Montreal Escorts

Without a condom

bodick7

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Dec 27, 2012
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With all this crap going around, I've been getting tested every 6 weeks (especially since I had a couple condom mishaps recently). As a fat old guy getting tested every 6 weeks, I'm sure my doctor knows what I am up to :cool:

Speaking of which, do any of you tell your doctor you are seeing prostitutes? :p
Yes I did. I wasn’t sure if I was infected.
She didn’t judge me and help me get tested. Very professional.
 
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GreyPilgrim

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I find it particularly interesting how they are considering allowing sex workers to promote their services directly as a means to filter potential clients.

After all, if you can openly discuss what services you consent to provide, it does limit the possibility of frustration and over-reaction from the client during the action. It also provides grounds to protect you should the client voluntarily cross the boundaries you establish beforehand.
 

Anna Bijou

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Sep 25, 2006
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Short answer? Yes, absolutely.

I’ve been hobbying long enough to respect, value and feel protective of anyone who provides this service. Any legislation that could create safer and fairer work conditions for them would have my vote.

I mean… how weird is it that we have clear legislation to oversee the trade of things as potentially dangerous as drugs and alcohol and so little when it comes to something as healthy and necessary as sex?!?


Are you referring to a legalized system or a decriminalized one? Your use of 'legislation' makes it unclear?

Sex workers want full decriminalization, not legalization, which creates a lot of significant issues that don't make it safer for a lot of Sex workers.




 
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Anna Bijou

Natural Friendly Redhead
Sep 25, 2006
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I find it particularly interesting how they are considering allowing sex workers to promote their services directly as a means to filter potential clients.

After all, if you can openly discuss what services you consent to provide, it does limit the possibility of frustration and over-reaction from the client during the action. It also provides grounds to protect you should the client voluntarily cross the boundaries you establish beforehand.


Sure it would be great if it was official but in practice we pretty much do that already in Canada. US swers answering clients questions about specific services know it could be used as evidence. Clients usually know it too. So it's not usually discussed. Clients here, even if they are doing something illegal, ask explicit questions all the time. Swers advertise specific services all the time too. The issue is that if something does go wrong, and pre-established boundaries are crossed, we have no recourse.

Sex workers are probably the most vulnerable to stealthing for that reason. Would I be taken seriously if I reported stealthing by a client? How would I be treated? Is a client stealthing a sex worker going to be considered sexual assault as well and enable sex workers to file a complaint the same way any civilian person can?

The specific condition of renumeration is known by anyone who sees a swer. There's no ambiguity. To me, not following through on this by not paying, in part or in full, is 100% rwithdrawal of my consent. This type of non consent is sexual assault, as this stealthing judgement affirms. Yet I can't do anything about this condition being broken because my consent (or my non consent) is not considered important.


I have been in a situation in the past where I knew that the conditions set on my consent, which were known by both parties, were broken. It 100% felt like sexual assault as a swer, as it would have had it occurred in my personal life. Knowing I could be taken seriously if it had happened in my personal life but that it would never be if I reported as a swer (and could even risk further being retraumatized by being treated horribly if I did try to report), is a feeling I don't wish on anyone.

It is a mix of powerlessness, shame and anger at the realization that in our society only a certain kind of person really deserve the right to safety. Anger because even the same person can be deserving and undeserving of this right, and that it is determined solely by whether money is involved or not. The involvement of money strips me of my basic human right to safety from sexual assault. That's a strong message to receive. And it's one the other person was very aware of and they were certainly emboldened by the knowledge that they could get away with it for that very reason. I'm sure I'm not the only one who has been in this situation.


And it's what I have in mind when I ask if the idea behind recognizing stealthing as assault could eventually be taken further to apply to payment as a condition for consent.. Logically, any condition in any type of situation, money or not, should be viewed the same. But of course, stealthing an Escort should be considered the same as stealthing a civilian. I'm not convinced this even applies to us yet. It would have to be tested and I'm not sure there are many sex workers interested in outing themselves or taking the risk of doing this. The government or Justice system would have to make a clear statement that the judgment applies for sex workers as well. Of course that's not going to happen until full decriminalization.


****Please don't quote this message in its entirety, as I've posted about this before and later decided to remove my personal experience, so id prefer if it wasn't quoted, should I decide to edit it out later. Feel free to quote other parts of my post, though. Thanks.
 

Anna Bijou

Natural Friendly Redhead
Sep 25, 2006
687
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Montreal
www.mademoisellebijou.ca
With all this crap going around, I've been getting tested every 6 weeks (especially since I had a couple condom mishaps recently). As a fat old guy getting tested every 6 weeks, I'm sure my doctor knows what I am up to :cool:

Speaking of which, do any of you tell your doctor you are seeing prostitutes? :p


I think that if you don't feel comfortable telling your doctor that you have multiple partners, you should consider going to a clinic specialized in STI screening. Because there are some infections your family doctor, especially if not aware you have multiple partners, will simply not screen for.

Applies to clients and Sex workers. I absolutely don't feel confident that my family doctor would be non judgemental if I disclosed. So I go to a clinic because without disclosing this, she does not screen for several important infections. (she doesnt screen for syphilis, and while she screens for gonorrhea via blood sample, she doesn't perform swab tests for throat, anus or vagina screening). The clinic doesn't care what I do and they test for it automatically.
 
