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Thread: “High risk” Gentlemen/Ladies and health concerns of the sex industry

  1. #1
    Your little Secret! Miss Cloe's Avatar
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    Arrow “High risk” Gentlemen/Ladies and health concerns of the sex industry

    [COLOR=``Navy``]I’m totally blown away by something that happened today. I cannot help but have major doubts about my safety and health while being involved in the sex industry. Let me explain:

    I was contacted, via msn chat, today by a very nice Gentleman. We chatted for quite some time and really enjoyed the conversation until we started talking about some of his past and present unsafe sexual practices.

    I will not go into details about our conversation but the Gentleman openly admitted to partaking in unprotected sex with others (not SPs) in his “regular” SINGLE sex life. I couldn’t believe what I was reading.

    After being informed of this, because we had agreed to meet in Toronto on my next up coming visit, I politely told him that I would still see him but would not offer him the full GFE “service”; I would only accept the rendez-vous on the condition of a safe GFE session because of his unsafe practices and not because I’m an “YMMV” Companion.
    I care about my health and the one of others and I will not gamble my life away for a night of pleasure because to me, this Gentleman is “high risk” whether he says he is clean or not… Even with papers to prove his statement.

    Although I really appreciate the gentleman’s honesty, before our rendez-vous, thank you, I’m still upset at the fact that the people who choose to practice unsafe sex are not understanding of other people who choose to always practice safe sex because of course, the Gentleman declined my condition for the rendez-vous.

    I would like to say, to everyone, if you choose to practice unprotected sex, do not ask other people to join you in your Russian roulette game. My life and other people’s life don’t belong in your hands. Ask for a CJB out of respect for me and others to limit the risks. Play unsafe with the ones that choose to do so!

    If you choose not to ask for a CBJ, at least let your SP(s) know about your unsafe practices and give her the choice of accepting or declining the rendez-vous on her terms, just like my Gentleman did. Once again, thank you for your honesty!

    I have a few questions for you;

    Is it fair to expect a from an SP when you don’t always play safe when having sex with others, even if the risk of transmitting HIV (IF positive) is very minimal through oral sex?… Even if you got tested 4-5-6-12-20-52-1000 weeks ago and always had negative results but still keep practicing unsafe sex because you have been negative so far! Lol

    What motivates you to partake in unprotected sex? The temporary “feel good sensation”? What about the real risks? Isn’t that a factor in your decision making? Do you think about the effect it could have on someone else’s life if you were positive and didn’t know about it and transmitted something serious like HIV?
    I`m not asking about the effects it could have on your own life because it doesn`t seem that you care about the issue.

    All this has made me a bit paranoid about the fact that I might be seeing gentlemen who practice unsafe sex and don’t tell me. It is making me reconsider my position as a GFE Companion.

    I don’t know if it’s ok to make a request of this sort on the board but I would much appreciate if Gentlemen who choose to partake in unprotected sex, whether it’d be with any SP or a woman, a man or a couple, etc, to please NOT contact me for an intimate rendez-vous!
    When I share s with you, I would appreciate if I could enjoy it with Gentlemen who ALWAYS practice safe sex!


    No matter how you look at it, this unsafe behavior (not just this one in particular) could affect us all, one day or another![/COLOR]


    [COLOR=``DarkOrchid``][SIZE=``3``][FONT=``Garamond``]Cloe xox[/FONT][/SIZE][/COLOR]

    PS.
    [COLOR=``Navy``]My definition of safe sex is not: I guess I’ve been lucky so far![/COLOR]

  2. #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by Miss Cloe
    I’m totally blown away by something that happened today. I cannot help but have major doubts about my safety and health while being involved in the sex industry. Let me explain:

    I was contacted, via msn chat, today by a very nice Gentleman. We chatted for quite some time and really enjoyed the conversation until we started talking about some of his past and present unsafe sexual practices.

    I will not go into details about our conversation but the Gentleman openly admitted to partaking in unprotected sex with others (not SPs) in his “regular” SINGLE sex life. I couldn’t believe what I was reading.

