Bad Experience with Escort? Can you outdo my Top 5 Failed SP Encounters?

[TheDon]

As much as SPs would like their clients to be fresh and clean for their encounter the same goes for the SPs. If an SP take s a crap they sould wash out their ass so when they bend over for doggy you don't smell their crap. Also if a girl finished their period they should wash their pussies out so your cock don't get covered in days out clumpy blood.

Both of these I have experienced first hand and both were younger SPs.

 

[Merlot]

"If an SP take s a crap they sould wash out their ass ...you don't smell their crap. Also...their period they should wash their pussies out so your cock don't get covered in days out clumpy blood."

"Both of these I have experienced first hand and both were younger SPs."

YIIIIIIKES!!! I think we have our winner.

DAAAANNNMMM Bro! Since I started in this hobby I have never come close to anyone as bad as the indications in your post of the women you seem to have met. I did find a bloody tampon on the bathroom floor once, but never anything like your description on me. Either we aren't fishing the same ponds, or I'm just a lot luckier. Maybe you're just joking, but geeeezzuzzzzzzzzz!

I hope you are safe and well.

Happy endings,

Merlot

 

[hungry101]

Crappy date #2

We spent the rest of the hour talking about various things which i can't remember, and one thing i do remember is that my guest would have done herself a favor by investing on some perfume. Our clothes never came off (thankfully!), we never kissed, all we did was talk. I believe this is the only time this has ever happened in such a setting that i've been on. Paying for talk. LOL!!!

Did you end up paying this one? How about the girl that showed up and went to sleep? I think you paid for that one (If I remember correctly). Sorry, but I wouldn't of paid for either girl.

 

[hungry101]

I have more...

The first time I visited Sao Paulo was 2009. I was geeked because I heard about the vibrant hobby scene and I couldn't wait to meet a Brasilian GDP (Garota De Programa - girl with a program). I could not speak one word of Portuguese and I had no idea where to start. Sao Paulo (Sampa) is huge and intimidating. I tried to get a hold of Protagorus and I left him a few PM's but he was away from his computar for a few days. Anyway, I started calling agencies and freelance girls and no one could speak English. I found this impossible and I gave up.

The next day, after a 14 hour work day I decided go to the bar next door to the Hotel after a business dinner without first going back to my room to shower. I didn't venture too far away from the hotel because my company had me scared to death of Brazil. I later found this to be ridiculous. Anyway, this was my second night in Brazil and my second time in this bar. And like nearly all hotel bars in Brazil, It had a few GDPs in it. I saw a girl I would like to session with. Her name was Andrea. I sat down by her and started making small talk. She said that she gives private massage in the gentleman's room. In no time I bought her a drink, I paid her hotel parking, I agreed to her fee without dickering, and I said I will pay the visitor fee.

I brought her up to my room and I suggested we take a shower. She said that she didn't care to shower and I was fine like I was. We undressed and I asked her to keep her heels on for our session. she agreed to this. It was the only thing she agreed to and I think it was so she could get out the door faster. I paid her and then I dropped to my knees and I rubbed my cheeks against her creamy smooth legs. We moved to the bed and she said no kissing. I tried to go down on her and she said "Oh baby I don't like that." She got on me and we started fucking. She did reverse cowgirl probably so she didn't have to look at me. I was holding onto her spike heels and She was saying "Cum for me baby. I like it when a guy cums fast." About half way through the process I figured out that I had a dud. She was taking advantage of a newby Gringo that did not understand the Brasileiro Sexo scene. Anyway, I came in about 10 minutes after she first entered my room. I said lets take a shower together (like Montreal) and she said "no" and started dressing. I said, "Wait, what about the massage?" She rubbed my back for 3-minutes and said "Oh baby I dont really give a message. This is just another name for sex." She got up and dressed. She left her name and phone number and said next time I will stay the night and she was gone in 15 minutes. Being a gringo in another country I let her go.

A few years later I was in the same bar entertaining clients. I knew the scene now and I spoke some portuguese. I pretended to go to the bathroom and I started up the stairs to the bar so I could check out the hookers. Who did I bump into but Andrea coming down the stairs. I stopped her and she pretended to remember me. After 3 minutes I asked her to go back up to the bar and wait for me. I would call her in 30 minutes to an hour and then have her sent up to my room. She turned around and went back up the stairs. As she walked up the stairs I told her to have anything she wants and I will put it on my room tab. I left her there hoping I could waste as much of her time as I could. I went back to my room (in the hotel across the street) and I put her name on the Sampa thread on ISG with her phone number and I told all the ISG'rs to avoid her like the plague. My only hope was I could get that hour back and waste as much of her time as possible and maybe stick her with a bar bill as payback.

