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Thread: How to golddig...

  1. #1

    How to golddig...


    Cash advance

    By Josey Vogels

    C'mon admit it, you've thought about it. Find yourself a nice rich guy, settle down, never cook again...

    Well, if you think marrying rich is the easy way out, you should talk to Ginie Sayles. She's worked her whole life at it, though it's paid off, quite literally. Sayles has been happily married to a millionaire for 14 years and now makes a hefty living teaching the art of golddigging through her books and seminars, How to the Marry the Rich.

    Sign me up, I say. Except I'd look ridiculous in an Ivana Trump-style power suit.

    "You want a sophisticated, sexy look," advises Sayles over the phone in her friendly, straight-shooting Texan drawl. "Ivana-style outfits that are body conscious but not tight in solid, bright colours, rather than patterns. Also, dangly gold or silver earrings so they catch the light and draw attention to your face."

    Guys can get away with a more unique look, says Sayles - long hair, maybe even an earring - but a conservative appearance works best to attract the rich babes.

    Growing up poor in a small town in West Texas, Sayles first knew she wanted to live the good life at age nine, when a local rich girl befriended her and took her swimming at her parents' country club. "We ordered fried shrimp on her daddy's account," remembers Sayles. "I didn't even know what fried shrimp was. I felt inferior and I didn't like it. I realized then the only difference between me and this girl was the knowledge and experience money buys."

    She wanted in. "Dating boys with money became my education system," she laughs. "I learned about being rich from them. I always made them take me to restaurants I hadn't eaten at, and I'd order things on the menu I hadn't tried just to learn about them."

    After a failed marriage (not into money), a daughter and a college education she scraped together on welfare and student loans, she decided it was time to marry a doctor. That was when marrying a doctor still carried some weight. That didn't last either.

    She was tired. A very wealthy, no, make that, an extremely wealthy, married man came to her rescue. As his mistress, he put her up in a beautiful, fully loaded ("I had a seven-foot suede couch") place. For someone determined to marry rich, Sayles describes her experience as a kept woman as "the perfect training ground."

    Her family was appalled. But she was thrilled. "I never, ever felt bad about it," says Sayles. "This man was more than a lover and a Santa Claus, he was a mentor."

    In fact, she learned enough about stocks and investments from him to later become a stockbroker.

    "Becoming a stockbroker was the best dating service for rich men I ever had," she laughs again. But you don't have to become a stockbroker to meet rich men. "Go to lunch in the financial districts," Sayles advises. "But go early. The rich control their time, and do lunch at 11:30 to avoid the rush."

    Or find a job that will put you in contact with rich people. Like a receptionist at a brokerage firm for example. Or a journalist. "That's the best job for meeting rich people," Sayles tells me a little too enthusiastically. "Pick your person, find out if they're single and do a story on them so you can interview them. Ernest Hemingway divorced his wife to marry a magazine journalist who interviewed him. And Clint Eastwood is married to a TV journalist."

    She's obviously egging me on.

    Unfortunately, I tell her, my book would more likely be called How to Marry the Poor, and right now I'm happily attached to an, um, emotionally rich man.

    But don't let that stop the rest of you.

    Other suggestions from Sayles include:
    • Getting involved in political parties to meet future movers and shakers;
    • Going to bars in five-star hotels for happy hour;
    • Working as a hostess in a posh or exclusive restaurant; (Yes, she's done it.)
    • Moving into a rich neighbourhood even if it means you have to live in a shoe box of an apartment held together by gum and spit. (Yup, she's done that one too.)
    "Psychologists have shown that the majority of the people will end up marrying someone who lives within 16 blocks from them," says Sayles. So, if you don't mind marrying someone who lives within your decrepit 16 blocks, stay put, but if you want to meet the rich, she says, "find three areas you would like to marry into and move as close as you can."

    Excuse me, but isn't this all a teensy bit calculating?

    "Oh it is, but so are career moves," Sayles flips back.