    After being informed of this, because we had agreed to meet in Toronto on my next up coming visit, I politely told him that I would still see him but would not offer him the full GFE “service”; I would only accept the rendez-vous on the condition of a safe GFE session because of his unsafe practices and not because I’m an “YMMV” Companion.
    I care about my health and the one of others and I will not gamble my life away for a night of pleasure because to me, this Gentleman is “high risk” whether he says he is clean or not… Even with papers to prove his statement.

    Although I really appreciate the gentleman’s honesty, before our rendez-vous, thank you, I’m still upset at the fact that the people who choose to practice unsafe sex are not understanding of other people who choose to always practice safe sex because of course, the Gentleman declined my condition for the rendez-vous.

    I would like to say, to everyone, if you choose to practice unprotected sex, do not ask other people to join you in your Russian roulette game. My life and other people’s life don’t belong in your hands. Ask for a CJB out of respect for me and others to limit the risks. Play unsafe with the ones that choose to do so!

    If you choose not to ask for a CBJ, at least let your SP(s) know about your unsafe practices and give her the choice of accepting or declining the rendez-vous on her terms, just like my Gentleman did. Once again, thank you for your honesty!

    I have a few questions for you;

    Is it fair to expect a from an SP when you don’t always play safe when having sex with others, even if the risk of transmitting HIV (IF positive) is very minimal through oral sex?… Even if you got tested 4-5-6-12-20-52-1000 weeks ago and always had negative results but still keep practicing unsafe sex because you have been negative so far! Lol

    What motivates you to partake in unprotected sex? The temporary “feel good sensation”? What about the real risks? Isn’t that a factor in your decision making? Do you think about the effect it could have on someone else’s life if you were positive and didn’t know about it and transmitted something serious like HIV?
    I`m not asking about the effects it could have on your own life because it doesn`t seem that you care about the issue.

    All this has made me a bit paranoid about the fact that I might be seeing gentlemen who practice unsafe sex and don’t tell me. It is making me reconsider my position as a GFE Companion.

    I don’t know if it’s ok to make a request of this sort on the board but I would much appreciate if Gentlemen who choose to partake in unprotected sex, whether it’d be with any SP or a woman, a man or a couple, etc, to please NOT contact me for an intimate rendez-vous!
    When I share s with you, I would appreciate if I could enjoy it with Gentlemen who ALWAYS practiced safe sex!


    No matter how you look at it, this unsafe behavior (not just this one in particular) could affect us all, one day or another!



    Cloe xox

    PS.
    My definition of safe sex is not: I guess I’ve been lucky so far!
    Hello Cloe,

    I really don`t understand why you are shocked. One poll on another board showed 38% of clients have had unprotected sex with escorts. Then there is the simple fact that clients gravitating to this industry would more naturally be risk takers than those who don`t. Obviously this is far from a chaste world of monogamous moral citizens. So while I deeply empathize with your feelings, I wonder why this is news.

    Cheers,

    Korbel
    Korbie: of the Boston Red Sox Nation...the NBA Champion Boston Celtics Pride...and...the New England Patriots Dynasty!

  3. #3
    Your little Secret! Miss Cloe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Korbel
    Hello Cloe,

    I really don't understand why you are shocked. One poll on another board showed 38% of clients have had unprotected sex with escorts. Then there is the simple fact that clients gravitating to this industry would more naturally be risk takers than those who don't. Obviously this is far from a chaste world of monogamous moral citizens. So while I deeply empathize with your feelings, I wonder why this is news.

    Cheers,

    Korbel
    Korbel,

    With all due respect, I did not see the poll on another board and neither did I say it was news.
    I was just shocked at the fact that people don't seem to care about themselves, other people and life in general.


    Cloe xox

  4. #4
    I must say I totally agree with Miss Cloe. I also think that safety is very important in this industry but also in our own lives. I think the same way as she does. I'm also shocked when I see people preferring short term pleasure to being healthy.

    Thank you for your post Cloe. Maybe it will make more people reconsider unsafe sex.

    Angel
    xxx

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Miss Cloe
    Korbel,

    With all due respect, I did not see the poll on another board and neither did I say it was news.
    I was just shocked at the fact that people don't seem to care about themselves, other people and life in general.


    Cloe xox
    Hello Miss Cloe and JAG,

    Just place "BBFS poll" in the search on the blue board.

