Do you use your real name and phone ?

[Mithridate]

As I said before, I do give my real name, phone number and something a way to see my face, am i naive? No transparent, i have always has been and i always will be, and I like when there a are a screening process, somehow for me its reassuring.
Qapla
M.

 

[BookerL]

Hummmm !
I have been called Booker for so long ,its almost real .Lol

As for the number it is one of the real many number I use !



Cheers



Booker

 

[Grinder1]

This is whats written..I am sure you can go back and edit the post

The pits and falls of typing on a phone at 2AM.

 

[EdaBlackwood]

Mostly it's the pits

 

[Maria Divina]

As for a screening process... I think SP references work well. Did it out West without a hitch. Let's protect the girls, but let's be safe doing so. I think that would also do wonders in ridding this board with the rediculous amount of non-contributing lurkers.

.nb

There is few ways to screen. But at a point or another, ladies are generally asking for a "real detail", whatever it could be.
References are, real names are, real phone numbers are, to be a verified members of screenings club is also.

My point was just to let the liberty of each ladies to ask whatever she might be just find more trusty and being comfortable to go with.

Of course, I will suggest strongly to be cautious to whom you give your informations, but right at the beginning, should you just choose carefully your companion you deal with?

Maybe, sometimes, to think what is a real bargain in life and what is worth give perspectives on this.

But we all know, some people just like to play with fire in hope to be able to not be burn while doing it.

We're living in a free country, so to each their thrills. :lol:

*just a little add: I know, sometimes we could have bad surprises unexpected....... but seriously, we have to be honest, sometimes, to deal with people not really renowned could lead more easily to some kind of misadventures.

 

[neverbored]

There is few ways to screen. But at a point or another, ladies are generally asking for a "real detail", whatever it could be.
References are, real names are, real phone numbers are, to be a verified members of screenings club is also.

My point was just to let the liberty of each ladies to ask whatever she might be just find more trusty and being comfortable to go with.

Not everyone has the best intentions, but that can go both ways right? Should us "Johns" not also be entitled to the same level of comfort and security?

But we all know, some people just like to play with fire in hope to be able to not be burn while doing it.

There is a certain rush to meeting someone unknown, I'll admit. I'm guessing in some ways you ladies can experience that in a new client, perhaps being his first. That nervousness can sometimes be luscious. I'm sure that when you realize that you're meeting a better customer rather than the opposite that is just as reassuring right?

*just a little add: I know, sometimes we could have bad surprises unexpected....... but seriously, we have to be honest, sometimes, to deal with people not really renowned could lead more easily to some kind of misadventures.

This also goes both ways... I've had a girl pull a full 180 on me after a bad experience in her life (or with another client) go into full rage at me for having to postpone an encounter. I was a regular of hers and had never shown any form of disrespect. She later excused her behaviour. But this could have turned for the worst had I given her my real contact details. She stirred a lot of crap for a friend that was also seeing her (I referred him). He wasn't so lucky and had all sorts of personal stuff exposed to the public. It took Facebook a lot of time to react and the damage was done. She even tried to apologize... can you imagine? How does one come back from that? lol

My point however, is I get some people don't see any reason to keep their identities private. But when I see providers expose their bad experiences, we're just seeing one side of it. I'm not implying that those guys aren't creeps or assholes. But say the wrong thing out of innocence to a person having a bad day (guy or girl) and you're likely not to have the most adult response. For example, I know you girls get a billion messages a day asking for the same stupid things (How r u, what's up, do this? do that?, give me a deal ?, gimme a freebie, etc) of course this is cause for irritation. Nobody wants to receive a message that seems to be written by a complete moron who's trying to take advantage of you. But I for one would never send out a full paragraph as a 1st message, I want to at least make sure I'm reaching the right person. Should I be punished for that?

I just think that that form of lynching is simply unacceptable and they get away with it is because they can (C-36, a eager waiting list, ... ). Some women will argue that boards such as merb do the same thing... but again they have the luxury of hiding behind their anonymous persona and most boards are strict when it comes to disclosing any personal details.

This being said, why someone would even consider sharing any real personal information before even meeting a girl is beyond me. Are there not enough horror stories out there?

Is there a better solution? I guess that's what I was hoping to get out of this. I've seen those verification systems. I've never actually used them, are they any good? Do people trust such systems? I'm guessing this is sort of an "escrow" system for contacts right?

There must be a better way to improve the experience for both parties in a secure manner. But perhaps there is not real need for it and I'm just being paranoid...

