Something that we should all know !

[Doggyluver]

This past year I was looking at the ads in annonces123 and came across an ad for a young woman and although pictures are more often than not fake, I decided to give her a try. She was as the pictures claimed, young, pretty and in great shape. The rates were right and the service was excellent and although I had paid her for an hour we began to talk afterwards and she told me that she found me to be very nice and would like me to sit and talk if I had the time. I told her that since I'm not in a rush it would be my pleasure. We got talking about her life and mine. It turns out she lost her virginity at the age of 7 ! When she told me that she was in tears and my heart was breaking and since that day I have been unable to think of anything but this young woman ever since. She told me her mother was a prostitute and that from the age of 3 she was bringing her into the bed with her clients to suck their cocks. Finally she encouraged a client to have sex with her when she was 7 and when her sister found out what had happened she called child protective service and she, her older sister and her brother were removed from the home and placed in foster care. She had been in the system until the age of 18 when the CPS says goodbye and with no training or money make your way in the world. Needless to say had I known this prior to having sex with her I would not have done so and that being said I have tried unsuccessfully so far to help her get some help to get out of this life. I will continue to help her as much as I can and hope one day that she will get a job, return to school and learn a skill that will enable her to have pride in what she does.

The only reason I put this thread up was to let you all know that far too often we see these women and take for granted that they are in this life because they enjoy it. Sometimes the path to servicing us is a difficult one and we should at the very least know and understand and yes have a little empathy for those who are there because this is all they know or that they have been forced into the life.

I have never written a review for this girl because of her situation and will not provide any information here or via PM so don't bother asking. I needed to share this and take a little weight off my shoulders.

 

[perfectgent813431]

God bless you DoggyLuver. I have had similar experiences. Many providers have painful pasts. Sometimes a client who truly listens is the only person they feel they can talk to about such things. If you are the type client who tries to have a human connection with a provider, you are more likely to have them open up to you in such a way. You can only listen, treat them with respect and offer help if you can....and pray if you believe in prayer.

 

[rwilson]

That's a devastating story, but i am glad you shared it. It is hard to remember sometimes that even though these women may be gorgeous and we obviously want to be with them, their own private lives could be quite messy (just like anyone elses). I love this board, and the guys who post reviews seem great. Maybe we should move the reviews away from a list of abbreviations of what the girls are willing to do and not do. Some of the women may be fine with that type of review abotu them, but some may not, and I think we should just try to respect them as much as possible.

Maybe we can just skip the 'bbbj/cim' in the reviews, I think it demeans the women. I realize that I am being hypocritical in some way, but if we are going to hobby let's at least respect and treat these women great. I hope the women do not have horrible stories like the one described here, but either way, we should do our part to make sure they feel respected and adored, not just adored only.

well done doggyluver, it sounds like you did all the right things.

 

[Sol Tee Nutz]

^^^^^^ Glad you replied with quote, forgot what thread we were in.
I posted a couple of years ago about a SP I met in Ft.McMurray from Quebec, same kind of story, glad she got home ok.

 

[anon_vlad]

Most escorts are attractive enough to walk into any bar anywhere in the world and walk out with a young, handsome man in a few minutes, so they don't take the job because they need more sex.

I remember first being amazed when finding out that some SPs I was seeing came from upper middle class families, had not been abused, weren't gerontophiles and had reasonably well paying jobs. They explained that they worked as escorts to have enough money for luxuries such as designer clothes and trips. A couple wanted to obtain funds as quickly as possible to establish businesses. Do the affluent women I met have a "better" motive to work as escorts than the one whom Doggy described?

Should one bycott abused and/or desperate women? I don't have the means to "save" all of them.

Should one refuse women who don't "need" the money? In my opinion, people who are addicted to high end designer goods are not much different than drug addicts, the latter whom many on this site said they would bycott.

Should we only hire someone who loves her work and could do something else to make as much? Should we only see those whose motives for working as escorts is acceptable to us?

 

[rwilson]

The fact that you view a statement that asks people to behave respectfully as 'virtue signaling' is your problem. You can disagree with the 'no acronym' idea, that's fine. But it's the way I feel, I think it's better for everyone.

 

[No_Church_InThe_Wild]

Always a pleasure reading you Sam21
Well said indeed

 

[CaptRenault]

...I have tried unsuccessfully so far to help her get some help to get out of this life. I will continue to help her as much as I can...

Do you give her money besides what you pay her for sex? If so, how much?

