awkward, 28, lack of experience, should I hire a sex coach?

[Abathur]

I am two months away from 29, it's embarrassing for me to say, I have very little sexual experience which is hard for other people to understand because around my age, people usually have multiple girlfriends and have at least hundreds if not thousands of encounters.

There are many reasons, but the most obvious one is I was 70% blind before the age of 17, I went through an eye surgery in senior high to resolve it. my eye condition in childhood and teenage years really got to me, I was lacking so many experiences in life, I was emotionally sensitive and struggled through college and professional life.

I did try to go out with a few girls my age in the past, I told them about my situation, but they were looking for someone whom they can have fun with both emotionally and physically.

I went into 2 half-hour incalls, I was shy and clumsy, a bit clueless, the ladies were a bit annoyed by my lack of experience so overall, the experience was not that enjoyable.

just like everything in life, I understand the only way to get through this awkwardness and shyness is through practicing, things would definitely get better, continuing these hh sessions seem like a viable option? the minimal cost for a hh session is 160$ in my areas, I probably need around 30-50 encounters, was wondering do we have ways to lower the cost a bit? or do you guys have other suggestions ?

 

[LeafsSuck]

We can probably lower this to 5-10 sessions. Before the encounter tell the lady the situation and ask her if she could coach you through it, if she can then great, if she cannot, call the next one. All ladies are different but there is some general ground so start with 5-10 different ladies. Good luck and have fun!

 

[What's My Name]

Yeah LeafsSuck is right, inform the ladies. I am partially blind, and I let the ladies know and alot of them are very helpful and cool, but there are some that do not want to see handicapped people, their choice

 

[Fradi]

Perhaps you are going about this all wrong.
It is never about the amount of girls you are going to see but who you see and how good they are at their profession, the really good ones will make you feel at ease and awkwardness and being nervous is nothing new to them.

First you are obviously not selecting the right companions if they get annoyed because you are awkward and inexperienced.
They are supposed to be professionals who know how to deal with that and make you feel comfortable.
This kind of relates back to your approach also, in my opinion trying multiple half hour sessions at $160 is not doing yourself a favour or giving you the opportunity to be with the right kind of SP.

Try picking out an SP from the agencies or Indies reviewed here on Merb.
Book a minimum one hour session with a well reviewed lady in the range of $250-$350 you will be amazed at the difference.
You will not be rushed, you will be with a lady who is professional, someone who will take her time make you feel at ease and will rock your world.
You want a good experience you don’t start with trying to spend as little as possible and cram it into the shortest time frame.
That is good for emptying your balls in my opinion and takes a special kind of person to be into that there are some for sure that are fine with that as we are all different.

 

[Flyingby]

Go see sonia von sacher
Thank me later

 

[sene5hos]

I would like to help you, I didn't have an official coach but it was just like. I started with erotic masseuses, I thought it would be easier. And indeed they helped me.

If you prefer to meet escorts, I strongly advise you to meet women who advertise themselves on this site. It's certain that you will have to pay a little more, but tell yourself that it will have been well invested.

And again, do your personal research, you choose several and you communicate with them, and according to their answers you will decide. You are the best person for this.

 

[Abathur]

thank you guys for all your wonderful suggestions

I am not blind anymore after the surgery.

To be honest, I am at least for now, less into the pleasure but more into gaining the experience, I am planning to find a regular girlfriend and get married once I get over this awkward phase.

with the last two ladies, I was slow and last around 5-10 mins, seems awkward to book a one-hour session as what am I going to do with the rest of the time?

so it's better to call a well-reviewed escort from an agency, and try to avoid ladies from leolist?

 

[Abathur]

I would like to help you, I didn't have an official coach but it was just like. I started with erotic masseuses, I thought it would be easier. And indeed they helped me.

If you prefer to meet escorts, I strongly advise you to meet women who advertise themselves on this site. It's certain that you will have to pay a little more, but tell yourself that it will have been well invested.

And again, do your personal research, you choose several and you communicate with them, and according to their answers, you will decide. You are the best person for this.

I am living in DT, do you have any decent Massage Parlors to recommend?

 

[Fradi]

with the last two ladies, I was slow and last around 5-10 mins, seems awkward to book a one-hour session as what am I going to do with the rest of the time?

so it's better to call a well-reviewed escort from an agency, and try to avoid ladies from leolist?

What are you going to do if you get married. Marriages are supposed to last way more than 5-10 minutes lol.
Talk, ask questions make them feel like they are the gorgeous wonderful women that they are, before you realize it you will last much longer than 5-10 minutes and there is much more to be enjoyed with them than just fucking.

 

[Abathur]

What are you going to do if you get married. Marriages are supposed to last way more than 5-10 minutes lol.
Talk, ask questions make them feel like they are the gorgeous wonderful women that they are, before you realize it you will last much longer than 5-10 minutes and there is much more to be enjoyed with them than just fucking.

yeah, it's different with girlfriends and wives as you guys have love, have a Foundation of trust. you guys can chat, can laugh, can curdle afterward, there is no rush, can play all night, even if you don't perform well that time, there is always tomorrow.

It's different with escorts, they charge by the hours, costs add up and there is a sense of urgency, and they are professionals, they can meet your fantasies but with no emotion attached.

to be honest, I sometimes play with toys which I found is more intense than the real thing, I can last 30 mins, I think I am just too nervous around real women for now

 

[Fradi]

It is really up to you to decide what it is you want out of meeting escorts.
Is it the 30 minute empty your balls and move on to the next one available, or as they say any port in a storm.

