Question for the ladies

[johnybird]

I've only been doing this for a few months and was curious about something. I apologize if this question was posted before but I did a search and couldn't find anything.

How nervous are you the when you meet someone for the first time not knowing who they are and what to expect?

I'm not talking about the way they look, more for a safety issue, you are sometimes are welcoming these strangers into your place or going over to their place. What kind of precautions do you take, if any, to ensure that you will be as safe as possible?

This question again is for the ladies out there, not for the Merbiholics that go see them.

 

[Lily from Montreal]

Similar precaution here,except the checking for suspicious bag,didn't cross my mind but when I meet a new gentleman I tell a friend when,where and how long the meeting is supposed to be and I text that friend when I arrive in the room to say all is well ,and I text after when I am done,with a 30 min cushion because I am often forgetting the time, I am bad with clock...If it is a repeat I will skip the in the room text but still follow the pre and after step...

 

[BookerL]

Hi Lily,
I agree, the "suspicious bag check up" thing might look a bit too much... but I think I might have been traumatized by an episode of that US tv show "How to catch a predator" they made me watch in high school

hello Tina

Better safe then sorry

I have a few anecdotes about checking rooms .
It was a Saturday morning had booked one of my little lovelies at the Excel in St-Leonard ,the guy was about 22 years old he wanted a real 18 to 19 years old which I had on board ,her shift was completed but she wanted to do the call anyways .
The guy seemed a bit incoherent talking either tired of partying all night or close to drunk ?
I told my girl I would go up with her ,she asked me why ,I was not quiet satisfied with the answers the client gave .
In the room they where 7 guys and thought they would have a free show or free something else .

Anything can happen in this business a good booker should care about the safety of is ladies !




Cheers


Booker

 

[Anabella]

It is important to follow your instinct, this alone can be helpfull, and having somebody know where you are, for how long, especially for a new client, is always better. Also i have this "no private residence" rule for new clients because it is safer (in my own opinion) in a "public" place like a motel/hotel. Not to mention going the extra mile to pay the room also give me a feeling of maybe not safety, but assurance if i can say.

xxxx

Anabella

 

[AmberRose]

Agree with all the ladies, they pretty much summed it up! Also Booker's situation is terrifying, but it happens. I've had a gentleman call once, and I could hear male voices in the background, and when I asked him about it, he admitted he had five of his buddies over.

It's always nerve-wracking, we're usually in very vulnerable positions when seeing gentlemen, and you never know who's going to be on the outside of the door.
Like Anabella, I have a rule of not doing outcalls to private residences for a first meeting, since you never know who or what they might have hiding in their home, and I've had too many bad encounters with men I didn't know in their homes to be comfortable with it. With a hotel, you can usually verify that the person you're seeing is who they say they are, and you also know(for the most part) that if they're at a pretty nice hotel and they try anything, people will notice if you cause a scene.

I find incalls to be best for first meetings, since I know my surroundings, and will know right away if something is off. The whole "suspicious bag" thing is actually something you need to keep an eye out for, since men will sometimes try and hide video cameras in bags(it happens more often then you think)

Most of the time I'm not very nervous before a meeting. I've usually communicated a fair amount with the gentleman ahead of time to get a sense of what they're like, and if no red flags are given off, I usually feel perfectly comfortable before a meeting
I do get a bit nervous sometimes, and I'm sure most of the ladies always have a little escape plan in their head in case anything should go wrong, but usually once they're in and settled and you've started talking, then I feel very much at ease!

 

[johnybird]

I'm getting nervous for you ladies just reading the responses.

Have any of you bailed on a client because you felt that something was off or not right?

 

[Maria Divina]

Hello Johnybird

Of course, the recommandations by others ladies are simplifying the things, but without that, I can have a good idea about someone by taking the time to exchange by emails a bit..... and just by the way someone is writting and the details who are composing his email, are giving a very good indication.
After that, I am asking to call him before to meet him. Yes, I am taking a phone rendez-vous, and that's me who will be calling you, at the time we had agreed together. That's important for me to hear the voice, to have a better idea on the gentleman, but also, to be sure to not meet someone I would know in my personnal life, and that few minutes on the phone are breaking the ice, I adore that.

With this way to proceed, I met extremely rarely someone who is dull. I met just a couple of less respectful gentlemen, and that's been now a bit over 7 years than I am independant.

In fact we are all, gentlemen & ladies here, looking for the same thing: to meet someone free of problem, and have a fun, sane & safe encounter in good company.

 

[johnybird]

Thanks for the Insight Maria,

Thankfully there are more good people in this world then bad

I've booked with some of you lovely ladies for the first time just with a couple text messages that's why I was curious, Just with the date, time and how long, obviously i'm polite but I never had any email exchanges or text exchanges with them. I can understand speaking with someone on the phone might give you a better sense of what the person is like though.

I've been told by a couple of people that I look a bit intimidating if they didn't know me, I personally don't see it and i'm at the complete other end of the spectrum of intimidating.
Maybe at my next booking i'll ask if they found me intimidating when they saw me or what put them at ease, after the meeting though during small talk, don't want to freak her out lol!

 

[AmberRose]

Johnny to answer your last question, I certainly have bailed on men before if something felt. Luckily working as an independent, I haven't had any issues with the men I've met, they've all been lovely gentlemen! But when working for an agency(and not all of them are the same)..well let's just say they don't care who they send to you. I've had to leave an outcall once because as soon as the door closed behind me, he became very intimidating and aggressive, and admitted he had no money on him. I've also had to ask a few men to leave incalls at the agency too, when they became quite aggressive or gave off some bad vibes.

It's a pretty rare occurrence though, I find 90% of men are nice and respectful for the most part, which is why I don't find I worry too much when meeting new people.

Also, johnny you certainly don't look intimidating at all! You have a friendly face and don't come off as someone to be concerned about

 

[johnybird]

I've had to leave an outcall once because as soon as the door closed behind me, he became very intimidating and aggressive, and admitted he had no money on him. I've also had to ask a few men to leave incalls at the agency too, when they became quite aggressive or gave off some bad vibes.

How do you get out of a situation like that without setting the guy off. I would imagine an incall at an agency would feel safer since there are people all around.

Also, johnny you certainly don't look intimidating at all! You have a friendly face and don't come off as someone to be concerned about

Thanks AmberRose, come to think of it the couple of times that comment was made I was wearing a hoodie so that could have been the culprit

 

[johnybird]

Hi Lily,
I agree, the "suspicious bag check up" thing might look a bit too much... but I think I might have been traumatized by an episode of that US tv show "How to catch a predator" they made me watch in high school

I don't think it's too much Tina, I didn't even think about it before you mentioned it. It's very easy to set up a camera to record in a bag without you knowing, not that I have experience with that I've seen "How to catch a predator" as well.
Never can be too safe

 

[johnybird]

I am referring to an episode which (from what i remember) had this guy being set up bringing a bag full of ropes, handcuffs, duct tape and other stuff on a meeting with a 12-13 year old found online.
Pretty disturbing.
I didn't like having to watch this show at high school, it was making me feel so uncomfortable and still is, I was 13 at that time and very chocked... but in a way, I was old enough to see what reality is about.

Oh ya forgot about that! Ya that IS pretty disturbing. Watching that would freak me out as an adult let alone a 13 year old. Pretty sick people out there.