Ask us anything part 3

[Lunaseraphim]

Don't know if this as been asked before (probably considering the number of pages ), but i'll ask anyway: from your experience, ladies, what's the ratio between MERB members and not in your clients?
I understand you don't systematicaly ask the question so i know it will be an approximation.
I'm asking the question cause i often notice that there's a gap between the availability of certain ladies and the number reviews of said ladies here.
Some people always assume that merbites "hide" some ladies by not reviewing their experience, that may be so; but another reason could also be that there's a good number of clients who simply don't come here.
(Of course there are also lurkers )

I've only been an active member of the forum for a year but I've noticed a couple of things. I think a lot of clients have a merb account but they don't use it. There are more lurkers than active users here.. and I don't think members are trying to ''hide'' someone by not reviewing her lol. I think a lot of guys don't have the time or the energy to write a review. A lot of men have told me they really don't like writing reviews also, because it's something intimate they don't really want to share, even if they did check the reviews to begin with. This is something that's hard to accept for die hard fans of this forum but the truth is that most clients don't write reviews or participate in this ''community''. American clients often don't read reviews at all.

For me it fluctuates. Lately I'd say only 20% of my clients find me on Merb, but at other times of the year it's more like 35% or even 50%. These people don't necessarily have an active account, either.. Sometimes they just have 10 posts. One advantage of Merb for me is that I can interact with clients and a lot of people actually do like my comments and replies, but I've noticed that the lounge section of the forum seems to be less active than it used to be, and the members who are present the most often fluctuate a lot. Last summer and last fall the atmosphere was a lot lighter but recently things have been feeling really negative which is not really something I thrive on.

 

[philonius]

I think a lot of clients have a merb account but they don't use it. There are more lurkers than active users here.. and I don't think members are trying to ''hide'' someone by not reviewing her lol.

I was this way up until recently. Had an account just to see if someone was legit or if anyone had a major (not preferential) issue with a provider.
I also never used to write reviews bc I was too busy with work, I used my experiences to write erotica in my free time, and honestly I just didn't want to put a great provider on blast thinking it would somehow restrict my ability to see them (stupid, I know, but the dick is a jealous bitch).
One time I told a provider I had an amazing time and they asked if I could write a review (on terb I think) and I posted it and people seemed to really like it and she said it helped her a lot so now I'm amenable to the idea (if I feel we both enjoyed ourselves). Then some drama about a month ago brought me into The Lounge and now I regret all my previous life decisions

 

[Lunaseraphim]

I was this way up until recently. Had an account just to see if someone was legit or if anyone had a major (not preferential) issue with a provider.
I also never used to write reviews bc I was too busy with work, I used my experiences to write erotica in my free time, and honestly I just didn't want to put a great provider on blast thinking it would somehow restrict my ability to see them (stupid, I know, but the dick is a jealous bitch).
One time I told a provider I had an amazing time and they asked if I could write a review (on terb I think) and I posted it and people seemed to really like it and she said it helped her a lot so now I'm amenable to the idea (if I feel we both enjoyed ourselves). Then some drama about a month ago brought me into The Lounge and now I regret all my previous life decisions

I think clients who had a good experience and who know a provider allows reviews are making a mistake by withholding. You are just encouraging the person's business when doing this. I've had a lot of positive reviews and I don't have issues finding clients, but I am by no means living like a princess lol. No matter what, a SP will never be everyone's cup of tea. There are also providers I know who have been indies for years and barely have any review or have a NRP, and they are booked and busy. On one hand I think the importance of reviews is exaggerated, but on the other hand I think they can have a major impact on the SP's business and cause a lot of drama, so it definitely helps to have as many good reviews as possible..

 

[jeffmathers]

Don't know if this as been asked before (probably considering the number of pages ), but i'll ask anyway: from your experience, ladies, what's the ratio between MERB members and not in your clients?
I understand you don't systematicaly ask the question so i know it will be an approximation.
I'm asking the question cause i often notice that there's a gap between the availability of certain ladies and the number reviews of said ladies here.
Some people always assume that merbites "hide" some ladies by not reviewing their experience, that may be so; but another reason could also be that there's a good number of clients who simply don't come here.
(Of course there are also lurkers )

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[Rebaynia]

Don't know if this as been asked before (probably considering the number of pages ), but i'll ask anyway: from your experience, ladies, what's the ratio between MERB members and not in your clients?
I understand you don't systematicaly ask the question so i know it will be an approximation.
I'm asking the question cause i often notice that there's a gap between the availability of certain ladies and the number reviews of said ladies here.
Some people always assume that merbites "hide" some ladies by not reviewing their experience, that may be so; but another reason could also be that there's a good number of clients who simply don't come here.
(Of course there are also lurkers )

I don't really know about any ratio.
I've seen merb members before. Don't know who they are on merb for the most part.

I only know of 1 for sure. Everyone I met, I enjoyed my time with, and am sure they did too. Haven't had any reviews written, but I'm alright with that.

The fact that it's been almost 3 years, and there are no negative reviews, and I have only started to be a supporting member, so imagined being an active participating member, not supporting, that if someone did write a good review, might just be shut down anyway. If it was bad it would have stayed for sure.

But those I clocked as merb members, or they told me after, admitted they found the reviewing, dehumanizing, and didn't like to participate in sharing for that reason.

Who knows could be I was bad, but sweet enough they didn't want me to feel negative after. (Not likely from what I have seen in the reviews, but never know. Could be a reason.)

