Random thoughts: What’s on your mind lately? Part 2

[2fast2slow]

I'm sure that question has been studied from many perspectives (feminist and others), but why do most young women nowadays wear extremely revealing or tight clothes? I'll give you an example that I witnessed recently: a cegep student with very visible cleavage on the bus was uncomfortable that a man (not me) was looking at her cleavage and discreetly asked her friend to shield her from the man. But why is she showing that much cleavage? Is it to attract men or something else. I really don't understand.

i went cycling around downtown today, and wow, saw a lot of very attractive women, like 50 lol. I do find that some women dress in more revealing clothes these days - especially in the city when the weather is hot. But i don't mind
I have always loved to people watch, and yes attractive women are the highlights for me. But I always try to be very discreet about it. I have seen a lot of guys gawk and it is definitely creepy.

 

[Lunaseraphim]

It's normal to dress in shorts and t-shirts or small dresses when it's hot.

Women enjoy feeling good about themselves, and they usually dress sexy or wear pretty outfits to boost their self esteem. They are doing it for themselves usually, and for their friends. Girls love looking hot together and having fun. I don't notice that young women wear more revealing clothes than they did 5-10 years ago personally. Trends come and go, and people don't dress the same way in the summer as they do in the winter. I'm personally glad that women have the choice to wear whatever they want nowadays.

There's also a question of body type. If I wear the same outfit as the girl you noticed, I won't have anyone staring at my cleavage because I have small breasts. Because I'm petite and don't have a big ass or big tits, my body doesn't get sexualized as much. Why should this girl dress differently just bc her chest is larger? She deserves to wear anything she wants. I don't think that wearing something that shows cleavage is an invitation to gawk. You can notice it but staring is not nice and it can make someone feel really unsafe.. I genuinely don't believe someone's way of dressing is an excuse to make them feel bad or do something non consensual to them.

Surely young women aren't in the metro or walking downtown wearing micro bikinis and stripper heels. (which would be, obviously inappropriate)

 

[LC18]

Some women dress for themselves, some dress for men, some dress for women.

We are lucky that it is more accepted now to dress lightly. Men get in trouble now when trying to touch us, not always but more often than before.

With internet, if a man touches you on the street it is easy to film him and blast it on social media. Even if you’re not the one doing it, there’s always someone around with a phone ready to film.

Body positivity also plays a big role in it. You no longer have to be a Victoria secret angel to be praised or complimented for showing skin.

Yea you’re allowed to look. You can compliment respectfully but you cannot touch without consent and you cannot bug someone until they give in

 

[Lunaseraphim]

Some women dress for themselves, some dress for men, some dress for women.

We are lucky that it is more accepted now to dress lightly. Men get in trouble now when trying to touch us, not always but more often than before.

With internet, if a man touches you on the street it is easy to film him and blast it on social media. Even if you’re not the one doing it, there’s always someone around with a phone ready to film.

Body positivity also plays a big role in it. You no longer have to be a Victoria secret angel to be praised or complimented for showing skin.

Yea you’re allowed to look. You can compliment respectfully but you cannot touch without consent and you cannot bug someone until they give in

there's also a difference between looking and smiling vs gawking or staring directly at specific body parts... if someone was staring at my chest in public i wouldn't like it either.
and no matter how somebody is dressed, it won't prevent them from getting sexually harassed. even if she is wearing a huge sweater and sweatpants a woman could be the victim of sexual harassment.

 

[2fast2slow]

just this past friday a young lady stopped me on my bike stopped me for directions. I actually had to get off my bike and lead us to the sidewalk because we were on Sherbrooke street 10 feet from the sidewalk corner.
She said her phone died and asked if I could pull out mine for directions. She was a young north african french speaking lady (algerian or something) with beautiful light green eyes and she was dressed up, going somewhere semi-formal, she was wearing a light grey jacket and a silky white low cut blouse revealing her very ample busom. So there we were, close together, both looking at my phone. I'm litteraly hanging over the top of her blouse. What she did not realize is there was a voice in my head sceaming: ''DONT LOOK AT HER BREASTS! DONT LOOK AT HER BREASTS!'' the whole time. The urge to look down was very difficult to suppress. She thanked me and started walking away, and immediately a young doorman at the hotel we were in front of asked the lady if she needed help (lol men) to which she replied no.

