Long term arrangements

[rumpleforeskiin]

I have no reason to use SA, do not need to buy a friend or long term fuck buddy. Just my opinion.

Of course you don't. Guys who book 30 minute sessions, as you've posted you prefer, are only looking for receptacles for their seed, not intimate companionship. Have you considered a fleshlight? They're a lot cheaper, give the same results. Plus you can use them again and don't need a condom. I have one myself and when I want to "bust a nut," which seems to be the only use you have for a woman, it comes in quite handy.

I've talked about my relationship before, but I'll rehash since it's been a while. For the first year, we met once a week for sex (though we wound up meeting more often than that for concerts, dinner, and the like) and I gave her 400$ each time we had sex, while I just picked up the tab for the other meetings.

After a bit more than a year, we ramped it up to 2800$ per month with meetings for sex twice weekly, which works out to about 325$ per meeting. We see each other 3-4 times a week in all and have, as you (except, of course, for Sol) can imagine, have become quite close. We've traveled extensively, a trip to Berlin and Prague, a long weekend in NYC, a trip to Halifax and Cape Breton in the wake of seeing the movie Maudie, a trip to Hawaii (Kauai and Big Island). We're off to London and Amsterdam next month and I bought her a travel bicycle to match my own so we can tour these fabulous cities on wheels.

Fortunately, our musical tastes match and we've been to any number of concerts: Feist, Jackson Browne, Amidou and Mariam, Jeff Tweedy, First Aid Kit. We have tickets to see Bruce Springsteen on Broadway in August.

The wealth redistribution I share with her pretty much matches my social security check, money I didn't have before and don't really miss now. I also like knowing that she's comfortable as she builds her alternative medical practice. She regularly expresses her gratitude for my generosity.

 

[Sol Tee Nutz]

Of course you don't. Guys who book 30 minute sessions, as you've posted you prefer, are only looking for receptacles for their seed, not intimate companionship. .

Correct, when I book an escort I am not looking for intimate companionship, I am looking to get laid. I do not live on a fantasy world where I assume that by paying for sex that it is intimate, that she wants to be with me, my feet are firmly planted, no fairy tales in my head. If I wanted intimate companionship I would not be wanting to pay for it, is that so hard for you to figure out? There are many of us out there who feel the same way, we see reality and prefer to keep ot that way. Keep on living in your dream world of thinking this paid for intimate companion has real feelings for you ( tell her you and not pay for her friendship anymore and see what happens ).
I am out west a lot now, I have met a couple of ladies I can take out to dinners for free, they do not need to be paid to go on a ttip with me or dinners, in my mind that is intimate, not having go pay someone to pretend to be my friend. Sad you can not see the difference, especially at your age.
Escorts are great, they do their jobs well.

 

[EagerBeaver]

STN,

Some of us value and are willing to pay for companionship of a woman that goes beyond “be a 30 minute receptacle for my cum.” You probably shouldn’t be in this thread if your only contribution is to say “not for me.” Who cares? The people in this thread are the ones who say it is for me. Although my actual preference isn’t for ultra long arrangements but those that last at least for a few months. 30 minutes does not qualify.

Also, women are not pretending to be your friend when they meet you for lunch after the arrangement is over, for no compensation. I have made plenty of friends on that site. Who are ex arrangements.

 

[Sol Tee Nutz]

I think the 30 min is a little embellished.
If you read the post above mine the question was asked. Far too many in this group do not like to hear others opinions if it does not fall in line with theirs, seem to be a sheltered group whose feelings get hurt very easily, and they are even old men not kids. You as a lawyer should know that there is more than opinion, why can not someone give their opinion on a topic for or against.
This is not the Stepford clan where all are to be programed to be the same, some of us are individuals who have our own opinions.
I am on a car race forum, mostly with younger people, topics are mostly cars but some politics, I give my opinion on topics which some do not agree with, never have I been called to be banned, never has it been said you posts are hate porn like here, and these are from younger people who are not butt hurt when someone has a dufferent opinion. Some old people here really need to grow up, probably 75% of the population to not agree with the thoughts of the majority here about escorts, probably 50% plus of the entire Canadian population does not agree with the Liberal views here. Perhaps some of you should start a Liberal/Socialist only board and your feelings will not be hurt. You all preach freedom of speech and diversify, I call BS.
Back to SA, not for me and I gave my reasons why.

