First Time with an Incall Escort, I need Advice

[johnybird]

I am new to this escort game, it's my first time with a SP and thankfully for MERB and the people that post I'm confident of the choice I made for my booking this weekend but I have never done this before and I am anxious & a bit nervous, mostly I am nervous about performance anxiety, I have never had sex with someone I didn't have an emotional connection with, I was never a player or had any game always was a bit shy around people I didn't know.

I had a few questions maybe some of you guys can help me out:

- How much time before the appointment is it acceptable to arrive

- Once arrived when and how should I give the donation?

- Even though I will have showered just before the rendez-vous, if they ask me if I want to shower is it rude of me to say I already did.

- Even though I love DATY and always love a BBBJ will the SP get offended if I ask for a CBJ and no DATY, the reviews of the SP i'm seeing always talk about BBBJ and DATY's, Seeing that they have multiple partners, I'd rather be safe and don't want to offend the SP.

- Is a tip expected after the service, if so how much?

- Will I seem like a pig or dirty if I prefer to shower at home after the session rather than in their room (not a germaphobe just prefer to shower at home if I can)

Any advice would be appreciated and I will post my review afterwards to let you know what happened. Thanks guys.

 

[johnybird]

Thanks for the Advice Sharkman.

I wasn't sure which agency to go with so I decided to go with an independent who's had good reviews and who looked like i could click with them.

 

[Halloween Mike]

1) Try to arrive on time, not too in advance indeed. 5-10 mins at best sounds good. Of course its relative to wich type of provider you chose (agency or indy).

2) Depends on who you use again, i would never pay a backpage/annonce 123 provider up front. On the other hand if you do business with a reputed agency, you can give it at the beginning. I don't use much incall but from what i gathered usually the guys leave the envelop on the night table, ladies will usually not take it up front, unless they have any doubts...

3) I would personally refresh... you don't have to take a full shower again, but a refresh is a must to me... Just driving/walking to the location could make you sweat or whatever. Sure its more likely to happen in summer but well... Some provders will prefer if do it anyway... even if you did at home

4) They won't mind doing CBJ... lol. Actually im sure most providers would prefer it. Youll miss on something good tough and honestly the risk with BBJ are minimal, but its your call

5) No its not expected. Depends on your type of session, i get that you won't ask any extras as you seem very vanilla with the CBJ. Not saying tipping should only goes with extra, but to me if extra are included i would feel cheap not tipping.. on the other hand if extras are.... extras... well thats the tip. If no extra are on the menu, i need a VERY VERY stellar session to tip.

6) They don't care what you do after the sesson. If anything they will understand you prefer to shower off the clock once its done, then doing it while your still in your time. I mean there is nothing disgusting if you ride back home without having showered. Your not out of the gym ... lol

Looking forward to your review man, thanks for contributing

 

[jacep]

- How much time before the appointment is it acceptable to arrive
genrally for incall, you only get exact location wen lady is ready. ive tried indys and agencys and it is genrally the same. they either give you the corner or the building/hotel but not the room number before the lady is ready to see you. i normaly arrive 5 minutes before in case lady is ready sooner then shceduled time.

- Once arrived when and how should I give the donation?
i normaly always give donation at begining. i normaly place it on the tabel and fan it out.

- Even though I will have showered just before the rendez-vous, if they ask me if I want to shower is it rude of me to say I already did.
i allways shower before heading to meeting since i see ladys on weekends but if i am seeing lady after work or on day off, i will take a longer shower wile in the room. wen i go into room, i genreally always take a quick shower and just wash privates unless it didnt take shower before showing up in wich case i take a longer shower. i think taking a quick shower makes lady feel more comfortabel.

- Even though I love DATY and always love a BBBJ will the SP get offended if I ask for a CBJ and no DATY, the reviews of the SP i'm seeing always talk about BBBJ and DATY's, Seeing that they have multiple partners, I'd rather be safe and don't want to offend the SP.
ive never had a lady get ofended by not doing daty or asking for cbj. once i cut myself while shaving and even though i wasnt bleeding, i didnt want to risk anything and told lady that i seen many times i wanted cbj this time and she did it. ive also asked for cbj for varius reasons and sometimes ladys that ive seen only do cbj. they wont get offended by cbj requests and would only get ofended if you ask them to do more than they are confortable with and not doing less.

- Is a tip expected after the service, if so how much?
tip isnt expected but obviously they perfer getting one. i genrally have a points system that will determine my tip. if lady has extras genraly if i get the extras, i consider that the tip. if you do decide to tip, never tip at begining and only tip at end just like in restaurant or at haircut you dont tip before you get your food/service or you see what they did to your hair, you shoudnt tip at the begining.

- Will I seem like a pig or dirty if I prefer to shower at home after the session rather than in their room (not a germaphobe just prefer to shower at home if I can)
i dont think they will thik much about it but i might be wrong since ladys will genrally think you dont want to waste your time/money on showering. ive seen some ladys for incall as well as outcall who dont shower and i felt iccky at the end. i normaly feel dirty if i dont shower after. i have cum and saliva on various parts of my body.

 

[rollingstone]

I won't rehash what other people said but I do have the following comments:

- For the donation, at an incall I always remove the envelope from my pocket on arrival and place it in plain view without saying a word or making any reference to it. This enhances the experience and allows you to suspend disbelief, versus asking her where and when she wants it. You say you have done your homework and so I assume you are seeing someone well reviewed.

