Sex Worker's Security...

[naughtylady]

And Ronnie, maybe that says it all. Understanding the realities of the profession is the first step. Though I am convinced there can be improvements. Maybe it just requires the will to take it to the next level. Who knows.

Oh there is definitely room for improvement... a lot of room.

Ronnie,
Naughtylady

 

[Kepler]

A variation on the '90% of escorts are drug users' thesis?

Not at all. But even though the examples I gave may be rare events, they could still be cause for concern for some clients.

Of course every person, whatever their job, sets the working conditions they're willing to accept.

I'm just trying to explore ideas, to see if there's a way for a client to be anonymous and an SP to feel safe. How about meeting a client in the lobby of a reputable hotel first, and only proceeding after some conversation?

This way the SP can screen the client "live", and have the security of being in a public place. Any other ideas and safeguards are welcome.

 

[Miss Cloe]

Maybe but...

I'm just trying to explore ideas, to see if there's a way for a client to be anonymous and an SP to feel safe. How about meeting a client in the lobby of a reputable hotel first, and only proceeding after some conversation?

This way the SP can screen the client "live", and have the security of being in a public place. Any other ideas and safeguards are welcome.

This suggestion might be acceptable to some SPs but let me ask you;
How do we (SPs) confirm you (Gentlemen) are really staying at that hotel (to insure that it's actually a real rendez-vous and not just some guy wasting the Sp's time and having fun by setting up false/fake rendez-vous) without a real name?... Most reputable hotels will not transfer the SP's call to a room without a last name either!

I could end up meeting with Casper the ghost for all I know!

 

[Regular Guy]

Use the carrot not the stick

This suggestion might be acceptable to some SPs but let me ask you;
How do we (SPs) confirm you (Gentlemen) are really staying at that hotel (to insure that it's actually a real rendez-vous and not just some guy wasting the Sp's time and having fun by setting up false/fake rendez-vous) without a real name?... Most reputable hotels will not transfer the SP's call to a room without a last name either!

I could end up meeting with Casper the ghost for all I know!

Cloe,
It may be true that some escorts get stiffed from time to time. But I think the real concern here is for the girls' safety. I would bet real money that escorts would feel a lot better going to a date if they knew that when the door opened, the guy on the other side was a known quantity and better yet, one with a proven track record. All the discussion here is about working towards that end. As I said earlier, not all guys feel secure risking their reputations, marriages etc. to an sp or agency who smiles and says, "Trust me!" But as with all things in life using the carrot works better than using a stick. If you want to keep records or even have a valid system of identification then the best you can do is make an offer so attractive, the guys will want to become part of it. Market it. Offer incentives. Do whatever it takes. Who will go for it? Well guys who in the final analysis really have little or nothing to lose. They might be single and in a line of work where a revelation would not affect their lives to any great extent. Take it a step further. Wouldn't a lot of guys be envious of this little group and want to get in on this little closed community - maybe to trust a bit more and take the plunge - maybe enjoy the perks? You never know. It's a ploy used in marketing. Make the customer part of an exclusive group, include some perks and it gives him a sense of community. John at Eleganza figured that one out early with a members area and Chris of Devilish is using that idea very effectively with his members area. Granted they are using this for strictly marketing purposes but the general idea has merit here as well.
But are there any other advantages? Well there are spinoffs. Bad dates are not always due to the customer exclusively. Sometimes the chemistry is just bad. I recall one member here, for example who always makes it a point (as do I) to ask the escort if she is okay with him and to not be afraid to be truthful. I am sure there are some occasions where an escort might be happy with just the driver's fee and no repeat performances. Not to mention the client.
Now, all that said, would it work? I don't know. But what are we left with? Just look at this thread and see the impasse that is developing here. The clients are digging their heels in on the issue of confidentiality and the girls are insisting on identification for purposes of safety.
If anyone has a better idea, I'd like to hear it.

 

[gich]

L,un ou l,autre on a raison la meilleure solution selon moi c,est aux SP de faire du incall dans un hotel. Ou au clients s,ils ne sont pas à l,aise de dévoiler leur identité bien de boycotter
gich

 

[Kepler]

This suggestion might be acceptable to some SPs but let me ask you;

Safety wise, would it pass your test?

