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Tea Dating App Hacked; 13,000 Women Have Images Stolen

Rebaynia

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EagerBeaver

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The data breaches that affect us are growing. My health insurer, Anthem BCBS, recently was hacked. They sent me the standard data breach letter saying "you better run a credit report and see if any new accounts were opened in your name, dude".

The very next day after I got the data breach letter, I got a real time notification on my Health Savings Account Card that my card had been used to make a purchase at a Target halfway across the country. I immediately called my HSA and they cancelled the card.

I ran a credit report and no new accounts were opened in my name.

Fortunately I think the only damage done by the Anthem data breach was the leaking of my since cancelled HSA card info. The only card I used for medical expenses.

All of us need to be vigilant with our data! Watch out!!!!!
 
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LeDodo

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The data breaches that affect us are growing. My health insurer, Anthem BCBS, recently was hacked. They sent me the standard data breach letter saying "you better run a credit report and see if any new accounts were opened in your name, dude".

The very next day after I got the data breach letter, I got a real time notification on my Health Savings Account Card that my card had been used to make a purchase at a Target halfway across the country. I immediately called my HSA and they cancelled the card.

I ran a credit report and no new accounts were opened in my name.

Fortunately I think the only damage done by the Anthem data breach was the leaking of my since cancelled HSA card info. The only card I used for medical expenses.

All of us need to be vigilant with our data! Watch out!!!!!
One of the funniest stolen data I heard to date from an colleague was that his credit card has been used to buy like hundreds of songs on Apple music lol
 

eviltmp

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Women: We need to dox and slander people without their consent.

Also Women: We can't believe anyone would dox and slander women! It's so unfair!

Karma is seldom this ruthless and quick.
 

wtvmark

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I dunno how people could trust that app anyway. Give a photo of a government issues ID? No thanks.
And to hear stories about a man who is a stranger from a stranger.
I was reading reviews on the matter and all. Dating apps ruined a lot of stuff over the last decade or so. One review said it prevented her from accepting DMs from some who was known to send dick pics. I remember a time where if you showed people your dick for no reason you risked getting the shit kicked out of you. I've been in fights when i was young when a creep wouldn't piss off from a female friend.
Another review said this app is showing proof of why its safer to choose the bear then a strange man, bring up that debate from a year ago.
I guess no one remembers most sexual assaults are perpetrated by people you already know, not strangers. But not sure if that stat holds up anymore since its from 2017.
Anyway, shit like this is why i have barely any internet media footprint. If a search my name i get an obituary which is perfect for me.
 
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Lunaseraphim

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I dunno how people could trust that app anyway. Give a photo of a government issues ID? No thanks.
And to hear stories about a man who is a stranger from a stranger.
I was reading reviews on the matter and all. Dating apps ruined a lot of stuff over the last decade or so. One review said it prevented her from accepting DMs from some who was known to send dick pics. I remember a time where if you showed people your dick for no reason you risked getting the shit kicked out of you. I've been in fights when i was young when a creep wouldn't piss off from a female friend.
Another review said this app is showing proof of why its safer to choose the bear then a strange man, bring up that debate from a year ago.
I guess no one remembers most sexual assaults are perpetrated by people you already know, not strangers. But not sure if that stat holds up anymore since its from 2017.
Anyway, shit like this is why i have barely any internet media footprint. If a search my name i get an obituary which is perfect for me.
It's true that most assaults are perpetrated by people you already know but that includes people you already talked to on a dating app.. Date rapes are pretty common. However, people here may be surprised by this but I would never use an app like this.. At first when I heard about this data breach I thought ''oh this app is interesting and possibly helpful at keeping women safe''..

But I have mixed feelings about it. I'm not sure that it's necessary. When you go on a date with someone you met on an app, it's a private thing. You probably already added them on social media and kinda have an idea of who they are, chances are they know someone you know. You can meet the person in public first, etc as well. Really often predators and abusers will go after someone who's already not in a good place and doesn't have good boundaries, or someone who is naive. In my experience it's really easy to see red flags right away, and even if you know them, if you're already into them, there are chances you will ignore the red flags. Unfortunately also if it's anonymous anyone could just write anything they want.

Also there are things I don't want to know right away if I'm dating a new person. I don't want to know that he or she cheated on their ex or ghosted someone or made a mistake years ago. People can change and sometimes situations are complicated, I like to give a new person in my life the benefit of the doubt. Maybe it's naive. Usually I like to have a couple conversations with someone before I go on a date with them and I usually choose to meet them in a public, I look at their instagram account maybe, I check what friends we have in common to see what type of vibe they may have.. The truth is that no one is perfect. I also agree that hearing a story about someone from a stranger is always kinda sus, unless it's a really big deal.

