Wanted to share a story of a close friend of mine and wanted opinions to those who've

[Johnny]

Wanted to share a story of a close friend of mine and wanted opinions to those who've experienced the same with losing their virginity if they have to an SP.

My friend's experience dates back to adolescent and early 20's years.

For myself personally I was a bit late at 18yrs old in highschool with my high school sweetie and have dated many other women since then and had a few experiences with SP's that were really great.

But my friend had a much harder time than I did growing up. He was and still is a tall, muscular well built good looking guy with an honest and fun personality.

He was rather shy when a teenager around women. For a long time he was either rejected on the spot, or burned in the bedroom (you'll know why in a moment).

By the age of 23yrs old, he was still a virgin. He came to the conclusions that the women who rejected him on the spot could tell he was a virgin as he was shy and sometimes nervous around them. And when he did manage to bring a female home or to their house for fun, they'd figure out he was a virgin within the first 5-10mins.

They'd want to leave on the spot and wouldn't return his phone calls.

This was still happening to him at 21 and 23yrs old. I tried to help set him up with women on my behalf that I knew but the virgin aspect always came up and the girls would come to me asking me why I set them up with a virgin?

I said that I set them up with my buddy b/c he's a good guy who won't f#ck you over and not an a$$hole.

I attempted to give him advice on how to be around women like being aloof, confident but not too cocky, don't be affraid to flirt and compliment them in a playful and even a dirty jokingly way (some women enjoy this but not all), be a gentleman, humorous and so on. I even gave him sexual tips on how to turn them on and so on while in the sac.

But the advice didn't seem to work for him the way it has many times worked for me with the opposite sex. The girls could just seem to tell he was a virgin and were practically repulsed by the thought of doing a vigin.

Finally my friend was fed up of everything and wanted to gain some sexual experience at all costs.

At this time I was dating a 6ft brunette from Pittsburgh who was attending Concordia b/c it was cheaper. We were together for a year and a half when I first met her. I knew she would eventually have to move back home after school. The day came and we sadly had to say our good bye's.

So I called up my buddy with the dillema and 2 of our other single friends I had played football with to take a trip to Chambly.

It was the first time any of us had ever been to GP. We went in and saw about 8 gorgeous women there and sat down for some Perrier as we weren't big drinkers being into the gym and all.

My friend was quite nervous so I asked him if he saw someone he liked the looks of and he pointed to a really elegant lady. So I went over to talk to her and told her my friend was nervous and wanted to go in the booth with her. She came over to my friend and asked him to come with her.

My 2 friends and I were smiling and happy for him. Then we all picked a lady we liked and went into private.

About 25mins later give or take, we all returned to our tables for another drink with big smiles on our faces.

Our shy friend looked like a completely new man, relaxed, confident, and more assertive.

We stayed for one more drink of Perrier and we each said good bye to the ladies we had gone into the back with.

In the car we asked my friend what happened and he said "everything" LOL with a big relaxed smile on his face. Even though we could read his expression, we still asked him how he felt at that moment.

He said like someone totally different. I took my friend back a few more times to GP, and he later wanted to try an agency to have an experience in his own room at home.

After a few months he began to become much more relaxed around girls. They seemed to be much more attracted to him at this point. He even went to bed with one of the girls who rejected him on the spot several months earlier.

He later dated a girl for about 2yrs that walked out on him in the bedroom who found out he was a virgin.

Why is it that some women can be shallow this way?

I was a virgin at 18yrs old, and my highschool sweet heart already lost hers before me and still wanted to be with me.

I'd like to hear some opinions on this story I share with you.

I always thought that if you find the right person who you're attracted to and vice versa, than it wouldn't matter who's a virgin? At least in an ideal world LOL.

I wish you all a great day.

 

[Johnny]

well ive always had a thing about blokes losing there viginity to an sp...cause when they look back, they didnt know her real name and as "annalee" ive had a few blokes in that state...damn!!!!!!!!! it was hard to handle meaning i felt it was wrong(weird i know)...

but seems in this case i was wrong...the fact hes a great bloke and ladies ran for the hills is rather sad...on behalf of the female race...i apologise...poor thing

but sounds like a happy ending for him...guess it worked...

i remember having a young bloke who booked me thru my old agency and i almost had to get him drunk he was so nervous(its true you can tell)...i talked to him and decided that hed be better off to wait...he emailed me a few months later thanking me cause he found the lady of his dreams...smiling

annalee

I thank you for your opinions, it's nice to see a woman's point of view on this.
I think it is pretty sad that some women would actually leave a guy
"hanging" like that in embarassment.