 

[EagerBeaver]

An opinion such as yours however doesn’t do anything for this thread. The conclusions you have drawn are also inaccurate for many who are on SA and doing platonic dating for free. It’s a dating website and provides a way to exchange messages and pics. A lot of people meet on SA and do other deals off website:

Pics and videos for money
Sex for money
Arm candy/social companionship
Massages

To draw any conclusions or pigeonhole the website or its users isn’t opinion, it’s inaccurate speculation over something you haven’t used or experienced. Therefore your posts here are not helpful or insightful.

It’s equivalent to someone coming on MERB and saying “MERB sucks and you all are sinners.” Is it Stepford Wives to delete such a post? The Mods would delete such a post. Your posts here are the functional equivalent.

 

[Sol Tee Nutz]

You do not have to experience something to have an opinion, I know through experience and basic knowledge that paying for friendship is not for me, even if sex is given after. For those who see escorts as fun sex great but for those like Rumples who has fallen in love with his paid for friend, reality or fiction.

 

[rumpleforeskiin]

You probably shouldn’t be in this thread if your only contribution is to say “not for me.” Who cares? The people in this thread are the ones who say it is for me.

No, no, Beav. I'm glad he's here. I'm glad he knows so much about something that he's never experienced and that he's happy to school the rest of us who happen to have theses experiences. I just adore people who know so much about things totally out of their purview. I'm glad that we have Sol, who absolutely knows that she has no feelings for me. I'm sure she's shared that with him many times so he must be right. Without him, we might just lose track of ourselves.

You and I are both enjoying what we're doing, be it short or long term. My arrangement is nearing two years and we're both committed in the long term. We happen to click magnificently and we happen to make each other's lives immeasurably richer. It's wonderful.

 

[rumpleforeskiin]

You do not have to experience something to have an opinion.

Opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one. Some, apparently, have more than one and in more than one place.:bounce:

I might add that, while you're welcome to express an opinion on something you know absolutely nothing about, your chances of making a fool of your self is pretty damn near 100%.

 

[rumpleforeskiin]

Your disagreements make it even more interesting to contemplate how Rumpleforeskiin's highly educated Sugar Baby might feel about sharing the SA platform with the quintessential former Backpage providers who might try and start using SA.

A couple of things here.

1. I was lucky to meet her when I did. A month later, she'd have been gone having heard about enough bad experiences friends of hers had had on the site.

2. As Beav has pointed out numerous times, SA is all over the place. Starving artists looking for a way to continue their lifestyle, students looking for extra income, and certainly hookers galore. When I was active, I would often get messages that said no more than hello. It didn't take a serious deconstruction of their profiles to ascertain that they were working girls using SA as they would Backpage or Annonces123. I would think now that the people running SA are going to have to keep a watchful eye over the girls profiles as they try to stay on the "right" side of the law.

Update: just looked at SA for the first time in ages. You now find a list of check-boxes you have to check off before gaining access. 1. Be respectful 2. This is a dating site. Do not come here looking only for sex. 3. No pay-per-meet. SA is about real relationships. 4. No on-line only.

 

[EagerBeaver]

The attempts by people who haven’t ever been on SA to try and characterize it or draw conclusions about it are comical and not at all reality based.

Patron, there will be no major influx of Backpage providers because despite your attempts to insult their intelligence, they actually have heard of it and already have accounts on SA. A lot of ladies register an account and are not active. That’s permitted. But to suggest that a vast army of low end providers never heard of SA until yesterday is an objectively bizarre belief. I would strongly suggest you go on there and scan SB profiles for cities like Hartford, Waterbury and Providence. It’s overwhelmingly low end, minority providers, many of whom are on BP. This vast influx you are talking about (1) isn’t going to happen, and (2) even if it did, by a 10 second judicious use of the search function filters, you would never even see them!!!!!! and (3) for the BP guys or high end cheapos who want to contact that sector, those girls were always there and reachable if they sucked it up and paid the monthly fee to message them.

I have no idea what disagreement you are talking about. Everything is on SA, if you search for it.

