Random thoughts: What’s on your mind lately? Part 2

[Lunaseraphim]

Sophie Margiela? lol paste as plain text doesn't work​

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There are some that market their self as autistic that aren't irritating. In Canada and the US most providers on the spectrum don't market their self that way for safety reasons but allegedly in the Netherlands and some other places it's not that dangerous to reference being autistic in an ad. I'm not a Dutch provider but I have heard that from providers outside the US and Canada.​

no, I already forgot her name but it's not sophie margiela. I think it's dangerous or at least a bad idea to reference something like this anywhere honestly. i've already revealed that i have adhd somewhere here on this forum, and i routinely get textapp messages making fun of me for it. that's just my opinion tho. also when as a provider in your ads or social media account you reference to being disabled or having certain political opinions or identities, you risk attracting people with bad intentions who are angry for various reasons.. in my opinion it's not the right place for it, and it can be unsafe. as an artist and in my personal life i express what i think and who i am openly tho

i guess in the netherlands prostitution is legalized, so it's less underground, maybe

 

[CLOUD 500]

I think in North America women don't tend to hire male companions unfortunately. I know they exist, but there are very few male escorts who only cater to women.. I think there are cultural reasons associated with it but I'm not really sure what they are and how I could explain this.

Because a woman can walk into any place a bar for example and if she asks a man to have a sex I am willing to bet that almost no man will refuse sex. That is why. In this respect women especially young women in their 20s have it so easy. Hence why men paying for sex exists.

 

[Lunaseraphim]

Because a woman can walk into any place a bar for example and if she asks a man to have a sex I am willing to bet that almost no man will refuse sex. That is why. In this respect women especially young women in their 20s have it so easy. Hence why men paying for sex exists.

I have clients who could easily have sex, but they don't want to go to bars and seduce someone or use dating apps so they prefer paying. But you do have a point, men are less likely to refuse sex, because there is less of a danger for them to accept. I don't like random hook ups but even if I did, I would be afraid of going home with a stranger I met at a bar.

I think that also women are educated to be ashamed of their own sexual needs, so they would feel shy about hiring escorts maybe. There's an idea that women prefer romance and men prefer sex, but you'd be surprised by how many men need to build some sort of connection before doing it. I think men are taught that sex is the most valuable form of intimacy they can have, but a lot of men actually like to cuddle and hold hands. I think far more men pay for sex for other reasons than just being horny. Obviously they will not refuse to have sex.. but the problem is more like they are touch starved and lonely.

A lot of straight women exchange non sexual intimacy with their friends..

 

[CLOUD 500]

I have clients who could easily have sex, but they don't want to go to bars and seduce someone or use dating apps so they prefer paying.

I am not sure about that. No one wants to be a customer. It is not a pleasant thing. Each man has their reasons to book an escort. Customers paying for sex comprise a small minority of society, it is not the norm.

But you do have a point, men are less likely to refuse sex, because there is less of a danger for them to accept. I don't like random hook ups but even if I did, I would be afraid of going home with a stranger I met at a bar. I think that also women are educated to be ashamed of their own sexual needs. There's an idea that women prefer romance and men prefer sex, but you'd be surprised by how many men need to build some sort of connection before doing it. I think men are taught that sex is the most valuable form of intimacy they can have, but a lot of men actually like to cuddle and hold hands.

It does not have to be even bars. It could be anywhere, a place you work at, at your school, etc.. Do you really think if some pretty girl in the same class asking a boy to have sex he would refuse? What the chances of that? Here is an analogy, the woman is the keyhole and the man is the key. You need the right key to unlock the hole. A man has to work very hard to convince a woman to have sex with him. The woman decides which is why if it went the other way not much man will say no. Sure they like to cuddle and hold hands, but when it comes down to it which man will refuse sex? That is why a man who is a virgin is shamed but a woman who is a virgin is praised.

