How to quit the Hobby/Addiction?

[613ottawaguy]

Yes we are but the bookers are our dealers and the ladies our drug! Lol!

Ah true lmao!

I actually want to be a booker myself but I'd imagine it would be allot of hassle and money to invest. Those guys are living the dream! Making money by being a pimp without really being one.

If this shit was more legal and lot less shady in the public eyes then Id open my own agency! I would personally see the girls and display the service acronyms they provide.

 

[Fradi]

^^^^

I think being a booker/owner would be the last thing I would want to be.
Can you imagine trying to mange 20 or so 21-25 year old gorgeous young women, what an impossible task.

No thanks I will stick to seeing my ATF and occasionally some others, I value my sanity.

 

[613ottawaguy]

^^^


Well you can always hire people to manage the girls for you. You can be the owner and financial backer. Doesn't mean you have to get practical.

 

[Melyssa]

Peux-t-on vraiment quitter ce hobby ?

Je pense que oui et non en quelque sorte. Bien quand on a un brin d’amour pour soi.

 

[Doggyluver]

For me it's not an addiction it's a way to see and have sex with people I want to fuck and not have the trappings of a relationship. I was married and still have a terrible taste in my mouth from that and a bad relationship after my divorce. I would love to have a relationship where she only cares about me and is honest all the time, I would give the same . I don't think it's possible. This way when I want to fuck someone I can and than don't have to worry about anything else

 

[Doggyluver]

I should add that I haven't seen anyone, in or out of the hobby since the end of February so it's possible to stop given the right motivation.

 

[chowzilla]

Ah true lmao!

I actually want to be a booker myself but I'd imagine it would be allot of hassle and money to invest. Those guys are living the dream! Making money by being a pimp without really being one.

If this shit was more legal and lot less shady in the public eyes then Id open my own agency! I would personally see the girls and display the service acronyms they provide.

lol that is not how it works. at all. This is the common recipe to making a failed agency.

 

[chinavibez]

lol that is not how it works. at all. This is the common recipe to making a failed agency.

lol that is not how it works. at all. This is the common recipe to making a failed agency.

Dealing with OC, LE, fighting with other agencies, I could go on for days. But hey, he’s from Ottawa, let’s cut the guy some slack.

 

[chowzilla]

its possible to quit, but its very tough. You're alternative has to be as satisfying. I think its in our biology that will never let us quit cold turkey. Worse than a drug, as it is not something we are born with.

Hobbiests who have quit:
- found a new calling in life
- found a girlfriend/wife (sometimes but rarely a girl from the industry)
- got caught by their wife and now are in family prison
- moved on with SA
- can't handle the game, guys who fall too deep in the fantasy to the point they ruin the hobby for themselves

 

[chowzilla]

Dealing with OC, LE, fighting with other agencies, I could go on for days. But hey, he’s from Ottawa, let’s cut the guy some slack.

I didn't insult him. I'm just pointing out that this is not how you run an agency hence why you see so many subpar agencies that fail. Also wanted to correct the misconception that if you work for an agency, the agency girls are not at your disposal as your personal sex buffet.
You could run it like how you want, but I'm pretty sure every entrepreneur on this planet agrees, you gotta make a successful business before treating yourself.

 

[Julia Sky]

I totally agree with Chowzilla!

Those guys are living the dream! Making money by being a pimp without really being one.

If this shit was more legal and lot less shady in the public eyes then Id open my own agency! I would personally see the girls and display the service acronyms they provide.

1. You probably do not want to be a booker. Hahahah!! I assume you say this because "wow the proximity to the girls and the money" lmao but some bookers never even meet the girls, and also... Booking just for one escort (myself as an indy for example, or a friend as a booker) is a lot of work. Being an agency booker means you spend 8-12 hours a day answering texts and phone calls from guys who, most often, don't read AND don't book. They just ask a gazillion questions. The booker job isn't nearly as glamorous as you seem to think for some reason...

2. Agency owners are, by definition, pimps. No matter how nice they are (and remember that nice to you as a client doesn't mean always nice to the girls, EVEN if the girl says so - just a few months ago a bunch of indies on Twitter, including some from MTL, admitted that they constantly lied about being happy with their agency when they worked for an agency because saying otherwise drives business away or gets them fired). But yeah. Pimp. Prostitutes in my possession. A man who controls prostitutes and arranges clients for them, taking part of their earnings in return. An agency owner is, by definition, a pimp.

3. I hope you'd pay them to see them! But even then... generally, agency owners who fuck the girls who work at the agency are seen as less respectable. We sex workers constantly talk shit about that kind of agency owner. Like Chowzilla said "I'm pretty sure every entrepreneur on this planet agrees, you gotta make a successful business before treating yourself".

 

[No_Church_InThe_Wild]

^^^^ Good advice Chow for everybody, and I mean everybody ...

