Regret and ambivalence

[Jacobisrael]

Hey guys,

I have been in the hobby for close to 10 years (will be 10 in beginning of January). I have probably seen a few hundred of SPs. I always loved the hobby so much, but for the last 2 months, I have been having some deep regrets. Kind of a born again moment, although I am from Jewish and Arab descent. Can some guys that have had the same feeling share it with us? I have always been anti long term marriage type of guy but I’m starting to consider it with age. Any feedback would be nice.

Thank you

 

[talkinghead]

Hey guys,

I have been in the hobby for close to 10 years (will be 10 in beginning of January). I have probably seen a few hundred of SPs. I always loved the hobby so much, but for the last 2 months, I have been having some deep regrets. Kind of a born again moment, although I am from Jewish and Arab descent. Can some guys that have had the same feeling share it with us? I have always been anti long term marriage type of guy but I’m starting to consider it with age. Any feedback would be nice.

Thank you

Perhaps you could say a bit more about what you're going through? Are you experiencing ethical reservations about your participation in the hobby? Is your "born again moment" a spiritual or religious awakening? Or are you thinking that you might have saved your money and sought out a long-term relationship over the last decade instead of indulging in the hobby?

 

[Jacobisrael]

Perhaps you could say a bit more about what you're going through? Are you experiencing ethical reservations about your participation in the hobby? Is your "born again moment" a spiritual or religious awakening? Or are you thinking that you might have saved your money and sought out a long-term relationship over the last decade instead of indulging in the hobby?

When it comes to money and long time relationship I don’t regret that part too much, I assume them fully. It’s probably a bit of ethical part that is getting to my head, lately I have been feeling bad about that part. Some Christian speakers would call that strongholds. I am less in the moment than I use too. I had shorter term relations before but nothing longer than a few months. To sum it up, I am not as happy of a whore monger (sorry even some might find that offensive) as I use to be before. Thank you for your comment. Another detail I started at 18 (I know really young) I am now 28. I have had 4 short terms and a few flings in between 19 non escorts I would say and over 500 ( getting close to 600 working girls, it’s extremely rare that I repeat maybe that’s why the number is that high)
Thanks

 

[Julia Sky]

"Whore monger" lol I assume the word you're looking for is "client" ?

What part of the "ethical" side of things is getting to you more than it did before? I'm just curious. Is it the fact that sex is taboo? The way society sees escorts and their clients? The fact some escorts are being exploited? Something else? I'm genuinely curious but feel free to ignore my question if you'd rather not answer !

 

[Jacobisrael]

"Whore monger" lol I assume the word you're looking for is "client" ?

What part of the "ethical" side of things is getting to you more than it did before? I'm just curious. Is it the fact that sex is taboo? The way society sees escorts and their clients? The fact some escorts are being exploited? Something else? I'm genuinely curious but feel free to ignore my question if you'd rather not answer !

Probably the spiritual side more (Torah, bible part). Not necessarily how society view it or else I wouldn’t do it, to me having sex with a girl from tinder or a fling is not worse or better than an escort morally they are equivalent. Or maybe it’s the boredom after all those years (kind of like when I use to be a video game addict and I’m not anymore and have no interest in it whatsoever) maybe it’s a chapter of my life that is coming to an end. Thank you Julia for ur feedback

 

[Jacobisrael]

Probably the spiritual side more (Torah, bible part). Not necessarily how society view it or else I wouldn’t do it, to me having sex with a girl from tinder or a fling is not worse or better than an escort morally they are equivalent. Or maybe it’s the boredom after all those years (kind of like when I use to be a video game addict and I’m not anymore and have no interest in it whatsoever) maybe it’s a chapter of my life that is coming to an end. Thank you Julia for ur feedback

Probably the spiritual side more (Torah, bible part). Not necessarily how society view it or else I wouldn’t do it, to me having sex with a girl from tinder or a fling is not worse or better than an escort morally they are equivalent. Or maybe it’s the boredom after all those years (kind of like when I use to be a video game addict and I’m not anymore and have no interest in it whatsoever) maybe it’s a chapter of my life that is coming to an end. Thank you Julia for ur feedback

last thing I would like to add maybe there is a boredom due to the fact that I have seen all kinds of girls (races, shapes,ages) and don’t get me wrong I have had some really memorable moments with some SPs even if I stop completely one day I would never look down on the respectable girls (especially since I supported them). I have a feeling that I have seen it all. In mtl anyways

