The "incel" sub-culture

[CaptRenault]

No one can know what's truly in the hearts and minds of escorts...or lots of other people such as co-workers, salespeople and other professionals that we hire or interact with on a professional basis. The only thing that we can really judge is whether another person that we hire to provide a service treats us with respect, friendliness and fairness. You can tell when an escort is treating you well or not, just as you can tell that about other kinds of "service providers." In the end that's all that matters.

 

[Fradi]

I am afraid you are wrong here. Most here thrive on the illusion... We are a minority who do not.

cheers,

Illusion or not, I do care, not that she is crazy for me but that she likes being with me and at least looks forward to our meetings a little.
They are not robots, every woman likes/prefers to be with someone who treats them with kindness, escorts are no different.
They are not stupid either and know how to please someone who treats them well.

This is why I prefer Indies and having an ATF and repeat visits.
It beats dating a 50- 60 something woman who you have no interest in and carries a shit load of baggage and expects you to be their financial saviour because they have screwed up their life and even the most attractive ones cannot hold a candle to a 25-30 year old escort.

It is what it is , if you are realistic about it there are fabulous SP, act or not, that are just amazing to spend time with.

 

[curly]

Looks is the most important thing. You just got to look good. As much as women do not admit it they are primarily attracted to a mans looks then after his swagg. .

Social skills trump beauty hands down. You can be forgiven for being clumsy if you are handsome. But a socially skilled guy with average look will win most of the time over a handsome clumsy guy. The girl has to be proud to be with you and her friends must like you. If you are handsome and socially awkward, you aren't a worth as much as if you make her friends laugh.

 

[jalimon]

Completely agree Cloud. I would add to social skills that being tall greatly helps too. Girl do generally like their men tall. Believe me i know

Cheers,

 

[curly]

You're agreeing with Cloud or with what I wrote?

 

[jalimon]

You're agreeing with Cloud or with what I wrote?

Oups! haha read your post, agreed with your post in my head but somehow wrote Cloud instead of Curly ! sorry!

 

[Valcazar]

This took a wild turn away from incel culture.

Julia above is right about the actual incel subculture - it isn't about not getting laid, it is a whole fucked up, sexist, Evo-Psych worldview. (And an ironic one since the term was invented by a woman to describe herself.)

 

[jalimon]

Valcazar could we call them extreme frustrated misogynist?

Cheers,

 

[Julia Sky]

Yes we could because that’s what incels are lol. I feel bad for the single guys who aren’t psycho who describe themselves as "incels" because they think being an incel Just means you’re single. Imagine not knowing you’re really telling the world "I’m an extreme, frustrated misogynistic moron" hahahah. Guys need to stop describing themselves as incel when what they really mean is single.

 

[EagerBeaver]

The so called incel subculture grew exponentially with the "Retribution" video posted by Elliot Rodgers, the California mass shooter who became an icon of this so called "movement":

https://www.nytimes.com/video/us/100000002900707/youtube-video-retribution.html

This guy was a misogynist psycho, but to many, he was a hero, and he has drawn admiration and praise from many incels. The Retribution video is an ertswhile manifesto for many incels.

 

[Valcazar]

I'm not sure it actually grew exponentially from ER. It was already pretty huge, but there may be numbers to show growth. He definitely marked a shift into the whole "the proper thing to do is go violent and take out the foids" attitude, though. Definitely a shift to the more violent after that. But there has been a lot of overlap of radical groups on line, so I am not sure how much of the increasingly violent rhetoric isn't just part of the same post-gamergate trend in white nationalism and so on. There may just be general growth across the board in such groups.

 

[EagerBeaver]

Valacazar,

It’s probably difficult to quantify the exact impact of the Elliot Rodger Retribution video, but I did read an article on incel subculture which said that it’s viewed as a Manifesto by many incels, sort of like Mein Kampf was for the Nazi movement. ER is viewed as this Dark Knight who acted upon his beliefs, twisted though they may be.

 

[Valcazar]

Absolutely.
He is "Saint Elliot".

His whole reasoning was straight out of their rhetoric and he was on PUAhate.
Minassian claimed "Supreme Gentleman" Elliot Rodger as an inspiration. On some incel forums, they still celebrate "Saint Elliot's Day".

