Are you suggesting that there was some suicidal ideation going on in that original message?
Ever felt your life was meaningless?
- Thread starter Halloween Mike
- Start date
Are you suggesting that there was some suicidal ideation going on in that original message?
We all should show some empathy to our fellow Man / Woman Sidney may have picked up a note of desperation in the original post. Hopefully all will be OK. We all get down from time to time and the fact that the original poster reached out and shared his concern about "life being meaningless" is good.
Thank you, tho some of your list doesn't apply for me... (ie: have not, and will not ever have children. I refuse to have any knowing that I could never provide well enough for them)
BTW, the dependent is not older, just an adult with a chronic health disorder
Hey guys,
I am sorry i didn't answer before. I posted this from my hotel on friday night, and yesterday i had to come back home. So i spent the day in the bus, then at a friend's place since i visited him until he finally lift me back home. I had my stuff to unpack, other stuff to connect, well i didn't spent much time online yesterday. Then i got to sleep at 11, and i woke up 30 mins ago... so yeah i had lots of hours of sleep to catch
Thanks to all the people that showed support, its much apreciated. I am still unsure of what is gonna happen next to me. For the moment i am home, i am taking roots again and i still need to hear from Jimmy at WT. I can't tell you what is gonna happen next for me because i don't know at all. And the answer does not depend of me. But i should be fixed by the end of the week tough. In any case, no i am not suicidal, lol, not at all and sometimes i am just asking questions to myself in the meaning of life. I just feel i want to make a difference, and i felt for the past weeks, despise some hard parts i was able to, and that felt good.
I think i was just simply overwhelmed by the situation. As Bob put it , i supose its a combination of things. Its really different to leave a town where you know everybody and everything is warm and welcoming. And it was the first time i spent that much time in MTL , especially by myself. I was once at a friends place for 1 weeks, but we only got out in the day in stores, and we where always together at her home. Maybe i cracked a bit when i tough i would not..
And still i was not alone, i had Walleye, i got out with Pat and Bob once too, i made friends among the girls at WT, and i thanks all these person for the help and support they gave me cause witout them it would had been harder.
In any case thanks again for all the support, and no matter what will happen next, i will still be Halloween Mike on merb for a long time to come
I am sorry i didn't answer before. I posted this from my hotel on friday night, and yesterday i had to come back home. So i spent the day in the bus, then at a friend's place since i visited him until he finally lift me back home. I had my stuff to unpack, other stuff to connect, well i didn't spent much time online yesterday. Then i got to sleep at 11, and i woke up 30 mins ago... so yeah i had lots of hours of sleep to catch
Thanks to all the people that showed support, its much apreciated. I am still unsure of what is gonna happen next to me. For the moment i am home, i am taking roots again and i still need to hear from Jimmy at WT. I can't tell you what is gonna happen next for me because i don't know at all. And the answer does not depend of me. But i should be fixed by the end of the week tough. In any case, no i am not suicidal, lol, not at all and sometimes i am just asking questions to myself in the meaning of life. I just feel i want to make a difference, and i felt for the past weeks, despise some hard parts i was able to, and that felt good.
I think i was just simply overwhelmed by the situation. As Bob put it , i supose its a combination of things. Its really different to leave a town where you know everybody and everything is warm and welcoming. And it was the first time i spent that much time in MTL , especially by myself. I was once at a friends place for 1 weeks, but we only got out in the day in stores, and we where always together at her home. Maybe i cracked a bit when i tough i would not..
And still i was not alone, i had Walleye, i got out with Pat and Bob once too, i made friends among the girls at WT, and i thanks all these person for the help and support they gave me cause witout them it would had been harder.
In any case thanks again for all the support, and no matter what will happen next, i will still be Halloween Mike on merb for a long time to come
Maybe this is true? Maybe even when we hobby we can make a difference? I am always kind as well (unless we are role playing PSE but that is by mutual consent). I know for fact a girl that I was seeing in Sao Paulo everyday was just saving up to have some dental work done. Her rate at the Privy was dirt cheap so I tipped her very well. I only found out about the dental work later.
