Review Forum for Sugar Babies?

[anon_vlad]

I propose that a review forum be added for women we have encountered on sugar baby websites. After all, some of us, now including myself, have opined that they are sex trade workers no less than escorts and MPs who have their own review forums. Just as with non agency escorts, there is always the risk of being robbed or defrauded by them, so I believe that our (monger) community would be served by our having a means to warn each other about bad actors on those websites. They all use pseudonyms, so there is little risk of libelling them. Also, at one point, one of the sugar baby websites was a merb advertiser.

Mods and members, what say you?

 

[Mod21]

Moved this thread from the Lounge to this subforum, as it is more likely to be seen here by Fred Zed.

All members are encouraged to express their views on the suggestion made by the OP.

One concern the moderation would have with the proposed subforum are the risks that personal information of the ladies posting on these sites would be openly shared and disclosed when it shouldn't be (see Rule #1 of the Forum). This is much more likely than with providers represented by agencies, working out of massage parlours, or working independently, for instance. Members with experience of the sugar baby websites are particularly encouraged to comment on this point.

 

[EagerBeaver]

On the point of SB ladies

They all use pseudonyms so there is little risk of libelling them.

I can specifically comment that this is not always true based on a date I had this past week. The woman was a relatively newbie to Seeking Arrangement. I asked her how she liked to be called and she then repeated the name she is using on SA. I said to her, "that's your real name?" And she said, "yeah." I then explained most ladies on the website use pseudonyms. The following day, she sent me a message thanking me for the date and the chocolates I had bought her. I noted 2 changes to her profile. One was a new profile pic, which did not show her face (the former one showed her face from a distance in a mirror). The other was that she changed her pseudonym on the website, from her real name to "SummerLuv." She is in Connecticut, and originally from Haiti. She told me during the date a friend of hers had suggested the site, and she was clearly naive about how to use it. I would suggest that many new users, since I mainly focus on them, are similarly naive and occasionally some do use their real names.

AV suggests the thread is needed to warn against frauds, and I agree on that point more than the need for reviews per se. The single biggest fraud on SA, and I am ashamed to admit I was victimized by it a couple times until I wised up, is women (or more likely men) posting fake profile pics (probably of their ex girlfriends) and then asking for money for sexy pics or videos arrangements. I no longer ever do such an arrangement with a woman unless I meet her in person.

Note that Seeking Arrangement does now have 2 anti-fraud measures that it did not have around 7-8 years ago to stop exactly this type of fraud. The first is SA verification. All this is is a driver's license verification for which the person seeking to be verified by SA pays to SA $5. The other is a video chat function within the SA software, which I have been asked to use and found the audio does not work very well. In almost all instances, where I have been asked to verify my identity, ladies have agreed to use of FaceTime in order to do so. Only one lady has asked me to do SA verification. I told her I was not going to give them my driver's license but I would do a Face Time with her. She relented and agreed to FT. Ladies do this for their own safety, but it is a 2 way street and also enables you to filter out frauds as noted above. For these reasons there are self help measures one can take to reduce the type of fraud of which AV speaks. Of course, it is true that this only verifies what someone looks like and she can still possibly be a rip off or con artist. To avoid that, it is best to have very clear communication before any meeting by text messaging or DMs. If anything sounds suspicious or vague, and a good explanation is not supplied, move on.

 

[anon_vlad]

I should explain what prompted my creation of this thread.

I met 8 sugar babies in the last year. I had thoroughly enjoyable sex with the first five. The last two scammed me and the third last was a waste of time.

The third last didn't exactly scam me, but it quickly became blindingly obvious that she wanted a free meal and a small gift.

The second last spent at least an hour texting and speaking on the phone with me. After we agreed to meet, she asked for $25 for a taxi, explaining that she had been stood up by men before. I sent her the money and wasn't distraught when she ghosted me afterwards. I would happily pay $25 insurance against an unpleasant encounter with a stranger.

The last was the worst. She told me that she had had sex with other sugar daddies and they claimed to be broke when the time came to pay, so I reluctantly agreed to pick her up and give her half the amount when she sat in my car. After talking for a few minutes while parked, she suddenly jumped out of the car and ran. I was, for a nano-second, tempted to catch her and recover the money. However, I realized that that would put me at risk of being arrested for assault and/or theft and acquiring a criminal record. Imagine having to explain such actions to a cop or a judge. "I paid her for sex (a crime under current law) and she took the money with no service, so I tackled her and wrenched the money out of her hand."