So from a woman's perspective, you really can tell if the guy is a virgin most of the time?

My high school sweetie already knew I was a virgin, but she said I didn't act like one as I was confident, out going, a "little bit" and I stress little bit cocky, humorous and fun. Although I did only last 5mins with her my first time LOL. Now I can last anywhere from 40-60mins on good days which is a big improvement I guess.

But yes it did turn out for him quite well. He's single at the moment, but has a couple of lady friends and one of them he's trying to settle down with as he's nearing 30yrs old.

Honestly speaking, nerves have a lot to do with it as it's full of anxiety. B/c of thyroid problems, I have to take a light anxiety medication which have allowed me to be completely relaxed with encounters of the opposite sex.

If an man is not relaxed, the blood vessels in his member won't relax to open up to allow blood flow. Sometimes it's a pain having such a tool LOL.

But I personally thank you and other SP's who encounter virgins for being so understanding and not making them feel bad as I think of what my friend went through growing up.

 

[Johnny]

I've had a similar experience or two where in my sexual beginnings, i seemed to strike out with women i'd make advances to. I figured they could tell just by my demeanor/awkwardness that i was inexperienced. I suppose that for women who are experienced, going to bed with a very inexperienced man isn't too thrilling and doesn't help maintain or improve their 'status' among other peers. For men, it's totally the opposite....some spend a lifetime seeking that elusive virgin. Yes, you could say that the doc hasn't exactly struck oil in that department either.

When i first lost my virginity, it was a great load off my shoulders, of course. I then went on a fornicating binge, so to speak. And did i ever! Well, among my so-called conquests during that binge were two of the women aforementionned who had flatly rejected my previous advances. I remembered those rejections well and they hadn't exactly made me feel good about myself. A simple, polite 'no, thank you' might have been appropriate instead of making you feel like you were the first-cousin to the black plague! Well, i had my revenge a couple of years later, so to speak. During my fornicating binge, these two women had come up to me on a different night, and just by their body language, i could tell that it would be easy. I went to bed a couple of times with each of them, and when it was time to move on to somebody else, i told each of them that i was sorry, but it just wasn't working out, and that i had decided to move on. These two girls were lookers and probably had never been rejected or dumped before. Surprised and somewhat hurt by the turn of events, they wondered why i was behaving this way. "Just call it getting even", i told them. They seemed bewildered and asked me what i was talking about. "Remember a couple of years ago when i made a pass at you at a party and you practically ridiculed me? Well, i never forgot how awful you made me feel." They knew exactly what i meant and one of them actually apologized for the way she had acted that time and even mentionned that she didn't blame me for being offended back then. The good side of all this is that i wound up becoming good friends with the both of them for a certain period of my life. We had burried the hatchet, so to speak. Ah, how 25 years can fly by so quickly!!

As for your buddy, i'm glad to see that he has had sexual relations with non-sps after losing his virginity. Spending your whole life strictly having sex with paid providers isn't normal and probably self-destructive in some capacity. Having sex with someone you know and care for is totally different than having sex with a stranger you're paying to have sex with you. It is much more fullfilling and great for self-confidence. I've had half as much non-sp sexual partners in my lifetime (as compared to sps) and i still cherish the memories dearly, even if many of them turned out to be one-night stands. As for the ones i've had as a hobbyist, i tend to forget them and they don't seem very real to me. I also perform much differently in bed, almost to a point where it seems like it's not even me, but a somewhat distant person who is playing a role. And when the young lady bids goodbye and leaves, the fantasy is over and we're back to reality, with not much left to show for the money spent. Pretty much the same thing as putting $200 into a slot machine and not winning anything, you could say...except remembering that you inserted all those coins in the machine, never to be seen again....and wondering why the hell you threw all that money away for nothing. You ask yourself: "Was it worth it?" Anyone has his own answer to that question.

Well I too can relate to some of these experiences as prior to dating my high school babe, I was rejected also for being a virgin at 15 or 17yrs old. But at 18yrs old, my high school sweetie didn't care as she liked me for me.

But she also said that I didn't act like a typical virgin. I payed close attention to how other men would talk, approach, and interact with women and I added those characteristics to my own personality.

I do agree that sex with someone you care about, even a fuck friend can be more meaningful than with an SP. But sometimes your hormones are raging and you go through dry spells in the dating scene and you just have to make a call.


