Consent, Harrassment, and Abuse

[Noah Weber]

Hi Patron,

You raise interesting questions. My answer to this issue is simply that when one is with a sex worker, you have paid for the pleasure of the person's time and company, but that should not confer any sense of ownership. The person is not a possession, and one still has a responsibility to tune into the person's feelings. This does not mean that things need to be stagnant or complex. In fact, usually showing normal compassion makes things flow easier and leads to better sex.

 

[Noah Weber]

Hi Patron,

I don't think all John's fully recognize the importance of treating other people well. I do agree with you that things can't be taken to extremes, but because, there needs to be responsibility on both sides to show respect to the other. Keeping someones money when one doesn't want to engage in the relationship is disrespectful and would be taking advantage of the person. Compassion has to go both ways.

 

[hungry101]

I don't think all John's fully recognize the importance of treating other people well. .

Why do you assume that hobbyists do not treat these women well? What evidence do you have of this? did you watch a crime drama on TV or go to an abolitionists web site? I know that I go out of my way to treat an SP well. I like to. I do not think that I am unique in any way. After meeting several people that partake in this hobby, I think that my feeling is fairly universal.

 

[talkinghead]

I admit that it bugs me when people engage in specious argument, or even when they simply don't bother to listen. The line in question is this: "I don't think all John's fully recognize the importance of treating other people well." This statement seems obviously true. NW is not saying that all hobbyists are disrespectful; he's merely saying that not all clients are respectful. That is an accurate statement, and his post should be uncontroversial. (And it is certainly not true that clients are "universally" respectful, as we know from this board ... and from all of human history.)

 

[hungry101]

Ahhhh, and now Alan Alda chimes in again. So what? Some crass thug is going to read the psychobabble of Phil Donahue's...um...I mean Noah Webster's original post and, as a result, they are going to change the way they treat the ladies of MERB? Does this make him feel superior or something? Of course! Of course we should all treat each other better. And now I am going to do something for the both of you. Go back to that Junior College or University that you have been hiding from work at for the past decade or so and take a welding class. Then go out and contribute to the overall economy and pay taxes for God's sake and then I can have some respect for you both.

 

[Flyingby]

Patron - a woman I was fairly close to left me a voicemail to understand if I would be willing to employee her daughter (the college cheerleader) during her break from college just to show here the ropes. I have seen pictures of this girl and I know about all her boyfriends and her love life etc. I never answered the mother's phone calls and I avoided this like the plague. I did not want to bring a potential #MeToo situation into my building. I have been scared straight.

Honestly, being a hot, fuckable young lady is a negative for me during an interview these days. I had two young girls working for me years ago and they were both top notch but it was problematic. I remember that middle management was always interested in their opinion and how they were doing. I noticed that they wanted to be their friends and a hero to these girls. One day, one of the girls made the offhand comment that she was so tired that day because I had asked her to come in early. I was called into someones office over this. The girl apologized profusely to me later and said she was not complaining but just talking. She and I both knew that the creep just wanted to fuck her. She had said "maybe if he was the last person on earth" so there was a chance. After this experience, I was very careful about having too many good looking and fuckable direct reports.

I love this post. I feel the exact same way! Even when i hire guys. I am carefull as they could potentially bring a #metoo situation at work. I used to flirt a lot at work and now i just stopped. Not worth the headaches or hassle. It is so much easier with an SP than coworker. The offslim chance of being in a raid aren’t as risky as a coworker who for whatever reason sees gains out of denouncing your office romance. Thanks for bringing this up hungry. I also look for both less attractive men and women when i hire

 

[Noah Weber]

It's good to get back to the issue of respect, as that is partially what the original post was about: true respect for other people's space. What the threads of this post has clearly shown is how difficult it actually is to show respect for others, especially if they seem in some way to be different from you.
Almost all people tend to think that they treat other people well, even if this may not represent actual reality. It does take some self-reflection and work to be able to actually treat other people with empathy.
Out of respect for this board, I did not dumb down my original post. Obviously, this has not gone down well. However, I will still act on the presumption that most people are smart enough to want to understand issues with some degree of nuance.
Comments that make assumptions about other people's contributions to society without any actual knowledge don't come across as thoughtful.

 

[Noah Weber]

You are distorting what I said. I saw and see no need to dumb things down, as I do have respect for this board. I did not say, nor imply on any level, that I did or do not think people on this board are not smart or that I am above them.