- I consider showering at an incall to be part of incall ettiquette - I do it even though I showered at home and do not feel like I need to shower again. If you already showered you don't need to be as thorough as you probably were at home, just some time under the water and dry it off. Please consider that having you in the bathroom might give her a chance to do things she does not want to do in front of you, like check the envelope and make sure its all there.

- A tip is by no means expected, and I have never given one in 8 years of hobbying. I have in the past given gifts to exceptional providers I repeated with, but never a cash tip. This is one point where I don't think you should take advice, you should do what feels right to you. I just want to let you know that it is by no means expected. If you are requesting a service that she clearly indicates is an extra (either in her advert or she says so in session) then I do not consider that to be a tip, it is part of her fee. What I am trying to say is that its not like going to a restaurant where etiquette DEMANDS you leave some sort of tip, you tip when you find yourself so happy with your time that you have the urge to do so.

 

[johnybird]

Thank you guys for the very helpful advice, I'm a bit more at ease about the whole thing. I'll be popping my SP Cherry this weekend hope goes better when I popped my own many many years ago!

 

[CharlotteSinclair]

Obviously you want to shower at home. You made that clear. (I am gently teasing - grin).

But let's say near the end you want a shower or freshen up before you leave please do so during your appointment time. The lady may even join you. With incalls there is less flexibility for going over time as the lady may have to leave right away, prepare for another appointment for herself or there is another lady using her place. It is nothing personal - just logistics.

As for the tip they are never expected. At least that has been my experience in Montreal. in other cities it is more customary. If you choose to repeat then gifts from the wishlist are a nice and appreciated gesture. For example, I adore fancy dark chocolates from places like Suite 88 or a gift certificate to Scandinave if it is my birthday.

 

[blkone]

1. Maybe 5 minutes, not too much.

2. In an envelope (unsealed) and directly to the girl, or table if she directs you to one.

3. No. Unless you somehow got smelly since that time (bathroom etc). If you're clean, you're not going to get much more clean.

4. Nope. No offense if you ask for a CBJ instead and no DATY.

5. Not usually expected and you only give a tip for exceptional service. Don't start tipping for no reason!

6. No you can shower wherever you want. -Also if it's incall you have to make sure the shower is part of your time.

 

[johnybird]

Thanks for everyone's help everything went smoothly...well kinda just posted my review here:
http://merb.cc/vbulletin/showthread.php?119543-Amber-on-Backpage-6559&highlight=6559

Thinking back it's kind of funny at all the preparations I went through being the first time I was meeting an SP.

• I got a pedicure for the first time ever a few days before, had to get those hammer toes fixed.
• I showered like I never showered before, it was like scrubbing down a circus elephant, no crack or crevice was left untouched (ok maybe that's TMI)
• I had packed my backpack with moist towelettes so I could freshen up once I got there
• Packed an extra pair of underwear... why?... I'm still trying to figure that one out
• Completely forgot about the envelope until she asked me (how embarrassing)
• CBJ? what CBJ, I completely forgot to bring it up

Well I guess I popped my cherry

 

[rollingstone]

We all had our first time snafus. I may have not gotten a pedicure, but i did shave my chest. It broke out into an allergic reaction or rash and looked much worse than with the hair there. I told the lady about it at the beginning of the meeting and she laughed and rubbed cocoa butter all over it, and everything was great from there.

 

[Halloween Mike]

I always bring an extra pair of underwear personally. I mean when i wake up i put clean ones after shower, but when i re-shower at my hotel i dunno... i want my underwear to be ultra clean when i take down my pants. Then again im like that, i want to make sure there is no odor what so ever...

As for the envelope, well for a first timer its no biggie, sure she understood. When your nervous and you never did that, you have other stuff in mind. Happened to me too once i forgot to gave her the money at the end, at that time i didn't put it on display, dunno, i was used to just full out my wallet and pay at the end... so she asked me nicely before leaving i said "oh yes yes sorry, my mind was still elsewhere, had a blast lol" and she took it as a compliment. Easy to spot somebody that just forget about it than somebody who does not intend to pay.

BTW Just saw you took a girl from backpage... wow you lucky it got super smooth and all... you took a big risk man for a first time... I know she was reviewed so it dismish a bit the risk, but still, you would think a first timer would get in the safer zone lol. Anyway glad for you it worked out well despite the little problem you had.

 

[johnybird]

I always bring an extra pair of underwear personally. I mean when i wake up i put clean ones after shower, but when i re-shower at my hotel i dunno... i want my underwear to be ultra clean when i take down my pants. Then again im like that, i want to make sure there is no odor what so ever...

As for the envelope, well for a first timer its no biggie, sure she understood. When your nervous and you never did that, you have other stuff in mind. Happened to me too once i forgot to gave her the money at the end, at that time i didn't put it on display, dunno, i was used to just full out my wallet and pay at the end... so she asked me nicely before leaving i said "oh yes yes sorry, my mind was still elsewhere, had a blast lol" and she took it as a compliment. Easy to spot somebody that just forget about it than somebody who does not intend to pay.

BTW Just saw you took a girl from backpage... wow you lucky it got super smooth and all... you took a big risk man for a first time... I know she was reviewed so it dismish a bit the risk, but still, you would think a first timer would get in the safer zone lol. Anyway glad for you it worked out well despite the little problem you had.

Thanks Mike,

I did my research before I booked anything, she's been reviewed elsewhere and her personality appealed to me and considering how it went I definitly made the right choice. When I think i'm ready again I think I will try an agency that offers incall service. But I will surely see Amber again.

I agree with you on the underwear thing, I had literally got dressed and left right away, I even had my seat set on cool in the car lol! I would have changed if I had any doubt.

Thanks again for your advice and feedback.