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treesx

New Member
Jan 17, 2012
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I'd say it takes less than 3 dates to get sex with online dating.
I think I'm probably not unattractive cuz I have women hitting on me a few times a year? But when you were born in eastern Asia in the 80s and raised by tough Asian parents, you are just super self conscious and have low self esteem. Also culturally there is a concept of "not bothering other/not to bring troubles to other". And it bothers me a LOOOOOT when telling someone I'm not intereted. So I'm super scared of being rejected because of self consciousness and low self esteem, and I don't want others feel bothered when rejecting me. I know people don't really give a shit it's only in my head, but I just can't get over it.
Dating app helps because if a girl is not interested all at, then there wont be a match. And that unloads a huge part of the burden I mentioned. And tbh I almost always end up sleeping with the ones I like. But I think it's becoming a problem now. I'm almost swiping on them everyday conpusively because it's almost a habit at this point since I've been on them for so long, and because of the idea of "next one may be a match".
I've had 1 long term relationship and I'm not against the idea of having one. There were a few girls I really liked and was interested in having a long term relationship, but as soon as I show some affection, the girls just ran away.
Friends of friends just never worked for me. I guess my friends' friends arent really my type lol.
Thanks a lot for reading my rant. I really appreciate the support:):)
Hi there what app are you using ? I have them all and have zéro success. Like zéro. I'm Asian too, not bad looking just getting old but dont look my age and in shape. I may need to rewrite my intro or feed it to chatgpt lol
 
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tonylau

Hi there what app are you using ? I have them all and have zéro success. Like zéro. I'm Asian too, not bad looking just getting old but dont look my age and in shape. I may need to rewrite my intro or feed it to chatgpt lol
all of them. FB dating and Hinge have the highest success rate though. Then Tinder, bumble, OKCupid
 
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tonylau

Without sounding hurtful, you know that most women in North America aren't attracted by Asians? If you rate yourself a 6-7, they are probably rating you a 2-3 (sorry man). Are there some sure, just probably kinda like looking for a needle in a haystack.

Also, don't know what age group you're looking at, but most girls aren't really looking at guys more than 5-10 years max. Again, are there some? Sure, but think of all the older dudes that might have an advantage over you... that haystack may be much larger than you think.

I don't know about you, but most of my female friends are 35+ and most of them would never waste their time on an app. The few I know of that do, you wouldn't want to meet (unless you enjoy excess baggage). I'll always suggest to go out and do things, mingle without the intention of "picking up" as it will make you look more confident and you have a greater chance of actually "picking up".

Just my 2 cents
What you said is absolutely true for older women(35+). For the younger generation, it's still not great but a lot better due to the influence of Kpop, Japanese Anime, Marvel Shangqi and other random anti racism shit. I'm 33 so I mainly date girls under 30, a few of them are actually really into Asian guys.
 
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tonylau

Of course, there are some, now ask them if they would date a 45 year old + asian dude that doesn't fit the mentionned style of asians (kpop etc). I'm sorry, unless they are really above average in height, looks , style or $, most Asians, Indians, Pakistani, are pretty much at the exact opposite in terms of desirability compared to their female counterparts and are literally SOL. Not saying there isn't a chance... just expanding as to why dating apps won't work for most of them. Its about the same as a really cute white guy but stands 5'2"... possible but won't be a panty dropper.
Yeah you are right. I'd say eastern Asians are actually getting popular. The rest not so much. Sad truth.
 
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vanhamm

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May 18, 2021
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When i was 25 i had a beach body longer hair and i look quite good, pick up happen everywhere and lots of time i got approach, but now at 51 gained weight hair thinned i guess i am on the other side of the fence.

The thing is most clubs i used to go to are now closed, but still baton rouge, belle et boeuf in Anjou i picked up a waitress there at 44 she was 23, and la cage is great too.
 

treesx

New Member
Jan 17, 2012
21
15
3
Without sounding hurtful, you know that most women in North America aren't attracted by Asians? If you rate yourself a 6-7, they are probably rating you a 2-3 (sorry man). Are there some sure, just probably kinda like looking for a needle in a haystack.

Also, don't know what age group you're looking at, but most girls aren't really looking at guys more than 5-10 years max. Again, are there some? Sure, but think of all the older dudes that might have an advantage over you... that haystack may be much larger than you think.

I don't know about you, but most of my female friends are 35+ and most of them would never waste their time on an app. The few I know of that do, you wouldn't want to meet (unless you enjoy excess baggage). I'll always suggest to go out and do things, mingle without the intention of "picking up" as it will make you look more confident and you have a greater chance of actually "picking up".