I learned the language and how to deal with GDP's. I am much wiser now. You have to dicker with the freelancers a little and show them that they cannot walk all over you etc. or they will.

 

[Halloween Mike]

I have not as many experience as you guys, but here is my top 3 least favorite...

1) Beta-Teste

I refuse to call this my first escort... i mean, it could even be my first sex session period... so i tend to call this the beta-testing, like when a product is not finished and they just test it... Anyway it was in sherbrooke, i was young, fan of strippers, was wasting a lot of money at strippers for nothing much(touching only...) so i tried to contact Douce Extase... i was around maybe 22 or 23... im now 27... Anyway got to the place... the girl look trough the glass, she open, i must have scary her a bit since my friend was with me, he wanted to just "see her" since he was my driver that night. She was like " huh wich one?" and i said me, he just drive me, and then my friend turn around. The girl was not super pretty but not ugly either, more like a girl i wouldn't really give a second look in a bar in a lust way but if she would come to me, i would not turn around. So well... she was supose to do BBJ for 20$ more, the agency said, she refused cause she didn't like my dick(all SPs i saw in montreal didn't mind, and some where extremely freaking hot) So i get a CBJ and remember its my first time... i never had a BJ so for 2 years i tough Blowjobs where not fun.... cause lets face it, with a condom, i think it suck in the bad sense of the word... So i ask for sex after like 10 mins... since i only had half an hour and man she did the star...dead star actually... i pumped her maybe 6-7 time and she was eyes close not moving... i decided to just go back to the BJ cause i didn't want my first experience to be like fucking a sleeping girl... that would be weird... I manage to cum... the session was nearly over, she asked me how it was... i telled the truth, i mentioned i did tell her it was my first time and i was expecting better, she said can't please everybody then i leaved... And i mourned the 100$ i lost that night... when i could had fun at the strip club(wich at that time satisfied me) This scared me of the escort scene for a couple years, thanks to Kim (indy) who came to sherbrooke i got back to it a couple years later.

The next 2 are NOT terrible experiences but more like "the worst i had" but outside that beta test i didn't had one that was horrible like you mentioned above.

2)

Kristina at Angel Escort : Girl was friendly and fun to chat with, but it was too obvious she didn't want to have sex with me. She always stoped during the BJ asking me if it was good... not one time but like 5-6... cmon don't stop damn... lol I didn't go the full round with her(no intercourse) and i was supose to cum in her mouth, it was part of the service based on the listing but she telled me she stoped doing it and asked the owner to remove it, but he didn't yet, so i asked for a big tip if it was ok... she agreed after a couple asking... but when it was time to cum she pulled her hair and pretended it was to ... huh sorry don't know how to say it in english but "pour renifler et evité de me morver dessus...) So she miss totally the CIM and some of it landed in her hair... I was disapointed and of course she didn't got any tip for that... Too bad cause she was pretty, very pretty and the chat was fun. I even telled her at the end would she had been my barber or whatever its call in english, the person who cut your hair, i would had take her again for sure. I said also you can't expect all clients to be collin farrel look-a-like... or whoever you find sexy these days... she didn't really know what to say.

3)

Tabatha at Angel : She came in like she was on speed or something, very controlling, i asked her to remove her lingerie and she refused asking me why i didn't like it... well i just like the girls to be naked... not have stuff in the way... She gave me a very hard BJ, too hard to me, she was not delicate at all, she even almost hurt me to some point, literaly... Sex was brief but good... But it was the first escort(outside beta test) i had trouble cumming, i had to finish up myself over her mouth to CIM. It happened before i could not cum twice... but hey first time was not a problem and it was mostly because time was in the way. But with her i had trouble. Worst of all, she mentioned many time she was kind of in a hurry, so pushing me to cum, and she left when 20 mins was still on the clock... she didn't even shower(but i think she hand washed the pussy cause she stoped at the bathroom, but didn't remove her damn attire)

But to Angel Escorts defense, if i had my 2 worst experience with them, i also had one of my best(Angelina) that i rank execo with another one and another very good one with Tanya(my latest escort) , this remind me i never reviewed her... should do that actually. Tony and Tabatha also offered her a free hour(with Tabatha) but due to restriction on my side(being from sherbrooke, not being able to stay as long as i would, and having to match the free hour with the other girl i want to see, wich can be hard) i never took it. To be honest, i never tough i would say this, but if Tabatha physically was attractive, the session itself didn't inspired me of a repeat...