 

[chowzilla]

Julia, I am always confused when an Independent disses agencies.

Isn‘t every agency lady free to work as an independent?

Merb even allows independents to be identified by their former agency identity ( or identities).

Given the abundance of agency ladies, a high percentage of them must view the transaction as simply an efficient outsourcing of tasks and beneficial pooling of economic resources.

The agency handles advertising, booking, transportation, some level of security, providing of information to customers, and often a shared incall place. Each lady provides a cut of her earnings as payment for those services.

To some ladies, that must be a good deal, since there are so many ladies who work for agencies. To others, they prefer to work and do all those functions by themselves.

Most customers see both agency and independent ladies. I have never met an agency lady who expressed feeling enslaved. I have met plenty of independents whose initial ”Book of Business” came entirely from the guys she met while working at an agency, and I have never heard of an escort having to pay for those contacts - which is a damn good deal compared to many forms of business. I remember having a funny conversation with an agency owner/booker once a long time ago. This agency worked with ladies who toured. I had used the agency a few times and I saw that one of their ladies who had gone independent was touring a city that I was scheduled to visit. I asked the agency lady I should just use my history with them as a reference for the independent. The agency lady said that she hoped I would find the drawer in the Independent‘s hotel room where she hid the cash and send it to the agency, since the lady who had gone independent did not send the agency its share for her last tour with the agency.

I know the question was not intended towards me.
if you allow me...

Every girl is free to work as indy. But Should they?
I think the big picture is that agency girls kind of graduate to being indies. Like building up your credentials or audition to the industry.
obviously there are times where indies become agency girls, because like you said, they prefer outsourcing the administrative work.
It must also depend on whether the girl wants to make a career out of it.
so I don't think all girls should go indy because they either want to keep this short term, or they prefer outsourcing because there is a learning curve to it.

Debutantes who start indy. TRA. (Tough Road Ahead)

That's the reality of agencies vs indies. That's why the top 3 agencies, are always the top 3 agencies. For the majority they know how to treat the girls.

Girls > Clients > Agency
rather than
Agency > Clients > Girls
- chowzilla ©

and to add to my first reply.
"Don't get high on your own supply" - Scarface.

 

[Fradi]

Perhaps this should be in the Indys vs Agency thread lol.
There is obviously room for both and some girls just cannot handle all the extra tasks of managing their time, scheduling, getting a driver and promoting themselves.
For this obviously there is a price to pay.

That being said every Indy I have talked to who worked for an agency before said they are much happier, because they can choose and select their clients, pick their own location where to work from and not have to have so many clients to see to make a living and they are not open to the whims of a booker to make sure they have work.
It stands to reason that they won’t tell you that they would rather be back at an Agency.
Personally I don’t like dealing with a booker nor am I a fan of spinners for the most part that is why I stick with Indies.
I know I could have seen some of the ladies for a better price while they were at an agency rather than when they turned Indy but that doesn’t bother me I like the individual attention and the chemistry/friendship you can develop with an Indy, they know the value of repeat business.

 

[Julia Sky]

(I did not diss agencies, I stated facts... next)

 

[Naturalsex]

Personnellement j’ai eu un gros problème avec cette activité. J’ai finalement réalisé que l’essentiel est l’équilibre comme pour n’importe quoi et d’atteindre le niveau d’équilibre nécessaire pour que tu te sente bien dans ta tête mais également dans d’autres sphères de la vie qui peuvent être touchées par cette activité. Tu dois surtout apprendre à gérer tes pulsions sexuelles, c’est un point important. Si possible, trouver une amoureuse qui t’amènera à t’Éloigner de la prostitution, je crois que c’est la meilleure solution

 

[Bonclay20]

Think about the last bad encounter/service you had before calling. It works for me everytime. I learned that after a bad encounter, it cools me down for little while.

 

[CaptRenault]

...Faites attention à vous messieurs. Et si vous souhaitez quitter cet univers tellement destructeur, lisez quelques textes de ce thread depuis 2005, et écoutez Nelly Arcan via les liens de mon texte. Je crois sincèrement que cela vous aidera beaucoup.

Ce message vous a été transmis par Sisyphe.org, un site féministe d'information, d'analyse et d'opinion. Merci!

 

[2fast2slow]

… en focussant sur ce qui est autour de moi, ma santé, l’activité physique, le travail, m’enrichir, des projets.. voyages, ma vie actuelle et celle des prochaines années .. simple et sans souci.

zzzzz....
the problem is for me, that i find all these activities boring compared to seeing sex workers.

I do all those things, i have a very busy life with lots of side projects, but seeing sex workers is what makes me truly happy. So i will not quit. It becomes a question of what you can afford and sticking to a budget.

 

[sene5hos]

Ce message vous a été transmis par Sisyphe.org, un site féministe d'information, d'analyse et d'opinion. Merci!

Pour moi, cette simple phrase nous en apprend beaucoup sur vous.