Do Some Members Take Others for Granted?

[Obvio-0bvio]

I’ve been taking a break from MERB not from the hobby, but from the forum itself, mainly because of how some members have treated me. I’ve faced false accusations, belittlement, and attempts to bully me. And honestly, it’s disheartening. This kind of behavior ruins it for others members who actually like my reviews and my taste.

Since my last reviews, I’ve seen at least 7–8 service provider, at least 2 were true hidden gems. Yet not a single review has been written about them. That says something. It seems like some members prefer to keep these providers to themselves instead of sharing with the community. But that’s not who I am. I believe in sharing, because that’s what MERB is supposed to be about: helping each other with sharing information on service providers , just like other members helped me when I first joined in 2006.
I’m not here for a popularity contest. I’m here to give back, the same way others guided me when I was new. I write reviews to share my honest experiences and help fellow members get the best value for their hard earned money.

Some members take issue with how I write my reviews.But let’s be clear: I’m paying for the experience, and I’m taking the time to write about it. Sure, I may not have perfect grammar, and maybe I like to use some grammar applications to polish my review but what matters the most is that my reviews are 100% honest and authentic. I don’t sugarcoat. I don’t write fake praise in exchange for anything. I just tell it how it is. The best part about writing reviews is when members who reach out thank me, especially those who’ve had similar experiences with the same providers after reading my reviews. That’s what makes it all worth it and that’s what MERB should be about.

It’s really sad when members try to shut others down or push them away simply because they don’t like that someone else is sharing so many information or because they envy someone’s frequency of with service providers encounters. Maybe they feel better tearing others down from behind a screen for their own personal gain. But this isn’t the community I first joined in 2006.Remember: members who take the time to write reviews aren’t doing it for personal gain. They do it because they care about the community and the hobby. This kind of negativity discourages honest members from contributing. And when that happens, we all lose.

So I want to ask ; have any of you experienced this kind of hate? Did it make you stop writing reviews? What can we do as a community to stop this toxic behavior and make MERB a better place again?Let’s work together and not against each other’s.

 

[Sean007]

Thanks for your heartfelt comment Obvio. What you are sadly describing is the dark side of social media. Some people are simply unable to have someone hav a different point of view from theirs or simply think that any opinion that is not theirs simply sucks. I have personnally never been the subject of such un tasteful and hateful commenting but I can feel how it must me disheartening. The bigger and better person will simply ignore such comments but I can understand it must be difficult. I believe I will be voicing in the name of all who read your tasteful reviews that we appreciate your insights. Please keep em coming!!!!

 

[EastWind]

White knights/Simps.

Once you realize the person you are interacting with falls into this category or even exhibit even a bit of white knight characteristics you cut off all contact ASAP and don't respond. This is coming from personal experience and I will give my interactions and occurrences as to my reasoning. I will leave out names btw.

 

[Flyingby]

Copy paste of your text from a year ago.

Thread 'Addressing Unacceptable Behavior'
https://merb.cc/xenforo/threads/addressing-unacceptable-behavior.231553/

And a few months ago
Post in thread 'Respond to PM.'
https://merb.cc/xenforo/threads/respond-to-pm.243573/post-1734995

A lot of this seems to be in your own head: The need to talk about how many girls you see. How guys are jealous of you. How life is unfair to you.

Write what you want. How you want.
Enjoy the hobby. Spend your money.
No one cares.
Stop crying victim.

P. S. You should change your name to Eminem.

 

[urquell]

I didn't have a dog in the last fight, wasn't really involved in it, and I don't have a dog in this one. I am going to say though, that it was probably a good idea for you to take a break and come back, just to let everything settle and let everyone move on from it. The problem is that now you've come back and you're starting all over again with exactly the same victim statements that got you into all the fighting last time. Predictably, the results and the responses are likely to be the same and will likely start the whole cycle all over again. It's a cry out for attention, approval and with what seems to me a subtext of you wanting the board to apologize, even indirectly, for the horrible way you were treated. I don't think it's going to happen, but I guess we'll see how it shakes out.

The ideal thing would have been to come back, do all the reviews that you want to do without the extraneous comments and shine a bright light on all the girls you like, etc, etc., and let the reviews speak for themselves. That's what the board is for. You are clearly passionate about the reviews you do, so just do them, using whatever tools you like, and let people respond to them on their own merits. There is going to be very little benefit in bringing up all this other stuff again, and I remember that the last time you said that you felt unable to stop responding when people were maligning you. When it happens again this time I hope you will have learned and can break the cycle. Again, I'm not here to argue with you and this will likely be my last word on the matter since I wasn't involved in the arguments last time either, but I hope you'll consider it.