So i guess you have it... Im still planning to use Angel Escorts, there roster is very impressive visually speaking(cause of the current roster, only saw Tanya wich was a very positive experience) and i like they list the services, allow pre-booking and such. I guess i just had bad lucks. Kristina was very new, Tabatha may had been on substance... anyway they both seem to have got good reviews, so maybe it was me that was the problem for them... For Kristina it was my look obviously... For Tabatha maybe its just me that don't like her type of service... i like soft not rough...

 

[rumpleforeskiin]

3. 2005-The Clown: A very hot little slim cutie from Celines. Came in with food complaining she was hungry. During conversation she started insulting Montrealers, Americans, and some hobbyists. Insulted my wine too, then jumped up on the table and started guzzling like a drunk sailor. I managed to have some sex, but I was too put off to enjoy it much.

One of the quickest wits I've ever come across.

 

[anon_vlad]

My worst, which occurred, before I was aware of the existence of merb, was with the prominent bait and switch and outright robbery agency http://montreal-ladies.com/. I didn't know enough then to realize I was being set up when the woman explained that the payment was to be deposited by the driver before the session started to foil stiffing customers. The SP? (question mark as I will never know if she ever has sex for money) never returned after taking the money. The agency hung up on me when I complained. On leaving the hotel room with no cash left even had I wished to call anywhere else, I noticed a fairly expensive scarf missing!

The second worst was with another agency (whose name eludes me), but also apparently with the same owner as the aforementioned thieves. After affectionately kissing and undressing me, the SP suddenly needed to go the bathroom. She said that her period had started and the agency would send someone else. She ran off when I asked for a refund and, of course, nobody from that agency ever appeared.

 

[Halloween Mike]

My worst, which occurred, before I was aware of the existence of merb, was with the prominent bait and switch and outright robbery agency http://montreal-ladies.com/. I didn't know enough then to realize I was being set up when the woman explained that the payment was to be deposited by the driver before the session started to foil stiffing customers. The SP? (question mark as I will never know if she ever has sex for money) never returned after taking the money. The agency hung up on me when I complained. On leaving the hotel room with no cash left even had I wished to call anywhere else, I noticed a fairly expensive scarf missing!

The second worst was with another agency (whose name eludes me), but also apparently with the same owner as the aforementioned thieves. After affectionately kissing and undressing me, the SP suddenly needed to go the bathroom. She said that her period had started and the agency would send someone else. She ran off when I asked for a refund and, of course, nobody from that agency ever appeared.

Damn.. poor you, those are really robbing plain and simple... In the first case i get that you may have not known, but for the second you should had restrain her and don't let her go until she gave you back the cash... In any case... NEVER EVER pay in advance... i think this is probably the best advice period.... ever. LOL

 

[rollingstone]

Wow I was surprised how many SP and agency names I could not quite remember. Here are my worst 5, in no particular order

1. Parlez vous francais? (2006)

My first time in Montreal. I book a duo with two girls thinking my dreams are about to come true. Keep in mind this duo was well reviewed a week ago. Anyway, girls show up and won`t quit talking to each other in french and giggling when they look at me. I tried hard to ignore it and just focus on what they were doing to me, but they kept at it (even during a dual ). Finally I asked them to leave.

2. The real GFE (2006)

This was my second encounter in montreal, and same day as the encounter I described earlier. She was a well reviewed SP from well known agency and she had not shaved her legs. She said that this would be an `authentic GFE experience` since she does not shave for her boyfriend either!

3. The sister (2008)

So this SP from Devilish comes in and I start thinking to myself that there is something familiar about her but could not quite remember who she reminded me of. It was not until 15 minutes later when I was dining at the Y when I realized she looked a bit like my sister. I promptly stopped and explained the situation to her, she got furious and said something along the lines ``I remind you of your sister...and you only realize this after we make out start licking down there??`` It was a horrible night.

4. The bad smell (2009)
This SP had something going on in her Y. I couldn`t quite smell it during DATY, but during FS it just got stronger and stronger with each thrust, until it stench was strong enough for crowd control. I asked her to leave but she disappeared to the bathroom and came back saying the smell would never return. I could not even look at her. I asked her to leave. The agency called and they were worried that their return to Montreal would be ruined if it got out on MERB. They kept insisting that they would make it up to me if I didn`t write a review. I told them I was only interested in the fact that she took the entire envelope despite staying only 1.5 of the 3 hours. They offered to make up the missing time, but I never took them up on it and have not hobbied since that day.

