The red pill men going their own way (what is it and what its not)

[vanhamm]

It’s the poutine. There is something in the poutine.

Poutine makes you fat but still we do live in the woke society and fat acceptance and fat shaming are good and bad... i will have mine with double cheese but hold the gravy

 

[vanhamm]

I am kind of surprised we really need either the Red or the Blue pill for this.

1. Western Civilization has changed drastically with respect to women in the last few decades. They are encouraged to obtain much greater education and skills than ever before, and Western Civilization has transformed into an information society and reaps its greatest economic rewards to the educated and skilled. Few if any women need to marry for money.

2. The greater education and learning of skills takes many years of effort. It reduces the time available for dating among those obtaining those things. Mobility is often required, especially among those from rural areas. The female of the species peaks in looks in the eyes of the males of the species during her teens, twenties, and for some into her thirties. The Western diet tends to cause weight gain, which tends to decrease the period of peak looks for the female. The same likely occurs among males, but female attraction for male looks is less relevant to her, and more fickle. It changes based on trends displayed on television and glossy magazines with no intellectually stimulating content.

3. Religious following declines as education increases. Fewer female children sing songs about the Male being The Leader. Atheists ironically say Thank God for this, even if it causes the male ones to have less sex. Fewer fundamentalist Christians come to the door to discuss The Second Coming. Some trade-offs are worth it.

4. As a result of numbers 1, 2 and 3, above, dating and marriage decline in Western Civilization. There are simply a lot more singles. Many males, who were previously the greatest beneficiaries of the old system, do not react well. Many Older males, rather than studying societal trends, give their opinions of how younger males should nab these largely mythical females supposedly waiting around for a date. In my opinion, they should have a big cup of shut the fuck up. A very large percentage of men, likely 70 to 80 percent, chase the exact same percentage of the most desirable females (which consist of about 20-30 percent of the total female population. From a practical perspective, extremely few of those younger females want a relationship with an older male, regardless of the attractiveness of the older male vis-a-vis any other male or female.

5. A certain percentage of the females from the portion of the female population that is most desirable to males of all ages will sell tail. This can range from one-hour at the hotel, to quasi-relationships via Seeking Arrangement, to marrying a much older, wealthy man and proclaiming that they are In Love. Fewer of them do any of those things every year, so the price has gone way up. And the greater economic success of females in Western Civilization, while increasing the Economic Pie, has reduced the relative incomes and wealth of men compared to women. Most guys don’t have enough money to buy as much pussy as they want, and a not insignificant number do not have enough money to buy any pussy at all. You have to couple this with society’s disapproval of commercial sex, and the desire of those who disapprove for more relationships and marriages to occur where the physical attractiveness of the female in the eyes of the male is not a factor. This goes well beyond the religious in society and gets a lot of Left-Wing Planners in addition to Right-Wing Planners.

6. The problems, at least as the male wanting to fuck attractive females would define the problems, are lessened for the male when a relatively greater number of economically disadvantaged females are present. Hence the mention of Western Civilization males pursing relationships with women from the Third World and Eastern Civilization, particularly those women who have the biggest possible detriment to economic prosperity - a baby or babies. The same principles certainly exist in Western Civilization - ladies from rural Quebec villages sell tail for a much lower price than a comparable female in New York City. But for the average older fellow with limited funds, nothing produces more sexual benefits than pursuing Third World Women. What is rarely discussed is what you give up. For many making Road Trips, very little is sacrificed. If you are talking about actually moving to the Philippines, that is a different story. What is the original poster going to do about those four cats if they outlive his mom? Do they make the long journey to the Philippines, too? Do you marry the single mom from the Philippines and live happily ever after with the elderly cats, the crying baby or babies, and the poor woman who might have been raised as a Christian and sings songs about Jesus the way poor uneducated women did in rural America in the 1950s? If that makes everyone happy, it is certainly fine with me.