The vast majority of sugar babies do use a pseudonym. For the few who don't, we could only provide their first names in our reviews or fraud reports.

 

[EagerBeaver]

The third last didn't exactly scam me, but it quickly became blindingly obvious that she wanted a free meal and a small gift.

This is an absolutely reasonable expectation by any SB. I have dated literally 100 + SBs and every one of them had dinner paid and gift bought for them. This is why they are called SUGAR BABIES- they expect Sugar and that is what dinner and a gift is.

If you are looking for escorts and not SBs, you should post that so everyone know what your expectation is. But most SBs do not like being treated like escorts or being "hookerized", and your bad experience rate is very likely to be high if this is what your expectation is.

 

[anon_vlad]

This is an absolutely reasonable expectation by any SB. I have dated literally 100 + SBs and every one of them had dinner paid and gift bought for them. This is why they are called SUGAR BABIES- they expect Sugar and that is what dinner and a gift is.

If you are looking for escorts and not SBs, you should post that so everyone know what your expectation is. But most SBs do not like being treated like escorts or being "hookerized", and your bad experience rate is very likely to be high if this is what your expectation is.

My expectation is that we meet for a drink or dinner and if we like each other, have sex, possibly, but not necessarily the same evening. SB #6 knew this, had seen my picture beforehand so she couldn't have been disappointed with my appearance and we had a pleasant, even boisterous conversation. My hygiene is always impeccable.

 

[EagerBeaver]

My expectation is that we meet for a drink or dinner and if we like each other, have sex, possibly, but not necessarily the same evening.

The only issue here is who pays for that dinner in that situation. The expectation is always that any legit SD or gentleman will pay. I don't see how letting a woman pay in that situation is either expected or does anything to advance your cause. The derisive term "Splenda Daddy" refers to guys who don't wanna pay, it's the industry term for a cheap ass. Generally escorts and SBs are turned off by such behavior.

 

[anon_vlad]

The only issue here is who pays for that dinner in that situation. The expectation is always that any legit SD or gentleman will pay. I don't see how letting a woman pay in that situation is either expected or does anything to advance your cause. The derisive term "Splenda Daddy" refers to guys who don't wanna pay, it's the industry term for a cheap ass. Generally escorts and SBs are turned off by such behavior.

That would never be my issue. I expect a sugar baby to be seeking money, not the company of an older man and, of course, would always pay for dinner and bring a gift as well. Afterwards, she told me that we could meet for dinner as often as I wanted, but she never offered any sugar daddy any more than that. That was in contradiction to our discussions earlier.

 

[EagerBeaver]

OK- I guess I misunderstood your earlier post.

 

[ScottSD]

Absolutely agree that we need a sub for sugar babies, arrangements and the lifestyle are wrapped in a culture that is not well known.

Sugar Daddies are not necessarily looking for escorts (spectrum), yet a lot of escorts pose as sugar babies as well. There are also a lot of scammers/rinsers out there, so a general indication of having a successful arrangement with a lady would be weel worth to the community of sugar daddies who are more looking to provide long term for a young woman and to develop a meaningful relationship / connection.

 

[ramblinman69]

I much prefer the SB experience and having met several SB's over the years with mostly good experiences, I absolutely totally agree that there should be a SB review forum. I would have appreciated having the ability to see reviews of SB's and I'm pretty sure that I could have avoided a couple of bad encounters.

I have seen too many escorts posing as SB's on Seeking and other SB sites to not be concerned about the possibility of getting scammed, robbed or worse. As pointed out by Eager Beaver, many are newbies but as also pointed out by anon-vlad, many are scammers and like him I got caught with the "give me half when I get in the car and run at the stoplight" scam. Would have been nice to have a review!

Like ScottSd indicted :"arrangements and the lifestyle are wrapped in a culture that is not well known." More information would benefit both SB"s and SD"d.

MOD: when will we see a SB forum??

 

[doomer_nerd]

Simple way to get around this is to focus on the quality of the sexual experience, what lead to it, etc. No need to identify the girl beyong 'tall blonde'.

 

[anon_vlad]

Simple way to get around this is to focus on the quality of the sexual experience, what lead to it, etc. No need to identify the girl beyong 'tall blonde'.

What use is a review if we have no indication of who is being reviewed? I, for one, don't read merb reviews to live vicariously, but to know who gives great service, who may possibly attempt to rob me, whose description is accurate etc.

