Chester Brown:" Paying for it"

[professorbig]

I read a review in the Sunday New York Times of a new graphic novel about being a "John", by toronto cartoonist Chester Brown. The review is by sexecologist and former porn star Annie Sprinkle. I thumbed through a few pages in the bookstore....a few experiences he drew out were pretty similar to some I have had. Many of my montreal experiences have been quite enjoyable, not sure he has had as good luck in Toronto, I know I haven't.

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/07/03/books/review/book-review-paying-for-it-by-chester-brown.html
One wonders if more men come out as johns if the hobby and the escort profession would gain more acceptance, or will the more public conversation create a backlash.

looks like a good heartfelt book.

 

[evillethings]

... One wonders if more men come out as johns if the hobby and the escort profession would gain more acceptance, or will the more public conversation create a backlash...

professorbig, I'd have to imagine in most western societies acceptance would be achieved in a relative short period of time say less than 5yrs ( hasn't it already in France, Italy, etc.) but there would be a lot of backlash initially...

Makes me think of the evolution of the Pride Parade and how there was a huge outcry against openly promoting homosexual activities / lifestyle... fastfwd to the present, the Parade is almost "just" another reason to party on the streets, along with St. Patty's Day, Xmas, Cari-fest.

 

[CS Martin]

relative short period of time say less than 5yrs....

Not sure 5 years is realistic with regard to the U.S. The US is still having trouble with the decriminalization of pot, let alone prostitution. I'd say pot has a better chance just on economics alone. The US has to get realistic about these issues.

 

[evillethings]

Not sure 5 years is realistic with regard to the U.S. The US is still having trouble with the decriminalization of pot, let alone prostitution...

True, very true... sometimes I forget how puritan policies are South of the border.

BTW, welcome back from ur vacation CS Martin!

 

[anon_vlad]

Given that the employers in the US have been able to get away with firing employees for activities in the employees' personal lives which have very little pertinence to work, I doubt that in this time of high employment, most employees would dare to espouse support for the legalization of prostitution. Chester Brown is one of a small minority which doesn't have to worry about being ostracized by his peers nor a loss of income from potential clients or employers for admitting to partaking in the "hobby".

 

[CS Martin]

Given that the employers in the US have been able to get away with firing employees for activities in the employees' personal lives which have very little pertinence to work, I doubt that in this time of high employment, most employees would dare to espouse support for the legalization of prostitution.

Well in a way you're correct. Employee's political and/or social views normally should have little to do with their work lives. This is protected in many areas. There's a caveat though........Many major employers usually have some type of morals and/or other limitations clause built into their employment contract. Just as the employee is free to have these political/social views, the employer is free to REASONABILY set employee's behavior as it may reasonably affect their employment. Please understand there are all kinds of if's and's or but's that go with these generalizations. Further, the positions vary from state to state. In addition, the constitutionality of these parameters are in constant flux. Then blend in the Unons and wa-la instant new business opportunities for lawyers.

As an example, Florida is sold as a "right to work" state. The mere statement itself is sometimes an oxymoron. The term "right to work" has a darker side that allows employers to terminate an employee for virtually anything. Sounds simple, but blend that with conflicting statutes and appelate court cases to render an everchanging body of law. As are most things in the States, it's confusing and varies from State to State. Florida has a statute that bars employers from retaliatory terminations. But the statute is poorly drafted and has a mediorce track record of application and enforcement.

There's a case right on point of a popular and successful Volusia County Flootball Coach. He was picked up on Street Solicitation, then temporarily suspended. Because of his profile, various legal objections, and limited public support he was reinstated, only to be moved to a backwater program and quietly forced into retirement. I'm giving you the reader's digest verion, but you can Google it for yourself.

 

[Stroman]

Just to go back to main topic, I read the book. It's amazing. Totally loved it. I think a lot of people can relate to the main character.

 

[sigma69]

I also enjoyed the book very much.
But I do not know about relating to the main character. By his own admission, he is not very expressive and rather stoic. But his logic about why seeing escorts is OK for him and should be OK for whoever wants to is faultless. The appendix is several pages of logical, clear and supported arguments why sex work should be decriminalized. Chester Brown does not support full legalization, and he explains why.

Finally, it must be said that this is not a work of fiction. It is a non-fiction, based on the author's own experience with escorts.

 

[daydreamer41]

Most women see men paying for it as a weakness. Men who are skilled at "getting it" for free see it as unnecessary, but are not as judgemental as women.

From reading the review, it looks like an interesting read. He counters the statement that prostitution gives men power over the woman. Most Johns are non-violent average guys and the woman actually has the power in the situation. At the end of the hour, he leaves or she leaves and leaves her money. And when bad things happen to prostitutes, it's because many times it is done in secret.