 

[Lunaseraphim]

It does not have to be even bars. It could be anywhere, a place you work at, at your school, etc.. Do you really think if some pretty girl in the same class asking a boy to have sex he would refuse? What the chances of that? Here is an analogy, the woman is the keyhole and the man is the key. You need the right key to unlock the hole. A man has to work very hard to convince a woman to have sex with him. The woman decides which is why if it went the other way not much man will say no. Sure they like to cuddle and hold hands, but when it comes down to it which man will refuse sex? That is why a man who is a virgin is shamed but a woman who is a virgin is praised.

It doesn't seem like you read my comment properly.. What I initially said is that girls won't go up to men and ask them for sex as often, because it's dangerous for them to do so, or they risk being shamed for it. From a very young age women frequently get sexual comments in person and online, dick pics, cat calls, sometimes gross comments by family members etc. We get sexually harassed all the time, so we are guarded. Over time it can make certain women get turned off by the idea of sex, or we want to keep it for a relationship or with someone we care about. I've heard so many stories of teenage girls getting bullied and called sluts for having sex with their classmates, this doesn't happen to men.

My comment about guys enjoying to cuddle and hold hands has to do with why they pay for sex, because society teaches guys that sex is the ultimate forms of intimacy and they hire escorts when they need intimacy, are touch starved, lonely, need connection etc. The paragraph above is why women may feel less interested in paying for sex because it's offered to us and even shoved in our faces all the time. I think also a woman may feel even worse about herself if she wants to pay for intimacy because it could mean she's not even attractive enough to get it for free.

 

[CLOUD 500]

It doesn't seem like you read my comment properly.. What I initially said is that girls won't go up to men and ask them for sex as often, because it's dangerous for them to do so, or they risk being shamed for it. From a very young age women frequently get sexual comments in person and online, dick pics, cat calls, sometimes gross comments by family members etc. We get sexually harassed all the time, so we are guarded. Over time it can make certain women get turned off by the idea of sex, or we want to keep it for a relationship or with someone we care about. I've heard so many stories of teenage girls getting bullied and called sluts for having sex with their classmates, this doesn't happen to men.

I did read it, but I am not sure you understand either. I am talking about in places with people that you know for example in school. I mean with the vision you have here it would be a miracle for men and women to meet. Not everyone has large social circles to get introduced to others. In the 90s meeting women at bars was a thing. I known couples who got married in meeting on airplanes.

My comment about guys enjoying to cuddle and hold hands has to do with why they pay for sex, because society teaches guys that sex is the ultimate forms of intimacy and they hire escorts when they need intimacy, are touch starved, lonely, need connection etc. The paragraph above is why women may feel less interested in paying for sex because it's offered to us and even shoved in our faces all the time. I think also a woman may feel even worse about herself if she wants to pay for intimacy because it could mean she's not even attractive enough to get it for free.

I agree with the latter part of your paragraph. But your last sentence also could mean the same thing for a man, that a man has no game to get a woman for sex so has to pay for it? It is just as bad. Part of a man's ego is to be able to pick up a woman, a man is cool to his buddies. It is the way things are. I maintain what I said, no one wants to be a customer but each man has their own personal reasons to pay for it.

 

[LeDodo]

In college a mainlander friend (I know in Hong Kong Cantonese is big and mainland Mandarin and Hong Kong Cantonese have different slang as I study languages) told me "dog" means male sex worker in mainlander slang. He said he was very shocked when he found out that dog is used very differently in the English speaking world.

I speak Cantonese and mandarin as well but yes I like studying different languages too. And yes it is interesting how slang originates because language is really about culture and how you appropriate it as well above just pure linguistic.
Even in English or French we can see that or even between France French and Quebec French as well.

 

[LeDodo]

"idolization of male westerners"

I've met multiple Asian women who trash talk about Asian men and boast about only dating White men. At least three. It's sad. I never hear Black women bragging about only dating a specific ethnicity but maybe they do. It's sad how media is like 90% of what shapes what people are into.