 

[The blondeguy]

Hi
Has anyone seen sugar babies that they would recommend, or once you have one , you keep them to yourself? I would assume these SB have more than one SD?

 

[ScottSD]

Hi
Has anyone seen sugar babies that they would recommend, or once you have one , you keep them to yourself? I would assume these SB have more than one SD?

Yes it's very frequent that they have multiple daddies as a mean to increase income. I don't personally date these girls and prefer monogamous arrangements, but girls lie often, most have a vanilla boyfriend who may not be aware so there is a high potential for drama. Stick to meet and greet protocol this save your time and will filter out escorts who will refuse to meet and greet. Also protocol is now to not agree to a gift for the initial meet in public, so only gift girls who don't request it, the others are rinsers and will consider it a wastes of time (they want to go directly to a hotel). This lifestyle requires some research to navigate prior or you will get scammed/fraud/deceived.

 

[The blondeguy]

Yes it's very frequent that they have multiple daddies as a mean to increase income. I don't personally date these girls and prefer monogamous arrangements, but girls lie often, most have a vanilla boyfriend who may not be aware so there is a high potential for drama. Stick to meet and greet protocol this save your time and will filter out escorts who will refuse to meet and greet. Also protocol is now to not agree to a gift for the initial meet in public, so only gift girls who don't request it, the others are rinsers and will consider it a wastes of time (they want to go directly to a hotel). This lifestyle requires some research to navigate prior or you will get scammed/fraud/deceived.

Thank you, yes I was seeing one who had a boyfriend and he actually thought we just had dinner together. He was too naive or stupid to realize sd/sb is a sexual relationship.

 

[anon_vlad]

Thank you, yes I was seeing one who had a boyfriend and he actually thought we just had dinner together. He was too naive or stupid to realize sd/sb is a sexual relationship.

There are a few who demand financial support for an "online relationship" or otherwise indicate that they only offer a platonic relationship. I've had a few inquiries from those seeking a "pay pig". I wonder how successful they are.

 

[anon_vlad]

Yes it's very frequent that they have multiple daddies as a mean to increase income. I don't personally date these girls and prefer monogamous arrangements, but girls lie often, most have a vanilla boyfriend who may not be aware so there is a high potential for drama. Stick to meet and greet protocol this save your time and will filter out escorts who will refuse to meet and greet. Also protocol is now to not agree to a gift for the initial meet in public, so only gift girls who don't request it, the others are rinsers and will consider it a wastes of time (they want to go directly to a hotel). This lifestyle requires some research to navigate prior or you will get scammed/fraud/deceived.

Some SB's claim to have a civilian job and are only attempting to supplement their income with a single SD. Others are simply escorts supplementing their income, getting gifts and dinners from regulars they can at least tolerate without having to surrender a portion of their earnings to an agency and who dream about a "Pretty Woman" scenario.

I know of a billionaire who paid 200K a month for exclusivity and his SB still cheated on him. Whether it is sex or companionship (or both) that you seek, find someone you enjoy spending time with and realize that monogamy and/or romance is highly improbable.

 

[dpman99]

I've been scammed by girls on SA so many times, it's not even funny.
I've probably lost so much money upfront. I promised myself I'd stop doing that.
My one advice to the SA lurkers, NEVER GIVE UP MONEY upfront.
Don't do it. Cause it's not worth it in the end.

If you build a relationship with your SB after 1 or 2 encounters, sure. But never before you meet them in person for the first time.

Always use a burner phone number and pictures that can't be traced to any personal social media. Definitely use an alias or fake name.
Someone catfished me on SA (who was also on MERB) tried to extort me a year ago.

As for the good side, I've fucked girls on SA who are ABSOLUTELY incredible.
I met this Ethiopian girl who rocked my world. I can't get her out of my head.
I've traveled the sex world on SA. Everything you want can be found on there.

 

[ScottSD]

I see where you're coming from. These girls are not girlfriend material, and I don't date the ones who do this. Bro code still applies and it's really unfair to a vanilla boy who's in love with these beauties to have us nut in his girl, it's really the girls who are at fault. I personally don't like triangulation so I avoid the ones who are in a supposedly open relationship the best I can.

Thank you, yes I was seeing one who had a boyfriend and he actually thought we just had dinner together. He was too naive or stupid to realize sd/sb is a sexual relationship.