(obviously, dating isn't like seeing clients as a provider.. I have to screen for safety reasons because there's no way for me to know what kind of person a new client who just texted me is really like)
 

Lunaseraphim

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To me this can be summarized as "another example of a technology that is supposed to make our lives better then ends up making it worse". Thar pretty much sums up the modern world in my opinion.
Well I think dating apps are a good example of that lol... I blame dating apps for a lot of problems we are having with meeting people and relationships nowadays. I think these apps could be used in a lovely way, when I started using them when I was younger sure I had a lot of bad experiences but the most important part of it is that I made friends that I still talk to now and got to know a lot of cool people that way. A lot of problems that are reported on the ''tea app'' were actually sort of created by the apps themselves.
 

jeffmathers

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Well I think dating apps are a good example of that lol... I blame dating apps for a lot of problems we are having with meeting people and relationships nowadays. I think these apps could be used in a lovely way, when I started using them when I was younger sure I had a lot of bad experiences but the most important part of it is that I made friends that I still talk to now and got to know a lot of cool people that way. A lot of problems that are reported on the ''tea app'' were actually sort of created by the apps themselves.
I believe dating apps would work better if they were only allowed to be used for gay dating. On one hand my lesbian friends complain about how awful dating is for them but on the other hand I feel it would be harder for them if they had to struggle to find the small portion of women that want women. Though maybe my lesbian friends (and pan and straight friends) would be better off if there were just lesbian societies, social groups, etc for different people and in person was the main option for people.

My lesbian friends tell me they are tired of seeing the same people on apps in Vancouver, Portland, Seattle, Montreal, etc. Or when neither person makes the first move and things seem like they could have gone somewhere but both were two hesitant. I can also see how even with social clubs maybe people regardless of gender or sexuality could get bored of seeing the same people.

Another thing I believe most people aren't aware of is sure dating apps are really bad. But what makes them worse is almost all of them are owned by one company. This isn't all but just some of the dating apps they own. When one company owns all of the dating apps there is no incentive to help people find long term relationships. Instead the incentive is to waste people's time as much as possible and make sure things don't work for people. OKCupid and other sites used to have a search option and other features to help people find the right person. Switching all apps to endless swiping sends humanity into a dystopian hellscape of dating that dehumanizes people of all genders and sexualities.

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Lunaseraphim

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I believe dating apps would work better if they were only allowed to be used for gay dating. On one hand my lesbian friends complain about how awful dating is for them but on the other hand I feel it would be harder for them if they had to struggle to find the small portion of women that want women. Though maybe my lesbian friends (and pan and straight friends) would be better off if there were just lesbian societies, social groups, etc for different people and in person was the main option for people.

My lesbian friends tell me they are tired of seeing the same people on apps in Vancouver, Portland, Seattle, Montreal, etc. Or when neither person makes the first move and things seem like they could have gone somewhere but both were two hesitant. I can also see how even with social clubs maybe people regardless of gender or sexuality could get bored of seeing the same people.

Another thing I believe most people aren't aware of is sure dating apps are really bad. But what makes them worse is almost all of them are owned by one company. This isn't all but just some of the dating apps they own. When one company owns all of the dating apps there is no incentive to help people find long term relationships. Instead the incentive is to waste people's time as much as possible and make sure things don't work for people. OKCupid and other sites used to have a search option and other features to help people find the right person. Switching all apps to endless swiping sends humanity into a dystopian hellscape of dating that dehumanizes people of all genders and sexualities.
Yes they are all owned by the same company and they are designed to keep people failing. Think about it, if people actually were in relationships, they wouldn't keep using them. I know this sounds maybe far fetched but I think one of the reasons why ''ethical non monogamy'' and hook up culture are so popular today is because of dating apps. There are issues dating both men and women, they are different problems but sometimes the same. Those companies also make you pay to have more options because they realized that the apps have gotten really popular during the pandemic. I think that some environments and platforms attract a certain type of people.. There are lonely people using dating apps but there are also people with narcissistic tendencies who just want to validate themselves by winning over or having sex with as many people as possible without caring about them, and predators who are seeking for a vulnerable person to use or treat badly. I'm not saying people who want to hook up with many different individuals are necessarily narcissistic but I've often seen this.
 

jeffmathers

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Yes they are all owned by the same company and they are designed to keep people failing. Think about it, if people actually were in relationships, they wouldn't keep using them. I know this sounds maybe far fetched but I think one of the reasons why ''ethical non monogamy'' and hook up culture are so popular today is because of dating apps. There are issues dating both men and women, they are different problems but sometimes the same. Those companies also make you pay to have more options because they realized that the apps have gotten really popular during the pandemic. I think that some environments and platforms attract a certain type of people.. There are lonely people using dating apps but there are also people with narcissistic tendencies who just want to validate themselves by winning over or having sex with as many people as possible without caring about them, and predators who are seeking for a vulnerable person to use or treat badly. I'm not saying people who want to hook up with many different individuals are necessarily narcissistic but I've often seen this.
"maybe far fetched but I think one of the reasons why ''ethical non monogamy'' and hook up culture are so popular today is because of dating apps."