5. Chicken Sandwich (2007)
This SP arrived with her breath smelling like a roasted-garlic-chicken sandwich, which she confirmed as eating prior to arrived. She declined my offer of scope/listerine. She opened the envelope and counted the money in front of me before pocketing it. She then proceeded to disrobe. She wasn`t overweight, but she was flatchested, and I mean totally flat and she appeared to have not shaved her legs for a few weeks and her Y for a really long time. I asked her to leave and thankfully she gave up the cash.

I know SPs on this board will frequently defend their right to open the envelope and count the money, but for me it has become a bad omen. Never has any session that began with counting and pocketing the cash ended well with me.

 

[hungry101]

Gosh, there are some awful dates! here I think we need to chronicle our 5 best sessions as well because this is depressing.

 

[Lily from Montreal]

Mine will make you laugh:I experienced a bad-escort-by-proxy last Saturday.

If it was a thread the title would be:'' Note to self : never rent on the first floor'' loll,

What happen is since it was a long weekend I decided to go to Chablis and rent a room for the night, since it was as my real life persona I hid in the car, I have no problem having the desk guy see me as Lily but not as me loll...

So we start having fun and around 23h there is a altercation next door, a girl, I really cannot use the term lady is locked out and banging on the door to be let in...then she leaves but what she decided to do do is circle the motel, our rooms were on the ground floor facing the street and you might recall ,it was really hot Saturday so we had left the window open a bit...
And yes she got this notion of going in her room using the window loll, but climbed or tried to climb into our room loll, I mean she was skinny but not that skinny and impaired by whatever she was under influenced, she did not succeed in coming in but she did break the mood a bit loll...
Lesson learned, always rent on the second floor for an overnight loll

The night ladies are really different aren't they? A totally different species of the daytime variety loll

 

[czar]

i posted this once before but thought it might be funny enough to post again.

I remember years ago....before the Internet, CL, and MERB, I responded to an add in a local paper in Toronto. The add was for a hot blond, wide open service, Greek, etc, etc. I called and was directed to am apartment building in Scarborough. It was a little shady, but I was hooked. Go up to the apartment and a gorgeous girl opens the door! I'm now very pleased with my choice. She welcome me in, I take off my shoes, and we head for the bedroom! The bedroom was sparse...just a mattress on the floor and a chair. She asks for the money and tells me to take a seat and she'll be right back. So...I sit. A few minutes she comes back and ask me what I'm looking for. I reply that everything on the menu sounded good. She says OK...turns around and opens a closet door and pulls out a blow up sex doll!!! I sat WTF! She says ...go ahead and do what you want...and btw there are cameras in the room (I look up and sure enough!) and her boyfriend is in the next room! So...I say no thanks and got the f@&k out of there fast!

Czar

 

[hungry101]

Czar - You win. This is the fucking worst encounter in the thread. LMAO!

 

[evillethings]

czar ... that's totally messed up! ...a sex doll.

reminds me of the time i hit some incall massage or FS place downtown MTL at 1AM on a Tuesday during the fall of 2005.

there were 2 girls working and my buddy grabbed the big breasted voluptuous brunette with the pretty face
i got left with 5'9 blonde anorexic with stripper nails & heels, big nipples on a flat chest
she led me to a room with a thin mattress on the floor...
there was a camera mounted on the ceiling and all i could think of was,
"FUCKING BASTARD _ _ _" I'm going to run my key on your hood you S.O.B.!"
I had a 19 year old blonde version of Celine Dion with zombie-esk body
her nails were so long they were starting to curl in on themselves and had all that glitter shit on it
I was honestly a little baked and drunk so sex was going to be a challenge
she kept saying "Can you cum for me tonight?"
to which i kept answering in my head "No, do you think you can stop stroking my dick because your nails are freaking me out!"
i recall her trying to stuff my limp stump into her pussy... weeeeeeird! fucking weird!
though i guess "nice effort" was in order but I could've done it myself if i really wanted to be inside you freak!
i just didn't want to exit the room and sit outside with her in front of the receptionist for 40mins while waiting for _ _ _ to finish!
so i told her Im tired and to just lay down and relax.
of course, she took offense to that and started telling me she was hot and guys always got off with her. LOL
relax, the time was already paid for so claim down.
let's face it, when you're baked, the pretty get prettier and the ugly get downright scary looking.

i've avoided incall since that experience and i think thats the last girl that I saw who wore red lingerie.

 

[Merlot]

So...I sit. A few minutes she comes back and ask me what I'm looking for. I reply that everything on the menu sounded good. She says OK...turns around and opens a closet door and pulls out a blow up sex doll!!! I sat WTF! She says ...go ahead and do what you want...and btw there are cameras in the room...

Czar

Hmmm,

Was she too tall, too short, not blonde, too old and haggardly...or was she stinky from a long night of work. Just asking what your specific objection was; not interested for myself.

