I used to have a Merb account back in the day to check out the ads but I deleted it. This ''debate'' made me want to get involved again, it took me back to a certain era of my life. I'm in my late 40's and have been seeing SP for the last 10 years since a really tough breakup. When I was in my 20s in the 2000s I was pretty wild, I went to raves, goth clubs, kink events and all that stuff. I partied pretty hard and one of my first girlfriends became an escort. She was bipolar and couldn't maintain a normal job more than a few months. When she was manic she would work for an outcall agency many days a week.. at first it was cool, we had money to go on road trips and party more, but pretty fast I realized the job wasn't as glamorous as she told her friends it was. She was bulimic and started using a lot of coke to lose weight, one client slapped her in the face so hard that she had a bruise for an entire week. I had to break up with her. She was hospitalized and went to rehab and was good for a while, then she moved away from Montreal. I didn't hear from her again until 5 years later in Toronto where she was working as an indy. She was still using once in a while but she looked much happier.
I never had trouble getting girlfriends and hookups, I'm involved in the cultural and entertainment scenes and I am pretty good looking, even now at my age. I just got exhausted of having one night stands with girls I'd meet at bars and have to deal with the aftermath. I was also too heart broken after a really long relationship, and I didn't know what I wanted. In 2015 one guy I worked with saw escorts on a regular basis and bragged to the whole team about it. This guy was pretty famous in our scene but he was totally sex obsessed, always wanted to take us to strip clubs after work and so on. It's because of that guy that I decided to try escort agencies, he said the same thing a lot of guys in this discussion said, he told us these girls love what they do. I told him about my ex he said no no, things have changed, try these places, the girls are well paid and well treated and all of this.
Hey to each his own but I only booked indies now. I tried both outcall and incall agencies, probably 5 times and most of these experiences were not really what I was hoping for. I know what it looks like when someone's high, half of these girls were so strung out on coke. I remember one girl told me not to follow her to the bathroom, and I asked her if guys often did that, she said yes. I realized this was also not what I was looking for, it felt impersonal and strange to me. One girl had been crying, god knows what happened before I got there, she started kissing me but I just couldn't get turned on. I have no trouble believing these women were being exploited.
There was one girl I have a fond memory of that I met at an agency, it was the one time I decided to book longer than an hour. She invited me over for dinner and I was really surprised, I hesitated. After a couple drinks she started crying and told me she absolutely hated it there, shared similar stories that have been mentioned here.. She admitted to me that she and other girls tried to hang out with their clients after their shifts so they could see them independently, I felt like shit and gave her some money for her time but declined seeing her after. So yep none of this is surprising to me. I know a few women who used to be in this industry, some my age some younger. If I thought seeing sex workers was a horrible thing I wouldn't be doing it, but i keep in mind what these women and what the SP I see have told me when indulging. Yeah the sex is important but to me what I love the most about meeting escorts is getting to know a beautiful woman and having a good time with her without the responsibility and possible heartache of a relationship