 

[bigjean]

très intéressant a lire comme bd.
Beaucoup d'expériences qu'il a vécu (23 filles + plusieurs repeats), il y en a plusieurs auquel on peut s'identifier : le stress de la première fois, des rencontres mémorables d'autres qu'on se souvient pas, tout le jargon qu'on doit apprendre pour comprendre ce qui se passe, des discussions intéressantes, aller sur terb, pas mal tout y passe.

 

[sigma69]

Au cas où certains ne le sauraient pas, le livre de Chester Brown est maintenant disponible en français.
En français, le livre s'intitule "Vingt-trois prostituées" et est publié en plus gros format que la version originale anglaise.
La traduction semble trés bien faite.

Renaud-Bray au Complexe Desjardins en avait 14 exemplaires il y a quelques jours. Faut croire qu'ils anticipent de bonnes ventes.

Un bouquin qui ne fait pas dans le cliché et qui suscite de sérieuses réflexions sur l'amour, le sexe et la prostitution. À lire.

 

[PopeDover]

Chester is first ballot hobbying hall of famer. :hail:


http://www.comicsbeat.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/chester_brown_paying_for_it.jpg

https://travellingman.files.wordpress.com/2011/09/pfi_030.jpg

http://goodokbad.com/assets/images/books/payingForIt_03.png

 

[westwoody]

Most women see men paying for it as a weakness. Men who are skilled at "getting it" for free see it as unnecessary, but are not as judgemental as women.

Women consider it a threat and fear it and hate it.
Sex is the only lever most women have to use against men.
If I can get all I want from a lady in exchange for cash then no woman has any power over me -- except that particular woman.

From reading the review, it looks like an interesting read. He counters the statement that prostitution gives men power over the woman. Most Johns are non-violent average guys and the woman actually has the power in the situation. At the end of the hour, he leaves or she leaves and leaves her money. And when bad things happen to prostitutes, it's because many times it is done in secret.

Yes it is embarrassing to admit, but if I am with a woman I really like I am pretty much at her mercy. She has the power, not me.

 

[Ivy Angel]

I loved that graphic novel so much!!! I wish there were more comics and graphic novels about the industry from both sides! <3

 

[Doc Holliday]

A few weeks ago i was at Indigo Books checking out the graphic novels section when i stumbled upon this book:

LOVE ADDICT: Confessions of a Serial Dater

It's written by someone named Koren Shadmi. It's absolutely hillarious!!! :lol:

Here's a link to purchasing the book if any of you are interested:

Confessions of a Serial Dater

Confessions of a Serial Dater

 

[applebaum]

Most women see men paying for it as a weakness

What percentage of SPs do you all think feel this way?

 

[Doc Holliday]

What percentage of SPs do you all think feel this way?

I disagree with what daydreamer41 posted. It goes both ways. Some women see it as a weakness, while others see it as an asset and a sign of power. Many sps have told me over the years that they can actually understand why many men (such as me and others) would prefer seeing sps once in a while instead of committing to long-term relationships with no guarantee of succeeding and let's face it: where the odds are stacked up against them succeeding.

It's also very hard to make an opinion on the matter when we are absent of facts.

 

[Splotch]

Chester's Brown Paying For It is a very interesting read!
It will strike a cord with many of us here as it details the steps to becoming a john, and it is relentlessly honest about it subject matter (I highly suspect that Chester Brown has Asperger's , which can be seen by his character's lack of traditional emotional response and disregard for social mores).

Very minimalistic in it's style ( black and white, repeating compositions, neutral expressions for the characters, very rational way of seeing things...), it is also a easy and quick read, even if it is 200+ pages long.
Just be advised that it is not the typical comic book: it is very unsentimental and detached view of the world of escorts and their clients, and of relationships and sex.

Sidenote: Man, poor Chester taking a chance with newspaper ads to see escorts before the days of the Internet, weesh! ( Although, the Internet makes it's way in the story at some point)
I think we are spoiled with dedicated websites and review boards! The Wild West period is over! (well, there is still things like Backpage for the people looking for surprises and adventure! ;P )

 

[Doc Holliday]

I finally got my copy yesterday. Once i'm done with the current book i'm reading, i'll start reading Chester's book. Should be fun!

 

[Doc Holliday]

I just finished reading the book. Absolutely great book!!! It's the kind of book that i've always wanted to write!! A lot of stuff in it hit home and also opened my eyes about many things in regards to the hobby. I've also experienced several moments the main character also experienced, which i had forgotten.

What was most fascinating was how honest it was and the fact the book was autobiographical. I tip my hat off to the author and main character of the book, Chester Brown. What a book!