OK, thanks for letting me know. Thank God this person has someone like you looking out for them.
Hey guys, In any case thanks again for all the support, and no matter what will happen next, i will still be Halloween Mike on merb for a long time to come
This is good to hear. You seem like a good egg.
Get yourself together HM, move your arse and go look for a real job. Take a break from the hobby, this is not helping you at all. You mentioned that you were taking courses to drive tracks, that was a step in the right direction, did you get your certification? If so, are you trying to find a job in that field? You are still young and have all the future in front of you. Build yourself a solid work experience and a decent CV that will prove useful a few years from now. I am being delibarately harsh here as I don't think that patting your shoulders is helping you.
HFE (as in HarshForEver)
Hi Mike, I think everybody in this thread cares about you, so knowing you are OK definitely comforts us. It's good that it was just an overwhelming situation, and it's even better that you are aware of it yourself. What I suggest would be to try something you've always wanted to try but never had the opportunity to try. It can be anything (as long as you are not hurting someone or yourself) and it does not have to be helping others; but if it happens to be helping others, then even better.
I was once at a support group, and the facilitator told us, what people regret most is not what they did, but what they didn't do. Therefore, I think what I suggested would get you going in the right direction. And once you feel better, you can even try more things to make it more meaningful to you.
Just my two cents.
Henry
I was once at a support group, and the facilitator told us, what people regret most is not what they did, but what they didn't do. Therefore, I think what I suggested would get you going in the right direction. And once you feel better, you can even try more things to make it more meaningful to you.
Just my two cents.
Henry
Mike,
When you first came onto MERB i was not too sure about you as we kinda disagree a lot it seemed. After we met at the PJ's GT last August i soon realised you are a super nice guy with a good heart. I think you should distance yourself from the hobby somewhat to be totally honest with you as one friend to another. I know it will be hard to do that but in getting to know you, thats how i feel. Ever need to talk, you know how to reach me bro.
When you first came onto MERB i was not too sure about you as we kinda disagree a lot it seemed. After we met at the PJ's GT last August i soon realised you are a super nice guy with a good heart. I think you should distance yourself from the hobby somewhat to be totally honest with you as one friend to another. I know it will be hard to do that but in getting to know you, thats how i feel. Ever need to talk, you know how to reach me bro.
I personally think at the same age I would have lacked the maturity to be able to handle the hobby so there is no shame in that.
I recall a few years ago another guy who was the same age as HM, had same issues and he flamed out. He lacked the emotional maturity to be able to handle everything. I met this guy at a few parties, nice guy but I could tell from talking to him he was not able to handle things financially or in particular emotionally. He kind of disappeared from MERB a few years ago.
I have not met you but based on what I am hearing it sounds like the same song all over again.
I recall a few years ago another guy who was the same age as HM, had same issues and he flamed out. He lacked the emotional maturity to be able to handle everything. I met this guy at a few parties, nice guy but I could tell from talking to him he was not able to handle things financially or in particular emotionally. He kind of disappeared from MERB a few years ago.
I have not met you but based on what I am hearing it sounds like the same song all over again.
I was debating saying this but you literally took the words out of my mouth. I often disagree with HM with some of his views, especially regarding quebec (and the fact he kept saying he'd want to acknowledge an SP in public even after all of the SPs came on and said they specifically didn't want that), but I've also pm'ed with him talking about his personal life over the last years. It sounds like he's doing better than back in the day but I think getting out of the hobby for a bit and even spending less time with gaming would probably help. Mainly in the sense of getting more quality human contact in the real life and building real relationships. This gets debated endlessly here but I think a real relationship would help and I know it's much harder when you've never had one, but hobbying only kills your motivation. Sure you might go on a drought, possibly a very long drought, but that's life.