As far as I know those forums didn't exist back then (but PUAhate was basically an incel forum). I can't tell if the movement really has grown or just gotten more centralized around the term. But it absolutely got even more violent post Rodger

 

[jmioffe]

Montreal was a significant backdrop to the incel movement with the 1989 massacre at École Polytechnique: http://theconversation.com/the-1989...-an-act-of-terrorism-against-all-women-108260

 

[curly]

Montreal was a significant backdrop to the incel movement with the 1989 massacre at École Polytechnique: http://theconversation.com/the-1989...-an-act-of-terrorism-against-all-women-108260

Marc Lépine's motivation was to kill feminists, women taking the place of men in society. That's not what I understand incels hate. I believe it's got more to do with model-type women's choices of mating partners, which does not include themselves. Am I wrong?

 

[jalimon]

Marc Lépine's motivation was to kill feminists, women taking the place of men in society. That's not what I understand incels hate. I believe it's got more to do with model-type women's choices of mating partners, which does not include themselves. Am I wrong?

No you are correct.

But i suspect that Lepine was also very sexually frustrated. I mean when a guy wakes up once in a while besides a little cutie wearing only her panties he does not commit any violence. That is my own personal theory.

cheers,

 

[EagerBeaver]

The name Incel itself derives from "Involuntary Celibacy", so it is all about the sexual frustration arising from that situation. My understanding with Lepine is that he wasn't happy with women taking the place of men in an engineering school. This is more like basic misogyny taken to a violent extreme.

 

[curly]

And, correct me if I'm wrong, the difference between being single and incels, is that the later have given up, consider this as a permanent situation probably because they are aspiring to far more than what they can get in terms of partner or because they don't have the desire or don't consider it possible to improve themselves both physically and in terms of social skills.

 

[Valcazar]

Lepine doesn't appear to have identified as an incel (If I recall, he had problems getting a girlfriend but the subculture didn't exist at that point anyway) and his complaints were more specifically anti-feminist.

But there is a straight line here. Incels are aggressively anti-feminist. They are sort of the flip side of Pick Up culture - in that rather than believing they can learn cool tricks that make women want you because of "biology". they know any such tricks will fail (and therefore violence or suicide or revolution is the only answer.)

Just about everything Lepine believed about women taking men's jobs, being too uppity since the sexual revolution, trying to get advantages over men, etc is the same stuff. I'm sure if he was around today he would talk about hypergamy and Chads.

All these movements have bled into one another and influenced one another. I'd love to see a study of incel culture and how the violence grew over time. Was it a big part of it from the beginning? (I tend to think not), did it grow organically, or did people from other anti-women movements drift over and graft that violent strain in fertile soil?

 

[EagerBeaver]

the difference between being single and incels, is that the later have given up, consider this as a permanent situation probably because they are aspiring to far more than what they can get in terms of partner or because they don't have the desire or don't consider it possible to improve themselves both physically and in terms of social skills.

I think the first part of your statement is correct, but not the second part, which I bolded. If you listen to the Elliot Rodger Retribution video, which may be considered a template for incel mindsets (including a few I have met in my life), they don't believe self improvement is necessary or the issue at play in their involuntary celibacy. They do not see themselves as losers or socially awkward. They blame women for the rejections they are receiving. They see women as having made irrational choices in terms of their sexual partners, and in not choosing them. Women therefore are deserving of violence and death, as are the sexual partners they choose.

Rodgers probably creeped out every woman he ever met, and watching and listening to that video, we can all see why. Looks was not his issue. It was his attitude. He could not see it. Women do not want to be creeped out - they want men who act normal and who they are comfortable around. Would you be comfortable having Elliot Rodger in your house after hearing that kind of nonsense? Most women have radar for creepy behaviors and as soon as they sense them, it is all over.

It's a sort of irrational jealousy that drives the incel. Most of these guys cannot see in the mirror what is looking back at them. Some people who met Elliot Rodger, family friends, claim they knew something was wrong with him at age 8 or 9. The kid was in psychiatric treatment from age 6 til his death at 22, was never actually diagnosed with anything, and refused all proffered medications. His psychiatrist was sent a copy of the video and his manifesto before anything happened and told Rodgers' parents, who then contacted police - too late and after the fact.