Some Girl Advice pls

[pingpong99]

Ok Hi just want to get some advice here if anyone can give me some serious take on this.
I went to a birthday party last Saturday and it was for my sister , people in her office put the party on.The three main people to put this party of 30 persons were my girlfriend ,and the other 2 girls in the office.
I got along very well with one of the girls that works with my sister and girlfriend in the office.We clicked automatically friend wise and she made place for me next to my girlfriend and her(lets call her Nat).She is very friendly and we both were comfortable talking to each other.
She is a comfort to the eyes, later on in the night I told her out of no disrespect for our partners(she is with a guy 3 years now ,me 17 years) that she is very pretty, she looked surprised i told her this but also said thanks and was shy,embarrassed I said it.
I told her I loved brunettes and she had a thumbs up on this since there were 5 blondes at the next table.
Anyways I might seem like an ass , since my girlfriend was there but I can't seem to get her out of my head since.
She has been with her present boyfriend 3 years like I said but also has 2 kids with another guy whom she was with 6 years .She was treated like shit by him after the 2nd kid so she left.
I feel like sending her an e-mail but my sister and girlfriend work in same office as her.
Should I leave things alone or write her to at least tell her I'd like to be good friends with her?
Any help appreciated.Thks

 

[metoo4]

Leave that alone, Tony...

 

[master_bates]

Off limits, leave things as is

Forget about her, focus on your gf

 

[pingpong99]

Ok Thks I thought it would be those answers.
Can I ask u guys what reasons besides the obvious ones?

Thks

 

[ExoticSpirit]

Why don't you go for girls who are totally single? Why get into the complicated situations? Not only will you have to deal with two kids, but also another guy who is still in the picture. Are you that desperate that you have to settle with just this girl because you seemed to have clicked with her at some party?

 

[master_bates]

You're with your gf 17 years!!

Are you really willing to risk that for a girl that works with your gf

you clicked with 1 night at a party?

So not worth it

PS:Just because you clicked 1 night doesnt mean you will the next

 

[Lilly Lombard]

Reason

INFATUATION : state of being completely carried away by unreasoned passion

First, if your couple doesn't work the way you want anymore why don't you start by
1- Telling your GF
or
2- Finish the relationship you are in


Second, you met this girl at a party, one night, in a social environement. Do you really feel like you know the girl? A pretty face and a nice attitude (in public) only show the tip of the iceberg.


Third. If you go ahead and send her a message, then you will learn how bad this woman can be if she
1- Answer your email and wants to learn to know you more
or
2- Tells someone at the office about it (or tells your GF about it)
(either way, she is betraying someone)

Let say she doesn't speak to anyone and agrees to see you, well, she is cheating on her BF. In the eventuality that she dumps him and carries a relationship with you, you almost have a certainty that she might eventually do the same to you in the future.


Do you really want to try that?

Do it the healthy way instead :
1- Become single
2- Learn to enjoy being single
3- Put yourself back on the market
4- Find a single woman


Just my two cents.

 

[Bucky]

One word : Threesome ;-)

 

[pingpong99]

Ok Thks guys I just wanted some input , and agree on some.
It is not a sex relationship I wanted with her but a good friendship but again many little problems to overcome.
I guess I'll leave things alone.
I don't want to go single, just maybe have fun on the side, which is wrong but like I said maybe a good friend thing.
Thks

 

[Classy Angel]

I don't see it as being a problem if you tell your partner about it.

We live in such a fast paced world that it is often difficult to make real connections with people we genuinely like. When you do make one, it is difficult to see it get away.

If you are honestly looking for a non sexual relationship with her, then I really don`t see any problem with it, as long as you broach the subject with your girlfriend first. If she has no issues with it, then you are probably good to go. Probably the best way to go about it would be to suggest going out as two couples. Who knows - you may make 2 new friends!

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[pingpong99]

Thks Angel I was thinking about that also , I think the 2 couples would be the way to go .She is very busy with the 2 kids and have little money to go out, same on our side with the money.I guess that would not stop us on visiting each others places.
I am not sure if her boyfriend would like the extra friendship to his girl though , my girlfriend already knows I told her she was very pretty .
I will leave it as is for now but have a wait and see who knows , I think u have a very smart answer thks again.

 

[Tracy]

Even if there is a lack of money to go out on a "double-date" You can do so many other things that does not cost money. If you have a child friendly home, why not invite the two of them over for dinner, beer and a movie? BYOB worse case senario (if eveyone is that broke) If you honestly just want to be friends with her, then I think that the whole gang can benefit. The kids get to visit a new place and break their routine (That is good for a kid as long as they are not having a bad day) And the adults get to spend time together talking like big people again (the work place does not count... trust me) as the kids keep themselves occupied in new surroundings. Also her and your GF will benefit, because it is nice to have a strong bond with some one who knows what your life is like... and who better than her friend from the office?

That is my two cents....

But, Never have any sexual relations with her (yes, a bj in the oval office is sexual... )

She works with your GF and is friends with her... MAJOR BETRAYAL.
There is no way I would ever be able to forgive my Fiance for such an act (and I still haven't and she was not my friend) I even ended up quitting my job because I felt so betrayed by my co-worker that every time I saw her at work I just wanted to beat her.


If you want to "play" on the side... That is what escorts are here for... You can play all you want and as that Charlie dude said "I pay her to leave" You also pay the girl to keep their mouths shut from the public under all circumsatnces... Much less chance of getting caught and even if you do... At least it is not some one she knows or is ever going to meet let alone have to see day in and day out at the office.

 

[ExoticSpirit]

If you really want to be friends with this girl, then it should be on a similar level as say with your guy friends. After all, you wouldn't even think about making out with any of your guy friends, right? This is how I have successfully maintained solid friendships with several women over the years. They know that friendship to me is genderless and therefore know that I would never hit on them. It sounds bad but I do treat many of my female friends as if they were one of the guys. And this has worked.

 

[master_bates]

Its VERY hard to be friends with someone you're attracted to VERY hard

Trust me

 

[ExoticSpirit]

That's why most of my female friends are not hotties in my mind. They area usually women that I would not even think of dating. So that works.

 

[pingpong99]

Thks for all replies I will keep it friendship only and in the future try some of the ideas like invites over for supper, small going-outs ,etc.
My girlfriend came back home Friday with her phone number in case we wanted to ask them out or over and vice versa.
So we will see how it goes , I think it is even easier to have girls be good friends with a guy they (girls) seem to be more honest.