Asking girls for BBFS

[ssj3]

For herpes-1 and 2 they actually check if we have developed antibodies which can only happen if we are exposed to it. I had confirmed with my doctor and he said the tests are 100% accurate for herpes too. Maybe he was wrong if you say so.

The other problem with herpes is usually doctors don't do it in the routine checkup. I had to ask the doctor for it to be included in the checkup

This will explain why tests for herpes are not included in standard STD screenings and why they are unreliable.
http://www.ashasexualhealth.org/stdsstis/herpes/herpes-testing/

 

[Julia Sky]

A friend of mine was diagnosed with herpes, and she got a call from the nurse 3 weeks later to tell her the results were false and she does not have herpes... Good thing her boyfriend didn't leave her at the time, would have sucked for her !

 

[Halloween Mike]

I should have used the phrase relatively safe BBBJ.

My overall point was that this industry self-regulates. If it does not do so, true regulations are pushed down from others.

Some women do CBJs, some BBBJ, some do BBBJTC. They are free to advertise what they offer, and customers can choose accordingly.

The industry disapproves of BBFS for the obvious reasons of much greater statistical risk of STD exposure than any form of uncovered oral, and of course the risk of unintended pregnancy.

I think there is many different factors of "risk" and such. I for one wouldn't go ask a steet walker with holes in her arm for a BBBJ ... The risk seem highter. Is it just my brain telling me or fact? You guys tell me. I feel when i see agency ladies or renown indies that they are safer. Are they for real or is it my brain? Once again you tell me. I tend to hope an SP that work this job 3-4 days a week is probably tested every 2 weeks or at least once a month. Is it the fact? I dunno...

I know that one day i could catch something. I sure hope not !!! But we have to know there is a little risk. I think any hobbyist knows it and is willing to take such risk. I love BBBJ, i love to do CIM and i love to be SW, i love to do COF too (altough this seem less risky) so CBJ would mean no CIM what so ever, that would sucks ... pun intended. I said many times and i will say it again, if CBJ become the norm, wich i hope it never does, i will definately see much much less SPs than i do now. In fact i would probably see only 1 or 2 a year and it would been when i would have to go to MTL for other stuff anyway. I love oral... Actually i could live in a mtl hobby scene being oral only (no FS like now) way before being CBJ only lol.

As for germany, i wonder if this law will be respected ...

 

[curly]

I read this thread and it makes me very perplex...

Let me state from the get go that I totally understand the need for rubber and that I am in no way in favor of BBFS.

However.....

It seems that we judge those people who ask for BBFS in the same way general society judge us, hobbiers: Harshly, black and white thinking without any empathy of any kind and with total lack of understanding of the motivation for doing it. Result: we do it anyway! Likely result: they will ask for it anyway....

For me, the solution lies in 1. empathy, and 2. education.

For #1, Ladies, can you imagine receiving oral sex through a rubber? Imagine if that's all you could get all your life? I think it is very human, stupid maybe but still very understandable to want to experience bb sex and feel your partner for real. I think it is only normal that, after fantasizing about it for so long, lonesome guys would want to try it whatever the risks. Guys, many of us do parachute jumping, rock climbing or other extreme sports. Same thing here: there is a risk, the risk perception and threshold is different for each individual, men tend to be glamorized when they take risks. To some, the risks of bbfs is assumable.

For #2: Ladies need to be more informed of their rights to refuse it and to the risks of doing it, I wholeheartedly agree. But also, guys must be sensitized to the fact that it is not only a risk to them, but also a risk to their partner. When we have a lady in front of us who is ready and willing to have affectuous or steamy sex with us, only an immense minority of us want to harm that person (ladies, please comment here....). We are generally grateful and caring to that person. Being sensitized to her risks, in my opinion, is key.

Combining #1 and #2, could a sensible approach look like this: if/when a lady is being asked for bbfs, instead of being insulted or slamming the door, what about her kindly and caringly talked to the client, explaining to them that they understand their lack of/diminished feeling through a rubber, explaining to them the reason they are not ready to assume that risk and convincingly offer to use their mouth and hands skillfully to make up for it? Ladies, do you think they would go for it? Guys, would you?

