Do you tell anyone about your hobby ?

[FindersKeepers]

I've only ever told an American cab driver about 1-2 years ago. I was in the States a while back. After my stay, I asked the hotel to get me a cab. As we passed a bridge on our way to the airport, he started telling me about how it used to be filled with girls back in his day. I don't know what prompted him to start telling me.

He was definitely a few decades older than me. I'm still in my early 20s. I guess the fact that I was a young man travelling alone and paying for his black car service hinted that I might partake in this hobby.

I decided to start telling him about the SPs I met in Europe about a year prior. I showed him pictures of the Ukrainian girls I had a threesome with and another of a Portuguese girl from their ads.

First and only time I told someone. Felt pretty relieving. I only told him about all this because I knew I wouldn't see him ever again.

He gave me his business card if ever I'm back in town. Told me he could help me get into a strip club next time (I told him I was not allowed in with my Canadian ID). He seemed to hint that he could help find SPs in his city, but there's no reason me to ever go back there for the foreseeable future.

Anyway, I'd prefer not to hobby in the US. I've done it once, and it was too expensive. There's also the fear of law enforcement. Instead, I find that Europe has some of the best talent and the safest environments.

 

[FindersKeepers]

Over the years I've been wondering who to tell about my hobbying habits.
So far, I've been answering the truth whenever an escort asks me how often I hobby.
I was also very transparent with a sugar baby I was seeing for a long time ( I knew it would never evolve into a traditional relationship ).
But with other potential sugar relationships, I'm not sure what I should admit to.

I've considered telling my best friend, because he's also a single dude, but he has less disposable income than me and I don't want to make him jealous.
Also, I have some open-minded friends but I wouldn't want the information to spread uncontrollably to anyone.

If I meet someone for a "traditional" and exclusive relationship, I'm pretty sure I will NOT tell them I've been seeing escorts every week. I might have to lie and say I've never done it. Or maybe should I admit to having just "tried" a couple of times ? I guess it depends on the person. I don't want to scare them away.

Do you tell anyone ?
What do you answer when in the context of traditional dating, a woman asks you if you've ever done it ?

I guess my previous reply didn't answer OP directly. I'll try again.

I don't tell anyone in my life. I think that's a recipe for disaster.

If anyone asks for my "body count", I tell them the number exclusive of providers. I risk a bit of trouble by including the fact that what I'm giving them is the "official" number. No more details beyond that.

 

[jmioffe]

I have monger friends. I have non-monger friends.

And I have friends who are smart enough to read between the lines and enforce a don't-ask-don't-tell policy with me. My friends are generally smart and flexible people, so this type is most common.

Of course, it's best to not have secrets between friends, so the monger friends are fun too. The only problem with them is that because our relationships are based on a hobby that is transactional, the interactions between my monger friends and me can be transactional as well.

Because our relationships are based on a hobby that encourages delusions, the interactions between my monger friends and me can be delusion-fueled as well.

What I mean is some of them are reluctant to share contacts with freelancers if they can't get a contact in return.

Meanwhile, they will parade that freelancer like a girlfriend on social media, when the freelancer would no doubt like to have more customers.

 

[arius2021]

I don't think I will ever tell to friends or family, unless the approach me and share their experiences first.

I was once in an 'open relationship' and also going to swingers clubs/parties. My ex was open about it and shared our experiences with almost everone... It did create a stigma around us and you could feel the judgement from others.

Now, it's I keep it for myself!

 

[LC18]

I tell people “I have to go return some video tapes”

There is a restaurant in old Montreal called Dorsia. If you haven’t tried, you should. Food is good, waiters aren’t rushing you to order and leave and you’ll feel like you’re a character in American Psycho

 

[TheBlob]

I told my priest during a confession

I bet he was jealous.

 

[VStampede]

I briefly talked about it with a friend back when he got divorced and he was looking to have a good time. However my female best friend knows and I update her about it every now and then. Took me a while to tell her but it just naturally came up one day and she's always been non-judgemental about it, if anything she's curious about all the aspects of it.

 

[Sean007]

I told no one and dont think i ever will.

 

[Wallon]

Mon meilleur ami est au courant, pas trop trop dans les détails, mais il sait que je me paie des escortes a l'occasion. Je le laisse sous-entendre avec d'autres personnes de facons superficielles. Je suis célibataire depuis 60 ans, j'ai eu quelques blondes a travers les années mais rien du tout depuis une vingtaine d'année.
On n'arrete pas d'avoir des besoins sexuels parce qu'on n'a pas de relations amoureuses avec des femmes, toute personne intelligente peut deviner facilement qu'il n'y a pas que la masturbation qui est en jeu pour solutionner le probleme.
Mais ce n'est clairement pas un sujet que la plupart des gens sont capable d'aborder, tout comme le sexe en général. Ca reste malheureusement tabou...

