Ask us anything part 3

[Alucard87]

I lost 20 pounds during my depression in 2022, I didnt eat or work for 2 months. When I started eating again, I gained 10 pounds back and I started working again. 1 client (who I saw couple of time before my depression) booked me and after told my agency he's never gonna see me again because I was too skinny.

Eventually I was back to my normal weight; clients who saw me all before,during and after my depression were telling me : Wow did you gain weight recently? You're not as skinny.

FIY: I didnt actually 'gain weight' ; I only came back to my normal weight, which is 105 pounds at 5 feet.

That's wild that a client would drop you in that scenario. I haven't been mistreated or had a bad enough experience yet to turn me into the "treat them like a piece of meat" kind of client I keep hearing about. Couple pounds down, you compliment. Couple pounds up, shut your mouth it's just more to grab. Or a better sit on my face experience

 

[Lunaseraphim]

I think you're giving him too much credit here! First overnight or not, any decent human being knows that people need to eat. There's no world in which it's gentlemanly, or even ok and normal, to spend 8-16 hours with someone without so much as offering to eat at some point. This isn't escort etiquette it's just decency and common sense... Im sorry you experienced this

I haven't seen that client since last summer, and I don't think he had bad intentions.. I think he was trying to save money, which is normal considering the fact that he isn't wealthy. He did at some point order some junk food but it wasn't really appropriate for the occasion. I also figured he would choose a larger room, which wouldn't have been too expensive for the motel he picked. The thing is, an overnight is already expensive.. So it's not really logical to avoid spending a bit more.

It kinda made me not want to do overnights after that because I was so uncomfortable that time, and I felt super guilty for feeling this way because many people never get that type of bookings. That's why I think it's a bit silly when we are told we are ''bullying clients'' into these types of bookings because it was never my idea. It happens quite often actually that I get asked for overnights by clients I've never met and I always refuse.

Slightly off topic but, I do like long bookings like full day and full evenings. However overnights, entire weekends and FMTY are too much for me lol

That's wild that a client would drop you in that scenario. I haven't been mistreated or had a bad enough experience yet to turn me into the "treat them like a piece of meat" kind of client I keep hearing about. Couple pounds down, you compliment. Couple pounds up, shut your mouth it's just more to grab. Or a better sit on my face experience

This is just my opinion, but I don't think any bad experience in this industry justifies turning someone into this type of client... bad experiences with clients never turned me into someone who's taking it out on other men. My belief on this type of client is that they are like that to begin with, or they get jaded from too many experiences..

 

[Alucard87]

I haven't seen that client since last summer, and I don't think he had bad intentions.. I think he was trying to save money, which is normal considering the fact that he isn't wealthy. He did at some point order some junk food but it wasn't really appropriate for the occasion. I also figured he would choose a larger room, which wouldn't have been too expensive for the motel he picked. The thing is, an overnight is already expensive.. So it's not really logical to avoid spending a bit more.

It kinda made me not want to do overnights after that because I was so uncomfortable that time, and I felt super guilty for feeling this way because many people never get that type of bookings. That's why I think it's a bit silly when we are told we are ''bullying clients'' into these types of bookings because it was never my idea. It happens quite often actually that I get asked for overnights by clients I've never met and I always refuse.

Slightly off topic but, I do like long bookings like full day and full evenings. However overnights, entire weekends and FMTY are too much for me lol

This is just my opinion, but I don't think any bad experience in this industry justifies turning someone into this type of client... bad experiences with clients never turned me into someone who's taking it out on other men. My belief on this type of client is that they are like that to begin with, or they get jaded from too many experiences..