I'm not a hobbyist if you will. I just make calls every now and again as I have a couple of female friends (non-SP) that I see, but sometimes I like a variety.


But I truly am looking for that one to settle down with. I have to be physically attracted to her, and I also have to be attracted to her personality.

Hopefully soon the right person will come along.

I'm just glad for my friend, going to GP and gaining some sexual experience was the best thing for him I think as it gave him alot more confidence.

 

[Johnny]

I feel the same way. For the past 3 years, i've only been dabbling in the scene and i'm a spur-of-the-moment hobbyist for the same reasons you stated above. If i do happen to see someone in the biz, it's usually a rare regular, someone i enjoy spending time with...sex probably has nothing to do with it, but it's the excuse we use to be able to meet up & catch up on things, you could say. As for the thrill of getting on the phone and making calls to see who's available, it's still there...but more often than not, i volunteer to do it for some friends who are either too shy to do it themselves or they don't have the patience for this.

Are you still with your common law wife if you don't mind me asking? Just make sure you don't get caught, it wouldn't be worth it IMO.

I know that when I find that significant other, knowing my track record I won't be calling SP's.

If I'm seeing ppl that I'm not really into for the long term deal, I won't mind having some extra fun with an SP once in awhile. But my past relationships (long term that is), I haven't needed to call SP's as I was just so into that one person and the sex was hot enough.

That's the thing, I won't get along with someone who doesn't have interest or a sex drive as high as mine. I can last about 40-60mins in the sac with a woman on a good day w/o cumming and I can do it almost anytime except if I'm really tired from the gym, exams or work.

Back to my previous story & what you just posted....my first steady gf (and eventually common-law wife) originated from Mtl. She was the sole reason why i discovered Mtl, actually. Well, after dating for a week, we finally did the deed. Actually, i was so nervous and wanting it so much to be perfect that it took me 2 weeks to be able to 'perform' to acceptable standards. And when i finally got going, oh boy! This thing would be ready to go 24 hrs a day, 7 days a week! Anyways, i noticed after the first couple of times that my gf looked kind of depressed. I asked her what was wrong, and she told me that she realized that i wasn't a virgin as she first had suspected, and was kind of disappointed about this, since she was hoping that i was a virgin and she'd be able to teach me everything (very limited, in my estimate) she knew. At that moment, i wished so much that i wouldn't have been in such a hurry to lose my virginity!

I was just curious, what gave her the impression you were a virgin in the first place?

Well it looks as though you certainly got lucky finding a woman who was into being with a virgin.

I wish my buddy was fortunate enough to have that experience, but he was not. But in the end he'll be okay as he's trying to develop a new long term deal with one of his f#ck buddies and I think she may be into it.

 

[Nugie]

Why is it that some women can be shallow this way?

Because in this modern age of equal opportunity, they're trying to catch up to us.

Here is a short list of reasons (excuses) I have used to get rid of chicks:

1) Strangely shaped mole on her arm. I would play with it and she would yell at me. Oh yeah? Get the fuck out.
2) Never farted in front of me, I felt she was too self conscious.
3) Her car smelled funny. Like someone cooked fish in it.
4) She wore a strange shade of lipstick once, I thought it was brown, she argued about it. Well, then, get the fuck out.
5) Would always cry after sex (at first I thought this was hot)
6) Too liberal
7) Too conservative
8) Always wanted me to hang out with her friends, and one of them was fat and annoying.
9) Always wanted me to hang out with her really hot friends, and got mad when I mentioned that she had really hot friends.
10) (friend of #9) Got mad that I always brought up the fact that we were only dating since I broke up with her friend, because I told ex that she had hot friends.
11) Obsessive about proper shoes and/or matching socks. I don't care if my shoes are brown and my belt is black. We were 20 and in college and all of us were broke. Stop bitching at me, or get the fuck out.

So, in the interest of fairness... I think men still take the cake when it comes to being shallow for extremely stupid things.

