, you should see how people on these sex sites jump all over my shit when I mention my proclivity towards SPs. "This is wrong" they say. I am abusing woman (Really? I am the one who is broke at the end of the month etc) and I am cheating on my sig other. Well if she put out I wouldn't be here....as much.

The point is that this is a shady business and I can't resolve this even with myself.

 

[johnmbot]

> What if Your daughter became a Pornstar/Escort?

wouldn`t bother me at all as long as the decision was made by her alone.

 

[Merlot]

Hello all,

After a while she may find she is not turned on by the guys , she'll do it for the money and will turn or reveal herself being lesbian. This is common in this industry where sex is trade for money. The sex trade is a world of no afffection , no emotion , only count is beauty beauty beauty , money money money . Sex trade is a game where most of "actors" loose .

To answer the emotional element you brought up, you are referring superficially to the sex act. In that case there is some significant truth in what you say much of the time. However, in fact, involvement in the hobby is loaded with emotions of all kinds that reach out in every direction. And, in many cases there are clients at least who become emotionally attached to an escort. I am certain every person who has been in the hobby any significant length of time has had some level of emotional involvement and/or attachment with at least one escort and probably more at some varying level. So your statement is superficial only, more a reflection of skepticism than reality. But also, the idea that no escort ever got emotionally involved only reflects a skeptical perspective. People are people. Even an escort can't possibly turn off feelings all of the time.

I have seen a lot of escorts over the years and most of them are very decent people and they all deserve to be treated in a respectful way but i don't think anybody in there right mind would want there daughter to be an escort. If i had a daughter and found out she was an escort or porn star i would do everything in my power to get her to stop right away.

Well, in my general mindset I would tend to agree with you. I would be determined to get any daughter of mine (have none) out of escorting. But, others just don't share the more typical views. For example, it is well known that Tom, the former owner of the old Heartbreakers agency and current owner of the other board, did employ both his wife and daughter as escorts. Why that choice was made would be very interesting to read.

This is a great thread. I too believe that there is nothing wrong with prostitution and that it should be legal everywhere. I would like to add one dimension. I would be ashamed to go public with the information that I occasionally procure the services of said prostitutes. Actually, in real life I am quite vocal about my feelings about the legalization of prostitution (as well as drugs etc.) but I always stop short of saying that I visit SPs. I am not proud of this addiction of mine. I do go on web sites like this and other sexual web sites and I applaud the merits of prostitution under one of several assumed names. BTW, you should see how people on these sex sites jump all over my shit when I mention my proclivity towards SPs. "This is wrong" they say. I am abusing woman (Really? I am the one who is broke at the end of the month etc) and I am cheating on my sig other. Well if she put out I wouldn't be here....as much.

The point is that this is a shady business and I can't resolve this even with myself.

Your statement in bold also reflects my view. As for the rest, I am very ambivalent about legalizing prostitution: the right of a stable freely choosing individual to choose (this is a loose definition to separate those who make a free rationale choice from those of desperation or coercion or force) versus all the negatives that are involved in the business. I generally do not support the legalization of drugs, except marijuana in a very limited way. But it is amusing how so many people can cheat, lie, steal, and so much more then get self-righteous about "the hobby".

Cheers,

Merlot

 

[Mod 11]

Back to topic please?

 

[anon_vlad]

I would hope that she would make enough money to satisfy herself without having to work as such. I would like to see her establish herself in a field in which she progresses - which has an upside as she ages. I think that a father should provide for, at a minimum, the essentials of life for his daughter. If had a daughter, I wouldn't want her to prostitute herself for luxuries.

Even under the best possible conditions for SPs, I believe that the enjoyment of sex diminishes as the total number of clients increases. She would be eliminated from consideration for a loving relationship by most young men and probably lose many of her female friends.

SPs have told me that their fathers didn't support them. I would be sorry for my daughter and consider it a failure on my part if she worked in the sex trade.

I don't believe that it is hypocrisy to employ SPs and not want my daughter to be one. I sometimes eat at McDonald's, but wouldn't want her to have a McJob either.

 

[vtguy]

When you eat the McD hamburger you're not harming anyone. By your viewpoint, it's damaging to the SP to be a SP so hiring one damages them, so what you're doing contributes directly to the problem. This seems contradictory and not a good analogy. Personally, it sounds like everyone here's talking about 19 year olds. After a certain age, I don't see why there would be so much concern, and at least in Montreal I don't think there's as much stigma as everyone in this thread seems to attach to this trade. As well, if a woman goes into this with a clear mind, I don't agree that it's necessarily damaging, but of course it could be. I personally think prostitution should be a regular trade like anything else, schools for it and everything. It's a part of most cultures so why keep this attitude that it's shady or underground business? I know it often is, but it shouldn't be.

