I had my worst day in my 16+ years in this business. Had to happen one day.

[Halloween Mike]

So i am gonna adress a few point first.

1) This is not a review. Im not gonna adress who it was. Don't dm me about it.

2) Its not an airport, no need to announce your departure. True. But i been here 16 years, i need to vent a bit, dare i said i earned it? This has nothing to do with merb, merb community or merb mods. I mostly always felt welcome here and some members became buddy. I don't even think ill be able to not "check merb". But i will stop posting a while, i will take a break i think as well on the hobby. This day really hit hard. (A certain blonde friend wich name start by a C will be a rare exeption that i will continue seeing cause i know she's awesome).

So here we go...

I booked a certain provider because i seen her before and was so happy she was back. Sadly she called sick so meeting was canceled. This happen. Im not holding anything against anyone on that. Normal hobby badlucks.

Right at the same time my transport was running very late. Turned out he never show up. Had to take bus and funny not funny i would had been late for my initial meeting either way.

A few inquiries sadly didn't worked (already booked or unavailable, again totally normal, this was same night so no issues there, just trying in case)

Then it became a round of tries and badlucks. Booked one at a certain agency, she cancelled a bit before my meeting time. Booker was kind and did tried to find replacement but replacement didn't wanted to come to my hotel (i didn't intended to book outcall originally...so it was just to sleep). So ultimately it was running pretty late.

Tried another agency and asked who was available. Got a meeting. Not someone on my radar but hey those did turned out great at times in the past. It was delayed but booker kept me updated and ultimatly she showed up.

Would my night of misfortune be saved like it happened a few times before? Oh boy no it didn't.

I had my first totally awfull meeting. Like i had bad ones in the past a few times but my bads were nowhere near some other guys bad. They were more in the "meh" category.

In a nutshell it was clear she was not comfortable much with me despite me trying to be as nice as i could. She confirm hotel played a part (again originally didn't expected to host, no it was not the marriot or the chabrol or a typical SP motel). So i guess i started with a strike on that. But right away kissing was just peck on the lips like your mom would kiss you when you were 3... I felt something was off.

Anyway not gonna go in full details but lets say i got soft fast when she mentioned she didn't like my dick. I did offer CBJ (wich if you know me you know i never been a fan of) but she had only 2 condoms? So we were limited. Now i did try to get myself hard by stroking myself but since i didn't touch myself the last few days i made myself cum soft.

Now for disclaimer i was expecting a full blown PSE vibe in my OG meeting and i usually have more control over myself. I seen tons of providers and i manage to come at the end (1 sog guy mostly). Usually if the BJ get too pleasurable i tell them to stop and we go in FS. I never came in FS. In this instance i felt the pressure to get hard despite things going south and my "arousal" not being there due to what happened.

Now there is a ton of points i know some peoples will have opinions on. Some will say "but you came". Yes. But i think it was simply cause rubbing at this point. I was trying to get hard. Either i stopped and stayed soft or i came. Its lose/lose.

When i came i told her this was it there was nothing to be done anymore. So i told her she could go. I knew this moment would come one day. I read it before. I was like fine ill take it as a loss and move on. But she kinda insisted on "i hope your not angry" wich i said "no im just disapointed". Now writing it i notice how it sound like the "meme" but it was not my intent. She kinda started trying to justify herself instead of just leaving...

Then things got even worst. I won't say it all because i agreed with the agency to not name the SP but basically all i read over my years was taking form from other guys worst meetings and i was like "oh boy".

And yes i feel bad she felt bad. I feel bad she cried. But im not a lyer. I was not able to tell her "nah its fine" with a straight face. And yes losing money, especially after that day of misfortune, it hit me too.

I could still hear her sobbing in the corridor waiting for her lift and yes it makes me feel bad. Its not in my nature to be mean. And no i didn't pushed her to do anything she didn't wanted to do but i do think she should had refuse me right away as i undressed. At that point my day was already terrible anyway. I would had probably laugh it off and say to myself "next time listen to the signs".

And before anyone badly interpret it. No i was not in a bad mood despite all of this. The SP was attractive and i was full on ready to be like "yes the road there was hard, but now im here, lets have a good time". Like i said i had a few "late replacements" turn out great.

And now UNRELATED to this situation...

Someone text me sending me a MMS wich are auto blocked on my phone. Then they asked if it was me (by Merb name). This was before the incident i spoke about. I said yes and asked who it was and never got a reply... Thats weird.

