Indy Companion
Ashley Madison

Thank you to all the providers who made me feel like a person

CydoniaNights

Member
Dec 7, 2018
89
73
18
Not really sure how to start this but I have been meaning to write this for a while but never took the time. When I first started seeing providers a little over 2 years ago I was in a bad place both emotionally and sexually. I am both introverted and suffer from social anxiety particularly with the opposite sex but not always exclusive to them. I did manage to get a girlfriend at one point in my life but it was short lived and a pure fluke. After we broke up my dating life was a joke a best ( barely getting to first dates, usually just end up getting ghosted or friendzoned) and at worst it was non existant. Casual sex was never an option for I never had the charisma nor the confidence to have it happen. For 3 years I went without sex. Obviously when you’re a virgin it’s not a big deal except for the curiosity of what it must be life and the eventual social stigma of taking to long to lose it. But since I already lost it to my ex, when you suddenly lose access to something so great like sex, it becomes a much bigger deal than if you never experienced it in the first place. Eventually I grew so sexually frustrated that I started looking into the world of escorting and seeing if it was a viable option to get laid. Obviously as you all know, it is and I decided to bite the bullet and give it a try.

I never went into the hobby expecting to experience what I have over the years. I thought that at most I would get the chance to sleep with a 9 or 10 that be uninterested and disconnected, kick me out as soon as I finish and basically just treat me like an obstacle that she needs to get past to finish her day. Ironically this is exactly what my first session was and surprisingly I didn’t even leave dissapointed. Pro tip guys, if you expect nothing great you can’t be dissapointed. I never reviewed this girl nor do I plan to. Although my first experience was less than ideal, I got what I came for and as a whole was satisfied. I knew it would never be like being with a girlfriend, or someone that liked you or cared about you, how could it right? Im so glad I was wrong.

The sex was good enough for me to be willing to partake in the hobby again. This time with someone else in hopes to have a better experience, but again I kept my expectations low. I went to see someone who at the time was very active on Merb and somewhat popular. She had a decent rep and was also one of the most beautiful women I ever laid eyes on. Her name was Natalie Summers and she was my first good experience in this hobby. She seems to now be retired with no hints that she will come back, but I hope wherever she is, whatever she is doing, I hope she is in good health and living a happy retirement because she was a very special provider and I would jump at the opportunity to meet her again if she ever returns to the hobby. Natalie was the first provider that made me feel like a person. She was interested in my goals, experiences and life. She made me confortable, took care of me sexually with enthusiasm and for the first time since my gf, I felt comfortable around a woman who I wanted to be intimate with. She was also the first woman to ever compliment me sexually. She admired my penis like it was a work of art. I never thought I would experience that in my life. Since than I have been showered with compliments about my member by many poviders, to the point where I am actually starting to believe it might be true and not just providers trying to be kind. Even if it’s a lie some lies are worth believing.

After natalie I went on to see dozens of girls, with a good chunk of them being reviewed by me on this board. Although not all my sessions were good like my session with Natalie (some were actually better, but Natalie will always hold a special place cause she was the first great session I had), the majority were fantastic experiences. Each one special in their own way but the one thing all my good experiences had in common is they treated me as a person. They were interested in me, they made me feel good about myself ( you have no idea how nice it feels to be complimented on your looks, or how you speak or smile, how you have sex, especially when you never receive these compliments. I have learned to appreciate myself more physically thanks to these amazing providers. Apparently I have a really nice butt, who would have thought? Not me, but it seems to be a common compliment I get from many providers so at this point can it really be a lie? I doubt it.

Another thing that is so great about so many providers is their easy going ness. They don’t judge me or are impatient with me. They make me feel like I am all that matters for the time I have with them. I feel like they enjoy my company or at the very least act like it.

So many providers are compassionate and understanding of my shortcomings sexually. I am by no means great in bed ( ok at best) I even suffer from PE on the regular ( but not always). Yet I never feel like a bad lover because they always find something to compliment me on or act like it’s no big deal. I always get comments like “ you actually lasted longer than most men” or “ it doesn’t matter it was still fun and we can always go again”.

This is getting pretty long so I’m gonna wrap it up. To all the providers I have seen I just want to say thank you for treating me like a person, making me feel good about myself, relieving my anxiety with women, helping me improve sexually, making me appreciate things about my looks and personality, helping me open up as a person becoming a better conversationalist ( I apologize for all the awkward moments of silence we shared where I didn’t know what to say) and of course having the opportunity to share intimate moments with such talented, beautiful and compassionate women. I can only imagine how mentally taxing it must be to do this so thanks for treating me so well. When I started this hobby I thought it would just be some temporary thing I would do on occasion to get my rocks off until I found a new gf. But really it’s become a way for me to meet amazing women, have great sexual experiences and approve my social skills and confidence. Although I am by no means the charisma king, I am leagues better socially, suffer less anxiety and far less shy in my personal life thanks to my experiences in the hobby so another big thank you to all the girls who helped me indirectly or directly improve myself and gave me the confidence to do so.