How do we (SPs) confirm you (Gentlemen) are really staying at that hotel (to insure that it's actually a real rendez-vous and not just some guy wasting the Sp's time

Ah. Now we're talking about business risk, which can be compensated by price. For example: assume 15% "no-shows", so raise your price for this type of encounter by 25% to compensate and provide a buffer. Premium service means premium rates, and no-shows become a cost of doing business.

 

[Miss Cloe]

Cloe,
It may be true that some escorts get stiffed from time to time. But I think the real concern here is for the girls' safety.

Of course safety is priority number one! I was only adding to the fact that without a real name, we are totally blind and vulnerable to those who have nothing better to do than to waste our time.

As I said earlier, not all guys feel secure risking their reputations, marriages etc. to an sp or agency who smiles and says, "Trust me!" But as with all things in life using the carrot works better than using a stick.

Same is true for the opposite side... Does an SP want to risk her safety and her life just because some guy, via email, said "Trust me, I'm a real nice gentleman!"?

If you want to keep records or even have a valid system of identification then the best you can do is make an offer so attractive, the guys will want to become part of it. Market it. Offer incentives.

So what you are saying is that if the SP in question offers real good incentives, the Gentleman in question will feel more confortable revealing his identity? With good incentives you're willing to risk a little more???
How does that help you protect your reputation, marriage and etc... more so then just revealing your identity to the SP for safety measures?

Take it a step further... Make the customer part of an exclusive group, include some perks and it gives him a sense of community. John at Eleganza figured that one out early with a members area and Chris of Devilish is using that idea very effectively with his members area. Granted they are using this for strictly marketing purposes but the general idea has merit here as well.

It's great for agencies and/or indies who have the free time to dedicate to this project.

 

[Miss Cloe]

Safety wise, would it pass your test?

lol Nice try Kepler!

Ah. Now we're talking about business risk, which can be compensated by price. For example: assume 15% "no-shows", so raise your price for this type of encounter by 25% to compensate and provide a buffer. Premium service means premium rates, and no-shows become a cost of doing business.

For the short period of time I have been a Companion, I have learned that not every business risk can be compensated by price! This is a very particular and unique business where standard guidelines cannot always be applied.

If you want to discuss financial business risk and various approaches to keeping cost at a low minimum, PM me...

 

[sexxxymtl]

Here's my take on the situation... I totally understand when a client does not want to give any personal information.... But if I had a call from someone and they are really being difficult with giving information that I state upfront that I need, (Name fake or not... I tell them, I would like to be able to call you by something when we hook up) then it doesn't matter how much he/she would be willing to pay me... I wont go.... Or if he starts talking really degrading to me, then yeah that's a no go.... I've had it to where some clients have tried asking me personal information, (beyond curiosity questions) and I'll just say straight up "Is that info really that important".... But I'll admit there are some clients that yes I will tell them info about myself but that's because we both know why we are both here, and this person has shown me total respect as a women.... When I do have a funny feeling on a call, I always make sure that I have a back up plan.... I'd rather pay someone to drive me to my calls and be safe (because I know he will protect me if anything goes bad) then to save money and have no protection... Plus I know where all my exit points are... Doors, windows, if I'm in a hotel something that I can damage in the hotel room to give me a few seconds escape time... But most importantly, I know my own limitations... I know what I can do and what I can't do.... And I don't push those boundaries because if something does go wrong then I'd be in lots of trouble....

 

[Regular Guy]

There are no easy solutions!

Of course safety is priority number one! I was only adding to the fact that without a real name, we are totally blind and vulnerable to those who have nothing better to do than to waste our time.

Well this thread is about safety. Perhaps you could cover the inconvenience of wasting your time in another thread.

Same is true for the opposite side... Does an SP want to risk her safety and her life just because some guy, via email, said "Trust me, I'm a real nice gentleman!"?

If you caught my drift in earlier posts I believe I was talking more about the “one strike and you're out” rule not first encounters. Spread the word fast on a bad client and he is back driving his car around looking for new friends. But, I suppose if you can convince the guys here to reveal identities on your terms and your terms alone, then hey! Problem solved right?

So what you are saying is that if the SP in question offers real good incentives, the Gentlemen in question will feel more confortable revealing his identity? With good incentives you're willing to risk a little more???
How does that help you protect your reputation, marriage and etc... more so then just revealing your identity to the SP for safety measures?

It's all about demonstrations of good will. It is all about at least attempting to build good will. But in the end only a true test will tell. But I will say this: It almost seems like you are taking the position that it's your way or the highway. If you think going head to head with clients to reveal their identities or it wont happen is going to get them to say, “Oh sure, Okay!” then I have a bridge I can sell you. Your high end clients would expect at the very least, a show of good faith. And even then there are no guarantees.