 

[ssj3]

The difference between parachute jumping, rock climbing, etc. is that it only affects that person. When you ask for BBFS you're risking the health of not only yourself but other people as well. I'm sorry but it's not the same. It doesn't matter if there's intent to harm..it's still harm.

 

[K Douglas]

I commend James for this stand. BBFS should not be tolerated. And those requesting it should be blacklisted. This is an important health issue. In no way should SP's be made to feel pressured or be put in the awkward position of having to refuse requests for this.

 

[curly]

The difference between parachute jumping, rock climbing, etc. is that it only affects that person. When you ask for BBFS you're risking the health of not only yourself but other people as well. I'm sorry but it's not the same. It doesn't matter if there's intent to harm..it's still harm.

I agree. What I'm saying is that in the mind of those requesting it, their consideration of risks stops with theirs, hence the parachute jumping example. In what I wrote above, I insisted on the need to sensitize them on the risk to others.

BBFS should not be tolerated. And those requesting it should be blacklisted. This is an important health issue. In no way should SP's be made to feel pressured or be put in the awkward position of having to refuse requests for this.

What if I rewrote your sentense like this: "Prostitution should not be tolerated. And those requesting it should be blacklisted. This is an important health issue. In no way should women be made to feel pressured or be put in the awkward position of having to refuse requests for this."

This is how many think of hobby, and doesn't it sound like the new law? Blame and shame? Does this prevent prostitution? Many argue it makes things worst..... For every problem, there is a solution simple, obvious and wrong.... If it was that simple, we would already have found a solution for it... Human nature is complex and not logical....

 

[Julia Sky]

Combining #1 and #2, could a sensible approach look like this: if/when a lady is being asked for bbfs, instead of being insulted or slamming the door, what about her kindly and caringly talked to the client, explaining to them that they understand their lack of/diminished feeling through a rubber, explaining to them the reason they are not ready to assume that risk and convincingly offer to use their mouth and hands skillfully to make up for it? Ladies, do you think they would go for it? Guys, would you?

I do both. I explain to them the reasons BBFS is not a good idea, but then I also slam the door, because I am insulted. I don't care why they do it. If you don't see a reason to be upset, then you wouldn't see a problem with someone robbing your bank account because they lack money either, the same way these guys potentially share STD's because they lack human warmth.

Sorry but to me there's no good reason to ask someone for this kind of service. There's a lot of things we want in life and we won't get because of the risks. Asking a girl bbfs to me is like fucking your best friend's wife. You can do it, your own right to take the risks you want, but it's still dumb and we should not try to condone it by ''understanding the reasons''. Your best friend wouldn't.

And no, most of us girls would not want to convincingly offer to use our mouth and hands skillfully to make up for it. If someone asks to do BBFS with me, better believe I'm not putting that D in my mouth lol

 

[curly]

I understand Julia. What I'm worried about is they are probably expecting this and will just ask someone else, just like the telemarketing guys expect you to hang up and know that with time they will get someone.

I'm thinking out loud here; what I'm looking for is an effective way to get through to their heart and mind and make them stop asking.

And I doubt blame and shame or rejection will do it. They are likely ashamed already and feel rejected already.

 

[curly]

The point I was trying to make with my long post was that if this industry does not self-regulate, it will face further regulation from the outside.
.

Correct..... the question is how to do this effectively...

Using the same enforcement strategy that LE use against hobbyists will likely yeald the same results... (or lack thereof...)

 

[Julia Sky]

I'm thinking out loud here; what I'm looking for is an effective way to get through to their heart and mind and make them stop asking.

There's no other way to do it unfortunately. If mentionning the risks isn't enough, then it means the guy doesn't care and won't stop asking. These guys either need to be diagnosed with aids to stop asking, or they already have it and don't care anymore. :/

 

[cloudsurf]

There is no guarantee that a woman who offers only safe GFE is going to be safe.
She may have fuck friends with whom she does BB.
She may seem angelic , wholesome and safe...... but somewhere in her past she got drunk or drugged at a party and had BB sex with 3 guys. It happens believe me it does.