And at some point earlier (again way before the incident) i tried contacting Euphoria and no answer. Its like my messages are not delivered. Its the right number i see the conversation. Im hoping its technical issues but if im block i dunno why. Yes last time there was a little "incident" with the desk agent but its the booker who told me to enter and wait in the lobby. Desk security agent got pushy but booker talked to him and all was good. Like i would had stayed outside if booker didn't said i could enter. I would know for next time. Like to me it was just a little awkward but brushed off fast and my meeting itself was good? I can't think this security desk guy little incident would be a reason...

Anyway im definately banned for sure with the other agency with the meeting i had. If i am with Euphoria too yikes (please @Euphoria Girls DM me to at least let me know why if its the case).

So like at this point this is why im like yeah time to take a break. Man oh man if i could go back to yesterday and not make that initial booking...

And just to finish on this to make it perfectly clear. The SP could had left anytime. I never hold her if anything i encouraged her to leave. With the money etc. She tried to "fix thing" but it just made it worst.

I don't think she's a bad person. A bad/mean person wouldn't had cried. She felt bad but it also made me feel bad (made me feel guilty). I just think she is not suited for this job.

To my defense yes i avoided lots of risky situations and mostly played safe in my years im this business. But i seen hundred+ provider, from agencies to High end indies ranging from 400 to 700h. First time this happen.

Yes it hurt me to be "that guy" that may end up being the reason she leaves or take a break or simply be "what was the worst that happened in this job". Yes i feel guilty in a way.

But they say life is about learning so i must learn from this. But for now i think ill just stay away altogether.

 

[David Sel et Poivre]

I'm sorry to hear about your experience and the negative impact that it had on you..
Sometimes we fix our thoughts on only what it is we want and totally ignore the signs.
In this case the Universe was sending loud, clear signs, to postpone that certain need that night, and stay home, as you experienced with all the cancelations, plus your ride not showing up etc...
It has been my experience that when I ignore the signs and press on, that it is a recipe for disaster.
It is a lessons learned experience.
Wishing you a prompt recovery from this experience.

 

[DenisZim]

Sometimes God is sending us a message.
If we are not able to read the message this can become an extremely dangerous hobby.

 

[Halloween Mike]

Sometimes God is sending us a message.
If we are not able to read the message this can become an extremely dangerous hobby.

Im an atheist but if i was to be religious i would say this would be closer to the work of the devil...or some trickster Angel name Gabriel (fellow Supernatural fans will understand).

Well i do feel a bit better this morning. I guess looking at my big pile of cash left do help... :/ (I wanted to do 2 meetings and had put aside enough for multiple extras so there is many left).

That said i got no return from Euphoria (wich is probably what puzzle me the most). But its early. They surely busy. Maybe tonight.

Anyway gonna leave my hotel soon and spend the day in Montreal/on the road after. Just can't wait to be back home.

Thanks for the kind words guy.

 

[2fast2slow]

i dont really understand what happened. It has happened to me very very often, that i am just not into the girl (plus im very desensitized) and i lose my erection and i just know the appoitment is not going to work so i cut it short. I explain "its not you, its me". They have never cared as long as you still pay. Why did this girl leave crying?

 

[nothinghere]

Oh Yes I can relate to that story. It can even happen in a normal relationship where there is some underlying hidden irreconcilable issue that suddenly surfaces, and yea usually after a few "Signs". I have had a few of these very "Negative Energy" experiences and it take a few days or weeks to recover from. Yea... then you "Push On" like an addict calling girls to re-create some positive encounter to cancel out the negative encounter and the cycle continues always searching that positive energy rush. Definitely I have been traumatized enough to clearly read these "Signs" and when I feel they happen I "Stay Home" and have an emergency Xanax on standby to not be tempted to "Push On". That anxiety energy to "Push On" is very strong. I remember when I was younger days where I absolutely had to have some kind of sexual experience to feel normal and it led me to some dark places. These days I carefully moderate and calculate what my game plan is and when to "Abort Mission", and sometimes need that emergency Xanax to chill out and stay at home and not spend money. That story above really set off a bunch of flashbacks years back and posting it is highly appreciated for self reflection.

 

[LeDodo]

i dont really understand what happened. It has happened to me very very often, that i am just not into the girl (plus im very desensitized) and i lose my erection and i just know the appoitment is not going to work so i cut it short. I explain "its not you, its me". They have never cared as long as you still pay. Why did this girl leave crying?

Maybe because of the disappointment he told her. Educated guess is agency girls (and not only) want good reviews/feedbacks otherwise they'll get words from the agency. A lady told about such situations and affected her obviously.
I guess she tried all she could to do good but as HM mentioned it looks like it only get worst or weird.