It's not far fetched. I feel a lot of poly people I know see themselves as rebels and I totally believe some people are only capable of being poly the same way some people can only do monogamy. However the rise of ethical non monogamy is definitely partly from the apps. I never considered ENM when I was younger. Now that I'm older and have heard plenty of people say "There are no good people to date" (usually referring to a specific gender they're tired of) I totally think about moving to a specific place where dating seems better. I got my first relationship in Montreal last year (wasn't great) but there are huge differences in dating in different cities.

Oh my bad I got off topic. "Those companies also make you pay to have more options because they realized that the apps have gotten really popular during the pandemic." yeah it's absurd. At times I have spent a bunch of money on dating apps. One thing I believe male presenting people should consider is that buying super likes is maybe a bad thing in more ways than one. It can look like desperation. That might be why super likes have never worked for me regardless of how much that person has in common with me.

On my road trip I walked through a mostly empty mall recently in Utah that had a lot of no loitering signs. That's one thing that's special about Montreal compared to most places I've been in North America. Tons of cheap third places. If you go to most American concerts a ticket is the same price at the end of the show as the beginning. In Montreal there are tons of people hanging out in parks (even more than in Vancouver), getting huge discounts when late to a concert, but yeah Montreal isn't perfect.

"There are lonely people using dating apps but there are also people with narcissistic tendencies who just want to validate themselves by winning over or having sex with as many people as possible without caring about them, and predators who are seeking for a vulnerable person to use or treat badly. I'm not saying people who want to hook up with many different individuals are necessarily narcissistic but I've often seen this."

100% correct. Though I'm on the masc presenting end so I imagine I get way more bots than you. But yeah dating apps are totally bad. My experience however fruitless isn't as hard as if I was car stopping hot like you and your coworkers but yeah. The only good connection I've had from dating apps is when I was like 22 I met a woman who I never had intimacy with and we became friends. She's gay and has been with her girlfriend for maybe 6 years now. I've had sex with people I met on dating apps but none of them were people I actually had much in common with. Usually the people in the civilian world with the most interest in me are the people who have the least in common with me.
 
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Rebaynia

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I can't say much against online dating.
Each time I actually went on looking for a relationship, I found one. Hell I tried using it last time for hookup culture 8 years ago, and found myself pursued into a relatiomship. Met 1 ex on ok cupid, another on plenty of fish, and last one i used was happn, which monitored other people on the app within your proximity that day. It was a way of seeing someone was mutually single when you went out, so you could potentially meet eachother while already out.
I was a parent at the age of 20. I didn't go out partying, online was how I met people.
 
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jeffmathers

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I can't say much against online dating.
Each time I actually went on looking for a relationship, I found one. Hell I tried using it last time for hookup culture 8 years ago, and found myself pursued into a relatiomship. Met 1 ex on ok cupid, another on plenty of fish, and last one i used was happn, which monitored other people on the app within your proximity that day. It was a way of seeing someone was mutually single when you went out, so you could potentially meet eachother while already out.
I was a parent at the age of 20. I didn't go out partying, online was how I met people.
All of those were before 2019 right? The apps changed a lot in the past 6 years.
 
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Lunaseraphim

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I feel a lot of poly people I know see themselves as rebels and I totally believe some people are only capable of being poly the same way some people can only do monogamy.
I'm not so sure I believe that. I think polyamory is a life style, not a sexual orientation. I think some people prefer polyamory for psychological reasons, same thing with monogamy.. And I hate to say this but often I've seen people not want to be in a monogamous relationship for selfish reason, and threatened to break up with their partner if the other one doesn't accept opening the relationship. I've been shamed by people for preferring monogamy and told that I'm selfish and like a ''kindergarten age child who only wants one friend'' LOL. I think these relational dynamics are complex and most people aren't mature enough and don't know themselves to the point where they are capable of navigating it in a respectful way. I'm not against it, I've seen people do it in a way that was cool.. i just don't think it's common, and I feel like a lot of people lie to themselves in these situations. You can also still cheat while non monogamous, so cheating people in monogamy aren't a good argument for it

I also think it's completely different when couples hire an escort, or when a woman tells her husband or partner that he can see providers because she isn't interested in sex. In a dating context, these situations may cause hurt feelings.
 