Just my 2 cents
No offence taken no worries. Totally aware of that.
Even if I'm really not bad as an Asian, I'm 40 + , but in décent shape. I get it that apps won't work for me. Just wanted it to see if it was me or anything else since my fellow brother seemed to have some success where i failed miserably.
But the key différence is age as he's 10 years younger than me. I rest my case. Its me and in person it'll have to be. Working on it.
Back to topic. Where to meet in person.
Have done meetups with mild success.
Thanks guys
 
T

tonylau

No offence taken no worries. Totally aware of that.
Even if I'm really not bad as an Asian, I'm 40 + , but in décent shape. I get it that apps won't work for me. Just wanted it to see if it was me or anything else since my fellow brother seemed to have some success where i failed miserably.
But the key différence is age as he's 10 years younger than me. I rest my case. Its me and in person it'll have to be. Working on it.
Back to topic. Where to meet in person.
Have done meetups with mild success.
Thanks guys
I know a guy, eastern Asian, a bit more than 10 years older than me but looks my age(I already look younger than my age but we Asians simply don't age haha), works in the sports industry and in great shape, pretty rich and successful. He uses bumble exclusively and gets a decent amount of matches. So maybe go to reddit to look for tips for dating app profiles, and you'll have your luck. But again, if you can do both dating apps AND in person, that's even better right?
 

AlmostMidaged

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Aug 9, 2020
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I’ve been looking for serious GF since Febuary. Went on 3 whole dates with 3 different women, and got 2 numbers that never tuned into anything. Shit is ridiculous discouraging. I’m planning to sign up for a recreational class or 2, and go to some events. I feel like summer will be better…
 

Ouaisoki

Active Member
Feb 9, 2022
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33
It doesn't have much to do with age.
Much younger guy here, decent looking, in above average shape.

However, one of my best friends is a 9+ super chad on the level of Chris Bumstead. For him the answer to "best pick up clubs or places in Montreal" is "basically everywhere". It's honestly annoying/frustrating to go anywhere with him. As an Asian looking guy, if an Asian girl wants to talk to me it's usually just to see if I can introduce her to my friend. Girls of other ethnicities mostly ignore me entirely, unless we're in some sort of group conversation for some reason. Yes, there are some girls that are influenced by anime and such and into Asian guys, but those are rare and usually some kind of weirdo. My theory is that most of the attractive girls (not just Asian, but especially Asian) have been ruined by porn and OnlyFans where you're seeing more and more super jacked white guys with huge dicks banging Asian hotties. Now this is all they fantasize about, because of FOMO and because hooking up with that kind of guy is how they show off to their friends. For example, if a guy has a particularly big one, they might ask to take a picture of it next to their forearm for size comparison so they can send it to their friends. Not that this happened to me, or could happen to me, but let's say I've seen the evidence.

Anyway. This is Montreal where meeting an escort is only a few text messages away, so who cares.

All of that said, one of the places I haven't seen mentioned here is Bord'Elle, surprisingly... because the name kind of gives it away. SP/MP/SB hookup hotspot if you have the looks and social skills.

I don't think it's because of porn & onlyfans.
The current beauty standard is set to western values - High Bridge nose, sharp jaw, round shaped eye, tall etc.
Well that's not what Asians have.

But as @Tony mentioned, it is changing with Asian pop culture & you can see more and more interracial couples with Asian male & non-Asian female (vs. White Male & Asian female - love u long time)
Everytime, I talk to girls and why they don't date Asians.
They will either mention the "beauty standard" or that actually they think that Asians are not interested in them because they don't get approached by Asians.

So yeah go out there and just chat.
 

rando555

Member
Jan 18, 2014
41
70
18
It doesn't have much to do with age.
Much younger guy here, decent looking, in above average shape.

However, one of my best friends is a 9+ super chad on the level of Chris Bumstead. For him the answer to "best pick up clubs or places in Montreal" is "basically everywhere". It's honestly annoying/frustrating to go anywhere with him. As an Asian looking guy, if an Asian girl wants to talk to me it's usually just to see if I can introduce her to my friend. Girls of other ethnicities mostly ignore me entirely, unless we're in some sort of group conversation for some reason. Yes, there are some girls that are influenced by anime and such and into Asian guys, but those are rare and usually some kind of weirdo. My theory is that most of the attractive girls (not just Asian, but especially Asian) have been ruined by porn and OnlyFans where you're seeing more and more super jacked white guys with huge dicks banging Asian hotties. Now this is all they fantasize about, because of FOMO and because hooking up with that kind of guy is how they show off to their friends. For example, if a guy has a particularly big one, they might ask to take a picture of it next to their forearm for size comparison so they can send it to their friends. Not that this happened to me, or could happen to me, but let's say I've seen the evidence.