 

[Jman47]

Hello all,

I have been watching this tread develop and find the topic to be intriguing. The opinions to date are interesting. I would like to comment on a few while skirting the question for now...

Reciprocity is non existing.

Let's stay on the topic of this thread and not hijacking it.

So by saying reciprocity is non existing, are you implying that an escort is not human and not capable of human feelings and emotions...? I would agree that it is much easier for a client to have or develop an emotional involvement but to just say without hesitation that there could be no reciprocity...well unless you are a robot, that just cannot be true.

This is a great thread. I too believe that there is nothing wrong with prostitution and that it should be legal everywhere. I would like to add one dimension. I would be ashamed to go public with the information that I occasionally procure the services of said prostitutes. Actually, in real life I am quite vocal about my feelings about the legalization of prostitution (as well as drugs etc.) but I always stop short of saying that I visit SPs. I am not proud of this addiction of mine. I do go on web sites like this and other sexual web sites and I applaud the merits of prostitution under one of several assumed names. BTW, you should see how people on these sex sites jump all over my shit when I mention my proclivity towards SPs. "This is wrong" they say. I am abusing woman (Really? I am the one who is broke at the end of the month etc) and I am cheating on my sig other. Well if she put out I wouldn't be here....as much.

The point is that this is a shady business and I can't resolve this even with myself.

I happen to agree with your view which as Merlot said is bold. There are many things that should be legalized that as a society we secretly accept if they are kept quiet while adopting a public societal view of the activity being unacceptable - i.e. prostitution and marijuana. Thus the reason we with our views are kept in the closet per se because we fear the "moral majority".
I too wrestle with personal resolution for many reasons but as I mature and realize that the days ahead of me are fewer than the days behind me I resolve to live life to the fullest while fulfilling any obligations I may have.

I had several conversations with my favourite escort about this very topic.
I had known her for several years and over a hundred dinner dates, so our discussions were open and honest and no subject was taboo.
Her life as an escort over a 5 year period was filled with adventure, shopping trips to Paris and London. Partying with celebrities and sport stars all over the world, and cruises in private yachts on the Med and off Florida.
Her father, a very wealthy man, was supporting her so she didn`t have to be an escort....she wanted to be one for the thrill and glamour..... and independence from her dad.

I asked he if she had any regrets about her career choice. She said no and would do it all again , although some things differently.

Then I asked her if she`d want her daughter to become an escort. Her answere was an emphatic NO.

What I find interesting is the ending reaction that even though the lady would repeat her career choice she without hesitation says "NO" she would not want her daughter to do the same thing...one could view this from many angles. Mine is simple - perhaps she just wants what so many of us do - for our children to just have things a little better that we did and hence her reaction. I am in a business profession which is honorable and earns a decent buck, but I would give the same answer if asked (if I would want my kids to do it) because it seems we always want something different for our children. Perhaps it is just by nature that we live forward vicariously through them.


Now to the original question which I have avoided. No...I would not want my daughter to be an escort under current conditions and with the current laws. Its funny because when I was younger I would always say, "if I were a hot chick, I would be the biggest gold digging whore there was..." LOL. At the time I said that it was from a very limited view and with a very limited exposure to the business of sex. Over the years I have had lets just say allot of exposure and along the way made some friends, made some mistakes and learned many things. While the money could be easy to earn and could be earned quickly and there are true professionals of the trade...don't fool yourself, many of these sex workers pay a price in emotional, mental and physical tolls. It's a very tough business.

Take care,

Jman

 

[anon_vlad]

When you eat the McD hamburger you're not harming anyone. By your viewpoint, it's damaging to the SP to be a SP so hiring one damages them, so what you're doing contributes directly to the problem. This seems contradictory and not a good analogy. Personally, it sounds like everyone here's talking about 19 year olds. After a certain age, I don't see why there would be so much concern, and at least in Montreal I don't think there's as much stigma as everyone in this thread seems to attach to this trade. As well, if a woman goes into this with a clear mind, I don't agree that it's necessarily damaging, but of course it could be. I personally think prostitution should be a regular trade like anything else, schools for it and everything. It's a part of most cultures so why keep this attitude that it's shady or underground business? I know it often is, but it shouldn't be.