7. Personally, I think that younger females are on balance happier than they were decades ago, and a lot of that increased happiness has come at the expense of males. That is the comment that gets me criticized when ai make it. But it isn’t a Men Going Their Own Way call to action, it is just a simple opinion based on the facts as I see them. Happiness is limited and people will compete against each other for the limited piece of the Happiness Pie. The Happiness Pie is even more of a bitch to make bigger as a whole than the Economic Pie, which supposedly can be made bigger through innovation and efficiency (although not as easily as a Republican politicians claim). You always have to evaluate how much increasing your own happiness comes at the expense of decreasing someone else’s happiness, just as the same as how big of a piece of the Economic Pie you get. And the principles of Socialism are at play with both. The person who thinks everyone should get the same-sized slice of Economic Pie rarely approves of sex work, or the marriage of a poor younger woman to a wealthier older man, no matter how economically efficient that might be.

Great analysis i do predict that in 20 years relationships between men and women won't exist anymore and that pretty much everyone will remain single.

Relationships lasting anywhere from 6 months to a few years and then both parties move on. Society is at its ultimate downfall right now, if you live here in Montreal you can clearly see it too.

I must have trained 5 or 6 new young men in the last 2 years at my job, all i can say is that they are all lazy they want big money but there social lives take front row, and everything else if there is time work.

The last guy i train was 23 years old, first came to the job with is cell and was watching series while i was training him, we work night time, i had to wake him up a few times during the night, i follow the production for a big company in Montreal we need to make sure that the production starts, does not get stuck during the night and finishes in the morning according to set times. The young men fell asleep in crucial times and miss important actions he had to do. I told my boss that he was not fit for the job but he would not care, with the lack of employee right now we have no choice he said.

The schedule is simple its 12 hours shifts, 4 nights, then you get 3 days off, 2 night on 3 days off, then 3 nights on including weekends and we have a 7 days off. The base salary is 50k working night time we have no boss around us and have access to internet so to be honest its a god damn dream job.

On is first 4 nights he called in sick 2 nights, then i had vacation time he went to the gym and blew is back so my boss made me come in 4 nights during my vacation. Not long after he quit the job and was wondering how he would make payments on is car. This is sadly 80% of the new generation of so called kids we have to deal with today.

The older guys like me being 50 need to come in to replace the younger generation that does not want to work, or call in sick to go out with their friends and enjoy life.

This is a far cry of what we used to be when younger i remember the year 1999 before the Y2K that year i worked more than 80 hours per week and made lots of money, today most young men are lazy.

There goes the need for immigration since lots of immigrant are ready to do the jobs that the spoiled brat we have here won't do.

I left home at 24 after i first started to work in IT, today my co workers who have kids don't leave home, and the worst they don't pay pension, some of them are closing in on 30.

Yes the world right now is a total mess.

 

[minutemenX]

My controversial 2 cents. The only purpose of the marriage is raising kids. Very few lucky marriages stay satisfying when kids became adults. There is nothing to mitigate inevitable tragedy of your death except of the knowledge that you will continue to leave in the memory of your kids and grandkids. Besides this you will leave no traces of your existence on this planet if you are not a super talented scientist or artist. Some believe that the memory of extensive sex life will provide some soothing at your older age. It’s a mistake. Remembering sex moments is a sexual activity itself, and with your libido approaching zero, your older self will not understand your own desire that was driving younger you to spend substantial amounts of money and time with strangers that will not even remember your name. Looking for a permanent partner just for sex at older age looks also irrational to me. Thus, I consider “hobbing” as a necessary activity like an exercise or medicine that prolongs physical and mental health if taken in minimal dosages.

 

[vanhamm]

But if an older guy spends money having sex with a much younger woman and she uses those funds to better herself or her children, isn’t that more beneficial to society than if he hoarded the money? In Thailand, the rich expatriate who marries the much younger lady (usually a single mom) is said to marry the entire family and is treated quite well (as long as the money lasts). I think there was a U.S. politician who said It Takes a Village. I guess those guys join The Village, at least in Thailand.

And there lies the problem, no decision left unturned, about a year and a half ago i decided it might be a good idea to retire overseas, like i said The philippines was my place of choice, i spoke to many expats, who live down there, some who came back and some who lost everything.

