Long term arrangements

[CaptRenault]

...I have acknowledged that there is a long history in western society of women choosing husbands based on his ability to support her, and of course, non-support has long been grounds for divorce.

...And as far as "paying" or providing support, or sharing the good fortune, if one in his later years wants the company of a younger woman, more likely than not, there's going to be a financial arrangement.

Actually women in all human societies choose husbands or long-term partners who can support them and their children well. Women will sometimes cheat on their actual or potential long-term partners and seek to get inseminated by a man who may have better DNA but fewer resources to support her. "Better" means better looking, stronger, healthier, etc. But the woman will stick with the guy that can best support her and her children as long as he treats her right.

The idea that women selflessly fall in love and stick with men no matter what long term support the man can offer is a peculiarly western idea. Most traditional societies don't buy into the idea of romance and love as the most important reasons to marry. Even in western societies we pretend marriage is all about love and romance and is not a fundamentally economic partnership. But when is the last time you saw a beautiful, sexy high-powered female lawyer marry a male bus driver? :lol:

Women are absolutely driven by their biological and psychological makeup to trade sex for resources ($); and men are driven to trade their resources ($) for sex. That doesn't mean that there's no such thing as romance or love. But if you view male female relationships through the prism of evolutionary biology/psychology, you will better understand relationships between the sexes.

 

[CaptRenault]

...women...really aren't that different than us...

Sam, I'm sure you don't really believe that. If you do, then one of these days you're in for a very rude awakening.

 

[EagerBeaver]

Anti-Prostitution Disclaimer

I believe this subject was raised by Patron earlier in the thread, but nobody posted SA’s specific anti-prostitution disclaimer. I have taken the liberty to copy and paste it:

“Disclaimer: An arrangement is not an escort service. SeekingArrangement in no way, shape or form supports escorts or prostitutes using our website for personal gain. Profiles suspect of this usage will be addressed by the SeekingArrangement Misconduct Team and banned from our website.”

Regarding the “SA Misconduct Team” and their mission: I wonder how many bans are actually given pursuant to this policy? The only way it could happen is if PMs are being read. But as already mentioned many times by Captain Renault and others, any financial arrangements involving intimacy should be discussed in person. On the other side for escorts who are using SA- I think you can push the envelope with sexy pics as long as they aren’t nudes, and the way to advertise is by using phraseology like “very open minded with the right guy”, etc. One lady whose profile greatly impressed me wrote, “adventurous in all aspects.” There are no laws against writing euphemistic platitudes that sound good but don’t say anything. It’s the overall message that tells the story and most guys and girls can figure it out depending which side they are on.

 

[EagerBeaver]

Have any of you guys ever been amused and/or impressed by a Sugar Baby's profile on SA, or what they have written in the "What I am Looking For" section of their profile? I came across a profile of a SB in Connecticut, a 26 year old Latina working as a nanny, which I found amusing. She talked about her fantasy of having a relationship like the one in the movie "Pretty Woman." I thought it was original and interesting. I have copied and pasted from her SA profile the passage quoted below:

"Looking to have my very own "Pretty Woman" story. I have always loved how that story played out and all the new life experiences she had that would have never happened to her if she had not taken a risk and got into that car. I am most fascinated how Edward Lewis(Richard Gere) did not judge her once or made her feel like a hooker rather respected her and embraced her while still teaching her so much. Like Vivian Ward(Julia Roberts) I want to meet someone as kind and knowledgable who will be fun and exciting. However i am still a girl and the scene on Rodeo Drive has always been a fantacy /dream because what girl will ever say no to feeling beautiful. Cautiously searching for my very own silver fox Edward Lewis!"


This is really good stuff.

 

[sambuca]

Sounds like EagerBeav has found his love connection.

Yes, it's very clever. Run, don't walk Eager!

 

[EagerBeaver]

I actually have some higher priority targets than her, but thought her profile was very clever. A lot of the ladies do not say a lot about themselves in their profiles, especially the really hot ones. That Latina is a bit below the top tier on SA but I would say she is top 30% looks wise on SA. I am more of a top 10-15% kind of guy.

 

[sambuca]

Without getting too personal, are you (have you) considering SA?