 

[hungry101]

I question the veracity of her story. If it is true, why tell you this the first time you meet? I tend to keep my fucked up relations to myself and I don't dump my bucket of problems on strangers that I do business with or girls I would like to date during the first meeting...or the second or third. Try dating later in life. Hell, everyone has baggage. We don't share our psycho ex-wife stories or the fact we have a teenager hooked on opiates during the first meeting (if we want a second meeting to happen). So why did she tell you this? Are you sure that she is not trying to manipulate you in some way? It seems to have worked.

You want to help her? Do you have a time machine like Napoleon Dynamite's uncle Rico so you can get her out of that house before she is forced into sex at age 7? The damage is done. And who says you need to save her from this life? Again, you probably need the time machine so that you can get to her early enough in her education so that you can insist that she is enrolled in the STEM curriculum etc. The fact that she was abused and the fact that she is now an escort are two different things. It sounds to me like she is an adult and being an SP is what she knows and this is what she chooses to do. Again, I think that you are about 10-15 years too late.

I am puzzled by Mr. Wilson's suggestion that we should no longer describe services during reviews. That is a absurd suggestion and has no bearing on this girl or any girl that has a problem like this. This is a review board where we review the girls that we see in order to help other members select future girls to see. Maybe every 4th girl we see we should show up and just give them 200$ and say good day? We would all be good guys if we did this.

Assuming that she is telling you the truth about the abuse, I would venture to guess that this girl is the exception and not the rule. This reminds me of the abolitionists that shut down TER and BP because of under-aged girls and trafficked girls. Like Doggie, I know many girls and I keep in touch with a few of the indies. I got to know a few agency girls as well. Funny, none have told me a story like this. When they confided in me about the motivation to do this job I would say it is more about what I call lifestyle creep. Follow the Montreal girls on Twitter. They are traveling all over the place, shopping, drinking fine wines, eating gourmet cuisine, staying in 5-star hotels and doing this all on their own volition. I don't know a one that is trafficked or under-aged for that matter. One Indy I know was doing this for kicks and she had a professional position the entire time. Another Indy I know worked seasonally outside of Montreal at a non-SP job. She spends a lot of money and probably needs to cut up her credit cards so she does this to make ends meet. I met another Indy that was just doing this through grad school. She told me that because of her religion and her parents she would have to eventually quit and get married which I believe that she did. One former agency girl was working at a fast food restaurant and she told me her motivation was as follows: "I was sick and tired of this shitty life with nothing." Etc. etc. I didn't have any sodium pentathol so I have to take their word for it just like you with the abused girl.

 

[protagoras]

I question the veracity of her story. If it is true, why tell you this the first time you meet? .

There's is a very popular acronym which is used in the lingo of puteiros in Brazil : PPP. It stands for Papo Padrão Puta. Here is a tentative translation : standard hooker's chat.

Is it a genuine case of PPP? To be honest (and fair) important elements are missing to judge the veracity of her alleged confession. It looks more like a sub-standard hooker's chat but it is possible afterall. To be honest and following the so-called "principle of charity" I'm inclined to trust Doggyluver's judgment of veracity. He is a seasoned merbite and I assume that he is experienced, not gullyble, and that he knows very well the tacit "rules" of the game.

I've heard similar stories in the past. Not a lot, but maybe two or three. I've worked more than 30 years as a psychotherapist and I can easily discern if people are telling the truth or if they are lying. On the other hand I know how to make people confident and squeeze the facts out of them (or "leur tirer les vers du nez" as we say in French).

The problem with escorts or SW in general is that you have to be extra vigilant. In general the girls that are lifestyle creeps (dixit Hungry) don't stay long in the bizz. Habitually they have short terms objectives. I'm not interested in those who are life style creeps as you define them : traveling a lot, shopping, drinking expensive wines, etc. For me they are futile and insignifiant (according to my personal values)....they are like the girls that were caught in Australia trying to smuggle cocaine. Their only motivation was (propably) doing easy cash.

Im my youth I had several girlfriend that were strippers and I always keep in mind what one of them - an Haïtian one with basic scolarity- told me : "I do that degrading job because I need the money to raise my kids properly. I don't understand the strippers with no kids that are doing this job". It is hard to generalize (and too easy to condemn). We never know with certainty what are the real motivation of the SW and maybe it is not of our business afterall. But a thing is sure : when a SW talks to me I always keep in mind (and try to decode) that there is always a PPP lurking somewhere....

 

[CaptRenault]

I question the veracity of her story. If it is true, why tell you this the first time you meet? ...So why did she tell you this? Are you sure that she is not trying to manipulate you in some way? It seems to have worked.

