Finding your pubic persona
By Lee-Anne Peluk
Vaginas – like hairstyles – come in all shapes, colours and sizes and with many nicknames. The idea of this nasty column is to take some of the best nicknames for the female genitals and match them up with some of my favorite hairstyles.
Many women prefer to leave their bush alone – the untamed pubic coif, but others style their pubic hair like the hair on their head and give it an identity. Both styles, of groomed and not so groomed, are interesting and unique to the women who don the different looks.
There is also a matter of expectation — would you expect a woman with a head of big curly hair to have her pubic hair trimmed to a pixie-style haircut? I wouldn’t — I would expect her box to be as bushy and proud as the hair on her head.
But let’s look at some of the different pubic coifs out there.
The Pixie-pussy
Many people don’t like the name pussy — but what is really so bad about it? Cats are great — they are loyal, independent, soft and cuddly. So are women who trim their pubic hair into the purrfect pixie-pussy hairstyle. Popular amongst nude models, the pixie-pussy is the pubic hair that is trimmed quite short — like the popular 1960s haircut.
Stylish, yet practical, this pubic coif screams, "I’m hot, I’m happening, I like to be in control of all my bodily functions."
The Heart-Shaped Box
Inspired by the early ‘90s popularization of grunge fashion and grunge music, the Heart-Shaped Box is perfect for Nirvana lovers and Nirvana seekers alike.
The woman with the heart shaped box may or may not change the color of her pubic hair to match the style, but will always shave a heart into it.
The heart shaped box says, "I love to rock n’ roll, I’m wild and lots of fun, and one day I will find that special someone — but I’m not going to look too hard."
The Bushy Box
The bush is popular among women who have so much style that it would be a waste of time to style their pubes. It oozes out of every pore, so why fuck with nature?
Characteristics of the bushy box include long, extra curly and extra protective pubic hair. It is the hair that has been growing since puberty, and its length and coarseness vary from woman to woman.
The bush screams, "Mother Nature has given me elegance in all her infinite wisdom and I respect that I want to keep my vagina warm and cozy. I’m bushy and I’m beautiful."
The Strip Snatch
This pubic coif was inspired by art, but has proven to be a major influence in the world of print pornography.
The Strip Snatch is a straight line of pubic hair trimmed short like the pixie pussy, but taken in from triangular to form a simple line. The woman who sports the strip has a taste for the understatement — she likes half a glass of wine and half of her natural pubic hair.
The strip laments, "I am an artist and my body is the easel — I love line, and I’m not afraid to let my lover know."
The Honourary Mullet
The mullet, although a popular ‘80s hockey hairstyle, is not a sought after female pubic style. It does happen to every woman who has ever sported long hair.
When a woman with some length up there takes a shower, it is inevitable that she will loose some of her hair to the drain.
Its chosen path is usually down the back and right into the ass crack, where it can be collected and deposited in the bin of choice.
Next time you wash your hair, take note of the brief moment when the hair in your crack is longer than your pubic hair. These truly precious moments are your body’s own interpretation of the classic hockey hairstyle — short in the front but long in the back.