It's great for agencies and/or indies who have the free time to dedicate to this project.

If you have a workable plan let's hear it. But it seems that if you aren't prepared to put forth at least a little bit of effort to improve your work environment and make a show of good faith, then how important is this idea really to you?

 

[Regular Guy]

Is the solution out there?

RG,

I have not seen exclusive single men. In fact, I'd say a good 50% are married, as most indies/SPs probably would. How many of those work in an area where a revelation would affect their lives? Most. Who works anywhere where it wouldn't? Would I do such a thing? No. Why? Same reason I trust the person who trusts me: I'm not out to hurt them. Trust, like reputations, is earned. Perhaps the people who do not mind giving their real name only do it with people who do have good reputations? I don't know. I assume they research before they contact us. Are these people who have good jobs and families going to come forward and admit they don't mind giving out their name? Probably not. Am I going to name them? No. Not even their handle. The point is, it's a person's choice to give out their name or not. So to your question 'Who will go for it', you are mistaken to think the pool is so small. Indies haven't gone out of business. I guess that means there are enough people who are not worried about us disclosing their identity to go around. And they would be right.

JAG

Thank you for your insight. I suppose the point I am getting at is similar to where you say,

Trust, like reputations, is earned. Perhaps the people who do not mind giving their real name only do it with people who do have good reputations? I don't know.

I think we all realized right from the start that trust is the supreme issue here. Not easy to earn that. There has to be a show of good faith on both sides. I am going to be honest here and say that I was putting a plan out there for arguments sake. I went out on a limb with what I believed your client base to be. But I still feel that a solution, or the beginnings of a solution might come out of the discussion on this thread. If my little effort helped in any way then it was not for nothing

 

[breadman]

The first meeting is in a motel room. Then if i meet the girl a second or third time its my house or i will call someone else. The girl and agency will know who i am and where i live so i will not do anything crazy

And if you have alot of nice things, the girl might tell some friends who might try to take them away from you. Then you walk in or wake up with 3 guys going thru your belongings...

 

[Regular Guy]

Room for Improvement

Here's my take on the situation... I totally understand when a client does not want to give any personal information.... But if I had a call from someone and they are really being difficult with giving information that I state upfront that I need, (Name fake or not... I tell them, I would like to be able to call you by something when we hook up) then it doesn't matter how much he/she would be willing to pay me... I wont go.... Or if he starts talking really degrading to me, then yeah that's a no go.... I've had it to where some clients have tried asking me personal information, (beyond curiosity questions) and I'll just say straight up "Is that info really that important".... But I'll admit there are some clients that yes I will tell them info about myself but that's because we both know why we are both here, and this person has shown me total respect as a women.... When I do have a funny feeling on a call, I always make sure that I have a back up plan.... I'd rather pay someone to drive me to my calls and be safe (because I know he will protect me if anything goes bad) then to save money and have no protection... Plus I know where all my exit points are... Doors, windows, if I'm in a hotel something that I can damage in the hotel room to give me a few seconds escape time... But most importantly, I know my own limitations... I know what I can do and what I can't do.... And I don't push those boundaries because if something does go wrong then I'd be in lots of trouble....

It just might be that when all the dust settles here, your answer is the only workable one. Hopefully, though there will be some initiatives that can be tried in the future that will improve the odds on escorts having to suffer through bad dates. As Ronnie said there is a lot of room for improvement.

 

[breadman]

OK, tell me what other options other than sex trade, I had when I first started.

I was very burnt out and depressed. My doctor did not see me as fit to work. I had walked out on a 15 year relationship when he became abusive. Employment insurance had run out and welfare refused me since the house was not sold and thus I had 2 residences (I was living in a woman's shelter)

I got fired from 4 jobs that year. It seems that being on the edge of tears or crying or being high strung and jumpy are not qualities bosses look for.

Back on employment insurance but this time for less months and less per pay period because I had less hours and a lower income. The last month of employment insurance is coming up fast and the house still is not sold. So welfare is still not an option.

Thankfully I am no longer in that situation and I have my health back. I stay in this occupation because for me the good out weighs the bad.

Abusive relationships are never going to stop. I'll never say that I have all the answers. But ive got to assume most of the women in these situations didnt turn to the sex trade...and then make the decision to stay.