Sorry for the rant guys ... I can't sleep

 

[Maria Divina]

Neverbored:

Thank you very much for your extensive answer. I like it when someone is able to exchange and having some valid points instead of just answer back with insults.

I won't quote, in the spirit to keep my post "light" visually.

Yes, gentlemen should be entitled of the same comfort. In fact, everybody should just feel comfortable before an encounter.

For the logistic part of the encounter, we will have to share a space, and this space could be yours, could be mine, and exactly in the purpose of safety and of discretion, the host should just be sure that the guest he/she willing to invite will be fine, and not live eventually any kind of violence.

I'm very sorry that you lived and your friend, a date who turned bad after with the ONE and same Sp. I don't know where you did find her, if she was a very known and respectable girl/lady. I don't wish to anyone bad dates, that's for sure. Isn't one of the goal of Merb to expose those bad behaviours? This Sp just did the worst thing for her business. As I stated previously, yes, we could have bad surprises, but generally in our days, I'm repeating, for the gentlemen choosing a reputable lady with a good internet presence has always be a good hint that you will find a trustable and a free drama person.

For the part of the ladies, how can we be sure to have this kind of hint from someone who is willing to share a private get together? So here are the screenings.

Neverbored, I invite you to give some alternative ideas apart the recommendations, because we know that's not everybody who could have it for different reasons. I would be very interested to have a couple of propositions of yours who will satisfy your needs.

What would you do if you were a Sp who need to know that the "John" (as you say yourself) or maybe in your case the "Mary" your are going to meet is a safe and sane person to be alone with? That you will be feel safe before your get together? Tell us how you will proceed if you were this Sp. What would you ask to your "Mary" before to meet her?

By the way, I just think about it: I never heard about a Sp who has been a serial client's killer. Did this ever happen?

 

[neverbored]

Hi Maria,

thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts. You've asked a few questions and made interesting points that I would absolutely love to explore.

First of all, the girl I was talking about was a very popular and respected provider back in the day (2000-2005-ish) so that means I found her the same place as I found you... on-line I'm not sure if it was on this board. It might even have been on Canbest (circa 1995). She was quite classy, well educated and quite mature. In fact, I don't even think she had ever received a negative review. But it wasn't long that the word got out.

As for reputational value. Whatever "status" a person might have (or think they have), does it really reflect on the integrity of that person? Donald Trump for instance. He's a billionaire. Do you think this makes him trustable and a good person? Same goes for Tiger Woods, he cheated on his wife with numerous sex workers it was scandalous. So he was a pervert into kinky stuff... does that mean he masturbates at night covered in jello watching kittens explode in a microwave?

Humans, as a species, are extremely fragile. So many things can change a person's state of mind that aren't in their control: natural or artificial chemical imbalance, stress, drama (real or not), people, health, this list is infinite. We are reminded daily as to how fragile we are and how in reality all we're doing is managing chaos on a regular basis. I mean, just turn on your tv, look at TMZ, CNN, Journal De Montreal and you can get your daily fix of tragedies.

I've had my share of relationships with women blaming their drama to "being too sensitive to their emotions", "being passionate", "deep sense of commitment". Personally, I think anyone that has to scream to get their point across, that thinks she can disrespect people I care about, throw stuff at the walls, break things, spread rumours, etc... as simply: bad-shit-crazy-get-your-fucking-meds-and-stay-on-them.

How many guys have you seen first hand be charming and nice for the longest time only to suddenly turn and become some crazy asshole? A guy can see a thousand providers and have raving comments said about him. He can turn on you at any time... does that make you nervous? It should... that feeling is what keeps you alive. Being street smart and perhaps knowing how to defend yourself is what keeps you alive. The fact that you know his name, his real phone number, where he works, how many friends he has on Facebook is really an artificial sense of security. It might however be enough to keep broke ass lurkers away but we all know that its not going to save your life in case of a real threat. I don't think these are much better as an extreme deterrent, but what are your thoughts on services such as: getluxverified, preferred411, purevip, date-check? Any good?

So your business model puts in in direct contact with the scum of the earth wasting your valuable time with stupid/tasteless questions, harassing messages, to me that just sounds like the wonderful world of sales and customer service. Its not for everyone.

Still doesn't justify lynching someone in the public sphere displaying their personal details no matter how much of an creep the guy is. It just seems wrong and immature and probably impacts the "brand" negatively in the long run. All it does is prove to me that that person has a very poor sense of judgement and re-enforces how that can't be trusted. You do not bite the hand that feeds you (or the hand that spanks you depending on who you are).