There is a women who organise meet ups with young Filipina, i contacted her at some point to get information, she did not bullshit me she told me that truth most of them come from poor families want to marry and have a man take care of them they also want a family. Even if she does not have any kids she wants some, so if retiring overseas at 60 and having kids at around 63 is your bag. The other thing is true as well. Most Filipina have kids and they have them young and its not only one kid sometimes they have 3 or 4. But be sure that lots of men that go there are white knights and coming to the rescue to take all that burden on themselves.

So you retire in what would be a paradis with amazing beaches low cost of living (this is to be debated in a few years) to do what spend your last living years on earth taking care of kids that are not yours, add to this family values so you will eventually send money to her family and not just the immediate family but also cousins etc.
This is another hard truth but for people like that you are like a millionaire with never ending ressource.

The last expat i spoke to was lucky enough to find the money to go back to is home country, he was not to bright 58 bald skinny fat and pretty much had nothing going for him he told me that upon his arrival in the airport he met his future wife to be she was 19. The guy was living off is pension he had nothing more, but yet still built a house for her parents that they all lived in but since the expense were far more than is pension he went bankrupt and it didn't take time for her to dump him and keep the house because in the Philippines you cannot own land.

The thrust is dangerous at all age. It is true that there are huge developpements in the PH, if you are rich you can live in Makati but you need to be a millionaire and more, forget about living there with a Canadian pension. If not you can always find a place in Manila or Cebu but the pollution there is insane and good luck with the driving.

Yes there are luxury condo's by the beach but most of the time they are right next to the slums. There are also very dangerous animals there, so you can go hiking in the mountains or on a trail and get bitten by a cobra snake, go in the sea and jelly fish, poison squid and a load of dangerous sea creatures.

 

[vanhamm]

Most of life, particularly relationships, is simply misery. There is really nothing wrong with just enjoying your old age and spending the wealth down by seeing sex workers and not pursuing relationships, even with women in extreme poverty. Most everything in life is ultimately transactional. A portion of the amount you spend will go to supporting their dependents and themselves even if a steady stream of them dress and leave afterward.

I think that is the point of the academic, researcher and writer Bella DePaulo makes in her publications. Single people, even those who have never been married and have no children, still matter. They produce and they spend. A lot of the structures of society are designed to act like those people do not matter.

Its an honor to finally read some sense, yes i agree 100% with you, for the Philippines yes this might seem weird, but this is their culture, more in the province than big cities the mentally is changing but over there kids take care of their parents that is the way it is, they work either on farms agriculture, or helpdesk city jobs, and send all the money home. So having kids there is more a matter of making money.

To think that most single women here are landwhales obese lose their looks before 30 and spend lots of money trying to hold on to the least they have surgeries botox etc, having a huge delusion on what they can actually get as a life partner, its normal that men who don't fit their profile or simply get tired of chasing damage goods after all if you are a man who as values dating a fat women who brings only kids a low end salary, and problems in your life is a serious no no, but still you get the blue pill white knights ready to jump in and save the day no fat shaming those women are beautiful and they end up getting screwed anyways for being the good guys.

Why stay here and date ugly when you can go over there and have amazingly younger and hotter women that are ready to commit in relationships, of course don't kid yourself it's an exchange too her beauty for your money but if you can afford it, and Asian women age amazingly well compared to the western junk food smoking women.

So i guess if a person is still interested in a relationship and ready to pay the price Asian country is the place to go

 

[vanhamm]

The main issue is that men cannot handle the truth its too hard. I used to post on sosuave a pua site with some MGTOW content. I had a good following on there until i just gave up.

Most men went on dates then they came posting that the women never texted back, was not replying to there text, etc.

I kept telling them that if a women does not have 30 seconds in her day to reply to you or show you a sign of life she is not interested. I know it sucks but its life. And men used to get so mad at me because the truth hurt. Somewhere arguing with me, maybe she was busy with her kids, maybe her phone broke, and all sorts of unimaginable reasons except facing the truth. You met her she did not like you and its over. So men even met the girl once, she was special she was the one.