 

[LeDodo]

So i am gonna adress a few point first.

1) This is not a review. Im not gonna adress who it was. Don't dm me about it.

2) Its not an airport, no need to announce your departure. True. But i been here 16 years, i need to vent a bit, dare i said i earned it? This has nothing to do with merb, merb community or merb mods. I mostly always felt welcome here and some members became buddy. I don't even think ill be able to not "check merb". But i will stop posting a while, i will take a break i think as well on the hobby. This day really hit hard. (A certain blonde friend wich name start by a C will be a rare exeption that i will continue seeing cause i know she's awesome).

So here we go...

I booked a certain provider because i seen her before and was so happy she was back. Sadly she called sick so meeting was canceled. This happen. Im not holding anything against anyone on that. Normal hobby badlucks.

Right at the same time my transport was running very late. Turned out he never show up. Had to take bus and funny not funny i would had been late for my initial meeting either way.

A few inquiries sadly didn't worked (already booked or unavailable, again totally normal, this was same night so no issues there, just trying in case)

Then it became a round of tries and badlucks. Booked one at a certain agency, she cancelled a bit before my meeting time. Booker was kind and did tried to find replacement but replacement didn't wanted to come to my hotel (i didn't intended to book outcall originally...so it was just to sleep). So ultimately it was running pretty late.

Tried another agency and asked who was available. Got a meeting. Not someone on my radar but hey those did turned out great at times in the past. It was delayed but booker kept me updated and ultimatly she showed up.

Would my night of misfortune be saved like it happened a few times before? Oh boy no it didn't.

I had my first totally awfull meeting. Like i had bad ones in the past a few times but my bads were nowhere near some other guys bad. They were more in the "meh" category.

In a nutshell it was clear she was not comfortable much with me despite me trying to be as nice as i could. She confirm hotel played a part (again originally didn't expected to host, no it was not the marriot or the chabrol or a typical SP motel). So i guess i started with a strike on that. But right away kissing was just peck on the lips like your mom would kiss you when you were 3... I felt something was off.

Anyway not gonna go in full details but lets say i got soft fast when she mentioned she didn't like my dick. I did offer CBJ (wich if you know me you know i never been a fan of) but she had only 2 condoms? So we were limited. Now i did try to get myself hard by stroking myself but since i didn't touch myself the last few days i made myself cum soft.

Now for disclaimer i was expecting a full blown PSE vibe in my OG meeting and i usually have more control over myself. I seen tons of providers and i manage to come at the end (1 sog guy mostly). Usually if the BJ get too pleasurable i tell them to stop and we go in FS. I never came in FS. In this instance i felt the pressure to get hard despite things going south and my "arousal" not being there due to what happened.

Now there is a ton of points i know some peoples will have opinions on. Some will say "but you came". Yes. But i think it was simply cause rubbing at this point. I was trying to get hard. Either i stopped and stayed soft or i came. Its lose/lose.

When i came i told her this was it there was nothing to be done anymore. So i told her she could go. I knew this moment would come one day. I read it before. I was like fine ill take it as a loss and move on. But she kinda insisted on "i hope your not angry" wich i said "no im just disapointed". Now writing it i notice how it sound like the "meme" but it was not my intent. She kinda started trying to justify herself instead of just leaving...

Then things got even worst. I won't say it all because i agreed with the agency to not name the SP but basically all i read over my years was taking form from other guys worst meetings and i was like "oh boy".

And yes i feel bad she felt bad. I feel bad she cried. But im not a lyer. I was not able to tell her "nah its fine" with a straight face. And yes losing money, especially after that day of misfortune, it hit me too.

I could still hear her sobbing in the corridor waiting for her lift and yes it makes me feel bad. Its not in my nature to be mean. And no i didn't pushed her to do anything she didn't wanted to do but i do think she should had refuse me right away as i undressed. At that point my day was already terrible anyway. I would had probably laugh it off and say to myself "next time listen to the signs".

And before anyone badly interpret it. No i was not in a bad mood despite all of this. The SP was attractive and i was full on ready to be like "yes the road there was hard, but now im here, lets have a good time". Like i said i had a few "late replacements" turn out great.

And now UNRELATED to this situation...

Someone text me sending me a MMS wich are auto blocked on my phone. Then they asked if it was me (by Merb name). This was before the incident i spoke about. I said yes and asked who it was and never got a reply... Thats weird.