    Despite presumptions, you can't dismiss half of the input as T*ny. Now, when I first saw this poll, and the comments, I was only shocked by the percentages, not the fact that it happens often. Many threads on this subject have shown money is the motivating factor for the ladies and lust for the men. Put those two together and you have a very risky situation indeed. I voiced my disgust over this and was rebuffed with the basic attitude...well, you make your choice and others will make theirs. If it hadn't sunk in by now that there are a lot of selfish, careless "gentlemen" out there, then those still surprised by the depth of the carelessness haven't been paying close enough attention to what has been vividly expressed many times. I share your outrage, but not your surprise. If even one like me, who is repulsed by these activities, could let the idea of unprotected sex with an escort cross his mind for a moment, then what of others who really have few qualms.

    Sadly,

    Korbel
    Last edited by korbel; 09-17-2008 at 12:12 AM.
    Korbie: of the Boston Red Sox Nation...the NBA Champion Boston Celtics Pride...and...the New England Patriots Dynasty!

  6. #6
    I have had many guys ask me for BBFS and when they ask through email, I refuse to see them, when I am in the middle of action, I prefer to stop it there.

    I have also noticed this desire amongst guys I meet in my life and I am also extremely shocked!! This thought of having unprotected sex never came into my mind. Why risk it all for a couple moments of quivering? Complete stupidity, in my opinion.

    Lets have fun, Be SAFE!
    Smile and the world will smile with you

  7. #7
    Your little Secret! Miss Cloe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Miss Maria
    I have had many guys ask me for BBFS and when they ask through email, I refuse to see them, when I am in the middle of action, I prefer to stop it there.

    I have also noticed this desire amongst guys I meet in my life and I am also extremely shocked!! This thought of having unprotected sex never came into my mind. Why risk it all for a couple moments of quivering? Complete stupidity, in my opinion.

    Lets have fun, Be SAFE!
    Maria,

    Would you care to inform me and other SPs, via PM, about those men who make those requests, especially the ones who ask "during the middle of the action", as you put it, so I and everybody else can avoid accepting a rendez-vous with them?

    I guess Maria's (Divina) suggestion about a section for SPs would now be helpful to all of us who care about our health and for all of us who choose to practice SAFE sex!

  8. #8
    Your little Secret! Miss Cloe's Avatar
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    Question In better words?

    This is a quote by Korbel in another thread and on different issue that explains very clearly what I was trying to express about this specific issue:

    "Being an escort and dealing with all the complexities of that choice is a very personal matter that can have the most extreme consequences. In my view the possibilities of those consequences should never be exasperated by the choices of anyone else. Despite the choice of any lady to become an escort and take all the inherent risks, no one else has the right to increase those risks or any possible complications by making choices for the escort... Being an escort is the most delicate of positions and no one else should ever do anything to make the risks worse than she herself may wish to incur."

  9. #9
    I will bet you 100 dollars that every married or "partnered" man that we see has unprotected sex with their SO. I am not going to lie, I have a baby, I obviously had unprotected sex with my SO and still do. Why? because I know my self I am more of a risk factor than he is and I know I do not take chances where work is concerned. I also (really, this is true) Know where he is every second of every day. There fore he cannot contract something from some one else because he does not see anyone else.

    This should not concern clients as I do not practice unsafe sex with them and even if I did have something they would not be able to get it being that I play safe.

    If we were to cut all clients who practice unsafe sex in their "real" lives then that is half, if not more, of our clients GONE.

    What we have to do is protect ourselves and think of ourselves.
    Do not take chances were a negative consequence is not worth it.

    As I have said before and to all BBFS seekers... If the action has the remote possibility to affect my daughter in a negative fashion... Don't Ever think that I would be willing to throw her in front of a loaded gun.

    Simple. Think that every man is HIV positive and men PLEASE, Think the worse of the girl that you are seeing. Think that she has HIV as well.
    Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor in the morning
    Satan shudders and says "oh Shit....she's awake!!"