 

[MCTJ]

I don't find that women are dressing sexier than they did 5-10 years ago.

I agree with you in general, but there's one thing in particular that we see much more often than just a few years ago: the braless look with nipples poking through the clothing. Living in society comes with social norms. For instance, you stand in line at Starbucks for your coffee. If you skip the line, you are violating a norm (even if there's no law against skipping the line) and your fellow citizen will rightly be annoyed or even angry at your behavior. In Western society, we generally agree that erogenous zones are covered by clothing in public (with few exceptions), for people of all genders. My personal opinion is that the braless look with nipples poking through is very close to crossing a boundary for how it is socially acceptable to dress in public. I agree that social norms change over time, and that for reasons that are varied and complex, a sizable number of women may have decided to dress in more sexually provocative ways in the 21st century.

 

[Lunaseraphim]

I agree with you in general, but there's one thing in particular that we see much more often than just a few years ago: the braless look with nipples poking through the clothing. Living in society comes with social norms. For instance, you stand in line at Starbucks for your coffee. If you skip the line, you are violating a norm (even if there's no law against skipping the line) and your fellow citizen will rightly be annoyed or even angry at your behavior. In Western society, we generally agree that erogenous zones are covered by clothing in public (with few exceptions), for people of all genders. My personal opinion is that the braless look with nipples poking through is very close to crossing a boundary for how it is socially acceptable to dress in public. I agree that social norms change over time, and that for reasons that are varied and complex, a sizable number of women may have decided to dress in more sexually provocative ways in the 21st century.

The braless look isn't new. I've studied fashion a lot and look at many blogs and read a lot of fashion magazines. There isn't actually a braless trend going on right now specifically. People going braless has been a thing since the 70's. If someone is wearing a top and no bra, their breasts are still covered so your argument doesn't make any sense. I don't walk around looking at women and checking if they are wearing a bra or not and trying to see if their nipples are poking through their shirt but that's just me. Bras are uncomfortable and I can see why somebody would not want to wear one.

And yes, you are right, in the 21st century it's more acceptable to dress sexy than it was in the previous century, but it's been the 21st century for almost 25 years now. I also remember as a child in the 90's seeing a lot of girls dressed very ''provocatively'' and seeing fashion magazines my mom had from the early 90's that had a lot of pretty sexy fashion. I simply don't see what's so bad about women dressing the way they want to. Obviously some things are inappropriate and breaching consent, like being topless in public where there are kids would be inappropriate, but I don't understand the problem.

 

[Giselle Montreal]

My personal opinion is that the braless look with nipples poking through is very close to crossing a boundary for how it is socially acceptable to dress in public. I agree that social norms change over time, and that for reasons that are varied and complex, a sizable number of women may have decided to dress in more sexually provocative ways in the 21st century.

Men in bicycle shorts should strap their penis inwards so we wouldn't see a "bump" in their tiny shorts.
Men should always wear a shirt in public because you know, many men have a nipple kink and love to have them licked and played with, they should cover their erogenous zone.

I would love to have the freedom to be shirtless in public because I'm too warm and I'm sweating, but my breast is sexualized and not simply a part of my body so I can't. So yes, I will continue not to wear a bra even though my nipples are poking, because it happens to men too, so why would I be ashamed?

 

[Lunaseraphim]

Men in bicycle shorts should strap their penis inwards so we wouldn't see a "bump" in their tiny shorts.
Men should always wear a shirt in public because you know, many men have a nipple kink and love to have them licked and played with, they should cover their erogenous zone.

I would love to have the freedom to be shirtless in public because I'm too warm and I'm sweating, but my breast is sexualized and not simply a part of my body so I can't. So yes, I will continue not to wear a bra even though my nipples are poking, because it happens to men too, so why would I be ashamed?