 

[BookerL]

There is no guarantee that a woman who offers only safe GFE is going to be safe.
She may have fuck friends with whom she does BB.
She may seem angelic , wholesome and safe...... but somewhere in her past she got drunk or drugged at a party and had BB sex with 3 guys. It happens believe me it does.

You are so lovable Cloudsurf ,I have express this so many times ,to clients and SP 's .

had BB sex with 3 guys. It happens believe me it does.

Actually ,I have a anecdote about this ,
I was seeing a SP on a regular Basis ,3 for times a week 3 or 4 hours each times ,for close to a year,she had tiny waist and 30 inches hips ,super tight
she became friends with some of my girls and told one of them that she was in to gangbangs with
Bloods memebers gangbangers all of it BAreback .
I stop seeing her immediately
HAs a Booker driver that also a situation ,that I went thru many times ,girls have a tendency to talk about there sexual prowess between each other,as soon as I knew that BB was a part of it ,she was out .
Getting a confirmation from 2 or more different girls, that doesn't know each other ,has a certain reliability
Cheers
Booker

 

[ssj3]

I didn't get a chance to read your whole post until now Patron but you make some very salient points. I like your analogy to the line in the sand..makes perfect sense.

 

[Doggyluver]

I do both. I explain to them the reasons BBFS is not a good idea, but then I also slam the door, because I am insulted. I don't care why they do it. If you don't see a reason to be upset, then you wouldn't see a problem with someone robbing your bank account because they lack money either, the same way these guys potentially share STD's because they lack human warmth.

Sorry but to me there's no good reason to ask someone for this kind of service. There's a lot of things we want in life and we won't get because of the risks. Asking a girl bbfs to me is like fucking your best friend's wife. You can do it, your own right to take the risks you want, but it's still dumb and we should not try to condone it by ''understanding the reasons''. Your best friend wouldn't.

And no, most of us girls would not want to convincingly offer to use our mouth and hands skillfully to make up for it. If someone asks to do BBFS with me, better believe I'm not putting that D in my mouth lol

This is a wonderful response and I am thrilled to see that as a provider you have the attitude that zero contact with this type of individual makes the most sense. Unfortunately there are many providers who after refusing the BBFS request will provide DATY and BBBJ with CIM thinking nothing of the fact that they might have just contracted an STD and subsequently passed it along to another client. Thank you for being you

 

[Julia Sky]

Well it's just common sense. Thank you love !

 

[westwoody]

Regardless of the relative safety in some people's opinions no woman should be required to do this.
Many guys are really pushy and try all kinds of tricks.
Some send women several texts thinking if they harass them they will do it.
I have had guys ask via pm if I knew anyone who would do it.

Maybe because it is taboo some guys are obsessed with it.

 

[curly]

Maybe because it is taboo some guys are obsessed with it.

Nothing to do with taboo. It feels better, and for both partners. Proof: you continue to use a condom with a long-term exclusive bf/gf (pregnancy issues asside)? We are all curious about more powerful sexual experiences through all kinds of ways. Some through BDSM chocking (not my thing...), some through anal sex, some through BB... All of these are risky, some more, some less. Human nature I guess....

 

[Sol Tee Nutz]

It feels better, and for both partners. ...

I am guessing that some on this board have not been in a long term relationship where BB is a constant so they do not know what they are missing. For someone who is used to condoms I guess it would be OK, a CBJ for me does not work, prefer a good BBBJ over CFS any day. Being old and in a few long term relationships I got spoiled with the BB, would never do BBFS with a provider or someone I met in a pub though, at one point I was about to call up my ex for sex but my sane side got the best of that thought.

 

[BookerL]

Maybe because it is taboo some guys are obsessed with it.

That is true people are naturally attracted by the unknown ,the undiscovered ,the illegal , and the risk .

But when life of others is also at risk ,it is time to say no

Cheers

Booker