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Dealing with the depths of depression

General Gonad

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I think it's important that we recognize depression and help those around us that we care for. The FDA posted an excellent article on this subject (full link below):

Dealing with the Depths of Depression
by Liora Nordenberg

"I am now the most miserable man living. If what I feel were equally distributed to the whole human family, there would be not one cheerful face on earth. Whether I shall ever be better, I cannot tell. I awfully forebode I shall not. To remain as I am is impossible. I must die or be better it appears to me."
--Abraham Lincoln


Imagine attending a party with these prominent guests: Abraham Lincoln, Theodore Roosevelt, Robert Schumann, Ludwig von Beethoven, Edgar Allen Poe, Mark Twain, Vincent van Gogh, and Georgia O'Keefe. Maybe Schumann and Beethoven are at the dinner table intently discussing the crescendos in their most recent scores, while Twain sits on a couch telling Poe about the plot of his latest novel. O'Keefe and Van Gogh may be talking about their art, while Roosevelt and Lincoln discuss political endeavors.

But in fact, these historical figures also had a much more personal common experience: Each of them battled the debilitating illness of depression.

It is common for people to speak of how "depressed" they are. However, the occasional sadness everyone feels due to life's disappointments is very different from the serious illness caused by a brain disorder. Depression profoundly impairs the ability to function in everyday situations by affecting moods, thoughts, behaviors, and physical well-being.

Twenty-seven-year-old Anne (not her real name) has suffered from depression for more than 10 years. "For me it's feelings of worthlessness," she explains. "Feeling like I haven't accomplished the things that I want to or feel I should have and yet I don't have the energy to do them. It's feeling disconnected from people in my life, even friends and family who care about me. It's not wanting to get out of bed some mornings and losing hope that life will ever get better."

Depression strikes about 17 million American adults each year--more than cancer, AIDS, or coronary heart disease--according to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH). An estimated 15 percent of chronic depression cases end in suicide. Women are twice as likely as men to be affected.

Many people simply don't know what depression is. "A lot of people still believe that depression is a character flaw or caused by bad parenting," says Mary Rappaport, a spokeswoman for the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill. She explains that depression cannot be overcome by willpower, but requires medical attention.

Fortunately, depression is treatable, says Thomas Laughren, M.D., team leader for psychiatric drug products in FDA's division of neuropharmacological drug products.

In the past 13 years, the Food and Drug Administration has approved several new antidepressants, including Wellbutrin (bupropion), Prozac (fluoxetine), Zoloft (sertraline), Paxil (paroxetine), Effexor (venlafaxine), Serzone (nefazodone), and Remeron (mirtazapine).

According to the American Psychiatric Association (APA), 80 to 90 percent of all cases can be treated effectively. However, two-thirds of the people suffering from depression don't get the help they need, according to NIMH. Many fail to identify their symptoms or attribute them to lack of sleep or a poor diet, the APA says, while others are just too fatigued or ashamed to seek help.

Left untreated, depression can result in years of needless pain for both the depressed person and his or her family. And depression costs the United States an estimated $43 billion a year, due in large part to absenteeism from work, lost productivity, and medical costs, according to the National Depressive and Manic Depressive Association.

Link to full article (there is a lot more worth reading but it's too long):

http://www.fda.gov/fdac/features/1998/498_dep.html


GG
 
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General Gonad

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Depression versus bipolar disorder

Equally important is to recognize the difference between depression and bipolar disorder, which is rarer:

http://www.isitreallydepression.com/mini_c/isitreallydepression/link/depvsbpolar.asp#2/

Again, I am not a trained psychiatrist so you shouldn't just assume things by reading them here or on the internet. If you feel profoundly unable to cope with life for whatever reason, it is best to consult with a trained professional. Often, there is hope and you would be surprised at how much better your quality of life will be. And I am not speaking from personal experience but rather from close friends that have suffered through crippling bouts of depression and seeked professional help to deal with it.

GG
 

docprostate

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Depression

A ''burn-out'' is in fact a depression!
 

naughtylady

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docprostate A ''burn-out'' is in fact a depression!

Not always. Burn out occurs when your stress level exceed your coping skills over an extended period of time. Depression is very frequently one of the symptoms, but not always. Clinical depression is the result of a chemical imbalance similar to the way diabetes is. One can be depressed but not burnt-out just as one can be burnt out and not be depressed. There are different types of burnout. Sometimes the symptome are mostly physical, with out being clinically depressed.