THIS.
Also like I said different body types get sexualized differently. Because I'm petite and not super curvy I have the privilege of being able to wear tight clothes or sexy clothes without it being seen as inappropriate, but for someone else it would be frowned upon.

 

[MCTJ]

The braless look isn't new. I've studied fashion a lot and look at many blogs and read a lot of fashion magazines. There isn't actually a braless trend going on right now specifically. People going braless has been a thing since the 70's. If someone is wearing a top and no bra, their breasts are still covered so your argument doesn't make any sense.

I mentioned being "very close" to crossing a boundary, because yes, they are still covered, and I don't think a social consensus has been reached about whether it is socially acceptable or not to adopt this look in public.

I am aware that the brasless look isn't new, but in my own observations, it does seem to have become more common in recent years. There is no data to back this up, so this is purely a matter of perception. For this reason, and because I don't want to highjack the thread, this will be my last comment on this topic.

I also want to make clear that I do not want to police women's looks. They should be free to do as they please. The debate is whether a given look violates social norms with respect to what is acceptable in public. Even if the answer were yes, I would not advocate for any coercive measures, only for the right to freely express my opinion on the topic.

 

[Lunaseraphim]

I mentioned being "very close" to crossing a boundary, because yes, they are still covered, and I don't think a social consensus has been reached about whether it is socially acceptable or not to adopt this look in public.

I am aware that the brasless look isn't new, but in my own observations, it does seem to have become more common in recent years. There is no data to back this up, so this is purely a matter of perception. For this reason, and because I don't want to highjack the thread, this will be my last comment on this topic.

I also want to make clear that I do not want to police women's looks. They should be free to do as they please. The debate is whether a given look violates social norms with respect to what is acceptable in public. Even if the answer were yes, I would not advocate for any coercive measures, only for the right to freely express my opinion on the topic.

I think for me, a way of presenting oneself in public would be inappropriate if it violates consent. Like for example a man walking around with his dick out of his pants in an area where there are many kids, or someone walking around in extreme fetish gear near a school.

But even that can get dangerous because a lot of people will say that anyone who deviates from the norm is violating consent.

 

[Giselle Montreal]

I think the title of this thread should be "Random discussions".

 

[Lunaseraphim]

There should be holographic and iridescent condom wrappers

 

[ThunderLipps]

Pumped for the Deep Purple / Yes concert tomorrow, mushrooms are lemon tecking as I type.
Fook, just found out it is tonight. If I didn't invite my son over for a BBQ ( he mentioned it ) I would have missed it. Being retired one day is the same as the other

 

[Julia Sky]

Tired of people who text, ghost when they hear the rates, but then text again months or even years later, often more than once. Like they forgot they couldn't afford the service...

Now when these types say "Hey, how much" I answer with "Too much for you, have a nice day" lol

 

[LC18]

Tired of people who text, ghost when they hear the rates, but then text again months ot even years later, often more than once. Like they forgot they couldn't afford the service...

Now when these types say "Hey, how much" I answer with "Too much for you, have a nice day" lol

They’re hoping you’ll say: today is your lucky day 90% off on all services

 

[Lunaseraphim]

Tired of people who text, ghost when they hear the rates, but then text again months or even years later, often more than once. Like they forgot they couldn't afford the service...

Now when these types say "Hey, how much" I answer with "Too much for you, have a nice day" lol

This is so infuriating.

 

[LC18]

Today was a good day

 

[Lunaseraphim]

Today was a good day

I had a good day too!

 

[MCTJ]

I think it's a shame that women have to endure all the side effects of the pill (on the body and the mind) including those that make sex less enjoyable, because a lot of men don't want to wear a condom. It's literally the simplest mean of contraception we have, totally free of side effects, and highly effective.

(There's a trend of women turning to natural contraception (calendar-based), but it has to be done very carefully, and preferentially in addition to condom use or the pull-out method.)