Also I'm not exactly thin. Could be not wanting to be known for liking a bigger person, and there's really no nice way to review a bigger size without it sounding like a jab at attraction. Even for those who like it, there isn't positively charged terms to make it sound desirable, but is something that would likely come up in followup questions, that even a well intentioned review could turn into a fat-phobic thread.

I choose to see it as a positive, no bad news is good news, especially when the day my account was started here, was the day I started being available as a provider. Oct. 2022

 

[LC18]

Are you ok with restaurants asking for your credit card numbers to book a table?

 

[LeDodo]

Are you ok with restaurants asking for your credit card numbers to book a table?

No issues with that. If you book from OpenTable it's rather common. Some even have no show policy to charge penalty. If I'm going to there I don't mind leaving it.
If I'm going to just book everywhere and at the last minute then I might be worried ...

 

[Rebaynia]

Are you ok with restaurants asking for your credit card numbers to book a table?

No.
I guess I understand the concept, but I don't think I have been, or would be comfortable going to, a place high end enough to require a card number to book a table.

Delicious food can be found at places that don't need this type of requirement.

Sounds like the type of place I would wait for a work holiday party to be held at to expierience. When it's the boss who's paying. (Only time I've ever been to places like that.)

 

[philonius]

Are you ok with restaurants asking for your credit card numbers to book a table?

This is a thing?! Weird. Because they charge a no-show fee?

 

[2fast2slow]

Are you ok with restaurants asking for your credit card numbers to book a table?

it depends on the restaurant

 

[LeDodo]

This is a thing?! Weird. Because they charge a no-show fee?

Some yes.

 

[LC18]

This is a thing?! Weird. Because they charge a no-show fee?

I’ve only had 2 places asked me for a credit card to book but yes I guess they too suffer from last minute cancellations or no shows

 

[philonius]

I've used my credit card to make reservations at spas and beauty salons because they get too many cancellations. It's annoying but that's how things are now. If I miss a therapist appointment I have to pay for it..

I have to send a deposit to my hairdresser as well. A lot of people here call SP scammers because they ask for deposits and advise against sending one but the truth is nowadays most freelance workers require deposits..

I don't ask for deposits personally but I get cancellations and during the slow season it can be annoying.

Oh I understand it, just didn’t think it was such a big issue for a restaurant as to warrant it. Makes sense, just seems a bit much.
For the record, I’ve never had an issue with deposits and never been scammed before but I’m not looking for the ‘best deal’ (ie. taking a chance on rando LL posts) and not concerned about the risk of losing a nominal sum so this doesn’t affect me.
So yeah, take my credit card for a resevation I’M NOT SEEING ANYONE THAT REQUIRES A DEPOSIT/SCREENING, THATS HOWNTHEYNGGETYOU!!!1111

Oof, sorry, what was that?! I’ve been here too long, I think…

 

[sigui01]

What’s your favourite show on Apple TV+ ?

Slow Horses And Ted Lasso

 

[themonk83]

This is a thing?! Weird. Because they charge a no-show fee?

Government now allows restaurants to charge, if they want, $10 per person if you no show

 

[Boumbo]

To fellow SPs, how open are you about your personal life (friends, family, projects, childhood etc) with clients?

 

[Lunaseraphim]

To fellow SPs, how open are you about your personal life (friends, family, projects, childhood etc) with clients?

It depends which client and what type of information. I do like to talk about my friends and positive aspects of my childhood, my interests and hobbies, etc. There are certain things I don't talk about with clients however, particularly if I know they are in contact with other clients and see many providers in Montreal. It doesn't mean that I don't like these clients, but people gossip even if there isn't malicious intent behind it.. There are some clients I've opened up to more, tho.

 

[Giselle Montreal]

To fellow SPs, how open are you about your personal life (friends, family, projects, childhood etc) with clients?

If I travel with a client, it's impossible not to talk about my personal life. We want to connect and have conversations about everything, get to know each other beyond the physical aspect. I don't withhold information; I don't think we can expect to remain private during an extended appointment or a trip.

Shorter appointments are not asking for the same level of openness to have a great moment, but also we don't have the time to go deeper, so I'm more private about my personal life.

 

[Lunaseraphim]

If I travel with a client, it's impossible not to talk about my personal life. We want to connect and have conversations about everything, get to know each other beyond the physical aspect. I don't withhold information; I don't think we can expect to remain private during an extended appointment or a trip.

Shorter appointments are not asking for the same level of openness to have a great moment, but also we don't have the time to go deeper, so I'm more private about my personal life.

Ah yeah! That's another thing. During longer appointments connection is more likely to happen on a deeper level..

 

[Rebaynia]

To fellow SPs, how open are you about your personal life (friends, family, projects, childhood etc) with clients?

I don't have much of a filter. I talk freely for the most part. I can talk about kids as a parent, but I don't like the moment what gender of my kids comes up. I prefer clients see my kids as genderless. We can share our parenting and stuff, it comes up when with dads looking to share about their kids.

Or I will talk about what I do for my other job, but I don't like when they start to narrow it down to what location, or what name is on the front of the building.

I also tend to be protective of information on my friendships and colleagues. I am willing to talk about myself, but I am not willing to talk about them, beyond saying they are lovely people and mean a lot to me.

My relationship and it's dynamic is fine to talk about. It does seem to intrigue others, and is so much a part of who I am. Can't mistake the thick metal collar always present, It is worn like a badge of honor.