Finally, to comment on your question about SP serial killers, the only case I know of is Aileen Wuornos. The story that inspired the movie Monster played by Charlize Theron (2003). Surely there are many more cases. But in return I ask you do you know how many men's lives were ruined by a woman who betrayed their agreement (moral or paid) out of spite or greed? Or worst, how many took away a fathers right to see their children out of pure hatred ? Not all men are evil & not all women are saints.

So no. I will not blindly trust an escort or anyone else for that matter with my personal details and I do think its a bad idea. I don't say that out of paranoia. But simply out of experience. Most of the girls I've been with have told me intimate details about their customers. Stuff I clearly shouldn't know which makes it probably that they would tell others about me... from that very moment, any trust I had in them is gone.

Thanks for reading.

-nb


PS. My initial motivation for this discussion came from a blog post (which I will not disclose) where an SP spilled the beans about one of her customers with pictures, full legal names. But the internet are full of such cases.

 

[Maria Divina]

Neverbored,

Thanks a lot to take a good amount of time to be back to me. This morning, I don't have an extended time as you did have to get back to this thread, and I will answer "by point" I have a feeling that we are not on the same page, but that's very fine. We are allowed to think and to act accordingly to what we believe.

-Ok, you did find her on internet. Good! She had great testimonies? Good! but that was ONE lady, and certainly, she has to quit after that event. I repeat, I feel compassion that you lived and your friend such bad situation.

-I think you interpret the "reputation" I was referring to in a totally differently way I was talking about (you talked about Trump and Wood, with funny points who are not correlated at all to how an escort would be reputable)

-In my humble experiences with men, they are much more having an equal state of mind and of behaviours that what you are referring to. If someone is generally nice, he will be certainly nice with me too. The inner nature of people cannot change drastically so much when sharing the same kind of activity with someone else, in the same context.

-Sorry to hear that you have a kind of karma to find women who lose patience with you.

-The fact to know true & verifiable details about my partner of encounter..... is how it works from ages. I have asked you suggestions how you would do, and you did not give any suggestion at all. Now, you are talking to "Being street smart and perhaps knowing how to defend yourself". So, are you implying that women should just accept to meet anyone who is asking and be ready to fight? Ok, that's a suggestion, but this suggestion is not valid. We are all trying here to avoid this beforehand.

-About the references boards, I suggest you to ask to gentlemen how they like it, and maybe have a look how it works, so maybe you will be more at ease with those. But like any other thing, take your references before.

-To display in plain public when someone is a "time waster" or try to not respect the limits and pushy, I don't think it has to go that further, but certainly those informations are very useful to know to other ladies to stay away. If someone attacked or do harassment, it should directly be expose to the police, not the internet.
But this said, I don't deal personally with dangerous people and I don't have to do such thing. Why? Because it is note easy as just make a quick telephone to meet with me.

-Thank you to answer about the "serial killer" question. :smile:

-Your 2 last paragraphes make me think of someone who had lived such bad experiences with women generally and that left him with a kind of bitter taste toward them and no trust at all.
I just don't know what kind of girls you are meeting who are talking about precise personal informations about others (name, telephone, address). It makes no sense at all why someone would do that. Where did you find those dates?

I hope you will have a majority of very good encounters to your tastes.

 

[Mithridate]

Nerverbored,

I have red your last two posts.

In one you say and I quote ( I do not know how to copy and paste )"This being said, why someone would even consider sharing any real personal information before even meeting a girl is beyond me. Are there not enough horror stories out there?"

This is for me clearly to judge the way other people decide to do things including myself.

I share a lot of personal information before meeting a person, but before I do, I try to find the right person, call it instinct i do not know, but so far no horror stories, granted i have not met a lot, sorry if you had some bad experiences, but that is life.

The second quote is
"So no. I will not blindly trust an escort or anyone else for that matter with my personal details and I do think its a bad idea. I don't say that out of paranoia. But simply out of experience. Most of the girls I've been with have told me intimate details about their customers. Stuff I clearly shouldn't know which makes it probably that they would tell others about me... from that very moment, any trust I had in them is gone"

I am not here to judge you, I have met two SP about 10 years ago, and during our meeting they began to talk about their boyfriends, suffice it to say that it was like a cold shower.

But these things happen, after worth, the SP I met 8 times and the others recently were very kind, they never talked about other clients, or their personal life, sure after seeing a person 8 times, you know a bit more, but i never asked anything of them.