 

[EagerBeaver]

Sambuca,

You are late to this thread. I have been on SA as a paid member for 4 years (on and off) and have had around 10-15 arrangements - short and long term. This includes ladies in Connecticut, New York and Montreal.

 

[Sol Tee Nutz]

"Looking to have my very own "Pretty Woman" story.

Pretty sure Richard Greer had a lot to do with it.

 

[Sol Tee Nutz]

^^^^^ Personal tastes but I would not turn Julia Roberts away, even now. The SA girl is looking for a Richard Greer, Sam Elliot or George Clooney type to sweep her off her feet with money and love. Nice dream if it comes true.

 

[sambuca]

I second support for Julia. I actually love her smile.

 

[EagerBeaver]

Going back to the SA profile quoted I really don’t think her intention was to compare herself to Julia Roberts or state she was seeking someone with Richard Gere’s physical profile. I think her entire point was to indicate the value she sees in non-judgmental attitudes. This goes to one of my fundamental SA rules which is NEVER “hookerize” a lady. Too many guys new to SA think it’s an escort site and communicate right off the bat about sex. I think she had a creative way of preempting that.

 

[Sol Tee Nutz]

. This goes to one of my fundamental SA rules which is NEVER “hookerize” a lady.

She wants money for sex and companionship, what do you call it?

 

[EagerBeaver]

She wants money for sex and companionship, what do you call it?

Not a relevant question. The question is how you interact with her and using the correct words and tone so there is an understanding that she is a business partner in an arrangement. The ladies do not like being approached as if prostitutes. What we actually call the arrangement in private is totally irrelevant. It’s how you address her and if you proceed on the assumption that she is an escort and start discussions accordingly good luck getting message responses. I have said this at least 10 times in this thread.

 

[heliragedeleted]

She wants money for sex and companionship, what do you call it?

I don’t get it salty, you would outright say to a potential long term relationship with a sugar baby” hi you’re a hooker”? That would be suicidal no?

 

[jalimon]

She wants money for sex and companionship, what do you call it?

GFE

Cheers,

 

[anon_vlad]

She wants money for sex and companionship, what do you call it?

The word "hooker" or even "prostitute", evokes the image of a junkie, enslaved by a violent pimp, who hustles at street corners. The woman on Seeking Arrangement seek an arrangement with a single rich man (or a few). They think of themselves as waiting to become "Pretty Woman" (or the First Lady).

 

[EagerBeaver]

The biggest mistake guys make on Seeking Arrangement is to seek to meet at hotels or hotel restaurants. This instantly “hookerizes” an SA SB. A lot of them are open to pay for play arrangements but they want it in the context of dinner dates, meaning you take them to dinner, have a nice long leisurely meal, and then you taking her back to YOUR PLACE. Suggesting a hotel room denigrates her and says to her, “you are a common whore and are to be treated as such.” You treat her like a GF even if she isn’t and you only see her twice a month and have little contact with her between those meetings.

Girls like guys to invest some time in messaging them, getting to know them and getting to discuss and define an arrangement they will be comfortable with. And most want guys who take it slow for a couple dates and don’t have their foot on the gas pedal.

This should all be screamingly obvious common sense but surprisingly it’s not to a lot of people. Guys go on there with no patience and try to arrange one night stands and use language that signals that intention. These guys are losers in the game. The winners in the game play the fucking game. You either grab a glove and get in the game or don’t play. Hiring escorts is a relatively similar but simple transaction. Less patience and planning is required. SA is an interactive game which requires communication skills, patience, planning and discipline.

 

[anon_vlad]

I know a couple of escorts who have posted on Seeking Arrangement. Perhaps, they would not be offended by their first meeting in a hotel, but probably wouldn't mind a dinner date either. However, they are probably only a small minority on the website.

I agree with you, EB.

 

[Sol Tee Nutz]

SA is an interactive game which requires communication skills, patience, planning and discipline.

And money, can not forget the money. To see someone two or three times a month why play " the game ", call your favorite escort and you are set. I understand that many do enjoy the SA game but it is in the favor of the female, a little romance, dinner and then if accepted sex.