Patron you have put up MANY great posts on this board but the last few are not exactly destined for the Patron Post Hall of Fame.

 

[EagerBeaver]

Rumps, those disclaimers are because the women on SA complain about all the messages they get from guys looking for one night stands in a hotel. SBs don’t like being “hookerized”, even if they will agree to a PFP after a few dates. Pay per meet is on the table with most ladies but the average college girl on there doesn’t like it when they get an intro message that says, “how much for sex at the Hartford Marriott?” If they have complained to me about other guys doing this they sure did to SA. SA wants SB inventory - not girls deleting their accounts because they have been hookerized. Rule #1 is never “hookerize” an SA girl (unless she clearly is a pro from her profile). Yes some of them will have sex for money on the 3rd date but they dismiss that as prostitution in their heads. All of them. Whether such logic is valid is irrelevant to the objective at hand and I never ever challenged that particular ideology. You just do what you gotta do to move things along. It’s no different than real life dating in the end, which isn’t free either and both sides have similar if not identical objectives. SA just a little more transparent on the economics.

 

[minutemenX]

I can see the attractiveness of SA. With the SA you move, as Rumple said, from extreme “glory hole” style sex to more “human” interaction. But nothing comes free. You develop feelings, attachments, and RESPONSIBILITIES. What happens if she got sick, has accident etc.? You just damp her? What happens when in the middle of your “highly pleasurable relationship” she decides to damp you for the “real” guy? If someone can manage to stay in “not so deep but pleasurable” relationship and put the limit to his responsibility and feelings than good for him. But this is not for everybody.

 

[Kinky Cinderella]

Hell'ooo gentlemen,

Out of curosity; I registered on SA...

I can confirm about the messages ladies are getting on SA, I see it as a 2nd MERB, this is sad/hard to select the good from the bad ones so I haven't seen someone so far as I am taking my time..but for now, I do not see much of longterm possibilities coming from this website...on 100 messages, I am exchanging with rare and selected few gentlemen only...

 

[rumpleforeskiin]

But nothing comes free. You develop feelings, attachments, and RESPONSIBILITIES. What happens if she got sick, has accident etc.? You just damp her? What happens when in the middle of your “highly pleasurable relationship” she decides to damp you for the “real” guy?

I suppose everyone has different answers to this one.

No nothing comes free, but my girl is certainly less expensive than a stay-at-home wife, with none of the downsides. She is openly pan-sexual and polyamorous, so there is and will be no other guy (or girl) more real than me. When we're together, life is wonderful. When we're not, we're both free agents. I don't see many escorts these days, due primarily to financial concerns, but every once in a while I do feel like someone different and it's ok. What she does with other people is not my business. I just don't want to hear about it. She does know about one escort I've seen, primarily because we've spoken about bringing her in for a threesome.

And, in our case, you're absolutely right about feelings, attachments and responsibilities. We've both made life decisions that are affected by our relationship. Despite the protestations of the all-knowing Sol T Nutz, we have become key figures in each other's lives.

 

[EagerBeaver]

I What happens if she got sick, has accident etc.? You just damp her? What happens when in the middle of your “highly pleasurable relationship” she decides to damp you for the “real” guy? If someone can manage to stay in “not so deep but pleasurable” relationship and put the limit to his responsibility and feelings than good for him. But this is not for everybody.

If you are a short term arrangement guy none of these things are issues. It’s a business transaction and arrangements all end, in my case more often due to girl graduating and getting full time job or graduating and moving back to where she came from. Non-morons go into an arrangement understanding stuff like this happens and it’s not gonna last. You accept it up front. Or don’t do it.

I have had to end arrangements as well, in one case because the lady, after around 4 dates and having sex twice, became very possessory. She asked me to co-sign a condo lease, started trying to renegotiate the arrangement thinking she had me wrapped around her finger. She was just way too controlling. I saw red flags with her from day 1 but ignored them due to her being smoking hot. It really pained me because her BBBJ was incredible and I haven’t had anyone who could suck my dick like she could ever since, but the baggage she brought to the arrangement was just way too much to tolerate as a tradeoff for superb BBBJ skills. She was a little unbalanced mentally and ultimately her instability scared me.