I don't want to speculate what your issue is so if my advice is way off base, I'd at least say that you need to decide what it is that you're missing and what will make you happy and actively try to pursue that with a positive attitude even if you don't think you can. Otherwise 20 years from now we'll be having this same conversation.
I don't have much time now, so a more complete answer will come later. But just be sure i manage to handle fine the hobby before becoming a booker, i just feel this may have overhelm me too much. But i will be able to put my shit together and i will not quit, be sure of that
Ok, i will answer a few things
1) Getting away from the xbox was not the problem. Yes i did miss it a bit, and yeah i was glad to go back on COD tonight with one of my buddy, but i can manage to not game during a certain time and i do ok.
2) The hobby is not really a problem, i was dealing with it fine before getting on the other side of it. I just feel me and Jimmy have a very different view of it, and being a client before didn't help. I know manapart was able to make the transition well, but it was another agency, another way of running things, and i can tell its very different at WT. I made mistake, yes i did, but it was stronger than me and well it costed me. Now i guess i will just turn the page on this, be back to my regular life, start back my old job and everything will be fine again.
3) As for hobbying, well i know what i am gonna do, but i won't discuss it on the board for now. One thing for sure, for the ones invited, i will be at the GG party that is coming up.
4) Thanks to Iggy and the others, and yeah i know where i can reach you, but i am still waiting for that yahoo messenger invite lol, do you have my adresse? I have bob and wallseye so far.
1) Getting away from the xbox was not the problem. Yes i did miss it a bit, and yeah i was glad to go back on COD tonight with one of my buddy, but i can manage to not game during a certain time and i do ok.
2) The hobby is not really a problem, i was dealing with it fine before getting on the other side of it. I just feel me and Jimmy have a very different view of it, and being a client before didn't help. I know manapart was able to make the transition well, but it was another agency, another way of running things, and i can tell its very different at WT. I made mistake, yes i did, but it was stronger than me and well it costed me. Now i guess i will just turn the page on this, be back to my regular life, start back my old job and everything will be fine again.
3) As for hobbying, well i know what i am gonna do, but i won't discuss it on the board for now. One thing for sure, for the ones invited, i will be at the GG party that is coming up.
4) Thanks to Iggy and the others, and yeah i know where i can reach you, but i am still waiting for that yahoo messenger invite lol, do you have my adresse? I have bob and wallseye so far.
Where did I say that? Read the last part " Kids are not for all " I have many single friends who are very happy with their lives. I simply stated that kids are good for having a purpose, nothing else.
Seriously HM, go find yourself a nice job and a nice girlfriend. People who met you write that you are a likable person so probably you deserve a better life out of fantasy land. Don t keep denying the obvious. Though at the end of the day this is your life and you are an adult. We can try to advice you here but the ultimate decision is yours.
You did mention in a past post the hobby was your first sexual experience, not good for a young person ( to hit it hard ) as it is a fantasy land. Never give up because every day has a tomorrow and as people have mentioned you seem like a decent guy.
You got it but you have not responded yet??? Take good care Amigo and see you at the Party.... you better be ready to have a few cocktails tho
was worried also, thanks for replying mike nice to see your friends iggy and others taking care of you
about that gg party iggy missed the last one du to work, would like to contact you
for the next onebut don't know how . please send me pivate message on how to pm you
about that gg party iggy missed the last one du to work, would like to contact you
for the next onebut don't know how . please send me pivate message on how to pm you
see you at the Party.... you better be ready to have a few cocktails tho
Haha, yeah no worry on that, i am still the hardest rock to lay down, ask Wallseye
Sorry about yesterday on yahoo, i was just tired and i got to sleep early. Still curious to hear what you mentioned tough.
I am no longer part of WT. Me and Jimmy had different views on the business. But i am glad of the time i spent there, i met some wonderfull persons, and only for that it was all worth it. I am glad they gave me this opportunity and sometimes you just realize something is not for you.
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