And at some point earlier (again way before the incident) i tried contacting Euphoria and no answer. Its like my messages are not delivered. Its the right number i see the conversation. Im hoping its technical issues but if im block i dunno why. Yes last time there was a little "incident" with the desk agent but its the booker who told me to enter and wait in the lobby. Desk security agent got pushy but booker talked to him and all was good. Like i would had stayed outside if booker didn't said i could enter. I would know for next time. Like to me it was just a little awkward but brushed off fast and my meeting itself was good? I can't think this security desk guy little incident would be a reason...

Anyway im definately banned for sure with the other agency with the meeting i had. If i am with Euphoria too yikes (please @Euphoria Girls DM me to at least let me know why if its the case).

So like at this point this is why im like yeah time to take a break. Man oh man if i could go back to yesterday and not make that initial booking...

And just to finish on this to make it perfectly clear. The SP could had left anytime. I never hold her if anything i encouraged her to leave. With the money etc. She tried to "fix thing" but it just made it worst.

I don't think she's a bad person. A bad/mean person wouldn't had cried. She felt bad but it also made me feel bad (made me feel guilty). I just think she is not suited for this job.

To my defense yes i avoided lots of risky situations and mostly played safe in my years im this business. But i seen hundred+ provider, from agencies to High end indies ranging from 400 to 700h. First time this happen.

Yes it hurt me to be "that guy" that may end up being the reason she leaves or take a break or simply be "what was the worst that happened in this job". Yes i feel guilty in a way.

But they say life is about learning so i must learn from this. But for now i think ill just stay away altogether.

Sorry to hear about your story but yes sometimes signs are a thing lol

I did have those signs moments. Also thought about having a turn around backup plan and all. But at the end I calm down and just told myself it will be money for next time lol

Good to hear you feel better today

 

[nothinghere]

...or some trickster

Yea... war with inter-dimensional "Tricksters" F makes me paranoid to even spell or speak "Tricksters" but it has been done.

 

[Carmine Falcone]

Im an atheist but if i was to be religious i would say this would be closer to the work of the devil...or some trickster Angel name Gabriel (fellow Supernatural fans will understand).

Well i do feel a bit better this morning. I guess looking at my big pile of cash left do help... :/ (I wanted to do 2 meetings and had put aside enough for multiple extras so there is many left).

That said i got no return from Euphoria (wich is probably what puzzle me the most). But its early. They surely busy. Maybe tonight.

Anyway gonna leave my hotel soon and spend the day in Montreal/on the road after. Just can't wait to be back home.

Thanks for the kind words guy.

I don't personally understand the perspective that god was sending a message. As you noted and has happened to some of us, sometimes the subsequent booking after a cancelation has led to a fun time with a second or even third choice. I've also had a bad time after a cancelation, cuz that's how statistics work. Some will go well, some won't. Another thing I don't personally understand is she expected you to be jazzed up AFTER she told you she didn't like your dick? Sorry about your experience.

 

[DenisZim]

I don't personally understand the perspective that god was sending a message. As you noted and has happened to some of us, sometimes the subsequent booking after a cancelation has led to a fun time with a second or even third choice. I've also had a bad time after a cancelation, cuz that's how statistics work. Some will go well, some won't. Another thing I don't personally understand is she expected you to be jazzed up AFTER she told you she didn't like your dick? Sorry about your experience.

People call this emotional intelligence. It is an important factor that often surpasses traditional IQ. You have it and you understand it, or you have never noticed it in your life. If you do not understand it, this hobby can be extremely dangerous for you. One unsuitable woman who makes you feel special can shatter your whole world. Because sometimes such relationships are not just about bum-bum-chao.

 

[skarsga]

Sorry for your experience Mike.

Shit happens without any good explanation. I think there is usually something positive to take away our learn even from the worst of situations. I hope you are able to recuperate and find something meaningful out of all
Happy hunting in the future!

 

[Cap'tain Fantastic]

I never ever had a plan B, the reason being that, when trying to book a girl, it is that girl and only that girl I feel like playing with, often for very specific reasons. So when plan doesnt work, I just rebook and move on with my "normal " life, waiting for the appointment to happen.

 

[Halloween Mike]

i dont really understand what happened. It has happened to me very very often, that i am just not into the girl (plus im very desensitized) and i lose my erection and i just know the appoitment is not going to work so i cut it short. I explain "its not you, its me". They have never cared as long as you still pay. Why did this girl leave crying?