Anyway. This is Montreal where meeting an escort is only a few text messages away, so who cares.

All of that said, one of the places I haven't seen mentioned here is Bord'Elle, surprisingly... because the name kind of gives it away. SP/MP/SB hookup hotspot if you have the looks and social skills.

I think it depends a ton on your geographical area as well in the US

There are places where I feel like a second class citizen (deep down south or areas with mostly first gen / some second gen asians) and places where I feel the exact same as anyone else.

My white friends that are maybe 9/10+ faces (legit model types) bang maybe more girls than me but they all admitted that I bang way hotter chicks than them when I do so it's kind of amusing we were both jealous of each other at times.

Anyways going back to the topic, the more introverted SPs I met mentioned that they like to use Tinder instead of clubbing or going to bars
 

manfred

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Dec 27, 2023
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guys hello everyone! I'm recently in Montreal. I wanted to ask you to recommend me dating sites that work with real people and actually work. thank you in advance
 

bodick7

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Dec 27, 2012
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When i was 25 i had a beach body longer hair and i look quite good, pick up happen everywhere and lots of time i got approach, but now at 51 gained weight hair thinned i guess i am on the other side of the fence.
I was not attractive at 25 and now at 58, I noticed I can make turn some female heads on beach for good reasons…a late bloomer?…
 
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vanhamm

Well-Known Member
May 18, 2021
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I was not attractive at 25 and now at 58, I noticed I can make turn some female heads on beach for good reasons…a late bloomer?…
I am losing weight now and getting fit, you are not a late bloomer there is a market for older men, and i notice this too some younger women prefer older men.

You have 3 types of younger women, the first type is the one that would not date an older man if he was the last man on earth those you see right away, when you look at them they turn their heads and also some of them look frustrated. The second type are the ones that want to try an older man but are not ready to date they heard that sex is better with an older man more experience a lot more sensual than the younger guys who only think about themselves. The third type is the women who want to settle down and want something serious and know they won't get it with the younger men.

I was 44 and we went to belle in boeuf in anjou, that night the waitress came on to me she was 23, we hit it off for 6 months but she wanted kids and since i already lost 2 houses due to separation and did not want to get serious i broke off the whole thing but 23 and still pretty hot.
 

bodick7

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Dec 27, 2012
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that sex is better with an older man more experience a lot more sensual than the younger guys who only think about themselves.
That's exactly what an SP told me after I had slowly and delicately performed daty 2 years ago.
Now, I just met a new gem and I asked her (half an hour ago) to show me how to make her squirt. She accepted and I told her I felt clumsy but excited like a teen. Ha!Ha!
Never too late to learn new stuff.:)
 

vanhamm

Well-Known Member
May 18, 2021
362
339
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That's exactly what an SP told me after I had slowly and delicately performed daty 2 years ago.
Now, I just met a new gem and I asked her (half an hour ago) to show me how to make her squirt. She accepted and I told her I felt clumsy but excited like a teen. Ha!Ha!
Never too late to learn new stuff.:)
Be carful what SP tell you remember you pay them, i have been seeing the same SP for about 4 years now she gives me a great service and she text me everyday, never free of course, she told me that she compliments her clients and its all fake, she also told me i looked like Jack Reacher, yeah i am big but more like Fat Reacher right now, you see its all lies, i told he to her face to stop saying stupidity like that because it does not work on me.

Forget about SP i am talking about real live women, they are the ones you need to focus on. SP are just for fun and games then its over.
 

bodick7

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Dec 27, 2012
1,311
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Be carful what SP tell you remember you pay them, i have been seeing the same SP for about 4 years now she gives me a great service and she text me everyday, never free of course, she told me that she compliments her clients and its all fake, she also told me i looked like Jack Reacher, yeah i am big but more like Fat Reacher right now, you see its all lies, i told he to her face to stop saying stupidity like that because it does not work on me.

Forget about SP i am talking about real live women, they are the ones you need to focus on. SP are just for fun and games then its over.
Took some notes from your comments. Now...
- I just can't chase real ones... I'm with one and I'm ok with my situation and I'm focused on her since almost 30 years.
- She give me an excellent all included service at an excellent rate.
- We exchange texts because we like to do it so but she won't bug me if I don't.
- I had my bad experiences and won't fall into that.
- She has a regular job and only have few gents. I'm only there to provide her some fun while rounding her end of months.
- I do hobby since 15 years+ so I don't have much to learn but I still learn new stuff.
I just try to be a good gent so we have great time together and that's it. ...it's over.
 
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bodick7

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Dec 27, 2012
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i have been seeing the same SP for about 4 years
I have been seeing the same SP since more than 12 years. We still have great sex together, she has her life and I have mind.
 
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