Having survived depression myself (Yes, I chose to use the word "survived". Depression is an illness that takes many lives.) One of the best descriptions I have found of what it is like comes from J.K. Rowlings, of Harry Potter fame, when she talks about the "dementors" in Prizoner of Azkaban.

Ronnie,
Naughtylady
 

General Gonad

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male depression

naughtylady said:
Having survived depression myself (Yes, I chose to use the word "survived". Depression is an illness that takes many lives.) One of the best descriptions I have found of what it is like comes from J.K. Rowlings, of Harry Potter fame, when she talks about the "dementors" in Prizoner of Azkaban.

Ronnie,
Naughtylady

Thanks for sharing Ronnie, I am sure it wasn't easy to survive this.

BTW, while females are more prone to depression, males suffer too. I was reading the reviews on Terrence Real's book here:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/06...5310-3440013?_encoding=UTF8&v=glance&n=283155

Also, have a look at Dr. David Wexler's book:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/15...6549-5685625?_encoding=UTF8&v=glance&n=283155

Both are worth reading for a perspective on male depression.

GG
 
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naughtylady

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No it wasn't easy at all. At first I resisted going for help. I was sure that I could pull my self out of it. By the time I went for help, I was what they called non-functioning. Could not work. I even found opening the mail overwhelming. It got so bad at one point that I could no longer recall what happy felt like or having ever felt happy. I cried so much every day that the skin on my face was irrated from the salt in my tears. You don't have to wait as long as I did to get help. The longer you are sick (yes it is an illness) the longer it takes to get better.

Actually I am bi-polar and was originally diagnosed with clinical depression. For a long time we kept trying different medications that didn't work. It was only when I swung into a manic phase that I realised that I was wrongly diagnosed and got on the right medication.

Once on the right medication I realised that I had never really known what normal was like and that it is a progressive illness. I have tried to go off medication more than once but I cannot. Like a diabetic whose body does not produce insulin, my body does not produce enough chemicals that allow me to maintain a sense of normalcy over any extended period of time.

I once asked my doctor if this meant I was certifiably crazy but he told me I used to be crazy but that I am all better now (as long as I take my meds ;) )

Personally I am not convinced that actually more women suffer from depression. I suspect that it is likely that less men go get help and thus suffer quietly by themselves.

I hope my sharing can help someone else know that they are not alone and that there is light at the end of the tunnel (no it is not a train). Just hang in there and go get help. If you do not have a G.P. call your local C.L.S.C. or go to a walk-in clinic or even a hospital emergency(especially if you lost the will to live or are thinking about suicide, even if you haven't reached the stage where it seems like the only way to end the pain (for those who have never been there, the pain is not only mental but physical also ))


Ronnie,
a very happy, yet very naughtylady
 
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chef

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naughtylady said:
......................One of the best descriptions I have found of what it is like comes from J.K. Rowlings, of Harry Potter fame, when she talks about the "dementors" in Prizoner of Azkaban.

Ronnie,
Naughtylady

My god, that must have been bad, considering the description in the book. I think we all have our "down" periods, but they are trivial compared to the description of the "dementors".
 

General Gonad

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naughtylady said:
Personally I am not convinced that actually more women suffer from depression. I suspect that it is likely that less men go get help and thus suffer quietly by themselves.

Ronnie,

Thanks again and I agree with you that men rarely discuss these issues. We are taught to be stoic and invincible. What a load of crap! If you need help, swallow your pride and go get it. Life is too short to worry about what "others" think.

GG
 
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naughtylady

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GG>> You're welcome.

chefplus>> Yes it was bad. Desperately so. That is why I say I survived depression.

So many people who have never suffered so think it is akin to the normal depressions one goes through with life during some of the hard times. It is not. For example one might feel down during a break up, but can still remember the good times, and even feel hopeful. Not so with when clinical depression is left untreated.

Don't do what I did. Don't wait until you are completely desperate before getting help. It doesn't need to get that bad. For many, medication for six months or a year or so is enough to get them out of that rut and back to living life rather than suffering.

Ronnie,
Naughtylady
 

General Gonad

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btyger said:
Somehow, I've managed to stay employed, but I have neglected a lot of other things in life. Between the mess I've made and my compulsive hobbying, I know it's time to get help. Way past time, really. I have a son to think of.

btyger,

Hang in there buddy and take Ronnie's advice. BTW, use your son as an anchor but in the end you need to do this for yourself, which will help him as well.