...I am puzzled by Mr. Wilson's suggestion that we should no longer describe services during reviews. That is a absurd suggestion and has no bearing on this girl or any girl that has a problem like this. This is a review board where we review the girls that we see in order to help other members select future girls to see. Maybe every 4th girl we see we should show up and just give them 200$ and say good day?

Assuming that she is telling you the truth about the abuse, I would venture to guess that this girl is the exception and not the rule. This reminds me of the abolitionists that shut down TER and BP because of under-aged girls and trafficked girls. Like Doggie, I know many girls and I keep in touch with a few of the indies. I got to know a few agency girls as well. Funny, none have told me a story like this...

I agree with all of Hungry's points about this story. It sounds like the girl is telling a (really BIG) sob story to get sympathy and extra money from clients.

 

[hungry101]

I'm inclined to trust Doggyluver's judgment of veracity. He is a seasoned merbite and I assume that he is experienced, not gullyble, and that he knows very well the tacit "rules" of the game.

But a thing is sure : when a SW talks to me I always keep in mind (and try to decode) that there is always a PPP lurking somewhere....

I agree. I've been reading DL's posts for a long time. I don't think he is a gullible fool either. Maybe she is telling the truth but that is not the issue. DL can't see the forest for the trees and maybe he has become emotionally attached which is easy to do..because it is hard not to become emotionally attached after a good orgasm with a cute girl who is also trying to garner your affection.

Did you ever watch an old Hollywood movie and someone is acting panicked and crying hysterically in the face of a crisis...typically it's a women? What does Humphrey Bogart do? He grabs her shakes her and slaps her in the face. Then he talks sense to her so that they can face the crisis. That is what I am doing to DL right now. There is nothing he can do. She's gone. DL can't see the forest because he's in the trees.

Or another analogy. Remember the movie the Green Beret? After an incoming mortar round you see a pair of smoking boots where SGT _____ was standing? And the reporter named George Beckworth played by David Jansen says "Where is SGT ___?" The answer is "He's gone" and the guy grabs the reporter and they jump in a trench before the next round strikes. DL is George Beckworth and I'm trying to be that guy that grabs his arm and pulls him into the trench before he also becomes a casualty of war.

 

[hungry101]

Yep Sam. It's a job. In Montreal, you make your own schedule to a degree. You have flexible days. It's a cash business so you report the income that you want. You get paid upon completion of the job and I bet these girls have less problems collecting money than many other professions who try to collect months after a job is done. I have not heard of one john declaring bankruptcy at the end of a session and not paying the girls. You can make your own hours, be your own boss. Life is good but you gotta have an exit plan...or you don't. You can be like many girls I see that are semi retired and and work sparingly because they like the money and they like the thrill it provides. Like one girl told me laying in bed next to me "I need this" and she motioned by opening both hands and holding them at the waist in a gesture. She liked the affection and all the accouterments that come with it.

Your job is to find those girls.

 

[Doggyluver]

OK, believe me or don't ! Believe her or don't ! None of the doubts mean anything to me. The only reason I shared this was because it was bothering me to keep it to myself. I have heard BS stories from other SP's and listened and walked away. In this case I believe her and that's all that's important. Save her from this life, probably not but I'll do what I can. I shared this to get it off my chest, now I won't comment again.

 

[hungry101]

DL - If what she says is true she was abused. What I did not glean from your posts was that she wanted to get out of sex work. You just said that she has some repulsive memories and was removed from the home because of abuse. She is no longer abused, correct? She chose to become a sex worker. Is she repulsed by sex work? There was a bit of a disconnect in your post. Does she hate her job? If so, what else is she trained to do?

Problem is, that she has to earn a living. People that have two parents that are educators and just spent the last 12 years in public school, often make the decision to become educators themselves. People from families that have parents that are physician tend to become physicians. You do what you know. They spent a good part of their early lives with this goal in mind. Their parents probably had this goal for their children when they were in the womb. With this girls upbringing, I would guess that she may not have excelled in prep school. Her opportunities are probably limited at this point. The question is, how can you help her? She can take a cut in pay and get up in the morning and work at Tim Horton's?

Here's the problem: You don't wake up one morning and say I want to become a brain surgeon. I hope it is not too late to find a technical skill that is in demand so that she can do something else. Maybe she can dabble in sex work from time to time to make ends meet or to afford a few luxuries. Maybe she can find a sugar daddy but even this is short term. She needs to learn how to fish so she can eat for a lifetime as the old saying goes.

Good luck.