I get it i was born in 1972 and i was raise on social programming myself, that my goal in life was to find a good women marry and have kids and live happily ever after you know like all those amazing Walt Disney movies, but like the movies this was fiction and not reality. I too went on dates and texted women etc and never got a reply back.

There is a youtuber that post the truth is name is face and LMS this is cold hard facts about attraction and how LOOKS are everything and how dating is today, exposing the lies PUA tells there clients that looks only count for 33% etc.

Like i said i been on both side of the fence, with a beach body, when i went to club younger women actually grab my butt and i had tons of complements, up until later in life i gained weight chubby round face and all the attraction stop right there.

But most men can't handle the truth, they actually think that a way to a women heart is to shower her with compliments (like she never got them from other men and is tired of hearing how beautiful she is, how her eyes are sparkling like the sea, ) all the gifts that men give them.... and more. Don't fool yourself if you don't have the LOOKS you got nothing and even the below average ones are after this its there new standards of entitlement

 

[vanhamm]

This is good summary relating to the decline in marriage.

The end of marriage in America?

America’s marriage rate has unquestionably declined over the recent past and reached a historic low.

thehill.com

“Some of the major factors behind the long-term decline in the marriage rate have been female education and labor force participation, women’s economic independence and gender equality. America is also experiencing growing numbers of women and men living alone as well as increasing unmarried cohabitation.”

I like how he simply states the obvious. The change has mostly occurred as a result of the economic and societal successes of women.

Nothing wrong with that. In fact there may be everything right with that.

But the truth is the truth, and facts are facts.

Yes you need to face the truth, like i said things are not like that in poor country, in the Philippines they don't pay attention to looks unless you are stupid enough to bring her back in your home country where she is gonna meet better men then most expats. But in her country you will be her way out of poverty, why you think lots of young filipina hang out at the aeroport.

I met a few women since 2013 but they all wanted to live with me its sad because i really like the idea of you have your place i have mine. I have nothing against women who make it in life after all they studied hard put in the time they deserve the reward. Like the women at my job that i trained and they were holding on her salary raise, i fought for her at human resource because she well deserve the raise.

This is not my main issue with women, i guess once more i will refer to a place that is useless rock bottom but online dating, where most women there have 2 kids full time, and have dead-end job not even making 30k a year but have huge standards on the type of men they want when they have nothing to offer in return.

Theses are the same women that you talk to and they tell you either they want to get in a relationship because life is expansive and its better to be two to pay great reason to fall in love i guess or that before they got divorce or dumb there boyfriend tell you they had 2 beautiful kids, they were happy they traveled.. coming from a chubby fatty who at 41 was banging a 27y old guy and she actually thought it was going to become serious.

You see things like that discourage men like me who had good intention going online and many other men to pursue any kind of relationship with women

 

[Carmine Falcone]

There's far too much to cover in this thread, so I'm only hitting a few points.

* The dating market is indeed worse now and modern advances and internet have their parts to play in that. Once upon a time, people dated and married those closest to them. With better transportation means, your mate choices expanded. With dating sites where you seem to have even more partner choices, your options expanded even further. The appearance of limitless choices also made people more selective/choosy.

* The cellphone and constant looking down have changed people's social skills. I'm an extrovert and I remember being able to strike up conversations with people I didn't know in the past in public spaces easier than I do now. Now people make less eye contact and have Air Pods on.

* Unless you have offsetting characteristics like fame or enormous wealth, your mate choices diminish as you get older. It's just a fact of life. I know this hobby allows us to sleep with women in their twenties and thirties even though we're mostly in middle age and beyond (yay having more money as you age) but that dynamic isn't prevalent in the dating world. People mostly date people who are close to their own age.

* Good looks/body/abs etc are only important to women if their primary interest in you is physical and not much else.

I exercise vigorously 5x a week (cardio, weights etc). I didn't start that routine until my early 30s. As a middle aged man with abs, I can tell you it was far easier to meet women with no abs in my twenties and thirties than at 45 WITH abs! Part of me feels like I've done worse with women now because perhaps they assume an in-shape guy is a cad/player (in this particular case, they're not wrong haha. Why sleep with one woman when you can sleep with more?). Every woman that liked me after I got really in shape liked the connection we had first. Have I had interesting reactions from civilian women when we first see each other unclothed? Of course, but my physical appearance isn't what made them go out with me.