Thanks for reading
 

What's My Name

What's My Name
Mar 16, 2014
732
207
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Montreal
CydoniaNights kinda of in the same boat with the shortcomings at times. But yeah the ladies I met too have been tremendous, some not so, but it's a small number. They make me feel like a King even if.
On my part thank you to the ladies who I have met and made me feel like I was the most
important
person.
 

sene5hos

Well-Known Member
Dec 26, 2019
4,510
6,605
113
For my part, thank you to the ladies I met and who made me feel like I was the most important person.

For me too, these ladies were and are important in my life. It's probably for this reason that I made the decision to only meet ladies who have reviews on this site.

I remember as if it was yesterday the first woman I met after my separation.

She wasn't an escort, but an erotic masseuse. After the session as I was the last client (oh yes, I was scared), she kept me in the living room, and we chatted.
I came home and slept like a baby.

Thank you ladies, sometimes you have to be in addition to masseuses, escorts, women who listen, advise, psychologists what.
 

What's My Name

What's My Name
Mar 16, 2014
732
207
43
52
Montreal
Also the ladies being very nice and receptive with us it's also that, I believe that most of us act like gentlemen and the ladies like that. I met and SP, found her by accident and now she is my ATF, with me she is a totally amazing lady, when we meet it's like we were good friends in a past life or it can be that we just clicked while just me trying to have a meeting with her.
 

Anwar

Active Member
Jan 6, 2020
97
111
33
Montreal
I am impressed by how sympathetic and open-minded most SPs are, at least, the ones I've seen advertising in Merb and their Twitter coterie. No bias against ethnicity, physical ability, appearance; the only requirement being good old decency. In this polarized and confrontational world, SPs provide a safe space for many. I long for the day when this profession, which has redeemed the self-esteem of many men and empowered many women, will no longer be stigmatized.
 

punky9999

Member
Feb 17, 2019
69
33
18
Wow, an amazing post, Cydonia, and a great thread! I agree with so much of what you said. The confidence gain is real; and it seeps into other areas of your life too! The SPs I've seen have completely changed my life, no exaggeration. It feels amazing to feel wanted, or at least made to feel like you are wanted. We humans need that in our core, I think. My only regret is I wish I'd started all this sooner :)

I envy you all that call Montreal home. It has been rough being unable to visit with the borders closed.

Anwar, I really loved your post also. Here's to the hobby losing its stigma someday soon, and providers getting the respect they deserve.

In short, thank you to all the ladies that choose this profession. It's a job for you, but you do more for us than you could ever know . . . thank you.
 
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sene5hos

Well-Known Member
Dec 26, 2019
4,510
6,605
113
Wow, an amazing post, Cydonia, and a great thread! I agree with so much of what you said. The confidence gain is real; and it seeps into other areas of your life too! The SPs I've seen have completely changed my life, no exaggeration. It feels amazing to feel wanted, or at least made to feel like you are wanted. We humans need that in our core, I think. My only regret is I wish I'd started all this sooner :)

I envy you all that call Montreal home. It has been rough being unable to visit with the borders closed.

Anwar, I really loved your post also. Hears to the hobby losing its stigma someday soon, and providers getting the respect they deserve.

In short, thank you to all the ladies that choose this profession. It's a job for you, but you do more for us than you could ever know . . . thank you.

Punky9999, your post is also very good.

Yes all these ladies don't have the recognition they deserve.

One of my nieces worked in the field when she was a university student.
It has come to be known, and since that time she is the black sheep of the family, and many have not understood anything, and since that time no longer speaks to her.

Even recently the escort that I see has completely change my life.
 

Numerati

Well-Known Member
Nov 2, 2009
1,312
261
83
With all the dinner dates I went on in this hobby every single one of them were very worthwhile experiences. Not even one was a disappointment in anyway. Definitely can't say the same on the civilian ones. That says it all.

I would wine and dine when I was in the hobby. No way I would do that with every civie girl for sure. Maybe a year or two down the road if we last that long but wouldn't pull that off on the first meeting.
 
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sene5hos

Well-Known Member
Dec 26, 2019
4,510
6,605
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That is sad that she was “shunned”. Do you still talk to her? I feel your support would mean a great deal to her.

Thank you for your empathy, AwesomeKitten.

It would be the same for me, if my family knew that I saw escorts.

Yes we talk to each other from time to time. She is now doing her masters, she has a boyfriend who takes care of her.
 

DrJ_TheGhost

Active Member
Mar 6, 2019
117
79
28
It would be the same for me, if my family knew that I saw escorts.

Yes we talk to each other from time to time. She is now doing her masters, she has a boyfriend who takes care of her.

Glad to heat you still have a relationship with her. Good luck and congrats on her pursuing a masters degree. Hope she goes all the way with a PhD.
One day people will stop seeing this as a “bad” job. It is like a great therapy session provided by the ladies.
 

sene5hos

Well-Known Member
Dec 26, 2019
4,510
6,605
113
Glad to heat you still have a relationship with her. Good luck and congrats on her pursuing a masters degree. Hope she goes all the way with a PhD.
One day people will stop seeing this as a “bad” job. It is like a great therapy session provided by the ladies.

If all the men were as nice as you on this site would be really nice, because I always say what I think, and sometimes I get put in my place.

Thank you very much and good luck.
 
Ashley Madison