I can't imagine that she was too restrictive. She probably would be more fun than a few HDHs I've met, I mean...at least she wouldn't talk forever and waste my time.

Happy surprises,

Merlot

 

[czar]

>>> One more f**&$% useless quote deleted! Mod 11

Merlot,
Lol...very funny...no the doll looked fine, i was just pissed that i could have bought my own doll with the money i had just wasted...

 

[Siocnarf]

That's a hell of a bait and switch. Do you have to blow it yourself?

 

[Halloween Mike]

there were 2 girls working and my buddy grabbed the big breasted voluptuous brunette with the pretty face
i got left with 5'9 blonde anorexic with stripper nails & heels, .

Damn... i guess its one of the reason why i wouldn't be interest of going for a random incall location with a friend... i wouldn't have let my friend go with the hot one just like that... i think it would had been rock paper scissor and the looser got to bang her second... well this is also a bit weird since its your friend just before you, but i guess you know there was another dude before you.. so at least you know your friend is clean and all...

Maybe the ugly one would had been piss but well... being in your situation must be terrible... you loose big money and you get trash talk because you can't do anything with the girl... As for the camera... woaaa... you accepted to try to do something with a camera filming? I mean you could end up on the internet... worse, this could be use againt you... I think you just totally erase incall from my vocabulary ever...

But i guess the sex doll guy win... as worst experience ever... i think i would be like "you kiddin me" give me back my cash and im out of here.

 

[hungry101]

Did it ever occur to you that you could pass and go to another incall? This is something I learned in Brazil. You go to a privy and the girls walk out and kiss you on the cheek and you pick to session with the one that you like. If you don't like any, you walk out the door and go to another privy. Thi is similar to Thailand. Go to another Incall and Meet back up with your buddy at the bar

 

[Numerati]

1) ``Sensual`` Cleo (2007). Nothing sensual about her. Should change her name to Menstrual Cleo. Talked to many folks privately and most of them had the same experiences I had and two even told me she would not give them a HJ unless it was covered. WHAT??? Only one dude raved about her. Has an attitude problem and somewhat emotionally unstable. If you had a good encounter with her, I am really happy that you got your money`s worth. She is NOT from Montreal as she initially stated. Actually from France which explains a lot.

2) Bianka of The companions/XXXtase (2004). My second SP. Met her in July 2004 at the Hilton Bonaventure. Saw her pre-boob job. Nastiest looking pair of boobs I have ever encountered. The only girl I have run into where I think she needs a boob job. Reminds me of something you see in National Geographic. Talked on the phone for a good 10 minutes because her pit bull was acting up and didn`t like the guy installing the security system in her home. Yet there was a plus side to this encounter though. I never thought I could cum so hard if my nipples were tweaked and twisted. From that experience I realized I really enjoy pain.

3) Gabrielle of Luv Sisters (2005 to 2006). First encounter was great but the second one was crap. In the second encounter which was a dinner date she pulled a total 360 because she changed her policy to CBJ going forward with everyone. If she told me before hand I would of cancelled the whole appointment. It was a performance bait and switch. Felt an attitude problem somewhat since the beginning but wasn`t something overpowering. She was a great screw the first time around though. Her BJ in 69 was out of this world and that was why I wanted to see her again. After talking to some folks behind the scenes they told me she was Mia who worked at Thetis. If I knew that I would of never pulled the trigger.

4) Sienna West (2010). Stayed at the Encore. Saw her in Las Vegas when she was touring that city. A total let down all around. Cold. Mechanical. And not to forget CBJ only. Plus age starting to show its ugly head and her boobs are starting to droop down. Also now she has a nasty big tat on her back. I can deal with that kind of bullshit performance at say $160 an hour but not if it is $1,800/hr. Had very high expectations given that she is a porn star and I really enjoyed her scenes. One of the worst next to Cleo. Cut the meeting short to one hour as opposed to two as originally planned. Red Flag with porn stars: When suddenly she starts doing black dudes in her scenes, you should know that things are going no where but down.

5) Tasha of MGF. Saw her in March 2011 when she was touring my city. Got an e-mail promotion for a two hour discount. So I immediately jumped at the chance. Now I know why MGF would be giving a discount with this girl. She did what she was supposed to do but it was a let down. I was expecting more since it was MGF and the girls there in my opinion cream of the crop since Alexandra and Lola know how to recruit. She was able to squeeze three shots out of me but by the third shot she opted for a HJ. If you are a one shot guy you would like her but if you are still built like a bull performance wise she would not be the girl to see.