Random thoughts: What’s on your mind lately? Part 2

[Lunaseraphim]

Isn’t it great when we agree .

It's always better when conversations here are positive lol

 

[philonius]

Eating amazing falafel and I think finding a great sharwarma spot is easy nowadays but great falafel is hard to find. Pre-made falafel can suck a butt. Make it on demand or not at all!

 

[LeDodo]

I sleep not enough every night

 

[ChloeCoeur]

Eating amazing falafel and I think finding a great sharwarma spot is easy nowadays but great falafel is hard to find. Pre-made falafel can suck a butt. Make it on demand or not at all!

I agree, where is the falafel spot you found? I have only had Falafel Yoni in Montreal and would give it a 6.5

 

[Enjoying life]

I have clients who could easily have sex, but they don't want to go to bars and seduce someone or use dating apps so they prefer paying. But you do have a point, men are less likely to refuse sex, because there is less of a danger for them to accept. I don't like random hook ups but even if I did, I would be afraid of going home with a stranger I met at a bar.

I think that also women are educated to be ashamed of their own sexual needs, so they would feel shy about hiring escorts maybe. There's an idea that women prefer romance and men prefer sex, but you'd be surprised by how many men need to build some sort of connection before doing it. I think men are taught that sex is the most valuable form of intimacy they can have, but a lot of men actually like to cuddle and hold hands. I think far more men pay for sex for other reasons than just being horny. Obviously they will not refuse to have sex.. but the problem is more like they are touch starved and lonely.

A lot of straight women exchange non sexual intimacy with their friends..

It costs money either way ! With SPS you can have good conversations with no headaches and you will have intimacy where dating is too much of a headache and BS to get what you desire I find! You can spend on dates and nothing happens as there are women that do that on purpose!

 

[philonius]

I agree, where is the falafel spot you found? I have only had Falafel Yoni in Montreal and would give it a 6.5

I haven't found one in Montreal worth repeating yet. Mine is 6 hours west so it probably won't be of use to you but even in the GTA I have only found 2 worth their weight in chickpeas.

 

[LeDodo]

I agree, where is the falafel spot you found? I have only had Falafel Yoni in Montreal and would give it a 6.5

I recommend you TESFA!
So far one of the best I tried! Everything is so fresh
Their hummus is to fall for!

 

[jeffmathers]

No, that's not what I meant at all, you still misunderstood what I said..

I meant that women no matter what get sexually harassed everywhere they go and propositioned for sex when it's unwanted, and now, with the internet you don't even get away from it in the safety of your own home. Things are different now, a lot of girls I know started getting harassed by men online at 12 or 13 years old.. I did as well. What I said is that combined with the shame that women have been taught about their own sexuality, the value they place on how attractive men think they are (which means they should be getting romanced by someone if they are attractive enough.. which isn't the truth), and the fact that women are kind of afraid of being left alone with a male stranger, they are less likely to hire a male escort. There is much more emphasis on how conventionally attractive women are in society vs men.

I also specifically said earlier that a lot of men who pay for sex are attractive and do have game, they just don't want to go through the process of trying to pick up someone at a bar or go on dating apps, which is exhausting for a lot of people. A lot of men who hire escorts are married or in a relationship.. Or a lot of men are just on a business trip and don't want to be alone the whole time, even if they have friends and women they talk to at home.

I also agree with you lol it's not easy to meet people like it used to be because people don't talk to each other in person anymore, for various societal reasons.. But it's like you said, in female friend groups, people don't really egg each other on to pick up men like that. People are hoping for romantic situations usually and not just sex or short term relationships, generally.. Those are all very general statements obviously.

All of that is correct and sounds like something women I know say about dating. Also I think a lot of people don't realize a person being "attractive" doesn't really make dating easier. If someone attracts everyone most of those people won't be the right person and plenty of people aren't really capable of dating someone who is their "ideal" because of insecurities.

A person who attracts a ton of people has to potentially do a lot of work of rejecting a ton of people. Some of whom only see the attractive person in a sort of depersonalized way. I feel the diaries of Marilyn Monroe and Princess Daisy should be taught in school so people get a more nuanced view of dating and more exposure to non male protagonists.

You said that well.

 

[jeffmathers]

I'm on a road trip going through several states. It's always weird to me when people say Quebec is conservative. I feel Utah and a number of American states that are clamping down are way more conservative. Though also Montreal seems weirdly conservative. My first time going to Montreal pride was last year and I was surprised there wasn't as much nudity and other things as Seattle's pride parade. I feel Seattle pride is way bigger. I'm not trying to insult Montreal. It's just interesting how in some ways seem more conservative and in some ways less conservative than other places.

Also people I know were sharing videos of a nude bike event in Montreal in June or July. I wonder if that's new. I don't remember hearing about those before. Seattle and Portland have nude bike events going back decades.

 

[ChloeCoeur]

I recommend you TESFA!
So far one of the best I tried! Everything is so fresh
Their hummus is to fall for!

holy shit this place has 4.9 stars and 1100 reviews.... definitely trying it

 

[LeDodo]

holy shit this place has 4.9 stars and 1100 reviews.... definitely trying it

Yes a pure gem! I tried by accident and since I can't forget it hahaha

 

[Lunaseraphim]

All of that is correct and sounds like something women I know say about dating. Also I think a lot of people don't realize a person being "attractive" doesn't really make dating easier. If someone attracts everyone most of those people won't be the right person and plenty of people aren't really capable of dating someone who is their "ideal" because of insecurities.