I exercise for my health and to feel better. Any physical appearance that comes with that is strictly icing on the cake. You should do it for that purpose too. But there are plenty of regular looking guys with women. Your lack of abs isn't what's holding you back. Women looking for long term relationships are judging the connection they have with you, your ability to provide and shared values. Of course, some physical attraction matters to both parties but we men are far more looks-focused than women are.

 

[parmenides]

Reading Schopenhauer's the World as Will and Representation has given me understanding and, in a way, happiness about all this. Perhaps it would help you out as well

 

[vanhamm]

I exercise vigorously 5x a week (cardio, weights etc). I didn't start that routine until my early 30s. As a middle aged man with abs, I can tell you it was far easier to meet women with no abs in my twenties and thirties than at 45 WITH abs! Part of me feels like I've done worse with women now because perhaps they assume an in-shape guy is a cad/player (in this particular case, they're not wrong haha. Why sleep with one woman when you can sleep with more?). Every woman that liked me after I got really in shape liked the connection we had first. Have I had interesting reactions from civilian women when we first see each other unclothed? Of course, but my physical appearance isn't what made them go out with me.

I exercise for my health and to feel better. Any physical appearance that comes with that is strictly icing on the cake. You should do it for that purpose too. But there are plenty of regular looking guys with women. Your lack of abs isn't what's holding you back. Women looking for long term relationships are judging the connection they have with you, your ability to provide and shared values. Of course, some physical attraction matters to both parties but we men are far more looks-focused than women are.

My journey into bodybuilding as been long started back in 1986 when i was 13 years old god bless my grandfather who bought me a weider bench press and weights, then in 1988 i joined my first gym, but injured myself in 2002 doing powerlifting and a stupid chiro made things worse.

Women and physical attraction. There are all kinds of women and there are younger women who are attracted to older men, i was 44 when i met this 23y old Hispanic waitress at belle et boeuf in Anjou, she was the one that came on to me ask me to slow dance with her, we hit it on for a few months but i called it quits when she wanted a family. At 47 when went to la cage at place Versaille where a 29 year old approach me outside open the door for me, and we hit if off for one night. She told me that she love the touch of an older man.

But on the other side you are right when i go to the grocery store or pharmacy some younger women will look at me like i am a pervert, the world is not the same, people have change as you say, they are more in there bubble, its like people don't look at each other anymore.

For online dating its a very bad place to meet, i chatted with a lot of women and only met a handful, every date i went on i was asking myself what the hell am i doing here, one brought her 2 kids along, another look dirty etc. And most of the time i got rejected while i had more luck with the younger women.

To be honest after being single for so long i am closing in on 10 years if you don't count the time i spend with the Hispanic girl, but it was mostly sex and dining out. I feel that now at 50 relationships bore me.

I am still training i need to be careful not to reinjure myself. After 37 years in the game i know when to push and when to take it easy, i built my home gym train 4 times per week around 30-40 minutes, i must admit i have a treadmill but stop using it. I use an upper body lower body split. I hit every muscle twice per week.

Recently changed my plan i still intermittent fast 14-16h but added more meals during the eating window and boosted protein intake, i guess i was fasting too much and was always tired.

 

[vanhamm]

Reading Schopenhauer's the World as Will and Representation has given me understanding and, in a way, happiness about all this. Perhaps it would help you out as well

thanks for the recommendation but like i said i read enough material, i am not unhappy in my life, i accept the fact that i was not able to find a women in which i could have picked up where i left my with ex girlfriend, travel, going out, hiking, restaurant but sadly i could not even find this.

Like i said the red pill made me understand what was going on, some MGTOW content, but now i stop reading and watching youtube videos i must admit there is a lot of useless women bashing in there. For me it was never about hate it was more about understanding why so many women who are below average have huge baggage kids full time and dead end jobs have such high standards in men. But to be honest i am over this too, i closed all my online dating accounts a very long time ago, and my last date which was a nightmare was more than 5 years ago.