When I was living in China, I had classmates who were backpacking with no plans and reservations. They almost surf couch in Chinese families they bumped into during the day (or night ...). Thing was that because they are foreigners they were welcomed with wild open arms lol
Even me with some classmates (foreigner looking, as for me I am Asian/Chinese looking) when we were wandering in Beijing with our suitcases, we got approached by a lady our of nowhere who wanted to give us directions to our hotel (without asking her ...) and on top of that telling us her husband is like a scientist and she is lonely at home ... Lol

 

[LeDodo]

I agree with the latter part of your paragraph. But your last sentence also could mean the same thing for a man, that a man has no game to get a woman for sex so has to pay for it? It is just as bad. Part of a man's ego is to be able to pick up a woman, a man is cool to his buddies. It is the way things are. I maintain what I said, no one wants to be a customer but each man has their own personal reasons to pay for it.

But for that I think how perception of a woman paying for services vs a man paying for services are differents.
A bit the same as you mentioned about the perception that a virgin man is shamed whereas a virgin woman is praised.

 

[Rebaynia]

no, I already forgot her name but it's not sophie margiela. I think it's dangerous or at least a bad idea to reference something like this anywhere honestly. i've already revealed that i have adhd somewhere here on this forum, and i routinely get textapp messages making fun of me for it. that's just my opinion tho. also when as a provider in your ads or social media account you reference to being disabled or having certain political opinions or identities, you risk attracting people with bad intentions who are angry for various reasons.. in my opinion it's not the right place for it, and it can be unsafe. as an artist and in my personal life i express what i think and who i am openly tho

i guess in the netherlands prostitution is legalized, so it's less underground, maybe

I guess I don't advertise with What diagnosis I have, but express how I tend to be, and how I think. I will only say as far as neurodivergent. Those who think similarly understand and gravitate it seems, to people who exhibit similar thinking patterns that match theirs. I don't hide who I am, I am pretty open about it. I couldn't hide it if I tried, but I also don't use it as a badge to make it ok to be inappropriate. (Assuming that is what this provider does. I don't know who is being spoken about, just know it isn't me, eugenics yeesh.)

I'm not sure how it is dangerous for someone to know, I think I am who I am and it helps if they know what to expect. My triggers and reactions are my own responsibility, not an excuse to just do whatever. Whatever it is, it seems to add to my charm. It is whatever the vibe is that seems to emanate, and thankfully it receives good reactions.

 

[Valentina Amante]

Of course it’s trendy now to scream “eugenics” especially over that recent Sydney Sweeney ad. Meanwhile, the same brand has run DEI campaigns featuring black women, they/thems, and obese black they thems hahaha… But now that a blonde white woman’s the face, it’s a crisis. White people are 9% of the global population - I thought minority representation was supposed to be a good thing? Not everything is about race.

I’ve seen garbage written about me recently online. A black provider claiming I’m “more privileged” because I’m white…? Where’s the extra privilege I have? People are really out here stretching reality to feel oppressed. What, now I’m supposed to feel ashamed that I’m white? Yeah, not happening. It’s okay to be white. Real hilarious how this black SP preaches oppression while spewing racist takes and begging for applause. Sounds like projection. Keep your self-hate to yourself, I’m not subscribing.

We’re living in a world full of emotionally fragile adults desperate for validation, clinging to a victimhood mentality and expecting blind agreement. Disagreeing with them suddenly makes you Satan.

Here’s some advice: if you haven’t had real conversations or multiple interactions with someone, maybe don’t go around calling them horrible. Spreading rumors and painting people as villains based on hearsay makes you look horrible - not them.

People cling to biased narratives just to stay loyal to their little online clique - all while the person they’re dragging isn’t even there to defend themselves. Says a lot about how cult-like some SP circles really are.

Thankfully, most people have half a brain and can see it for what it is and without needing to start threads begging for agreement. LOL. This mean girl mob mentality is tired. Many need to learn how to handle dissent without spiralling into smear campaigns.

You know what I truly think this is about? It’s about people not agreeing with their personal narrative. I see it happen all the time. It’s about control. That’s all. It’s not even about being white, black, gay, trans, autistic. It’s really about controlling and hating people for having different opinions. Time to grow up.

Anyway - the girl you’re talking about sounds cool. Drop her @ while you’re at it.