 

[redfried]

Je n'ai jamais vraiment parlé de ma vie sexuelle à qui que ce soit. Seul mes partenaires ont eu une petite idée de mes goûts.
Quant à mes fréquentations professionnelles, je ne l'ai confié qu'à une seule femme et j'ai fini par avoir un arrangement avec elle.

 

[Enjoying life]

I will never talk about it to anyone. Once its out, you can't take it back. Even close friends gossip about each other. A guy in my group talked about seeing escorts and most of the others kinda make fun of it, albeit in a light way tbh. But I don't want to be the topic of any of those discussions.

Both SPs and clients are stigmatized. But tbh I think nowadays as a client you're even more branded as a loser than the SP as "insert bad adjective".

The losers are men who are married to the women who are tide to their money costing the guy everyday with a sexless marriage which i know of some! Simps are the losers!

 

[Homer45]

One of my Best friends knows, he also is in the hobby, we even joke about it. He is in Mexico. I’m always like, when are you coming to MTL? I’ll book you the best as birthday gift lol. When I go to Mexico he also shares some contacts. Other than that, no one knows.

 

[LeDodo]

Same here. Actually I am new in the hobby. Accidentally a friend of mine wanted to try massage parlor as in his bucket list and I helped him look for information.
But after finding some I opened a Pandora box and my thirst for knowledge and curiosity made me arrive and start.

Even that friend to date think I only did MP.

Update: Now that friend knows and we are keeping that to the grave lol
"We" because I surprised and helped him book an appointment with a SP lol

 

[LiyaFields]

Over the years I've been wondering who to tell about my hobbying habits.
So far, I've been answering the truth whenever an escort asks me how often I hobby.
I was also very transparent with a sugar baby I was seeing for a long time ( I knew it would never evolve into a traditional relationship ).
But with other potential sugar relationships, I'm not sure what I should admit to.

I've considered telling my best friend, because he's also a single dude, but he has less disposable income than me and I don't want to make him jealous.
Also, I have some open-minded friends but I wouldn't want the information to spread uncontrollably to anyone.

If I meet someone for a "traditional" and exclusive relationship, I'm pretty sure I will NOT tell them I've been seeing escorts every week. I might have to lie and say I've never done it. Or maybe should I admit to having just "tried" a couple of times ? I guess it depends on the person. I don't want to scare them away.

Do you tell anyone ?
What do you answer when in the context of traditional dating, a woman asks you if you've ever done it ?

oh by hobby you meant hiring an sp regularly ? LOL at first I was like of course tell people what your hobbies are , can find potential hobby buddies but I guess different context here hehehe
Can you tell I’m new to this forum?

 

[R the Man]

I've been hobbying for over 20 years, seen over 800 SPs, and I would never tell a soul in my normal life. That's why it's so fun to meet up with a fellow hobbyist from this board or others, to swap stories. But only when I'm travelling - I wouldn't do it in my home town, no shitting where you eat

 

[Guitar123]

I agree with everyone who says you should never talk about this to anyone. Once, I told a friend about it, without going into detail. I chose him because I thought he was fairly open-minded. To my surprise, as soon as I told him that I sometimes go to massage parlors, I felt silently judged.

That’s when I realized that if even someone who seems open-minded in everyday life can judge me like that, it’s not worth it. You never really know people’s true beliefs until you’re faced with moments like this.

In short: keep it to yourself. Even people who seem open-minded aren’t necessarily as accepting as you might think.

 

[EagerBeaver]

 

[Enjoying life]

I agree with everyone who says you should never talk about this to anyone. Once, I told a friend about it, without going into detail. I chose him because I thought he was fairly open-minded. To my surprise, as soon as I told him that I sometimes go to massage parlors, I felt silently judged.

That’s when I realized that if even someone who seems open-minded in everyday life can judge me like that, it’s not worth it. You never really know people’s true beliefs until you’re faced with moments like this.

In short: keep it to yourself. Even people who seem open-minded aren’t necessarily as accepting as you might think.

Ya that is conventual way of thinking! He’s boring your not!

 

[TheJames101]

To my surprise, as soon as I told him that I sometimes go to massage parlors, I felt silently judged.

He was probably just thinking "shit, I hope I don't run into you next time I'm there".

 

[Samuellou666]

Only to very close and good friends yeah, they hobby too so we often like to grab a beer and share experiences