  10. #10
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    My take on this very serious topic. Sex in all it`s forms will always have risks. We all have our own comfort zones of assumed risks. While I always practice safe straight sex, I enjoy , DATY and Rimming, when I am offered. This is my personal comfort zone, and what risks I am willing to accept. I assume many SP`s are having unprotected or BBFS- with someone(hopefully, not clients). I am happy to accept either CBJ or from SP`s. but I will never cross that line into BBFS. I have never been offered BBFS, and if I did, I would decline, as it is my right to do so, just as it is the SP`s right to offer safe GFE, standard GFE or even BBFS. We all have our own ideas of acceptable risks and I hope we all can understand that some of these choices have a much higher risk. As clients we have the right of choice and even of refusal, I hope all SP`s know that they also have the right to refuse service to anyone that they don`t feel comfortable with for whatever reason.

    My view, is it is unrealistic for me to think that all people practice safe sex, even in this industry. I am not mad at people who get BBFS or offer BBFS, it is their choice. The best I can do is to stay away from people that don`t respect my personal comfort zone. For the record, I would never repeat with a SP that offered me BBFS. That is my choice.

  11. #11
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    Oh wow, sorry, I did not see Tracy's post right before mine. She says everything I was getting at and much better. Thank you Tracy for this honest view of how you feel about this topic.

  12. #12
    I appreciate the positive feed back... Thanks UHGL!
    Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor in the morning
    Satan shudders and says "oh Shit....she's awake!!"







  13. #13
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    Arrow

    Quote Originally Posted by Korbel
    Hello Miss Cloe and JAG,

    ... Many threads on this subject have shown money is the motivating factor for the ladies and lust for the men ... I share your outrage, but not your surprise.
    How many times in your life you got to finally have unprotected sex
    with someone you where with and get that the moment became special ?

    And you are saying that you are surprise it happens in a business when many
    times money is a motivation, people looking for more personal encounters and
    clients-girls having repeats and repeats rendez-vous ? Maybe not you, but think
    twice here ...

    I am shocked that you are but hopefully thinking that you are cause you
    didn't accept such situation. Otherwise, too many people have their head
    hide in a hole, a deep one !

    Here's the smartest thing to do:
    Quote Originally Posted by Tracy

    What we have to do is protect ourselves and think of ourselves.
    Do not take chances were a negative consequence is not worth it.
    And it's the only way to go


    Tracy, about the bet, too many men out there looking for '' that special moment '' ...

    I would certainely loose !
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  14. #14
    So Tracy just to play devil's advocate :

    Despite your assurances I'm not sure why I should feel any more comfortable about you having unprotected sex in your personal life than Miss Chloe is about John #12 having unprotected sex with his girlfiend or whatever.

    Without detailed knowledge of both situations don't you have to treat them as the same risk ? I mean how do I know your SO is any more monogamous or careful than Chloe's John's partner ? I don't.
    Last edited by Possum Trot; 09-17-2008 at 04:36 PM.

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Possum Trot
    So Tracy just to play devil's advocate :

    Despite your assurances I'm not sure why I should feel any more comfortable about you having unprotected sex in your personal life than Miss Chloe is about John #12 having unprotected sex with his girlfiend or whatever.

    Without detailed knowledge of both situations don't you have to treat them as the same risk ? I mean how do I know your SO is any more monogamous or careful than Chloe's John's partner ? I don't.
    Hello Possum Trot,

    We all know there are no guarantees of perfect safety inside or outside of the hobby. That is not what concerns me. Reasonable people in both areas do what they can to protect themselves and others from unnecessary risks. And by "unnecessary risk" I mean avoiding being frivolous about sexual contact where there is no monogamy. What does worry me is the fact that a significant percentage of clients and ladies are willing to engage in very risky behavior to satisfy their lust or profits respectively, thus making the situation more risky for us all. Is this new? Of course not. It's not even surprising that despite the elevated risks of sexual disease in the last 20 years it still goes on. Maybe those who are surprised somehow managed to still have faith in human nature that people would act more responsibly to protect themselves and others because they are still too young to realize that there is a certain strong persistence in human selfishness and stupidity that rarely if ever changes. Well ladies, that's the nature of the beast...it's ugly and it won't change. The best you can do is to protect yourself, because too many others don't have enough sense.

    Cheers,

    Korbel
    Korbie: of the Boston Red Sox Nation...the NBA Champion Boston Celtics Pride...and...the New England Patriots Dynasty!

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