 

[Johnny]

I haven't been with the one i've mentionned earlier for almost 15 years. Another came later, and that relationship lasted 4 years. I used to feel the same way that you do regarding sex drive compatibility. However, in the last few years, i've realized that sex isn't as important as it used to be for me.....there is a lot more to a successful relationship than just sex. It probably has to do with age, maturity, and sexual experience. You see, when you've been in this biz for as long as i've been, you've pretty much fullfilled every sexual fantasy that you've dreamed about. There comes a time when all of this gets boring after a while and you're looking for new challenges. And when you happen to meet someone that you not only click in bed with, but also on the personality/chemistry level, you start to realize that you've missed this part all along (but denied it) and you begin to cherish past memories involving former girlfriends or wives, when things were going good. As for what gave her the impression that i was a virgin, who knows. Back then, i wasn't the same person that i later became and i was fairly naive and innocent, so to speak. Remember that movie 'Revenge of the Nerds'? Well, that was me until i reached the last couple years of high school & eventually university. Young Clark Kent then turned into Bluto (Animal House), then into a quasi Rocco Siffredi, which was fueled by the fact i had become somewhat of a local celebrity for a couple of years, got involved in several failed brief relationships, discovered the hobby by accident and kind of fell over his head into it, made a lot of friends while in it, discovered moderation, and the rest is history. Oh yeah...i made a decision to remain single for as long as i'd be connected to the hobby. So you can say that i've been single for the past 6-7 years...but have dated several women on and off since, but didn't allow it to get serious since i would have had to put a stop to my regular trips to Mtl. The two cannot mix, and i still love Mtl too much and care too much about my many friends that i've made over the years.

See here's the thing, I totally agree with you and that's where I'm at in my life.

I'm looking for the one I'm physically attracted to, who has a personality I'm attracted to, and sexually compatible with.

It all has to work together insync. You can't have 1 or 2 out of 3 (what I just mentioned above) or it won't work.

I was with this girl who I greatly cared about for about 3yrs. I even moved to the west island for 2yrs to commit to her. I'm not saying it was all her fault, but I'd only get to see her 4x's per month living just 5mins away by car. I moved away from friends in the south shore to be closer to her.

The first year and a half was very good then it started to decline. She began to make me feel guilty for wanting to be physical. So it was only once a month for a long time and she said I was just the same as the other guys after the things I did for her and her family.

Anyway the next woman I am with will have to have those 3 characteristics. If we match 3 out of 3, than I won't be bored with her including sexually.

 

[Johnny]

Well as you have read, my friend was shy around women so they most likely immediately assumed he was a virgin which obviously turned them off.

Then the women who did try to hook up with him found out he was a virgin in bed and left him there like that as they were repulsed by the fact that he was a virgin and they couldn't do it.

I know when I was in highschool in the early and mid 90's, the girls in my higschool didn't want to bang a guy unless he had already banged at least 4 girls. I don't want to sound mean or disrespectful to women, but on more than one incident, girls confided in me this very fact.

I to had been rejected for being a virgin at 15 and 17yrs old until I met my high school sweetie in grade 11 at 18yrs old (started elementary school a year late b/c of my b-day and moving in case you're wondering).


But yes I agree, it was definitely a good thing for my bud at GP in the back. By the 4th time he went back, he confided in me that he felt so much more relaxed around women and hasn't really had problems since then.


Forgive me if I sound harsh, mean or disrespectful here, but if for some reason my future son hasn't found a girlfriend by 18 or 19yrs old, I will personally arange a meeting with an SP for him so he won't face the same problems that my friend did up until the age of 23yrs old.

Some individuals can be permanently scarred (luckily my bud wasn't) and I wouldn't want my son to go through that.

 

[Johnny]

Because in this modern age of equal opportunity, they're trying to catch up to us.

Here is a short list of reasons (excuses) I have used to get rid of chicks:

1) Strangely shaped mole on her arm. I would play with it and she would yell at me. Oh yeah? Get the fuck out.
2) Never farted in front of me, I felt she was too self conscious.
3) Her car smelled funny. Like someone cooked fish in it.
4) She wore a strange shade of lipstick once, I thought it was brown, she argued about it. Well, then, get the fuck out.
5) Would always cry after sex (at first I thought this was hot)
6) Too liberal
7) Too conservative
8) Always wanted me to hang out with her friends, and one of them was fat and annoying.
9) Always wanted me to hang out with her really hot friends, and got mad when I mentioned that she had really hot friends.
10) (friend of #9) Got mad that I always brought up the fact that we were only dating since I broke up with her friend, because I told ex that she had hot friends.
11) Obsessive about proper shoes and/or matching socks. I don't care if my shoes are brown and my belt is black. We were 20 and in college and all of us were broke. Stop bitching at me, or get the fuck out.

So, in the interest of fairness... I think men still take the cake when it comes to being shallow for extremely stupid things.

Well all of these can actually happen LOL so I'm sure some guys have not needed to use these as excuses but the truth.