Hum if you are fine losing money its ok ... But in my case these type of things don't happen. I mean i only book so often, i am eager to go to Montreal, and im into "any girls" if they have a good warm attitude. This is basically a case of doing the minimum and expecting easy almost free money. Did you read the part i said she only kissed on the lips like a mom would kiss a toddler? Did you saw she only brough 2 condoms? (what a smart way to cut services...), did you read she didn't liked my dick and was just not willing to give a proper BBBJ? Like the service was bad man... hyper bad. Im not the kinda guy to be like "nah im just not into her". I had times when i openned the door and was slightly disapointed by the look of an SP (vs pics), but heck these often turned out to be great meetings cause they were amazing providers. I seen over 100 women, i booked for 16 years, i never had a "nah im not feeling it tonight, lets cut it short". Not all my meetings were perfect but usually there was always something to salvage it. I remember a provider that was kinda cold and i can't say it was a great meeting per say, but she gave me a good BJ with CIM (after some sex) and that was fine. Im not expecting every encounters to be my "greatest ever" either.

 

[Halloween Mike]

Yea... then you "Push On" like an addict calling girls to re-create some positive encounter to cancel out the negative encounter and the cycle continues always searching that positive energy rush.

Had time to think on that and i must not let one bad encounter ruin the fun. As you say i will likely end up going back sooner than i expected.

 

[Halloween Mike]

I guess she tried all she could to do good but as HM mentioned it looks like it only get worst or weird.

Like i said i don't think she did it in a mean way but no she didn't do all she could. She told me at some point "its my body and i can chose to not do something" and i said yes thats totally true, but she was advertised as GFE+, its was not some shady encounter off leolist... I will never force anyone to do something against their will but then if they deceive me and advertise it and just not provide it, then yes i would normally report on it. Im transparent here, i did cut a deal with the owner. I said i wouldn't review because of said deal. Thats why im not mentioning who it is. Ill keep my word on that. But this is the same exact type of situation of all these guys who call Leolist shady ads and are told certain services, they pay, and then there is a gazillion restrictions and all they said was fine are not anymore. Thats bait and switch... Oh and i didn't mentioned it in the OG message but she asked the money right away (it was in an envelope ready on the night table) and banked it right away. But apparently this is not a red flag anymore because i read many ads of SPs who want to be paid in advance because of bad clients who screw them (and i can't blame them because i know its true it happen). As i said it was not a shady unknown from LL so i was like "sure envelope is there".

 

[Halloween Mike]

I don't personally understand the perspective that god was sending a message. As you noted and has happened to some of us, sometimes the subsequent booking after a cancelation has led to a fun time with a second or even third choice. I've also had a bad time after a cancelation, cuz that's how statistics work. Some will go well, some won't. Another thing I don't personally understand is she expected you to be jazzed up AFTER she told you she didn't like your dick? Sorry about your experience.

In this case it was badluck after badluck. OG booking cancelled, transport choked without warning, then try to book like 4-5 times and things kept getting sour (once litterally like 30m before she was set to arrive). Oh at least i got a message here from James at Euphoria confirming me this was simply technical issues. Thats at least a relief. But it add to the whole "universe was trying to send me a message". But yeah plan B or even C can turn out fantastic i know.

 

[Halloween Mike]

I never ever had a plan B, the reason being that, when trying to book a girl, it is that girl and only that girl I feel like playing with, often for very specific reasons. So when plan doesnt work, I just rebook and move on with my "normal " life, waiting for the appointment to happen.

The issue is its more complicated for me than for you im sure. I have to set bus, amigoexpress transports, book hotel (unless a friend can host me but it has been a bit more complicated lately and i can only know last minute, wich make it not possible to book some of the girls i want). I mean with Forever you got a 3 day schedule but that book usually in advance, so can't go last minute. With Euphoria its late night for next day, wich make it almost impossible anymore for me to see someone from Euphoria as an "exclusive". Like i mean i have to either see their SP as a "second meeting" on the next day before going home, or if im going to Montreal anyway for an event (still again im risking the girls i want to see may not be available and other agencies may be booked by then). They all their system and i respect them, but it make it very hard for a guy like me wich is out of town. And as i said i did have plan B turned out fine.

 

[EastWind]

Wow that really sucks. Either this is just a case of a bad luck one off or the underlying foundations of the Montreal hobby scene has changed.

Well HM if and when you make a return to Montreal and something like this repeats then you know this not bad luck and act accordingly.

 

[Jamesrenard44]

Hey man

I’ve known you for years. Read you for ages.

Clearly it’s bad luck.

But

I have one suggestion for you. You started to hobby before me but i wasn’t too far behind. For my personal experience, I don’t connect anymore with the new generation of sp. it is me. I realize that I prefer women in their 30’s now; otherwise the gap is too large, the dynamic is too mechanical.

It’s a suggestion but your a veteran, you know what to do