She was 29 years of age - oldest of any of the SA girls I saw, and I learned quickly the younger ones are more naive, less mercenary and often don’t know the value of their asses, in that venue, especially the newer ones.

 

[rumpleforeskiin]

Non-morons go into an arrangement understanding stuff like this happens and it’s not gonna last. You accept it up front. Or don’t do it.

In point of fact, Beav, nothing lasts. In the end, we're all doomed. Even Babe Ruth didn't live forever. (Speaking of the Babe, he never managed the incredible feat of two Platinum Sombreros in the same season. In fact, only one player in the modern era has ever managed two Platinum Sombreros in the same season and he did it in one homestand.) But back on topic.

Two years into my current relationship, I'd say the odds of it lasting longer than two of my marriages is pretty close to 100%. The odds of my living long enough to have it last longer than that doomed affair is probably about 50%.

 

[CaptRenault]

...She does know about one escort I've seen, primarily because we've spoken about bringing her in for a threesome.

This is like discovering plutonium...by accident!

 

[CaptRenault]

I can confirm about the messages ladies are getting on SA, I see it as a 2nd MERB, this is sad/hard to select the good from the bad ones so I haven't seen someone so far as I am taking my time..but for now, I do not see much of longterm possibilities coming from this website...on 100 messages, I am exchanging with rare and selected few gentlemen only...

Good point Alyssa. When I talked with my Latina Single Mom Sugar Baby (LSMSB) about her experiences on SA, she told me a couple times that she has received a lot of disrespectful, rude and egotistical messages from guys who have contacted her. Furthermore she said she met with some guys who turned her off immediately with their behavior and bad attitude. Such guys got nowhere with her.

So that works in favor of a guys who treat the the women on SA with respect. Many of the SA women are relatively inexperienced in paid relationships and they are very concerned about discretion, safety and being treated respectfully. Of course escorts want the same thing from clients but escorts don't always get to pick their clients like a woman on SA can. Escorts appreciate the nice guy type but sugar babies probably appreciate them even more.

 

[eviltmp]

Just catching to the thread and my mind is blown by some of the things and statements made here. Not going to pretend to be some authority or guru but some guys on here need a serious adjustment. Falling in love with an SP or SB is not doing yourself any favour.

As others have pointed out there is not one Sugar bowl but many, many different flavors. From scammers, to hardened cynical mercenaries, to regular working SPs, to attention seekers that will never meet anyone, to shy college girls, and a few in-between. All these have different wants and different dynamics. Just like guys have very different ways of approaching girls and how they will be successful with various groups. As you can imagine guys saying "I will provide you $xx for 1-2 hours of intimate fun" don't do well with the non-pros.

My only interest is in college girls with daddy issues that actually get excited at spending time with a fun older guy. You need to meet over coffee first to see how well you get along but my rule of thumb is whatever she needs above $100-200 per meet (multi-hours) is what she needs to hold her nose to hang out with you. The more you have to pay, the less she likes you and the less interesting the main event will be. And just to clarify, this also applies to total stunners (10/10 girls and an actual 5'11" model, girls that are getting dozens and dozens of messages). Is it time-consuming? You have no idea. Are you going to see a lot of dead-ends? Expect it. Are there true gems? Yes, a very small handful.

Seriously, if you're spending 300-400 per meet she better be a 20 y.o. 100 lbs blue eyed hotti and not some mom a few decades past her best days. But then again, what do I know? Some guys are thrilled that a girl is just talking to them.

 

[rumpleforeskiin]

Falling in love with an SP or SB is not doing yourself any favour.

Just curious here. To make such a statement, you must be an expert on the subject. Please share with us how you gathered your expertise?

Seriously, if you're spending 300-400 per meet she better be a 20 y.o. 100 lbs blue eyed hotti and not some mom a few decades past her best days.

Spend 300-400 on someone with very limited experience in bed? Pray tell, why? Personally, I prefer a woman who knows what she's doing with a man.

My only interest is in college girls with daddy issues that actually get excited at spending time with a fun older guy.

I sincerely hope you're kidding. Personally, I prefer well-adjusted younger women who have been around the block a few times. Ideal age 28-34. My sweetie is 32. I do agree with you however when you state, "some guys on here need a serious adjustment."