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bodick7

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bodick7

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Dec 27, 2012
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True. But don't they offer online screening now?
I did it once and they told me they were testing only sex workers…if not, they would charge.
So I had to go by my doc. Easier.
 

bodick7

Well-Known Member
Dec 27, 2012
950
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I absolutely don't feel confident that my family doctor would be non judgemental if I disclosed.
…and betrayed Hypocrat sermen?…
Si ça serait le cas, il n’y aurait pas beaucoup de médecins qui auraient soigné des antivax atteints de la COVID…
 

Anna Bijou

Natural Friendly Redhead
Sep 25, 2006
687
1,140
93
Montreal
www.mademoisellebijou.ca
…and betrayed Hypocrat sermen?…
Si ça serait le cas, il n’y aurait pas beaucoup de médecins qui auraient soigné des antivax atteints de la COVID…



Doctors, like everyone else, have all kinds of biases, whether they explicitly tell you or even recognize it in themselves (implicit bias). It's already known that patients with obesity experience discrimination and that a significant percentage of health professionals. Doctors have been shown to take women's pain less seriously than men's and to spend less time listening to women describe their symptoms than they do with men. It's even worse for black women.





Biases in healthcare link


The word “bias” refers to a negative or positive idea a person has about someone or something. A person’s bias can affect how they interact with people of certain groups.

An implicit bias is a bias that a person is unaware of. A person who has an implicit bias may believe they treat everyone equally. However, the person’s implicit bias may cause unconscious negative associations toward certain groups of people.





The negative attitudes underlying enacted stigma can be explicit or implicit. Explicit attitudes are conscious and reflect a person's opinions or beliefs about a group. Implicit attitudes are automatic and often occur outside of awareness and in contrast to explicitly held beliefs. - from WaPo




“What was most surprising is how clear the signals were in the data,” Markowitz said. “It really paints a picture that bias is not just a one-off phenomenon among certain physicians or individuals. Bias is systemic, subtle and consequential in medicine.”

Markowitz set off by wanting to investigate how biases could appear with some of the most vulnerable populations and aimed his focus on those who are in critical care.

“The evidence suggests bias manifests in how physicians talk about their patients,” he said. “And it's probably not too far of a leap to also suggest it might affect their care as well.”



Doctors' Unconscious Bias Affects Quality Of Health Care Services, Research Shows from npr




There is a growing body of evidence that physicians and other healthcare professionals hold strong negative opinions about people with obesity.






Personally, I have disclosed a few times with both good and bad outcomes. The very first year I started doing sex work I was hospitalized. I disclosed to the emergency doctor (young male) who didn't react and just continued as if it make no difference but he most likely noted in in my file and after a few days, when I was discharged, another Dr, a middle aged woman, brought it up and for some reason started asking me all kinds of irrelevant (to me) questions that were so loaded with judgement and stereotypes.


I was really shocked (my health issue was unrelated to sex work or drugs) but I later concluded she had decided that my abcess was caused by injecting drugs (?) instead of an ingrown hair? Because, of course prostitution = heroine user?? I'm only guessing because she did not say anything to me about why she asked if I used drugs by injection and she thought it was urgent to test me for hiv even after I told her I'd been tested very recently.. It was so inappropriate and ignorant.


I never disclosed again until a few months ago. Mixed reactions. Nurse was amazing, doctor was the absolute worst experience I've ever had, I did not get proper treatment. When I told the nurse at the clinic what had happened, she was really angry about how the doctor had acted with me and flat out told me I didn't receive proper care. So no, doctors aren't superhuman. Some are judgemental pricks, and many may not realize it but implicit bias impacts how patients are treated and the level of care they receive. It's been studied, it's well known. My claims aren't only based on my personal experience.


Why would I disclose to my own family doctor and take the risk? You can't walk back from that one. Once it's out, it's out. Does it make it right? No, of course not. It's a real shame but it is the way it is.


Now that our electronic files are accessed by any health professional, I've had 2 specialists (issues completely unrelated to sex work) comment on how many/often sti screening results were in my file. One was outright rude and clearly judgemental while the other seemed puzzled and commented/asked if they were testing me this much because I had multiple partners (?) to which I obviously didn't answer, and she moved on and without showing any change in her attitude. And those are doctors just thinking I'm a slut, not even that I'm a sex worker.





Sex workers who have disclosed their occupation to health providers have frequently encountered discrimination expressed in a range of ways, including having insensitive and abusive language used toward them, being treated disrespectfully or humiliated in public health care spaces, experiencing physical marginalization within the health care setting, denial of care, and breaches of confidentiality.

Disclosure of sex work to health care providers sometimes results in a lower quality of care. Studies show that health care providers express ambivalence about treating sex workers but do so reluctantly because of their professional ethical obligation to provide nonjudgmental services. Other health care providers outrightly deny care after learning about a patient’s involvement in sex work... study




Sex workers across many geopolitical contexts whose occupation is known often recount inappropriate care from health care providers, including through disrespectful and abusive language, public humiliation, physical separation from other patients, inferior service, inflated charges for private health care services, outright denial of care, and blame when reporting sexual assault. It is within these types of potentially stigmatizing health care settings where only about 10% of the participants in Canada and the UK—both countries with public health care systems—had disclosed their involvement in sex work to health professionals. study






fyi The government's centralized electronic medical file database to which any health professionals, pharmacists etc you see has access to - is set up with (your) consent as the default position. Meaning, no one ever asked us for our consent to keep all of this personal medical information stored, they automatically determined we were consenting.


You can request to withdraw consent if you do not think your endocrinologist needs to know how often you get tested and what the results are because the default is that they have have access to all this information, if they consult your medical profile. I don't believe my family doctor does but I'm not sure. So if that's something you're worried about your family doctor coming across, I'd recommend either withdrawing consent or getting tested anonymously. Just fyi


Note: You can register and have access to some of that information (including who has looked at your file), by registering for access to your Health booklet (through cliqsecur)


So sorry, this was another long one!!!
 
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