So despite some bad encounters or even bad experiences with my love life, Yes i fell on the ground , but in my humble opinion it serve no purpose to stay on the ground, on the contrary I take these bad moments as fuel to become a better person, to grow my sageness in a way, i am 62 i have seen a lot of thing, good things and bad things, but I always kept the idea that there are sunshine behind the clouds.

I think, me, you or anybody else should not generalize after bad moments or experiences, and I dont think you do, I know it let you a bitter taste in your mouth when these "horror stories" happened but there are a lot gems out there, and i am talking about humans, men or women, so trust is the first link forged to create a better humanity.

I will end by quoting somebody " But the road from legitimate suspicion to rampant paranoia is very much shorter than we think " and we live in a world of violence, ISIS is one, the Spanish inquisition was one long ago, but lets fight this with trust, otherwise these people will won.

And by no mean do I say that i have " la vérité infuse " its just the opinion of a normal man who have overcome not without difficulty, sad or bad moments in my life
Qapla
M.

 

[CockAsian69]

My real Name is Dick Orient so there! Now you all know! Just I am sure that all the girls are honest with me. I also think the bookers use their real names too.
It's an illusion, a fantasy, and ultimately a choice on what you choose and do not choose to expose to others. Anyhow my 3 cents, rounded up to a nickel with how we deal with pennies now.

CA OUT!!!

 

[Numerati]

My real Name is Dick Orient so there! Now you all know! Just I am sure that all the girls are honest with me. I also think the bookers use their real names too.
It's an illusion, a fantasy, and ultimately a choice on what you choose and do not choose to expose to others. Anyhow my 3 cents, rounded up to a nickel with how we deal with pennies now.

CA OUT!!!

Hahahahahahaha....

Agree on all fronts!

 

[JerryRogers]

Does it matter if you are calling a reputable agency?

 

[Sol Tee Nutz]

I use my real name, ricky bonds. (I rarely say my name at all though, but when i do its my real name...ricky bonds)

Really? So when I did my bank transaction with you the bank has a fake name and your real name is on an escort board, sure am thankful that you are one truthful person :noidea:

Yes of course, anyone who knows me knows that i hate pimps just as much as i hate agency pimps that pay ridiculously low wages to girls.

From a different thread but did not want that one to go stray also. Coming from a person that uses the " I forgot my wallet and will pay you later and never does ", Cinderella, gets freebies for reviews and manages a few girls I find this a strange comment.
Probably applies to my comment above.

 

[FreeG]

I use my real name and only have one phone.

I choose my providers carefully, treat them with respect and have nothing to hide from anyone (single).

These women are putting themselves at risk every time they work...I figured the least I can do is treat them well and be honest.

Out.

Well said! I agree its gotta be riskier for the woman than the man. (personally, I don't know how some do it - show up w/o ANY knowledge of who they're seeing). At least the men know what the women look like and maybe have read some reviews to have a feeling what to expect. But unless the woman has shared emails/texts for a little bit (and even those don't necessarily reflect the true person behind them), they're PROBABLY going in blind. So like JTF2, I use my real first name and share a little bit about myself (not TOO much, I'm actually more concerned on someone else on the boards seeing who I am/what I do; I'd think it be in the woman's best interest to stay discrete and private, unless a client goes WAY over the edge and deserves "public recognition"!

 

[HUMP DuJour]

When I go to fantasy world, I use my fantasy name.

 

[phoenix.wright]

Do you give your real name to escort you visit?

The title says it all.

First of all, I am new here so hello to everyone!

I have been with three escorts so far and everytime they ask me what's my name, my reflex is to automatically say my real name (never the last name though). I was wondering if you guys do the same or use a nickname with a new escort. I really don't mind that an escort with whom I would've had multiple encounteers knows my real name, but what about the first meeting...what do you guys think?

 

[Doc Holliday]

It depends how i feel....

 

[rollingstone]

Yes I provide full name when meeting indies. I am an outcall person though and so they are visiting me, as opposed to me visiting them. Agencies have never requested my full name, and I never volunteered.

To each his own, some providers I frequent will not meet anyone without full name and verification, and some hobbyists I know will never meet someone with those kind of requirements. Montreal is great in that you find providers and agencies across the spectrum, something for everyone.

But if you are asking this question because its required by someone you are trying to meet, then yes its quite normal as a condition set by an SP.

 

[phoenix.wright]

No, I wasn't required to provide my real name so far, it was just a general question. Thanks for sharing your opinion. It's true that Montreal offers a lots of diversity for everyone!