A person who attracts a ton of people has to potentially do a lot of work of rejecting a ton of people. Some of whom only see the attractive person in a sort of depersonalized way. I feel the diaries of Marilyn Monroe and Princess Daisy should be taught in school so people get a more nuanced view of dating and more exposure to non male protagonists.

You said that well.

Both men and women have difficulty with dating right now. Hook up culture, ''situationships'', ''ethical non monogamy'' (we all have our opinions on this, I'm not against it but I've often seen it get really messy and I think most people aren't doing it for the right reasons) etc are really prevalent in the past 10 years, particularly since the pandemic which is weird because everyone was very lonely and isolated. A lot of the time when you use dating apps people are just looking for hook ups or they are not honest about what they want and need. A lot of people are simultaneously lonely & isolated, and also afraid of commitment and having a lot of difficulty really connecting with someone. Dating apps among other things are kinda like ''buffets'' that give you an illusion of choice.. It's true that it's easier for women to find someone to have sex with, but it's not easier for us to find someone to date. A lot of really attractive and interesting women I know can't find someone who is serious about dating or wants to be in a monogamous relationship.. The funniest part about this is that people who want to keep their options open are not less lonely than anyone else. At least a lot of men who book escorts are honest with themselves and mature enough to know they currently aren't ready to date in a serious way. I know there was a time when I was very lonely during a breakup, and seeing some of my clients was actually helpful and comforting, too.

 

[jeffmathers]

Both men and women have difficulty with dating right now. Hook up culture, ''situationships'', etc are really prevalent in the past 10 years, particularly since the pandemic which is weird because everyone was very lonely and isolated. A lot of the time when you use dating apps people are just looking for hook ups or they are not honest about what they want and need. A lot of people are simultaneously lonely & isolated, and also afraid of commitment and having a lot of difficulty really connecting with someone. Dating apps among other things are kinda like ''buffets'' that give you an illusion of choice.. It's true that it's easier for women to find someone to have sex with, but it's not easier for us to find someone to date. A lot of really attractive and interesting women I know can't find someone who is serious about dating or wants to be in a monogamous relationship.. The funniest part about this is that people who want to keep their options open are not less lonely than anyone else. At least a lot of men who book escorts are honest with themselves and mature enough to know they currently aren't ready to date in a serious way. I know there was a time when I was very lonely during a breakup, and seeing some of my clients was actually helpful and comforting, too.

I hope you know I agree with that. I know it's like a buffet where most of the options aren't great. I don't think my dating life would be easier if I looked like a top model like you and your coworkers.

 

[Giselle Montreal]

I bought new pure organic cotton duvet cover and sheet sets and I can't wait to go to bed tonight.

 

[Lunaseraphim]

I hope you know I agree with that. I know it's like a buffet where most of the options aren't great. I don't think my dating life would be easier if I looked like a top model like you and your coworkers.

I don't think I look like a top model lol but thank you for saying that.. ''most of the options aren't great'' is right. I also feel like if men have the intention of hooking up only, they can afford to be less selective because they're less likely to be assaulted than women are, unless they are gay..

I bought new pure organic cotton duvet cover and sheet sets and I can't wait to go to bed tonight.

I love having new sheets!

 

[jeffmathers]

I don't think I look like a top model lol but thank you for saying that.. ''most of the options aren't great'' is right. I also feel like if men have the intention of hooking up only, they can afford to be less selective because they're less likely to be assaulted than women are, unless they are gay..

I love having new sheets!

You don't look like a top model because you look better than top models. Yeah the risks are one reason I wouldn't want to date as a femme presenting person. I could imagine dating a woman that's giant and strong but the idea of dating a man that is giant and strong sounds scary even if most people like that are gentle. Obviously someone can be a petite male and still be bad too.

 

[philonius]

Looking back I'm batting close to 0.000 on doing la bise in MTL. I find that almost everytime I don't lean in to side-kiss I see the other person pump-fake bc they were going to, and everytime I do it turns into an actual kiss or a hug. This is excluding family, so mostly francophone friends and sps. I think I am a bise-whiffer .

 

[Lunaseraphim]

You don't look like a top model because you look better than top models. Yeah the risks are one reason I wouldn't want to date as a femme presenting person. I could imagine dating a woman that's giant and strong but the idea of dating a man that is giant and strong sounds scary even if most people like that are gentle. Obviously someone can be a petite male and still be bad too.

It's not necessarily about physical strenght although that is part of it. On the ''taboo fantasy'' thread there's a man who says he got a woman so drunk that he could have sex with her while she was passed out. I think he doesn't believe this is an assault. I think that yes some women can be violent, and a lot of women are psychologically abusive, but statistics unfortunately prove that men are more likely to commit sex crimes or domestic violence that includes physical assault etc.

 

[jeffmathers]

It's not necessarily about physical strenght although that is part of it. On the ''taboo fantasy'' thread there's a man who says he got a woman so drunk that he could have sex with her while she was passed out. I think he doesn't believe this is an assault. I think that yes some women can be violent, and a lot of women are psychologically abusive, but statistics unfortunately prove that men are more likely to commit sex crimes or domestic violence that includes physical assault etc.

Yeah I agree that there is more of a gender than a strength factor that's why I think a giant woman who's strong would be less worrying than a small male. Though I know from lesbian friends that terrible women exist. I wish I'd steered things towards a happier topic.

 

[Enjoying life]

Yeah I agree that there is more of a gender than a strength factor that's why I think a giant woman who's strong would be less worrying than a small male. Though I know from lesbian friends that terrible women exist. I wish I'd steered things towards a happier topic.

Sps are the best kept secret!