The other option is booking a longer session with a well reviewed SP who is known to give you the full GFE experience and you will get over you awkwardness and inexperience and learn a lot in the process of how to approach a civilian girl that you want to have a relationship with.
These ladies are not just gorgeous and a wonderful fuck, they are women just like all the rest with the same dreams same wishes and if you treat them with kindness you will learn a lot from them that will help you deal better with a real relationship.
Yes it is a fantasy that you are paying more for but some of these ladies are so good at it it will be hard for you to distinguish it from reality which could even be a bigger problem if you fall for one of them.

 

[Christian32]

Don't do it to get experience, as oppose to what many can say, it does't make you superior or whatever. Do it for fun.

 

[Flyingby]

with the last two ladies, I was slow and last around 5-10 mins, seems awkward to book a one-hour session as what am I going to do with the rest of the time?

so it's better to call a well-reviewed escort from an agency, and try to avoid ladies from leolist?

Did you watch zombieland
It’s called the double tap!
Ending in 5-10 mins is perfect!
You reload and go for round 2
Lasting long is overrated when you pay

 

[TheJames101]

... and have at least hundreds if not thousands of encounters.

If it makes you feel any better, this is definitely not true (assuming you mean with different women). There are some men, of course... but they are the minority.

 

[Abathur]

If it makes you feel any better, this is definitely not true (assuming you mean with different women). There are some men, of course... but they are the minority.

I meant the same women like your girlfriend or wife, at least at the beginning, the passion phrase? God, certainly not hundreds of diff women.

 

[TheJames101]

I meant the same women like your girlfriend or wife, at least at the beginning, the passion phrase? God, certainly not hundreds of diff women.

Ah ok, well nevertheless.... having hundreds of sexual encounters with only a few women does not guarantee you won't be awkward with a new person.

 

[sene5hos]

It's different with escorts, they charge by the hours, costs add up and there is a sense of urgency, and they are professionals, they can meet your fantasies but with no emotion attached.

to be honest, I sometimes play with toys which I found is more intense than the real thing, I can last 30 mins, I think I am just too nervous around real women for now

I understand you very well. When I started with escorts, I was nervous at first.

I met a few girls and never went back, because I didn't know Merb. Since I got to know Merb, I haven't thrown my money out the window.

For you I think that the young agency girls would not meet your expectations, because as you say "they can meet your fantasies but no emotion"

It's about finding the right one.
You are normal, even today when my favorite undresses I get erect, but on the other hand I am no longer 29 years old. At that point, you simply explain this to your partner and she will fill you up twice.

Good luck

 

[CydoniaNights]

yeah, it's different with girlfriends and wives as you guys have love, have a Foundation of trust. you guys can chat, can laugh, can curdle afterward, there is no rush, can play all night, even if you don't perform well that time, there is always tomorrow.

It's different with escorts, they charge by the hours, costs add up and there is a sense of urgency, and they are professionals, they can meet your fantasies but with no emotion attached.

to be honest, I sometimes play with toys which I found is more intense than the real thing, I can last 30 mins, I think I am just too nervous around real women for now

As someone who is in same boat as you ( young, inexperienced, awkward) I can guarantee you that the agency and merb indies can create those emotional moments with you. Most are very good at dealing with socially stunted men. They know how to lead a conversation and put you at ease. They want you to enjoy yourself and feel comfortable with them. Obviously it won’t be the same as having a long term gf. But it can definetly help you get more comfortable talking with women and being comfortable in intimate setting. Alot of these girls are very honest, tell them up front that you are socially ackward/anxious and you are trying to improve your socialization with women and I can say with confidence most will make an effort to guide you in a good direction.

As for the “what do I do after I cum” question. Use that time to talk with her and try and form a connection. Very few guys go at it for a full session of sex. I myself tend to also last between 5-10 mins, sometimes less on a bad day. Use the rest of the time to socialize. You can even go for a second round if you are able to get it up fast enough.
Don’t be afraid to ask the girls to cuddle either. Most of them won’t initiate it but you would be hard pressed to find one that would refuse a nice relaxing cuddle session if you asked for one. You were just inside them after all.

I definetly owe many of the ladies I have seen alot in terms of my comfort around women but also my social skills have improved as well. Although I still have alot of confidence and anxiety issues that hold me back from getting into a relationship i’m definetly getting better and I think you can too, if you start seeing agency/merb advertised indies for minimum 1 hour and actively engage in socializing with them instead of a “wam bam thank you mam” out the door scenario you seem to be currently doing.

Good luck on your journey

 

[Flyingby]

Ok. Real advice
Book an sp with experience. Minimum 26 years of age The young hotties are good. But will not teach you
April rose, sonia von satcher, anna at euphoria. Great examples
When I was starting. I booked Anna. When she was giving me a bj, I closed my eyes. She told me to look at her. Enjoy all of it. She let me get 4 pops in the hour with encouragement

a young hottie had made me feelbad about even requesting round 2
So. See a girl with experience. Skip the new girls

and finally. Tell yourself the following. You are not there to impress them! They are there to impress you

 

[in4hell]

Go see sonia von sacher
Thank me later

I second this. Go see her... great personality, she will take care of you and you will enjoy every second of it