As for eating the McD hamburger, I am damaging the planet more than if my diet was vegetarian. Also, I should patronize only restaurants whose servers make a decent wage. In fact, it could be argued that almost anything one does damages someone.

Call it rationalization if you wish: I try to minimize the damage by treating an SP well and don't believe that, as one of her thousand clients for the year, that I am damaging her all that much. But yes, as a consumer of prostitution, I am part of the problem. I don't pretend to lead a blameless life.

I wish that prostitution was a regular, respected trade, but it isn't and doubt that it ever will be here. In today's reality, I wouldn't want my daughter to be an SP.

 

[johnmbot]

Most of the girls i know who have (or have) sugar daddys have told me they hate the fact they are or have been sps. Absolutely hate it & get filled with jealousy about it.

that is indeed the answer you would get from ~95% of x-sex workers.

over a 2 year period i had about 200 strippers & escorts working for me (not all at once thank god). you can't help but end up dating & living with a few (sometimes all at once, heh heh) and this is what i saw...

her age doesn't really matter. the important factors for exiting the biz successfully depend on her frame of mind and the purpose for getting into it. but more importantly, what were her circumstances for quitting.

if she entered into the biz to use it as a means to an end, and finally quit when her goal (finishing university, saving for a business, etc.) was met, she'll be fine for the most part.

if she entered the biz out of desperation/survival (which 95% of them do), realized down the line she better have an exit plan, stuck to it, then quit when she reached her goal, she will be ok... relative to her peers.

it wouldn't make a difference why she started stripping/escorting if she gets sucked into the money/drugs/quasi-empowerment/etc. facade. the ending is never good.

the above also applies to girls that return to the biz, in other words, 'why is she coming back?' you will rarely leave the biz better off than you entered it.

the joy or hatred of any job is rooted in the reasons for taking the job.

 

[hungry101]

> What if Your daughter became a Pornstar/Escort?

wouldn`t bother me at all as long as the decision was made by her alone.

Really? Do you really believe this? Wouldn`t your rather see your daughter become a physician, a nurse or an engineer. These are more sustainable professions for sure but when a friend or family member asks how`s little Lizzy wouldn`t you rather answer "Oh she`s great. She is a 9th grade math teacher." I wouldn`t want my kids on the front lines of Iraq or any battleground but this would be a more honorable profession. Whether you think the cause is moral or immoral is not the point. It would certainly be more honorable to proclaim that your daughter is serving in the armed forces which protect this country rather than to say she is an intimacy consultant. As an SP wouldn`t you worry that she is needlessly exposing herself to sexual disease with a dozen different partners a week? I know the rubber has broke for me a couple of times. If I did this a dozen times a week rather than a dozen times a year I would probably have caught something by now. Wouldn`t you be worried that someone would coerce her into doing something she wouldn`t rather do and by doing this a few times it would become no big deal and she would consider it commonplace? Wouldn`t you worry that she would be manipulated and abused by an agency owner that makes her sleep for top billing or that she will meet that client that gets off on getting rough with her and beats her up or worse? Are you not afraid that she will become dependent on the fast cash and not have the discipline to start a sustainable career? Are you worried about drugs etc? Wouldn`t you worry about her getting busted at an incall or going over to the states and having a felony on her record. There is so much more...The list goes on and on. Don`t you want to go to bed at night knowing that she is home safe in her house with a sustainable career and that you hope she will provide you with a grandchild to spoil that she will raise to be a good citizen?

Listen, I am no better than anyone else on this board or any SP. No one has a daughter and hopes that she may someday become the most requested SP at Eleganza. This is never going to change in our lifetime. This is just the way it is. As I said I am addicted and I wouldn`t want my son to follow in my footsteps either. I would rather my daughter become an honest fry cook than become an SP. I`m just sayin....

 

[daydreamer41]

I would hope that she would make enough money to satisfy herself without having to work as such. I would like to see her establish herself in a field in which she progresses - which has an upside as she ages. I think that a father should provide for, at a minimum, the essentials of life for his daughter. If had a daughter, I wouldn't want her to prostitute herself for luxuries.

Even under the best possible conditions for SPs, I believe that the enjoyment of sex diminishes as the total number of clients increases. She would be eliminated from consideration for a loving relationship by most young men and probably lose many of her female friends.