The sex industry should never be one's main source of income, you should always have something else in the wings. I hope you have another job besides this one, your foolish if you don't. Making some extra money on the side is one thing, having to depend on this industry to pay all your bills is another. What I consider really sad is the escort who's got a college degree but hasn't put it to use by getting a regular job.

 

[Miss Cloe]

Well this thread is about safety. Perhaps you could cover the inconvenience of wasting your time in another thread.

Thank you for the information sir.
Again, I was only trying to point out that a real name is important for many reasons and the first one being safety!

If you caught my drift in earlier posts I believe I was talking more about the “one strike and you're out” rule not first encounters.

I'm sorry. I must have missed your "drift" about the "one strike and you're out" type of deal!
So what is your suggestion for first encounters? Someone contacts an SP via email and she is expected to show up at a specific location and time and meet "John xxx"?

Spread the word fast on a bad client and he is back driving his car around looking for new friends.

Spread the word on who? John xxx, John yyy, John zzz?
Today's "John" could easily be "Mike" the next day if he wants too! After all, it's only a fake name!... Other email accounts can also be easily created which each new identities!

But, I suppose if you can convince the guys here to reveal identities on your terms and your terms alone, then hey! Problem solved right?

Sir, I, personally, do not need to convince anyone to reveal their identities. They choose to do so or not... It is part of my screening process before accepting or declining a rendez-vous!!! Every SP has a right to determine her own "work conditions". I choose safety first!

If you think going head to head with clients to reveal their identities or it wont happen is going to get them to say, “Oh sure, Okay!” then I have a bridge I can sell you.

I don't have to go "head to head" with Gentlemen in order to them to reveal their identity. I simply mention the fact, in the first email contact, that in order to schedule a rendez-vous with me, certain conditions apply! Then, it is up to them to decide what they would like to do.

If you have a workable plan let's hear it. But it seems that if you aren't prepared to put forth at least a little bit of effort to improve your work environment and make a show of good faith, then how important is this idea really to you?

For your information, I invest a lot of time and effort to make sure I meet with Gentlemen in the safest way possible... That's why I have a screening process and ask for a real full name!

Anyway, this thread is about the safety of ALL SPs... Not just mine!

 

[voyageur11]

And if you have alot of nice things, the girl might tell some friends who might try to take them away from you. Then you walk in or wake up with 3 guys going thru your belongings...

I have been doing for yearnever had any problem How many people got rob in their hotel room? You live in fear i dont

 

[breadman]

I have been doing for yearnever had any problem How many people got rob in their hotel room? You live in fear i dont

Living in fear...yep, that's me to a T . How'd you know it was me O.J. came after? I swear I bought all that stuff legit

Its the issue of bringing strangers into your home, eventually you'll run across someone who has something other than good intentions or looking for a little extra. You've been lucky with those two conjoined escorts you've been seeing over the last year, try a single escort for a change and see what happens.

 

[voyageur11]

Living in fear...yep, that's me to a T . How'd you know it was me O.J. came after? I swear I bought all that stuff legit

Its the issue of bringing strangers into your home, eventually you'll run across someone who has something other than good intentions or looking for a little extra. You've been lucky with those two conjoined escorts you've been seeing over the last year, try a single escort for a change and see what happens.

I did 2 week ago . I got money stolen from me once a long time ago in a motel room. should i stop going to motel?Should i stop walking my dog at night a drunk driver might hit me. You do what you think is right for you and i will take care of myself

 

[naughtylady]

And if you have alot of nice things, the girl might tell some friends who might try to take them away from you. Then you walk in or wake up with 3 guys going thru your belongings...

Are there many stories of indies or agencies doing this? I have heard of many Street girls with wandering fingers but those of us who already have an established reputation?

Ronnie,
Naughtylady

 

[naughtylady]

Abusive relationships are never going to stop. I'll never say that I have all the answers. But ive got to assume most of the women in these situations didnt turn to the sex trade...and then make the decision to stay.

The sex industry should never be one's main source of income, you should always have something else in the wings. I hope you have another job besides this one, your foolish if you don't. Making some extra money on the side is one thing, having to depend on this industry to pay all your bills is another. What I consider really sad is the escort who's got a college degree but hasn't put it to use by getting a regular job.

It wasn't the abusive situation (I walked away from that!) that turned me out. It was my being unfit to work and being refused by welfare.

Ronnie,
Naughtylady