Finally, I suggest both you and Ronnie pick up Kay Redfeld Jamison's books on battling manic depression. She is a psychiatrist who has written an amazing autobiography, Touched With Fire, and her sequel, An Unquiet Mind (see below).

GG

Description:

"In Touched with Fire, Kay Redfield Jamison, a psychiatrist, turned a mirror on the creativity so often associated with mental illness. In this book she turns that mirror on herself. With breathtaking honesty she tells of her own manic depression, the bitter costs of her illness, and its paradoxical benefits: "There is a particular kind of pain, elation, loneliness and terror involved in this kind of madness.... It will never end, for madness carves its own reality." This is one of the best scientific autobiographies ever written, a combination of clarity, truth, and insight into human character. "We are all, as Byron put it, differently organized," Jamison writes. "We each move within the restraints of our temperament and live up only partially to its possibilities." Jamison's ability to live fully within her limitations is an inspiration to her fellow mortals, whatever our particular burdens may be. --Mary Ellen Curtin"


Amazon link:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/06...lance&n=283155&tagActionCode=psycomnetdepress
 

naughtylady

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I already have a copy of "An Unquiet Mind". A well written informative yet interesting book. I certainly did see myself in many passages.

Looking back, I believe I first started experiencing what is refered to as hypo-manic episodes in my late teens or early twenties. It is difficult to tell before that as it is normal for children to have a lot of energy and it is also normal for teens to experience those teenage-blues.

Ronnie,
Naughtylady

P.S. Take a look at my book thread: https://merb.cc/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=15617
(Yes I know GG you have already posted there but for everyone else ;) )
 

shijak

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with all due respect, General, i feel there is only so much any book can do in the case of depression. I've read a few, but it was only through the help and guidance of an unbiased professional psychologist that I was able to peel away a whole lot of accumulated emotional "shit" (pardon the language, but I feel it's appropriate here).

We as humans are so complex that often we don't even perceive some of our "wounds", especially when there are many of them all piled up. I've gone to see a psychotherapist on a one-on-one basis, and I made quite a bit of progress towards the more balanced person I feel I am today, but let me tell you that it was when I participated in supervised group therapy getaways that some important breakthroughs were made. i shudder to think how i'd be today if I hadn't agreed to join in these sessions...

Just like we learn as a group in school, i and the others present were able to isolate and eradicate a bunch of emotional parasites that clung on for much too long, and most of it was done simply from talking it out and from listening to the others...

There's more to it than that, of course, but I highly recommend such getaways to anyone, as I feel you will get faster, more evident results than through the reading of books...
 
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chef

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spiderman05 said:
..............I had and still have suicidal ideas. ...............

Spiderman: we have met only once, but through our exchange across this board I consider you a friend. If you have any such ideas please stop and reconsider. I am willing to help in any way I can....if you need someone to talk to, just let me know.
 

General Gonad

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spiderman05 said:
This is the first time I talk about this so openly. I was almost forced on 2 occasions to consult a psychologist. On both occasions I was just trying to convince the doctor that I had no problems. The problem is that I never believed in professional help nor in antidepressants.

spiderman05,

Thanks for sharing and now listen to me carefully: please go see a psychiatrist, not a psychologist. A psychiatrist is an MD who can prescribe medication. You need professional help and don't be ashamed of it.

Please do not think twice about consulting a psychiatrist; I guarantee you'll be better off in the future.

GG
 

shijak

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spiderman05 said:
This is the first time I talk about this so openly. I was almost forced on 2 occasions to consult a psychologist. On both occasions I was just trying to convince the doctor that I had no problems. The problem is that I never believed in professional help nor in antidepressants.

Spidey, I completely agree with Chef, there is no need to go through life thinking this way...There is no, I'll repeat , NO shame in seeking the help of a psychologist. Just go back and read my previous post in this thread, and see that I went to get help when i really, REALLY needed it. I have never taken antidepressants, though I don't think ill of anyone who does.

you'll find that for most people, the bottled-up emotions we go through that ultimately lead us to depressions are the result of our powerlessness, guilt, poor self-image and unresolved childhood sadness...

Here is what i learned about myself while in therapy: for too many years, i hated myself because I mistakenly believed that no one else did. I was the by-product of the typical unemotional father and an overprotective mother, who failed to nurture my sense of self-worth and pride that i always craved...My siblings also display the same things but in different ways...
i went through my teenage years very much a loner trapped in his bubble...

