What’s the criteria for your ATF

[Sylar]

Hello Merbists,

Happy New Year first of all. I hope everyone had a good start in 2025.

As someone who usually prefers experiences with new SPs over repeats I was wondering how you all set the “criteria” for your ATF. In other words, how and when did that special lady become your ATF and what triggered this unique “promotion”?

Was it after a certain time period? (Duration)
Was it after certain amount of dates? (Frequency)
Was it a service only that particular SP offered?
Were you comfortable sharing private details outside the bedroom?
Did you meet outside of the paid hours as friends? (Activites without intimacy)
Common interests?
Or just feeling a connection?

I understand it will likely be a combination of all the above but I am curious how each of you found your ATF and what made that person so special.

Bonus question: Once you had your ATF, how often do you see her compared to other SPs.

Thanks!

 

[rando555]

Connection + Chemistry. That's it.

Lack of physical attraction precludes the latter.

Also I put a lot of effort into myself so having my partner be attracted to me is also a major factor and it cannot be faked, although there's definitely individuals that are good at acting

 

[LC18]

My ATFs are men that not necessarily book often but that make every date a special moment.

Men I can be my true self with and not be scared to be weird and make inappropriate jokes.

Men that make me comfortable enough to see them in their private residences.

Men that I could forget to ask them for money because it felt like a regular date.

Men that aren’t necessarily rich but that will still spoil me by booking longer dates or by taking me to a restaurant.

Unlike clients, I have no control on how many times I see them so I just hope that I am their ATF as well.

 

[envelopes]

I know there are differing definitions of ALL Time Favorite. For me, my definition of an ATF is "real" GFE.

I know on this board, GFE is a term used for certain services provided.

For me, I think GFE means you really feel like the SP is your GF where you can have a good chat and have great action. Had 2 ATFs according to that definition.

 

[NFLMEL]

Switch things up on each visit, show a different experience.

 

[David Sel et Poivre]

For me, the SP will become my ATF if (overtime) there is a genuine / authentic mutual interest (vibe) whereby we can explore / experience the 5 types of intimacy together easily and / or with some effort and attention.
Physical.
Intellectual.
Spiritual.
Experimental.
Emotional.

 

[T'storm]

How did she became my ATF? It was simple enough, I first saw her pictures and had this physical attraction about her, read her very well review and was immediately drawn to her even before seeing her in person first. Our first date was amazing, her reviews were accurate and I felt this sensation that was hard to miss, I'm sure she felt it too.
I needed to make a second date so I could go back and pick up my jaw that fell to the ground on our first meeting. After picking it up we sat and chatted about our childhood...she is 14 years younger then me and yet still so much in common, the way we were raised, music, activities, she likes older gentlemen and she also felt close to me. She became my one and only for 2 years and I wanted more but I thought, what if there are more gems like her out there?
My search started but it was never easy, I found others that were very hot, sexy, but without the personality that my ATF has. I never did stop seeing her but every second time I needed to be with someone I did my research and after 1 year I stuck with her because she gives me comfort and I feel like I'm at home with her, true GFE.