 

[Rebaynia]

I am not sure about that. No one wants to be a customer. It is not a pleasant thing. Each man has their reasons to book an escort. Customers paying for sex comprise a small minority of society, it is not the norm.

Actually, I have met a few lovely men who providers are their choice option, because they don't want a full relationship with demands on them, and that a provider meets their needs, without being too much. It will likely cost the same in the end with no messy emotions for them to deal with.

To meet someone off of dating sites, or out in the wild, means they would then have someone demanding for a relationship, or their time, blowing up their phone, and for them that is something they want to avoid. The price doesn't matter, because they likely would have had to spend similar, if not more on a gf over the same amount of time.

 

[LeDodo]

I am not sure about that. No one wants to be a customer. It is not a pleasant thing. Each man has their reasons to book an escort. Customers paying for sex comprise a small minority of society, it is not the norm..

I don't mind being a customer (except maybe for the connection/boundaries part) I do have my reasons to book an escort. Of course sex is part of it but not only.
Maybe some people find in booking an escort a safe space for their thinking and sexual doing.

 

[themonk83]

I just googled Aella and I must say I'm not a fan of what I just read...!

i'm so sorry. She is known as the no shower girl.

We shall not talk about this anymore

 

[Mandouke]

but each man has their own personal reasons to pay for it.

Yes. Indeed. You pay for it one way or the other.

Might as well pay for it by the hour rather than for a lifetime, considering the social construct of the relationship.

 

[jeffmathers]

Yeah. She is the only one I can think of that market herself as autistic. Gorgeous but seem to be rage baiting a lot. Very off-putting

I did read it, but I am not sure you understand either. I am talking about in places with people that you know for example in school. I mean with the vision you have here it would be a miracle for men and women to meet. Not everyone has large social circles to get introduced to others. In the 90s meeting women at bars was a thing. I known couples who got married in meeting on airplanes.

I agree with the latter part of your paragraph. But your last sentence also could mean the same thing for a man, that a man has no game to get a woman for sex so has to pay for it? It is just as bad. Part of a man's ego is to be able to pick up a woman, a man is cool to his buddies. It is the way things are. I maintain what I said, no one wants to be a customer but each man has their own personal reasons to pay for it.

"t is the way things are. I maintain what I said, no one wants to be a customer but each man has their own personal reasons to pay for it."
I know some American high end providers that have been hired by millionaires and billionaires. One of the reasons millionaires, billionaires, professional athletes, etc will hire providers is that it's less hassle than civilian dating. A person can be direct and say "I want to fly to Europe, go to a resort for a week, I see your 1 week fmty rate is [her rate]" etc and it's straightforward.

No matter how much "game" you have civilian dating is still more painful than just being able to find an escort. Think about it this way too. Would you want to spend hundreds of hours swiping on dating apps if you were a billionaire? Anthony Bourdain was rich and I totally understand why he hired a friend of mine along with tons of other providers. He wrote about being a client also.

 

[Fradi]

Great. Now I want a foursome that includes you, Lena, myself and a very lucky someone.

Seems you are an extremely popular duo partner.

 

[Lunaseraphim]

I did read it, but I am not sure you understand either. I am talking about in places with people that you know for example in school. I mean with the vision you have here it would be a miracle for men and women to meet. Not everyone has large social circles to get introduced to others. In the 90s meeting women at bars was a thing. I known couples who got married in meeting on airplanes.

I agree with the latter part of your paragraph. But your last sentence also could mean the same thing for a man, that a man has no game to get a woman for sex so has to pay for it? It is just as bad. Part of a man's ego is to be able to pick up a woman, a man is cool to his buddies. It is the way things are. I maintain what I said, no one wants to be a customer but each man has their own personal reasons to pay for it.

No, that's not what I meant at all, you still misunderstood what I said..