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jeffmathers

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I'm not so sure I believe that. I think polyamory is a life style, not a sexual orientation. I think some people prefer polyamory for psychological reasons, same thing with monogamy.. And I hate to say this but often I've seen people not want to be in a monogamous relationship for selfish reason, and threatened to break up with their partner if the other one doesn't accept opening the relationship. I've been shamed by people for preferring monogamy and told that I'm selfish and like a ''kindergarten age child who only wants one friend'' LOL. I think these relational dynamics are complex and most people aren't mature enough and don't know themselves to the point where they are capable of navigating it in a respectful way. I'm not against it, I've seen people do it in a way that was cool.. i just don't think it's common, and I feel like a lot of people lie to themselves in these situations. You can also still cheat while non monogamous, so cheating people in monogamy aren't a good argument for it

I also think it's completely different when couples hire an escort, or when a woman tells her husband or partner that he can see providers because she isn't interested in sex. In a dating context, these situations may cause hurt feelings.
Don't you think some people can't do poly or monogamy because one is ingrained as "wrong" to them? It's not the same as sexual orientation but I feel most people navigate one better than the other. Besides there are so many types of poly relationships. You've probably heard of these https://www.discoveringpolyamory.com/polyamorous-relationship-models

"And I hate to say this but often I've seen people not want to be in a monogamous relationship for selfish reason, and threatened to break up with their partner if the other one doesn't accept opening the relationship. "
It's unethical to force someone into a relationship dynamic they don't want. If someone wants to be poly they shouldn't drag a person who wants to be monogamous into it. It's selfish if it's disregarding the needs of others. Someone who wants to be poly should find people to be poly with and not try to hurt others. I want monogamy but in my fatigue I'll settle for something else.

Relationships are complex and I believe that kindergarten comment was from a terrible person trying to take advantage of your good heart. Terrible people seek out good people to try to take advantage of them.

"I think these relational dynamics are complex and most people aren't mature enough and don't know themselves to the point where they are capable of navigating it in a respectful way. I'm not against it, I've seen people do it in a way that was cool.."

Totally true

"i just don't think it's common, and I feel like a lot of people lie to themselves in these situations."

Not sure what you mean. Like what's not common?

"You can also still cheat while non monogamous, so cheating people in monogamy aren't a good argument for it"
I think some people need to not have any commitments and do relationship anarchy. I think some people aren't able to handle relationship commitments.

"I also think it's completely different when couples hire an escort, or when a woman tells her husband or partner that he can see providers because she isn't interested in sex. In a dating context, these situations may cause hurt feelings."

Makes sense.
 

Rebaynia

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All of those were before 2019 right? The apps changed a lot in the past 6 years.

Fair enough. I have only technically been single for all of 1 week since before covid. Didn't even get a chance to try online dating the last time. He represented my dreams and fantasies come true.
Within reason. Nothing is ever perfect. But what I miss from having a daily live together relationship, I get to pour into those I see. It's not faking it when I am getting/giving with those I see, what I am miss and need myself, (but also something I just cant get enough of even when i have it full time.) while Master and I still have limited time together. (We are both parents, with our kids being our primary focuses, and they, not really wanting to share their parents.)
 
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Lunaseraphim

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Don't you think some people can't do poly or monogamy because one is ingrained as "wrong" to them? It's not the same as sexual orientation but I feel most people navigate one better than the other. Besides there are so many types of poly relationships. You've probably heard of these https://www.discoveringpolyamory.com/polyamorous-relationship-models

"And I hate to say this but often I've seen people not want to be in a monogamous relationship for selfish reason, and threatened to break up with their partner if the other one doesn't accept opening the relationship. "
It's unethical to force someone into a relationship dynamic they don't want. If someone wants to be poly they shouldn't drag a person who wants to be monogamous into it. It's selfish if it's disregarding the needs of others. Someone who wants to be poly should find people to be poly with and not try to hurt others. I want monogamy but in my fatigue I'll settle for something else.

Relationships are complex and I believe that kindergarten comment was from a terrible person trying to take advantage of your good heart. Terrible people seek out good people to try to take advantage of them.

"I think these relational dynamics are complex and most people aren't mature enough and don't know themselves to the point where they are capable of navigating it in a respectful way. I'm not against it, I've seen people do it in a way that was cool.."

Totally true

"i just don't think it's common, and I feel like a lot of people lie to themselves in these situations."

Not sure what you mean. Like what's not common?

"You can also still cheat while non monogamous, so cheating people in monogamy aren't a good argument for it"
I think some people need to not have any commitments and do relationship anarchy. I think some people aren't able to handle relationship commitments.

"I also think it's completely different when couples hire an escort, or when a woman tells her husband or partner that he can see providers because she isn't interested in sex. In a dating context, these situations may cause hurt feelings."

Makes sense.
I think if someone can't have commitments they shouldn't call it polyamory or relationship anarchy, which has the word relationship in it. It involves commitments. If someone just wants one night stands or short term relationships they should just be honest about it or hire an escort. Not being able to commit isn't "being ethically non monogamous" or "into relationship anarchy" they are just irresponsible and getting in a bunch of relationships they can't put care into.
 
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