SPs have told me that their fathers didn't support them. I would be sorry for my daughter and consider it a failure on my part if she worked in the sex trade.

I don't believe that it is hypocrisy to employ SPs and not want my daughter to be one. I sometimes eat at McDonald's, but wouldn't want her to have a McJob either.

I agree with your general sentiments. However, I have met 2 SP's who were in their late 20s (this was 20 years ago) who turned to SPing because they had enough of the business world working and used the SP profession as a rest stop. They intended to find another career, but they needed to pay their bills while thinking of what they wanted to do next. I liked both of these women. I could have had a relationship with either one of them, but that is another story. So it is not always the case that women want to live the luxurious life and they turn to SPing.

I have also met some SP;s in Montreal who have plans for businesses they want to open. They are saving up money so they can finance their ideas.

Of course, if you are a parent of a young woman, you would not want her to something that has stigma, or could be dangerous. You would want her to be the best she could be. But this revenue source is available to women. Some choose it. Some do it temporarily. Some longer term. Some would never do it. Some see it as a way to a means. Some enjoy it. Some do it because they are need money and that's the only reason they do it.

 

[Dauphin]

There is an Intelligence Squared debate on the morality of the sex trade (I think it is called `be it resolved: it is wrong to pay for sex`) I`d like to see. I`m all for legalization of the sex trade to drive the pimps and organized crime scum out of it, and honestly while I sure wouldn`t enjoy seeing a relative suck a 10`` dick, I do like watching porn, and that hottie is somebody`s sister and daughter. The morality around this is judeo-christian, and it is time to get over archaic mores and move on. The human body is a thing of beauty, we all have one, and we pretty much all fuck (six billion pieces of proof to be believed).

If there is a truth in this matter, I believe your comment comes closest to it of all I`ve read to date. Dont our companions define themselves as Sex Workers ? There is a contract, there is an agreement. Do we need more ?

 

[johnmbot]

Really? Do you really believe this?

yes.

No one has a daughter and hopes that she may someday become the most requested SP at Eleganza.

a decision like this doesn't happen overnight. raising my daughter from the day she was born until the day she decides what she wants to do with her life will play a major part in the goals she sets for herself. if those first 18 years leads to her to want to be a pornstar/escort, well then, it's out of my hands at that point. blame me 100% for her failures, and give me 50% credit for her successes.

h101, would it make a difference if your daughter made the decision when she was 25? 30? 35? 40? shit happens. you never know what you might have to do, or even want to do later in life.

 

[Aeolus]

I'm going to preface my response by stating that I've met a number of wonderful escorts and that I, by no means, think I'm any different or any better (or any worse) than they are.

With that said, if I had a daughter (I have no kids) and I learned that she were an escort, I'd feel sad, ashamed, disgusted, and enraged. I'd ask her, WTF? If I learned that someone had manipulated her into living that type of lifestyle (i.e. by getting her hooked on drugs or by physically coercing her), I'd track that person down and kill him. No one would hurt my daughter and get away with it. If, on the other hand, my daughter freely chose that line of work, having a sober mind and independent spirit, then I guess I'd have to begrudgingly resign myself to that fact. People have a right to do what they want with their own bodies.

I don't find my position on this issue to be in conflict with my use of escorts, though, because I'm not a dad. I was never picked to be a dad. Had a long-term, loving relationship with a woman who wanted me to father her child been in the cards for me, then I would have never started seeing escorts in the first place. Circumstances in my life just sort of pushed me toward hobbying, just like circumstances in the lives of certain women push them toward turning tricks. I'm not proud of what I do, but I'm also not ashamed of it either. After all, the relationship between client and SP is mutually exploitative for individual benefit. I can tell you that all the SPs who see me essentially take advantage of the fact that I'm willing to temporarily alleviate my loneliness and depression with a quick fix of commercial company. I don't think any one of them has lost sleep over the fact that I utilized her services because my life isn't going all that great. They capitatalize on my personal issues, just as I capitalize on their personal issues. They're getting paid because aspects of my life suck, and I'm getting laid because aspects of their lives suck. It's not ideal, but that's the world we live in. At the end of the day, their attention brings a little joy to my life and hopefully my money brings a little joy to theirs.

 

[master_bates]

I wouldnt be happy and try to get her to quit but if she was over 18 the decision at the end is hers.

 

[master_bates]

What if your daughter was a pornstar (spin off)

What if your daughter did porn?

Would you watch her movies/scenes?