 

[talkinghead]

I don't now you but you've taken a deep dive into the "demimonde," and it seems to me that taking a break and catching your breath might be a good thing. 600 escorts before you're 30 is a lot. You're still quite young and it sounds like the hobby is what you've known for the last decade. Getting some perspective wouldn't hurt. Personally, I'm not one for self-recriminations, so I wouldn't look back with "regret and ambivalence." If your path ahead is a spiritual one, then see where that leads. In any case, seeing escorts should be fun, not ponderous or confusing. As the Ben and Jerry's ice cream ads put it, if it's not fun, why do it?

 

[Mika xx]

I think loneliness and emptiness is catching up to you. We are social animals, Of course we all crave good companionship.

For me a relationship is get to know each other, accept their qualities and flaws, make compromises and then decide to share a life together despise all that, it takes work. You said you got a few short term “relationship” of a few months. At first mutual attraction is the qualities. It’s normal, we all show our best image when we just meet someone. Then the flaws come in and instead of working on it, you give up. Which is fine, but I dont think you ever experienced a real relationship.

For your case, seeing SW is no different than quick fling here and there, it satisfies your needs in the moment, like an instant gratification. As soon as the “high” pass by, you are back to square one. It is so “easy” to book a SW compared to the work that need to be put into for a long term fulfilling relationship.

28yo is very young, you have a whole life ahead of you to decide what kind of life you want to live. Whatever you are feeling now, that you see as regret or ambivalence can serve as a life lesson. Im very optimistic for your case, I see your reflection as a positive start to something new.

Wish you the best
Mika

 

[minutemenX]

I have been in the hobby for close to 10 years (will be 10 in beginning of January). I have probably seen a few hundred of SPs. I always loved the hobby so much, but for the last 2 months, I have been having some deep regrets. Kind of a born again moment, although I am from Jewish and Arab descent. Can some guys that have had the same feeling share it with us? I have always been anti long term marriage type of guy but I’m starting to consider it with age. Any feedback would be nice.

Maybe you need to experience other aspects of the life which is much more than this hobby. Stop it, get married, have kids, bring them up as decent human beings. Then most probably than not you may divorce and have plenty of escorts in your golden age without feeling guilty about it

 

[Wessex]

It all comes down to what do you want ? Once you know that you'll be alright. Btw great track record !

 

[masterfreak]

C'est impossible de combler un besoin d'amour véritable en voyant des escortes
Le sentiment de vide après plusieurs rencontres chacun des membres ici la sûrement vécus
Développer une vraie relation amoureuse remplie de complicité y a rien de comparable
Ce hobby peut être un piège
Tu glorifies ton ego en multipliant les rendez-vous avec de très jolies travailleuses du sexe
C'est pas un bonheur durable, intense oui mais ça dure pas longtemps
Tous les jeunes hommes de moins de 45 an vous devriez investir votre temps et argent sur de vrai relation interpersonnelle
Ce hobby est une grande illusion
C'est bien agréable de combler des désirs et fantasmes sexuelles mais ça amène un comportement addictif
L'argent n'achète pas du vrai amour et de vrai relation interpersonnelles

 

[Jacobisrael]

C'est impossible de combler un besoin d'amour véritable en voyant des escortes
Le sentiment de vide après plusieurs rencontres chacun des membres ici la sûrement vécus
Développer une vraie relation amoureuse remplie de complicité y a rien de comparable
Ce hobby peut être un piège
Tu glorifies ton ego en multipliant les rendez-vous avec de très jolies travailleuses du sexe
C'est pas un bonheur durable, intense oui mais ça dure pas longtemps
Tous les jeunes hommes de moins de 45 an vous devriez investir votre temps et argent sur de vrai relation interpersonnelle
Ce hobby est une grande illusion
C'est bien agréable de combler des désirs et fantasmes sexuelles mais ça amène un comportement addictif
L'argent n'achète pas du vrai amour et de vrai relation interpersonnelles

I appreciate all of your feedbacks guys feel free to continue posting especially for those with similar experiences. Very much appreciated