    Whatever happened to marrying for love?

    "I think love is great, it's a gift, it's gravy," she says. "But think about it. Divorce rates are close to 50 per cent. Probably at least 90 per cent of these couples thought they married for love, so if love only has a 50 per cent track record maybe we should take a look at other viable reasons to marry."


    As for people who fault others for marrying money instead of earning it themselves, Sayles is equally frank. "When you've married a rich guy, you have earned it yourself," she says. "And besides, the idea is to marry someone rich to become who you are better not to become less. One guy I met expected me to be a social extension of him. That is totally unacceptable to me."

    Unless, maybe you're one of those young things you see on the arms of rich, old men. "I say, if you are a trophy, maximize it while you can, put it in the bank," says Sayles. "Usually if you see the young bimbo and the dirty old man, it's mutual exploitation."

    Men make up 30 per cent of her clientele, though admittedly, many of these are rich men looking for women who have learned how to handle a rich guy. Poor men have a harder time marrying rich women, she says, because men say, "Sure, I want a woman with money, but I want her to be a babe!"

    "Women are brought up to look beyond the physical. They are also more stimulated by sound and touch than they are by sight... and money feels good!"

    But what about that old "money not being able to buy you happiness" thing?

    "Yeah well, poverty doesn't buy it either," she strikes back. "It depends on where you are in your life and what you need most. If what you need most is love, go for it, but if someone has been suffering financially for a long time, and love has really let them down, and a rich, kind and generous [her three requirements] person comes along, you'd be amazed how lovable they are."

    Besides, as she's been saying since she started this whole gig back in 1987, "The rich will marry somebody, why not you?"

    I'm off to the Ritz for happy hour.
    Amantes sunt amentes.

  2. #2

    Craiglist ad

    Also, as has been discussed in this thread (but the link is down so I`m reproducing it here).

    Woman posts ad on Craigslist:
    What am I doing wrong?

    Okay, I’m tired of beating around the bush. I’m a beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25-year-old girl. I’m articulate and classy. I’m not from New York. I’m looking to get married to a guy who makes at least [a] half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don’t think I’m overreaching at all.

    Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could you send me some tips? I dated a businessman who makes average around 200 - 250K. But that’s where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000K won’t get me to Central Park West. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she’s not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level?

    Here are my questions specifically:

    - Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars, restaurants, gyms.

    - What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won’t hurt my feelings.

    - Is there an age range I should be targeting (I’m 25)?

    - Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the Upper East Side so plain? I’ve seen really “plain Jane” boring types who have nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I’ve seen drop dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the East Village. What’s the story there?

    - Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows — lawyer, investment banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?

    - How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for MARRIAGE ONLY.

    Please hold your insults — I’m putting myself out there in an honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I’m being up front about it. I wouldn’t be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn’t able to match them — in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and hearth.

    And got this response:
    Dear Pers-431649184:

    I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament. Firstly, I’m not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said, here’s how I see it:

    Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a crappy business deal. Here’s why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party, and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here’s the rub — your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity … in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won’t be getting any more beautiful!

    So, in economic terms, you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain: you’re 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35, stick a fork in you!

    So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold … hence the rub … marriage. It doesn’t make good business sense to “buy you” (which is what you’re asking) so I’d rather lease. In case you think I’m being cruel, I would say the following: if my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It’s as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

    Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as “articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful” as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to believe, if you are as gorgeous as you say you are, that the $500K hasn’t found you, if not only for a tryout. By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn’t need to have this difficult conversation.

    With all that said, I must say you’re going about it the right way. Classic “pump and dump.” I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, let me know.
    Amantes sunt amentes.

  3. #3
    I am me, too!
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    If only I knew...
    I just love that guy's answer!!

  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by Agrippa
    It doesn’t make good business sense to “buy you” (which is what you’re asking) so I’d rather lease.
    Somewhere on these boards at one time some wise man said:

    If it flies, floats or fucks, it's cheaper to lease.

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