Yes I agree, it's probably moreso guys who are a bit sociopathic or poorly adjusted to general society who would be so rude. Same goes for SPs though, there's one chick who's ad goes off on guys with ED lmao . One of her requirements is you have to pop a Viagra. Imagine losing your erection which is devastating psychologically enough and then the girl starts screaming at you and throwing you out half dressed ffs haha

 

[Lunaseraphim]

Yes I agree, it's probably moreso guys who are a bit sociopathic or poorly adjusted to general society who would be so rude. Same goes for SPs though, there's one chick who's ad goes off on guys with ED lmao . One of her requirements is you have to pop a Viagra. Imagine losing your erection which is devastating psychologically enough and then the girl starts screaming at you and throwing you out half dressed ffs haha

I'm not going to say all SP's are amazing people.. There are providers I'd never be friends with because they are bullies and we do not share the same values. But I think it's always important to remember that this business is still underground and dangerous more for SP's than for clients. I do think clients in general are misunderstood by society and there are a lot of misconceptions and generalizations about them.. I don't believe in bashing clients of sex workers, it doesn't serve anyone.. Most clients are human beings like everyone else with their qualities and flaws, and capable of empathy and kindness. If clients treat us with respect we should definitely return the favor, obviously. However I think on the internet, no matter what platform you are on, people with sociopathic and narcissistic traits will take up more space.. they think that everyone is like them when it's not the case. They also deform everything we say.

 

[jeffmathers]

For sure. It's also more conservative about women's sexuality in particular. It would make sense that a young woman would feel shy about carrying condoms visibly.

She was in her early 40s (40s are still young to me even if she was around 15 years older than me)

I agree about the conservatism.

 

[jeffmathers]

I lost 20 pounds during my depression in 2022, I didnt eat or work for 2 months. When I started eating again, I gained 10 pounds back and I started working again. 1 client (who I saw couple of time before my depression) booked me and after told my agency he's never gonna see me again because I was too skinny.

Eventually I was back to my normal weight; clients who saw me all before,during and after my depression were telling me : Wow did you gain weight recently? You're not as skinny.

FIY: I didnt actually 'gain weight' ; I only came back to my normal weight, which is 105 pounds at 5 feet.

It really isn't fair the way people talk about the appearance of providers. I could never imagine saying the things people say in review threads. For example some reviews of providers in their 50s and 60s complain about appearance. I wish there was a rule about complaining about provider appearance. I feel that's one of the main reasons some providers decide to not have a review thread and one of the reasons so many providers quit suddenly.

I wish you didn't have to go through that.

 

[jeffmathers]

I had similar comments on my weight, when I started working in 2022 I was really not doing well and really really underweight. I got insulted over the phone, accused of being a heroin addict, told stuff like ''I'd never fuck you even if you paid me for it, you're too skinny!'', it was written in a review as well. I went back to my normal weight eventually, which is already quite low. And this guy had the nerve to tell me I was too big lol I was still under a healthy weight.

Commenting on people's weight is unacceptable.. I also feel bad writing this because a lot of providers do not fit in the ''spinner'' category and get insulted for being bigger all the time in reviews or over text. You don't know why someone is gaining or losing weight. Could be depression, an eating disorder, the effect of medication, another health issue, stress in personal life etc.

"I also feel bad writing this because a lot of providers do not fit in the ''spinner'' category" You didn't say anything wrong. Everyone in your industry (to my knowledge) gets criticized like that and it's not fair. People should treat you guys better.

 

[jeffmathers]

Yes I agree, it's probably moreso guys who are a bit sociopathic or poorly adjusted to general society who would be so rude. Same goes for SPs though, there's one chick who's ad goes off on guys with ED lmao . One of her requirements is you have to pop a Viagra. Imagine losing your erection which is devastating psychologically enough and then the girl starts screaming at you and throwing you out half dressed ffs haha

I want to see that ad

 

[Alucard87]

I want to see that ad

There's a thread or two about her. I believe she advertises here but I couldn't find it. She's known to be ..... mercurial.

 

[Julia Sky]

Couple pounds down, you compliment. Couple pounds up, shut your mouth it's just more to grab. Or a better sit on my face experience

I personally think compliments about weight loss aren't great either. Hear me out :

Some people lose weight due to illness, depression, etc. It sucks to get complimented on being sick. Some people actively want to gain weight but instead they lose it and the compliment could hurt their esteem, too, in this context. So many variations of why it's not great to compliment someone's weight.

I lost weight when I was younger because I ate one or two meals max per week for several months due to eating disorder - people congratulating me on the weight loss at the time were essentially saying "congrats on mistreating your body and having poor mental health".

