Fradi,
Perhaps you are not familiar with social anxiety disorders, "being natural" in some cases means major stage fright and feet inserted into mouth. Guys choke with women just like soccer players choke on a penalty kick and kick it 10 feet over the net.
In the universe of guys who don't have anxiety issues, some are more gifted talkers than others and can put women at ease and schmooze them: the 3 guys I used to bring to Montreal with me are all in the financial industry and work as salesman of securities. They are gifted schmoozers and I have seen them operate with civilian women as well as escorts and they have game. This means women are comfortable around them and are somewhat entertained as opposed to being bored or feeling awkward. In a party setting it's important to have some social skills and promote festive atmosphere rather than defeat it. My observations are that some guys are much better at it than others. I also believe games can be worked on and improved, no different than the soccer player working on his PK after he kicks one 10 feet over net. Practice and repetition hones skills. For me Seeking Arrangement was a good ongoing practice session on maintaining my own game because most of the women there that are worth seeing you have competition for. and if she has an offer of what she wants from you and 5 other guys, she is going with the guy who has the best rap. Many on SA don't even want to talk financials until they have chatted with you, which is a vetting process. In effect its to see if you have game or are a creep. And if you are socially dysfunctional, or even below average in game, you get beat and you lose. It's sport, like soccer.
Perhaps you are not familiar with social anxiety disorders, "being natural" in some cases means major stage fright and feet inserted into mouth. Guys choke with women just like soccer players choke on a penalty kick and kick it 10 feet over the net.
In the universe of guys who don't have anxiety issues, some are more gifted talkers than others and can put women at ease and schmooze them: the 3 guys I used to bring to Montreal with me are all in the financial industry and work as salesman of securities. They are gifted schmoozers and I have seen them operate with civilian women as well as escorts and they have game. This means women are comfortable around them and are somewhat entertained as opposed to being bored or feeling awkward. In a party setting it's important to have some social skills and promote festive atmosphere rather than defeat it. My observations are that some guys are much better at it than others. I also believe games can be worked on and improved, no different than the soccer player working on his PK after he kicks one 10 feet over net. Practice and repetition hones skills. For me Seeking Arrangement was a good ongoing practice session on maintaining my own game because most of the women there that are worth seeing you have competition for. and if she has an offer of what she wants from you and 5 other guys, she is going with the guy who has the best rap. Many on SA don't even want to talk financials until they have chatted with you, which is a vetting process. In effect its to see if you have game or are a creep. And if you are socially dysfunctional, or even below average in game, you get beat and you lose. It's sport, like soccer.