But you know, despite this, I had a ferocious adventuring spirit that had me leaving my hometown at a young age to go live on my own in this city...The road to today had quite a few bumps, but with determination i got my university degree, raised a child, became pretty successful in my field...

the downside until i sought therapy was my constant bad choices in relationships, dour viewpoint, workaholism.

Getting help a few years ago was the best thing i ever did in my life, as family and friends often remark how changed I am (I actually can take a joke now!) even my presence on merb has been beneficial in my ongoing evolution, believe it or not...

Spidey, we haven't met, unlike you and Chef, but I beseech you to reconsider trusting in a skilled therapist. you mention certain things I'm all too familiar with: a sad reaction when watching certain movies is a sure sign of other things scratching at the surface that demand to be released somehow...

I'll give you an example: About 5 years ago, at my second group therapy getaway, I'd been finding myself prey to random unexpected crying fits for a few months before. A few days into the session, a young woman recounted her specific health problems and their malignant effect on her life, and soon after I completely erupt in tears as I realized my sobbing fits were caused by a friend's recent death i thought i'd put behind me, but i'd still not dealt with the guilt I'd felt for not helping her enough before her death.

The young woman herself made me realize that there was nothing I could have done, and that I should let go of that guilt that was crippling me. thanks to her, i finally did...

i hope you reconsider...
 

naughtylady

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The problem is that I never believed in professional help nor in antidepressants.

spiderman05>>> Not to be harsh but, so you believe in feeling miserable all the time? Finding the mail overwhelming is preferable? Suicidal thoughts are preferable to getting help?

Please, rethink your thought process. One of the symptoms of clinical depression is denial that we need help in the first place.

Ronnie,
Naughtylady
 

General Gonad

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I am glad you're doing better and stay on your treatment. Again, psychologists can help but they cannot prescribe medication, so in many cases you need to consult with a psychiatrist, especially if your symptoms get worse or if they persist.

GG
 

chef

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spiderman05 said:
.........................I had and still have suicidal ideas. The occurence frequency of such ideas varies. I might be ok for several months, then these ideas come back every oher day or once a week. I never attempted to commit suicide though. I also have some black-out periods where I litterally isolate myself from the external world, not even answering the phone when friends call.

This is the first time I talk about this so openly. I was almost forced on 2 occasions to consult a psychologist. On both occasions I was just trying to convince the doctor that I had no problems. The problem is that I never believed in professional help nor in antidepressants.

Spiderman: A few years ago, out of the blue I had severe tinnitus (ringing in the years) at night when trying to sleep; it sounded lke someone was grinding metal near my ears. Sleep was impossible, and I did contemplate suicide since my doctor told me that it may or may not go away - believe me it was hell for a few weeks. Then the doctor gave me what he called a mild sleeping pill and that really helped; I was on it for a couple of months. I then found out that it really was a mild antidepressent, and so I stopped taking it, fortunately with no ill effects - like yourself I did not believe in antidepressents, but believe me, that really helped. The ringing is all but gone; when it gets a bit loud I can now ratilonalize it....so you don't necessarily have to take medication all your life.

The whole point of this post is to tell you that you should seek psychiatric help, as GG indicated. As my doctor says, "The best pill is no pill, but sometimes you need some help so you have to take one".
 

tonsecret

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Big Daddy Cool said:
That's why I'm considering leaving back to Toronto where I was happy. Overall because I do feel so alone, I have considered suicide, but the guys on the other threed encouraged me to hang in there. I thank each and everyone of you and it really meent a lot that people were concern and showed compasion.

Hi Big Daddy, I dont want to sound simplistic but, why stay here if you were happier in TO? Also, I want to tell you that I, too went into severe depression a few years ago, enough to be put under medication and be closely folowed by professionals. I almost did it in the Metro too, however, I am quite happy I did not do it today because I made deep changes in my life and am happier now than ever (And I took medications for a year only). I just say this to let you know that if you do something about it, it will work and you will be happier. By "doing something" I say first, find a psychotherapist and talk about it. Maybe you will get on medication, maybe not (but in my case it was the thing to do).

Anyway, Hope i helped a little bit:)
 

andreww770

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oliver kloseoff said:
tonsecret
here is s dumb question
how does one know they are depressed
is it classic symptoms for everyone?
One thing I've picked up over the years is that it isn't always about happy and sad. If someone isn't motivated by anything...not interested in anything...thats depression whether they know it or not. Maybe thats why some pick up the hobby.
 
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