I meant that women no matter what get sexually harassed everywhere they go and propositioned for sex when it's unwanted, and now, with the internet you don't even get away from it in the safety of your own home. Things are different now, a lot of girls I know started getting harassed by men online at 12 or 13 years old.. I did as well. What I said is that combined with the shame that women have been taught about their own sexuality, the value they place on how attractive men think they are (which means they should be getting romanced by someone if they are attractive enough.. which isn't the truth), and the fact that women are kind of afraid of being left alone with a male stranger, they are less likely to hire a male escort. There is much more emphasis on how conventionally attractive women are in society vs men.

I also specifically said earlier that a lot of men who pay for sex are attractive and do have game, they just don't want to go through the process of trying to pick up someone at a bar or go on dating apps, which is exhausting for a lot of people. A lot of men who hire escorts are married or in a relationship.. Or a lot of men are just on a business trip and don't want to be alone the whole time, even if they have friends and women they talk to at home.

I also agree with you lol it's not easy to meet people like it used to be because people don't talk to each other in person anymore, for various societal reasons.. But it's like you said, in female friend groups, people don't really egg each other on to pick up men like that. People are hoping for romantic situations usually and not just sex or short term relationships, generally.. Those are all very general statements obviously.

 

[Lunaseraphim]

But for that I think how perception of a woman paying for services vs a man paying for services are differents.
A bit the same as you mentioned about the perception that a virgin man is shamed whereas a virgin woman is praised.

That's exactly my point. It's taboo regardless, but it's a lot more common for men to pay for these services and in a lot of cultures and social groups men talk about this and do it together. A lot of clients told me they found out about merb or leolist or tryst through their colleagues and friends. When I worked at a MP, groups of friends would come in together.. I've also heard of men hiring escorts for their son. Hell, we're in a forum where a bunch of men discuss hiring escorts and review them. There isn't an equivalent of that for women, and if you look for male escorts who only cater to women you might find one or two in Montreal and that's it. That's because there is no demand for it, and the way it's being presented isn't appealing to us. The escort services we were talking about for women in Asia are very heavily oriented towards romance and fulfilling a very different type of fantasy..

Of course, we can all criticize this. I'm sure a lot of women could benefit from hiring a SP, male or not. A lot more women than we'd think enjoy casual sex.. And a lot of men do need romance and tenderness when they seek these types of services, which isn't something that is often highlighted here, because the goal is to appear ''cool'' to other men and avoid being called a simp or whatever which seems almost the equivalent of calling another man ''gay''.. (chatgpt, am I gay because I gave a hug to the escort I hired and asked her questions about her favorite music? lol) But seriously, I think this is why there are so many men who ''fall in love'' with SP.

I was also thinking about this phenomenon of older women doing sex tourism in other countries and hiring men for a couple weeks to spend time with them..

 

[LeDodo]

That's exactly my point. It's taboo regardless, but it's a lot more common for men to pay for these services and in a lot of cultures and social groups men talk about this and do it together. A lot of clients told me they found out about merb or leolist or tryst through their colleagues and friends. When I worked at a MP, groups of friends would come in together.. I've also heard of men hiring escorts for their son. Hell, we're in a forum where a bunch of men discuss hiring escorts and review them. There isn't an equivalent of that for women, and if you look for male escorts who only cater to women you might find one or two in Montreal and that's it. That's because there is no demand for it, and the way it's being presented isn't appealing to us. The escort services we were talking about for women in Asia are very heavily oriented towards romance and fulfilling a very different type of fantasy..

Of course, we can all criticize this. I'm sure a lot of women could benefit from hiring a SP, male or not. A lot more women than we'd think enjoy casual sex.. And a lot of men do need romance and tenderness when they seek these types of services, which isn't something that is often highlighted here, because the goal is to appear ''cool'' to other men and avoid being called a simp or whatever which seems almost the equivalent of calling another man ''gay''.. (chatgpt, am I gay because I gave a hug to the escort I hired and asked her questions about her favorite music? lol)

I was also thinking about this phenomenon of older women doing sex tourism in other countries and hiring men for a couple weeks to spend time with them..

I would recommend people interested in the topic to read this book Le Principe du cumshot
The book's name is kind of a click bait but it emphasizes on the myths and stereotypes around sexuality and how women sexuality is sort of discriminated.

I have the book in hands for those interested