Im back in the gym recently, and if I lose weight I hope people will congratulate me on being back in the gym (because Ive been saying I wanted to for a while) and doing something that makes me feel good, but not on the weight loss itself. I don't like compliments about weight in any context. They're weird and you never know how someone feels about their weight or how they got there in the first place!

 

[jeffmathers]

I personally think compliments about weight loss aren't great either. Hear me out :

Some people lose weight due to illness, depression, etc. It sucks to get complimented on being sick. Some people actively want to gain weight but instead they lose it and the compliment could hurt their esteem, too, in this context. So many variations of why it's not great to compliment someone's weight.

I lost weight when I was younger because I ate one or two meals max per week for several months due to eating disorder - people congratulating me on the weight loss at the time were essentially saying "congrats on mistreating your body and having poor mental health".

Im back in the gym recently, and if I lose weight I hope people will congratulate me on being back in the gym (because Ive been saying I wanted to for a while) and doing something that makes me feel good, but not on the weight loss itself. I don't like compliments about weight in any context. They're weird and you never know how someone feels about their weight or how they got there in the first place!

I wish this was taught in school. I didn't learn about this until my early 20s (Maybe late teens after high school)

 

[jeffmathers]

I was asked "Are you sure you want to apply this reaction?" When liking a post in Julia Sky's advertising thread. Of course that was my intention.

 

[philonius]

Here's a question for SPs that's probably lost in the last 130 pages here I don't want to read through: Do you have a preference regarding cut/uncut?

I imagine most will say IDC as long as it's clean but I mean like, all things being equal, a personal preference. Do you enjoy one more than the other?

 

[LC18]

Here's a question for SPs that's probably lost in the last 130 pages here I don't want to read through: Do you have a preference regarding cut/uncut?

I imagine most will say IDC as long as it's clean but I mean like, all things being equal, a personal preference. Do you enjoy one more than the other?

I do have a preference. Won’t say which it is.

 

[Julia Sky]

Here's a question for SPs that's probably lost in the last 130 pages here I don't want to read through: Do you have a preference regarding cut/uncut?

I imagine most will say IDC as long as it's clean but I mean like, all things being equal, a personal preference. Do you enjoy one more than the other?

Depends on the activity, and also on the person's hygiene and their specific anatomy. It's not as simple as "I prefer this"

 

[Lunaseraphim]

I personally think compliments about weight loss aren't great either. Hear me out :

Some people lose weight due to illness, depression, etc. It sucks to get complimented on being sick. Some people actively want to gain weight but instead they lose it and the compliment could hurt their esteem, too, in this context. So many variations of why it's not great to compliment someone's weight.

I lost weight when I was younger because I ate one or two meals max per week for several months due to eating disorder - people congratulating me on the weight loss at the time were essentially saying "congrats on mistreating your body and having poor mental health".

Im back in the gym recently, and if I lose weight I hope people will congratulate me on being back in the gym (because Ive been saying I wanted to for a while) and doing something that makes me feel good, but not on the weight loss itself. I don't like compliments about weight in any context. They're weird and you never know how someone feels about their weight or how they got there in the first place!

I agree with everything you're saying here.. I don't really want to talk about my relationship to my body and weight here but yea...

I get that people see providers based on what they look like in part, but... And this is where I stop.. I don't want to explain anything to anyone here but a little bit of reflection goes a long way.

(I'm specifically thinking of reviews and back handed compliments here)

 

[LeDodo]

I got often asked why as a man I have stretch marks ...

 

[Cap'tain Fantastic]

I got often asked why as a man I have stretch marks ...

Because you are a trans, you just dont know it!

 

[LeDodo]

Because you are a trans, you just dont know it!

Metrosexual all the way

 

[Enjoying life]

I agree with everything you're saying here.. I don't really want to talk about my relationship to my body and weight here but yea...

I get that people see providers based on what they look like in part, but... And this is where I stop.. I don't want to explain anything to anyone here but a little bit of reflection goes a long way.

(I'm specifically thinking of reviews and back handed compliments here)

Luna is a good example of a great person with fantastic qualities which is so refreshing to me!